What if you were Epic-level?

[fireinthedust]

Here's my question: You're at your computer, sipping your slurm, and suddenly inspiration hits you. You're suddenly an epic-level PC!

Any race, class, prc.

What do you do? (feel free to interact and counter one another). You're in modern... wherever you are.

I'll go first: I fix my heater! bwah-hahahhaha. Urm, ok, then I (obviously an Archmage of considerable might) create a giant floating citadel and an army of winged monkeys to enforce my will upon Toronto. Hmmm... monkey-themed roller-casters.

[Redwizard26]

shouldn't this go in silly message board games?
but incase I'm wrong
I would use all my great wealth and pay off my education then I would go to the middle east and fix all the problems myself and then I would solve world hunger

[Doglord]

Familiar spell! Behold the raven of ultimate power!

[Shazzbaa]

I'm just trying to figure out what class I'd be. Reasonably I think I'm a bard of some sort, due to a lack of combat usefulness but a decent diplomacy skill... but it'd be awesome to one day accidentally awaken my innate arcane magics ("I knew it! I knew I was just a late bloomer!") as a sorcerer.

Realistically, my life wouldn't change at all either way. I'd still be going to art school, I'd just happen to also be magical and/or able to change peoples' minds with a word (or a song). Though bardic abilities, I must admit, I might take advantage of every once in a while if I really felt I needed to convince someone of something...

But yeah... just knowing me, even if I was given phenomenal cosmic powers, I wouldn't use them much outside the small circle of influence I have now.

...

I would like a familiar, though.

[Wizzardman]

Epic level Wizard/Druid. Epic spellcasters all the way!

First thing I would do is show off a bit--test out my new capabilities with a couple presdigitations, some major illusions, a teleport or two...

Then, I would use my new powers to desperately attempt to influence American politics in the direction of SANITY. That might take an epic spell or two, but it'd be so worth it.

Next, I'd start crafting some epic spells to speed up the colonization of Mars. Because Mars is cool.

[silentknight]

Epic Monk!
Unparalleled awesomeness, times 2!
Bruce Lee + Chuck Norris + pure cool = me!
I just think that an average looking person, unarmed, unassuming that can kick the trash out of everything in sight but with the wisdom, harmony, oneness to realize you don't need to sounds too cool.
I suppose I would open a dojo to teach awesomeness to the masses.

[Hyrael]

Wizard-Druid Archane Heirophant, with a macaw familair/companion (AH makes them one and the same). I would be able to screw around with the laws of biology AND the laws of physics at once. good times. in my opinion, the world as it is is seriously messed up, and needs to be put back on track. Im not arrogant enough to think I know how to fix it, but I can hazard a few efforts that would give the world a chance to fix itself, plus arrange things to my own liking.

for race:..........something immortal, or at least very long-lived

I would take complete control over the north woods and prevent any development, polution or logging, and do the same to various other locations around the world, such as africa, the congo, a significant part of brazil (protected by an army of albino shouting gorillas and cassowaraies), keep an eye on costa rica...
remove the entirety of the middle-east region from existance and transplant it into it's own personal demi-plane (which I expect to last about five seconds before being blown up from within.)...
Telelport to europa and see if there's anything under the ice or not (i've always wondered), screw around with the school system to end this whole evoltion controversy, prevent book bannings, and stop religions screwballs from having any say in anything whatsoever (it CAN be done!)...
deliver swift, non-lethal retribution to certain choice individuals...

introduce a combine-style supression feild for a decade or two in an effort to cut down on the human population (im serious, this would solve SO many problems.)

and, maybe later, if this stuff doesnt pan out, or I do some deep thinking on the subject, trigger an ice age. just for kicks. clear the playing feild, hit the reset button, that sort of thing.

the above is semi-serious, as it reflects my own values and interests. And, Ive always wanted a parrot. I agree, that having a familiar would be awesom, and I wish there was more published material on them, to make them more usefull.

[Were-Sandwich]

Epic level wizard. 'cause then I'd be batman. Nah, Monk/Wizard/Enlightened Fist. Remove all unwanted individuals from the world, personally. Then push world politics back in the right direction. Then make the masses worship me as a god. Then pay a few folks a visit....

[Evil_Pacifist]

I would be a rogue/sorcerer/arcane trickster with improved unarmed strike. I would, I dunno, maybe steal stuff and be awesome in general.

[Gnorosch]

An epic rogue/wizard.

And I would create myself a pocket dimension in Switzerland.

[BardicLasher]

Craft a wondrous item that gives "Protection from Nukes" in a 1,000 mile radius and sell it to the highest bidder.

[Nahal]

Epic Wizard: The world is my playground. I can kill you with your nightmares, build a house out of nothing but magic, turn into a dragon, and generally make the laws of science sit down and shut up. Epic spellcasting only amplifies this. Basically I amuse myself by bending reality to my whim, then make my own world when this one becomes boring.

Epic Cleric of Cthulhu: Self-explanatory. "IA! IA! Cthulhu Ftaghn!" Islam is for pansies.

Epic Druid: Save the rainforest by teaching it to fight back. "All your lumber yard are belong to us!"

Epic Monk: "I'm Buddha, b*tches!"

Epic Fighter: Well, maybe not. Seriously, what would the point be?

[Fax Celestis]

I'd make myself an epic Sorceror and become the greatest thief of all time.

[Magnus_Samma]

I'd be an epic spellsword and rule a small country with an adamantine-covered enchanted fist.

[Behold_the_Void]

Epic level Psion, definitely. Extreme powers of the mind without having to worry about a spell book and spell components AND getting power progression into epic level so that I eventually exceed the wizard in extreme versatility and the sorcerer in extreme adaptability AND being able to craft epic powers? Yes please!

Not sure what I'd do with it though. Likely continue with business as usual until I think of something else that interests me more.

[storybookknight]

Probably an epic spellcaster of some sort... I would have my very own Island of Dr. Moreau and tamper with genetics so I can have man-eating plants, or maybe start breeding dragons which I will later use to alter the course of history.

[Dhavaer]

Epic Psion. I'd quit my job and find someone willing to pay me to do stuff with my crazy mind powers.

[Rykaj]

Easy. I'd be an epic bard and you'd see me on every tv channel, all over the world, all the time. :D

[Thexare Blademoon]

Semi-realistically, Rogue/Shadowdancer. I can't (or rather, shouldn't) sing, so bard's out. I'm simply not very strong, so Fighter's out (as a primary, but due to my interest in swordplay I could see it as an extra, maybe 15/10/4). I only have limited interest in nature, which kills Druid and, to a lesser extent, Ranger. I'm entirely non-religious, so byebye Cleric and Paladin. I'm definitely not charismatic, so there went the Sorcerer, and I hate studying (even though I learn fast), so not a Wizard.

This is taking my personality and current skills into consideration.

On the other hand, ideally, without thinking of personality and the like? Epic Wizard (Illusionist).

[NullAshton]

Probally epic psion. The ability to get ultimate power, without spending a single cent on anything? Yes please.

[I_Got_This_Name]

Well, I'd be a Wizard, definitely.

I probably wouldn't turn the world into my personal playground, but I'd do the occasional subtle thing to improve it in small ways. I would build myself a Demiplane, though.

[bosssmiley]

1: Epic Wizard.
2: Research and then spam epic spell "Origin of the Species: Smiley"
3: World domination through cutely anarchic joyfulness (infiltrating your homes one bowl of custard at a time!).
4: Profit!

[Soniku]

Epic level... shifter.

Yeah, thats the one.

I'd just go into a cat form and have a nice nap. Simple pleasures n_n

[Krimm_Blackleaf]

Deffinetly Epic sorcerer. I love the idea of casting powerful magic and look DAMN good doing it.

"oh no! my daughter's stuck in that flood!"
"don't worry ma'am, I'll save your daughter!"
*BLAM* "oh hell....uhhh...it was an ugly little girl anyway"
"oh thank you sir!"

[Nahal]

Or the Killer Gnome taken to level 40 or more... create illusions so powerful they might as well be the real thing.

[Aust_Arrowsplitter]

Epic Psion/Elocator.

Because travelling twice the speed of sound is for grandmas who need to get the lead out...

Besides, crazy mental powers isn't fun unless you can do something cool... like float instead of walk.

As for what I'd actually do?
...
Oooh! Use my powers to help scientists research FTL drives so we can colonize planets and stuff.

[Rex Idiotarum]

I'm sorry I was just taking care of a Hundred-Handed Giant, what were you talking about? O! I have to take care of that prismatic dragon, brb.

[Shiny, Bearer of the Pokystick]

Since you failed to specify just how epic-level, I'll be taking this to its logical conclusion:

20Rog/20Cler/60Psion(Telepath).

OR

20Rog/20Cler/60Wizard.

Your brains is mine! Sneakily mine! Also if I like you you don't have to worry about dying.

Oh, almost forgot; I'll almost certainly be PrC'ing to Epic Infiltrator, Thrallherd, Cerebramancer maybe, and maybe even something from Libris Mortis. Because, y'know, Zombies.

OOooh, and we get to pick Race, too? Whoo!
I pick Elan.

Live, live, live, through the tiresome millenia!

[Zincorium]

True necromancer. Because Goth is so much cooler when you have the power to back it up.

Oh, and the lichiness.

[Grim Greyscale]

Realistically? I'd be a Druid. If its what we would most WANT to be, Sorcerer by far. I've never been one for deviation. Boo Multiclassing!