Random Banter #196

[Mutant Sheep]

The book is pretty great, and the audiobook comes with the official Seal of Sheepey's Approval. Even though they don't inflect the way I want them to read the book, very good. Some physics nitpicks even I made when reading are the popular complaint, but a VERY fun read. Some jerk put the audiobook on YouTube, if you want a peek. Mark Hamill voices the Yonkers Guy.

[Dimonite]

Okay. So. I went to the movie theatre. I'm not going to rewrite the rant I just posted to a friend, I'll just leave it here, unedited for you all.

Zodi Rant (rated PG13):

Spoiler

Show

I'll tell you how it went
[10:22:47 AM] LaZodiac: it is infact raining
[10:22:51 AM] LaZodiac: not enough to be inconvienant
[10:22:54 AM] LaZodiac: but enough to set the mood
[10:22:56 AM] LaZodiac: I go to the movies
[10:22:59 AM] LaZodiac: Pacific Rim isn't there
[10:23:05 AM] LaZodiac: you know what is there?
[10:23:21 AM] LaZodiac: a sign that says what movies will be playing in this week, and what movies are coming soon in general
[10:23:37 AM] LaZodiac: what is playing, currently
[10:24:01 AM] LaZodiac: The Lone Ranger. A ****ty, poorly done action comedy that literally ****s all over the base franchise and then eats it then throws it up then ****s it
[10:24:11 AM] LaZodiac: The Heat, an action comedy about stealing ****. It's ****ing retarded
[10:24:39 AM] LaZodiac: Monster's University, a pixar sequel to a movie. This is the only movie even remotely good, but I don't care I didn't like Monser's Inc so this movie isn't interesting to me. And I haven't lived the university life so I won't find it as funny
[10:25:07 AM] LaZodiac: World War Z. This is another example of The Lorax movie, except instead of twisting backwards in on itself into awesome, it twisted backwards in on itself into **** garbage **** ****ery
[10:25:17 AM] LaZodiac: here are the movies that are COMING, for this week
[10:25:31 AM] LaZodiac: GRown Ups 2. ****ty sequel to a ****ty Adam Sandler comedy that everyone hated
[10:26:02 AM] LaZodiac: Turbo. Dreamworks pictures movie about a snail that wants to be a race car driving. It's supposed to be a comedy. It's not
[10:26:46 AM] LaZodiac: THE SMURFS 2. sequel to what is considered one of the single worst movies of all ****ing time. This one takes place in Paris because the actors wanted to relax in Paris, involves the "this is technicaly a zombie apocolypse" plotline from the Smurfs
[10:27:24 AM] LaZodiac: Percy Jackon: Sea of Monsters. ****ty sequel to a ****ty tween action comedy about the greek gods being reincarnated in the bodies of preteen to early teenage characters.
[10:28:18 AM] LaZodiac: We're The Millers (if anyone asks). A ****ty comedy about a drug dealer, a stripper (who will not be seen naked) a teenage runaway, and a virgin, all living together in the virgin's house. The comedy comes from the fact that all these underground people are faking living ogether as a family
[10:28:25 AM] LaZodiac: do you know what any of these movies aren't?
[10:28:53 AM] LaZodiac: THEY ARE NOT A ****ING DRAMATIC ACTION ROBOT VS MONSTERS ART HOUSE MOVIE FILED BY ONE OF THE GREATEST DIRECTORS IN THE ****ING MEDIUM OF MOVIES
[10:29:17 AM] LaZodiac: If you look at all these movies
[10:29:37 AM] LaZodiac: all the people involved in the writing and directing of the movies that are being shown here
[10:29:38 AM] LaZodiac: all of them
[10:29:40 AM] LaZodiac: ALL OF THEM
[10:29:43 AM] LaZodiac: are involved in stupid
[10:29:44 AM] LaZodiac: BOMBS
[10:29:48 AM] LaZodiac: movies that did not make money
[10:29:51 AM] LaZodiac: movies that ARE TERRIBLE
[10:30:02 AM] LaZodiac: movies that reviewers and basic public alike DESPISE
[10:30:43 AM] LaZodiac: Guillermo Del Toro's worst movie is Blade 2, which is considered an alright movie. His worst movie is "alright"
[10:30:52 AM] LaZodiac: the guy who directed Smurfs 2? His worst movie IS NOW SMURFS TWO
[10:30:58 AM] LaZodiac: IT USED TO BE SMURFS ONE

... I probably would have ended up watching Turbo. Because if I already left the house to go to the theater, I'm gonna watch a movie.

What does rice have to do with anything?! *ripping hair off* aaaaaah!

Since the Mutated One doesn't seem to have noticed your confusion, I will inform you that he cannot eat gluten, therefore rice flours are necessary in his cakes. That said: if he were to come to my area, I would gladly make him delicious gluten-free cake and/or scones.

Oh dear gods, I just watched the trailer.

HOW DID THEY GET NATHAN FILLION FOR THIS?

He probably read the books and didn't see the first movie. That's the only explanation I can think of.
Seriously, though, love those books. Even if the plot twist of the first one is reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeally predictable.

ION: I need to remember that people aren't generally telepaths and therefore I actually have to tell them things before they know them.

[FinnLassie]

Since the Mutated One doesn't seem to have noticed your confusion, I will inform you that he cannot eat gluten, therefore rice flours are necessary in his cakes. That said: if he were to come to my area, I would gladly make him delicious gluten-free cake and/or scones.

Oh! I've done a lot of gluten free stuff. Never used rice flour though!

[MoonCat]

Worst three months to go gluten and dairy free simultaneously? October, November, and December. I speak from experience.

[FinnLassie]

Worst three months to go gluten and dairy free simultaneously? October, November, and December. I speak from experience.

Oh, why is that? December, Christmas perhaps? Hmm. A lot of Finnish dishes are milk heavy, but are completely doable without. Sometimes even tastier.

[Amidus Drexel]

ION: I need to remember that people aren't generally telepaths and therefore I actually have to tell them things before they know them.

Isn't it annoying when people ask you questions that would be so much easier to answer if you could just telepathically impart to them everything they'd need to know? I think that sentence sums up nearly every conversation I've had with my dad in the past few weeks that wasn't about music.

Worst three months to go gluten and dairy free simultaneously? October, November, and December. I speak from experience.

Oh, why is that? December, Christmas perhaps? Hmm. A lot of Finnish dishes are milk heavy, but are completely doable without. Sometimes even tastier.

I'd imagine she means Halloween, Thanksgiving, and Christmas. Then again, I wouldn't drop gluten or dairy from my diet.

[MoonCat]

Oh, why is that? December, Christmas perhaps? Hmm. A lot of Finnish dishes are milk heavy, but are completely doable without. Sometimes even tastier.

I'd imagine she means Halloween, Thanksgiving, and Christmas. Then again, I wouldn't drop gluten or dairy from my diet.

Yep. If you live in the U.S., those are the three most miserable months. Naturally, when I was made to do that stupid gluten and dairy-free food thing, I was assigned those three months and those three months only.

[FinnLassie]

I'd imagine she means Halloween, Thanksgiving, and Christmas. Then again, I wouldn't drop gluten or dairy from my diet.

Oh, right. We don't celebrate the first two so they didn't really come to my mind.

Well... Some people have to, you know.

EDIT: Gosh darn it, Finn, your last three posts have started with "Oh!". Get a grip! That's bad language! *slap* Shut up!

[Dimonite]

Oh! I've done a lot of gluten free stuff. Never used rice flour though!

What? But...

HOW? All of our recipes call for a mixture of rice flour, potato starch, and tapioca flour. Gives the stuff good flavor and texture.

Isn't it annoying when people ask you questions that would be so much easier to answer if you could just telepathically impart to them everything they'd need to know? I think that sentence sums up nearly every conversation I've had with my dad in the past few weeks that wasn't about music.

This was more along the lines of "You were supposed to do this thing!" "But no one told me I was supposed to do that thing!" "But I knew you were supposed to do it so you should have known you were supposed to do it! Wait, that doesn't work..."

Yep. If you live in the U.S., those are the three most miserable months. Naturally, when I was made to do that stupid gluten and dairy-free food thing, I was assigned those three months and those three months only.

Who assigned this? Who was forcing you to give up gluten and dairy?

[MoonCat]

Who assigned this? Who was forcing you to give up gluten and dairy?

Medical people. It was an experiment that failed.

[Mutant Sheep]

Medical people. It was an experiment that failed.

Also, FDS horror Week (+more than a week) was at the same time, if'n I remember correctly.

[FinnLassie]

What? But...

HOW? All of our recipes call for a mixture of rice flour, potato starch, and tapioca flour. Gives the stuff good flavor and texture.

Oh, I used to do a lot of paleo-something based recipes! It's not good for nut allergics, though.

EDIT: Oh holy crap now, stop it with the oh's!

[MoonCat]

Also, FDS horror Week (+more than a week) was at the same time, if'n I remember correctly.

Yes, it was. I left in the beginning of January, those last three months were the worst of the time I still had there.

[Teddy]

EDIT: Gosh darn it, Finn, your last three posts have started with "Oh!". Get a grip! That's bad language! *slap* Shut up!

You could do worse. I'm pretty sure my most common word to start a quote respose with must be either "yeah" or "well", depending on whether I've been in agreement or disagreement the most, and I'm definitely sure my most common word to start a paragraph with must be "also"...

[Amidus Drexel]

Oh, right. We don't celebrate the first two so they didn't really come to my mind.

Well... Some people have to, you know.

EDIT: Gosh darn it, Finn, your last three posts have started with "Oh!". Get a grip! That's bad language! *slap* Shut up!

Ah, American holidays... chances to eat lots of food and scare little kids.

Perhaps, but do they really know what they're missing?

Heheheh, reminds me of the times I find myself using far too many adverbs.

This was more along the lines of "You were supposed to do this thing!" "But no one told me I was supposed to do that thing!" "But I knew you were supposed to do it so you should have known you were supposed to do it! Wait, that doesn't work..."

Well, now you're thinking of how my parents normally go about things.

Oh, I used to do a lot of paleo-something based recipes! It's not good for nut allergics, though.

EDIT: Oh holy crap now, stop it with the oh's!

With all of this talk about food intolerances, never have I been happier not being allergic to anything edible.

You could do worse. I'm pretty sure my most common word to start a quote respose with must be either "yeah" or "well", depending on whether I've been in agreement or disagreement the most, and I'm definitely sure my most common word to start a paragraph with must be "also"...

Aye, same here. Well, except for starting paragraphs with also.

[Taet]

Isn't it annoying when people ask you questions that would be so much easier to answer if you could just telepathically impart to them everything they'd need to know? I think that sentence sums up nearly every conversation I've had with my dad in the past few weeks that wasn't about music.

It would remove some trouble from asking people out on dates. And then add a whole new layer of trouble.

I wonder what would happen to words if we were telepathic. I think that we would keep a few words around for ideas that take a long time to think about but most short common words would not be needed any more. We would still think "algebra" instead of sharing an equation but we would not say "addition". Things like that.

[FinnLassie]

I did not start this post with an oh!

I would much rather be allergic to celery than dairy. Very much so.

[Mutant Sheep]

Does... Does ANYBODY eat celery? (Except the Fable guy?)

[Taet]

I'm eating celery right now with rice and tomato sauce.

Also I just swallowed hot tea and it went down the wrong way. Ow. It does not feel as bad as drowning but it hurts enough.

[Amidus Drexel]

It would remove some trouble from asking people out on dates. And then add a whole new layer of trouble.

I wonder what would happen to words if we were telepathic. I think that we would keep a few words around for ideas that take a long time to think about but most short common words would not be needed any more. We would still think "algebra" instead of sharing an equation but we would not say "addition". Things like that.

Indeed.

Depends on the type of telepathy, really. Are we talking about empathically imparting memories, or just purely mental communication? They're fairly different as to what they would do.

I would much rather be allergic to celery than dairy. Very much so.

QFT

Does... Does ANYBODY eat celery? (Except the Fable guy?)

No, because celery is horrible. I'll only eat it if it's boiled into a soup or something, so that it loses its texture and flavor. It's one of the few foods I dislike strongly enough to refuse to eat.

[Gnomes2169]

Drat, I need to subscribe to this new RB thread now... curse you, unofficial thread limit!

[Teddy]

Also I just swallowed hot tea and it went down the wrong way. Ow. It does not feel as bad as drowning but it hurts enough.

You seem to know a lot about drowning. Have you experienced it first-hand yourself?

[Taet]

Talking with the mind is just talking. It still has the same problems as talking. Telepathy I want it to be something special and better. Pictures and feelings. Sounds. All the senses. And I want it to have to be sent and not just what I am sensing at the time or you will have to taste this celery you do not want.

Yes. Drowning is either my first or second memory. I went down a water slide without my dad and sank. I'm glad the other one is nicer. That was watching old Doctor Who in the afternoon while dad took a nap.

[MoonCat]

Does... Does ANYBODY eat celery? (Except the Fable guy?)

I like celery and eat it. I don't love the strings, but everything else is good.

[FinnLassie]

Taet and MoonCat confirmed to be silly people. I mean, celery, of all things?

[LaZodiac]

Sorry Moony, but I'm siding with Finn on this one. I don't like celery at all X_X

[Deathkeeper]

Checking the forum while waiting for coming attractions. Giant robots on five. Hopefully the 3D doesn't get me sick to my stomach.

[Gnomes2169]

I like celery and eat it. I don't love the strings, but everything else is good.

It's especially good in stews or with peanutbutter. ^_^

[Coidzor]

Hey, LaLa, if I help you out from under the tissues, will you help me push these out of this corner?

I say we take off, nuke the site from orbit. It's the only way to make sure.

I don't follow, but okay.

No.

Are you familiar with the expression "me gusta?"

Exactly.

I despise those evenings. Now, I slept from about 7:30 to noon, today/last night/ *blonde hair of longness* <scream> TONITEE<holdSTRETCH note>

Zodi... *comment anyone can misinterpret in any way they want, for this declaration of extreme "best rant ever"-ness cannot be written or expressed properly and therefore is left to you, the readers, imagination.*

Also, that ending was the greatest ending. I'm just picturing this tall Zodi SCREAMING down a poor attendee's throat after backing off a bit. Just "HIS WORST MOVIE IS *spittle of unnecessary but kind of comical grossness* SMURFS TWO ROAAAAR".

Just ze worst. Have fun with your long hairs tonight.

Ship's got a new Zodi-crush, eh?

That mental image. It pleases me.

Pssst! Moonie! It means "Coidzor is totally hot, fo' reals!" Just look at his... Errr... Majesty... Beard coming out of his chin there...

Changeling? YOUR CHILD IS NOW A DITTO.

That's..A Pretty horrible condemnation of American Gods, there.

I'm Smashing and I know it. *clap clap*

Ah, brawl in the family has the best ditto comics.

Wait.

Why would you condemn Gaiman? My brain does not compute. -ghk-ghk-ghzzzt!- Priority Override: Crush. Kill. Destroy. Swag.

EDIT: Oh holy crap now, stop it with the oh's!

...Now you've reminded me of Maxwell's Silver Hammer....x.x ...Oh, oh, oh, oh....~

Does... Does ANYBODY eat celery? (Except the Fable guy?)

Yes?

Also, good component of jambalaya and gumbo. Some soups.

Thousands of Cajuns can't be wrong about Cajun food, I guarantee.

[Amidus Drexel]

Talking with the mind is just talking. It still has the same problems as talking. Telepathy I want it to be something special and better. Pictures and feelings. Sounds. All the senses. And I want it to have to be sent and not just what I am sensing at the time or you will have to taste this celery you do not want.

Yes. Drowning is either my first or second memory. I went down a water slide without my dad and sank. I'm glad the other one is nicer. That was watching old Doctor Who in the afternoon while dad took a nap.

The first one, then. Perhaps. I think we'd still use words, though; although maybe not, if we'd developed telepathy a long time ago.

I don't think it counts as drowning if you survive the experience...

Taet and MoonCat confirmed to be silly people. I mean, celery, of all things?

Sorry Moony, but I'm siding with Finn on this one. I don't like celery at all X_X

Both of you could not be more correct.

It's especially good in stews or with peanutbutter. ^_^

It is good in stews, I'll give it that. That's because the flavor and texture of it is gone, and it serves as a way to eat the broth.

I say we take off, nuke the site from orbit. It's the only way to make sure.

Also, good component of jambalaya and gumbo. Some soups.

Well, that would certainly take care of the plants, but it makes just as much work cleaning up my corner.

Indeed; see my comment on stews. Celery is good for one purpose and one purpose only; being reduced to filler to transfer the flavor of something better.