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  1. - Top - End - #1
    Halfling in the Playground
     
    ElfWarriorGuy

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    biggrin Alignment Mockeries

    You know how people often use terms for Dungeons and Dragons alignments that are not exactly "official"? And are more of a joke really?
    A few examples I have rolling around in my head are:
    Lawful Stupid, Neutral Boring, Neutral Indifferent, Adorable Evil,
    Chaotic Annoying, and Lawful Stick-Up-Your-Arse.

    Do you, my fellow playgrounders, have any more alignment mockeries that you find entertaining? If so, please post them in this thread
    Show mercy, and you will be shown mercy.

    "To see what is right, and not to do it, is want of courage."
    -Yoshimitsu

    "Your life is not your own."
    -Some Guy

    Death will come to us all eventually

  2. - Top - End - #2
    Titan in the Playground
     
    Sith_Happens's Avatar

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    Default Re: Alignment Mockeries

    "with anger issues," as a suffix/modifier to any of the actual alignments.
    Last edited by Sith_Happens; 2013-07-24 at 12:24 PM.
    Revan avatar by kaptainkrutch.
    Quote Originally Posted by Cirrylius View Post
    That's how wizards beta test their new animals. If it survives Australia, it's a go. Which in hindsight explains a LOT about Australia.

  3. - Top - End - #3
    Ogre in the Playground
     
    The Fury's Avatar

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    Default Re: Alignment Mockeries

    Well, Stupid is entire alignment axis isn't it?

    Stupid Good
    Stupid Evil
    Lawful Stupid
    Chaotic Stupid

    Though I guess for some reason there's no Stupid Neutral or Neutral Stupid.

  4. - Top - End - #4
    Colossus in the Playground
     
    hamishspence's Avatar

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    Default Re: Alignment Mockeries

    Quote Originally Posted by The Fury View Post
    Though I guess for some reason there's no Stupid Neutral or Neutral Stupid.
    Actually, there is:
    http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.ph.../StupidNeutral


    The Mr Welch list has a couple of interesting alignment mentions:

    651. My alignment is not Sarcastic Good.
    742. Apparently Chaotic Angry and Neutral Hungry aren't real alignments either.
    Last edited by hamishspence; 2013-07-24 at 12:42 PM.
    Marut-2 Avatar by Serpentine
    New Marut Avatar by Linkele

  5. - Top - End - #5
    Ettin in the Playground
     
    Kobold

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    Default Re: Alignment Mockeries

    My favorite is chaotic hungry.
    If you like what I have to say, please check out my GMing Blog where I discuss writing and roleplaying in greater depth.

  6. - Top - End - #6
    Troll in the Playground
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    Default Re: Alignment Mockeries

    One guy in my last campaign was 'Psychotic Neutral'.
    Imagine if all real-world conversations were like internet D&D conversations...
    Protip: DnD is an incredibly social game played by some of the most socially inept people on the planet - Lev
    I read this somewhere and I stick to it: "I would rather play a bad system with my friends than a great system with nobody". - Trevlac
    Quote Originally Posted by Kelb_Panthera View Post
    That said, trolling is entirely counterproductive (yes, even when it's hilarious).

  7. - Top - End - #7
    Firbolg in the Playground
     
    erikun's Avatar

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    Default Re: Alignment Mockeries

    I've also heard Chaotic Insane and Suicidally Evil. There is also Pacifist Good, which isn't always a bright idea.
    Thank you to zimmerwald1915 for the Gustave avatar.
    The full set is here.
    Quote Originally Posted by darthbobcat View Post
    There are no bad ideas, just bad execution.
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    Air Raccoon avatar provided by Ceika
    from the Request an OotS Style Avatar thread



    A big thanks to PrinceAquilaDei for the gryphon avatar!
    original image

  8. - Top - End - #8
    Titan in the Playground
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    Default Re: Alignment Mockeries

    Quote Originally Posted by erikun View Post
    I've also heard Chaotic Insane and Suicidally Evil. There is also Pacifist Good, which isn't always a bright idea.
    In a game whose mechanical focus is based around how to kill things? Not so much, though it could potentially work, especially if you use the actually fairly diverse non-lethal combat options.
    Being a spell-caster will help.
    Last edited by Ravens_cry; 2013-07-24 at 01:48 PM.
    Quote Originally Posted by Calanon View Post
    Raven_Cry's comments often have the effects of a +5 Tome of Understanding

  9. - Top - End - #9
    Barbarian in the Playground
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    Default Re: Alignment Mockeries

    Animals are usually Neutral Hungry. A lot of adventurers I met are Neutral Greedy.

  10. - Top - End - #10
    Titan in the Playground
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    Default Re: Alignment Mockeries

    I had a character I described as Lawful Noble. (This allowed him to fight the church's power.)

    Wolves are Neutral Hungry.

    I have occasionally run an NPC the characters wanted to do business with as Neutral Bored.

    I ran a Champions character as Silver Age Lawful Good, which is very different from Modern Age LG.

    I've considered running a character who is Chaotic Curious.

    But whatever people put on the character sheet, there are only 3 PC alignments: Lawful Snotty, Neutral Greedy, and Chaotic Backstabbing.

  11. - Top - End - #11
    Bugbear in the Playground
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    Default Re: Alignment Mockeries

    I have had characters end up Sarcastic Good more often than not.
    Games I'm in:

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    Askaretha's Ascension as Vaishirth

  12. - Top - End - #12
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Hyena's Avatar

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    Default Re: Alignment Mockeries

    Somebody said, and it's confirmed by my experience, there are only three aligments amongst the PCs - lawful snotty, neutral greedy and chaotic backstabbing.
    Last edited by Hyena; 2013-07-24 at 02:42 PM.
    I'm looking for a DM for a skype Star Wars Saga Edition game. If you are interested, please write me in skype (taumaturgist).

    Avatar by AddZabble

  13. - Top - End - #13
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    Kobold

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    Default Re: Alignment Mockeries

    One of my favorite characters was affectionally known as Chaotic Psychotic
    Quote Originally Posted by Rhyvurg View Post
    That's what they all say, then when you go to sleep, bam! Face full of alien wang.


  14. - Top - End - #14
    Orc in the Playground
     
    VariSami's Avatar

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    Default Re: Alignment Mockeries

    Ron Edwards's Elfs with Anal, Genital and Oral. Especially funny when you realize what Freud has to say about Anal and Oral personalities.
    Quote Originally Posted by Joseph Joestar (JoJo's Bizarre Adventure)
    OH! MY! GOD!

  15. - Top - End - #15
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Dr Bwaa's Avatar

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    Default Re: Alignment Mockeries

    I've seen versions of "Frightened" used on both axes.

    I've also seen "Chaotic tendencies" as a modifier on any alignment.

    And finally this is a touch off-topic but I think it's close enough that readers of this thread might enjoy it-- I have a character with the following on his sheet:
    born with the Paladin's FIGHT EVIL class feature (despite the lack of Paladin levels)
    For people who enjoy reading or writing.

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    Awesome banner/avatar by El_Frenchie!

    Play chess? Look me up! (bwaa)


    Formerly known as lordhenry4000

  16. - Top - End - #16
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Arkhosia's Avatar

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    Default Re: Alignment Mockeries

    Lawful good: warden good (you can do this this and this. Do this, I hit you 200 times.)
    Nuetral good: Nuetral hypocrisy (I'd love to help these beggars, but if I do I can't buy a +2 sword)
    Chaotic good: ignorant good (I want to free them! Anarchy! No order! Let the people live without your benevolent tyranny,_____[Nuetral good king])
    Avatar by Gulaghar, thanks so much!

    "Are we living a life that is safe from harm? Of course not, we never are. But that's not the right question. The question is: are we living a life that is worth the harm?"
    ~Welcome to Night Vale

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    Quote Originally Posted by Magtok
    If it'll keep you from linking that abomination ever again, then fine. You're evil enough. You win.

  17. - Top - End - #17
    Titan in the Playground
     
    Flumph

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    Default Re: Alignment Mockeries

    Quote Originally Posted by Hyena View Post
    Somebody said, and it's confirmed by my experience, there are only three aligments amongst the PCs - lawful snotty, neutral greedy and chaotic backstabbing.
    Quote Originally Posted by Jay R View Post
    But whatever people put on the character sheet, there are only 3 PC alignments: Lawful Snotty, Neutral Greedy, and Chaotic Backstabbing.
    This is all you really need. No, your character is not an exception.


    I sometimes go with the ones already mentioned, plus:
    • Chaotic Crazy.
    • Chaotic Nutjob.
    • Chaotic Douche.
    • Chaotic Totally-not-Evil.
    • Moustache-Twirling Evil.
    • Cartoon-Villain Evil.

  18. - Top - End - #18
    Orc in the Playground
     
    ClericGirl

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    Default Re: Alignment Mockeries

    One of my PCs had her alignment referred to as Chaotic Female by my DM.

  19. - Top - End - #19
    Firbolg in the Playground
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    Default Re: Alignment Mockeries

    *Suscribe*
    Lawful Pragmatic.
    Lawful As*hole.
    Bored Evil.
    What's a wall? Chaotic.
    Omnisexuetral.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sun Hunter's Recruitment
    Quote Originally Posted by Sliver View Post
    Saying no to a Sun's Hunter is as close as it gets to an invitation to have your place destroyed by them)\
    Quote Originally Posted by Vedhin View Post
    In other words, be nice to the murderhobos so they don't murder you?
    Quote Originally Posted by JanusJones View Post
    The professional, well-funded, well-backed, card-carrying, licensed murderhobos, yes.
    Quote Originally Posted by Chilingsworth View Post
    Congrats, you made me laugh hard enough to draw my family's attention.


    Life is Hectic.

  20. - Top - End - #20
    Firbolg in the Playground
     
    Dimers's Avatar

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    Default Re: Alignment Mockeries

    Lawful German.

    Pollyanna Good.

    Neutral Butler.

    EDIT: Oh, and in addition to their other more descriptive actual alignment, quite a few paladins and monks are Lawful Supposedly.
    Last edited by Dimers; 2013-07-24 at 10:23 PM.
    Avatar by Meltheim: Eveve, dwarven battlemind, 4e Dark Sun

    Current games list

  21. - Top - End - #21
    Ogre in the Playground
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    Default Re: Alignment Mockeries

    Necessary Evil
    Lawful Empirical
    Chaotic Confusing
    If you feel like quoting something that I have said, you have my permission to use it. Unless it makes me look stupid.
    Gaming Laws, Fallacies And More
    Avatar by Kymme
    My Homebrew
    Feel free to browse and comment on any of my Homebrew. I enjoy feedback.
    Love my Avatar? Well, why not check out the comic that it came from?

  22. - Top - End - #22
    Ogre in the Playground
     
    The Fury's Avatar

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    Default Re: Alignment Mockeries

    Quote Originally Posted by hamishspence View Post
    Haha! I guess I stand corrected.

    Quote Originally Posted by Slipperychicken View Post
    This is all you really need. No, your character is not an exception.
    Admittedly most of my [lawful] characters are pretty snotty.

  23. - Top - End - #23
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Arkhosia's Avatar

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    Default Re: Alignment Mockeries

    Buzzkill Good
    Cliche Good
    Anarchic Good
    Sargeant Neutral
    Donkey-Carrot Neutral
    Lead-Sheet Neutral
    Lawyer Evil
    Monologue Evil
    Megalomaniac Evil
    Last edited by Arkhosia; 2013-07-25 at 12:58 AM.
    Avatar by Gulaghar, thanks so much!

    "Are we living a life that is safe from harm? Of course not, we never are. But that's not the right question. The question is: are we living a life that is worth the harm?"
    ~Welcome to Night Vale

    Spoiler: Quotes from Friends <3
    Show
    Quote Originally Posted by Magtok
    If it'll keep you from linking that abomination ever again, then fine. You're evil enough. You win.

  24. - Top - End - #24
    Banned
     
    Scow2's Avatar

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    Default Re: Alignment Mockeries

    Quote Originally Posted by Arkhosia View Post
    Lead-Sheet Neutral
    This one's great (Removed joke-ruiner and fixed spelling for you)

  25. - Top - End - #25
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Arkhosia's Avatar

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    Default Re: Alignment Mockeries

    Quote Originally Posted by Scow2 View Post
    This one's great (Removed joke-ruiner and fixed spelling for you)
    Detect evil not working reinforces it, leading us to the only logical conclusion: Chaotic Neutral people ritually rub liquid lead in themselves. Also, they are all secretly dragons.
    Avatar by Gulaghar, thanks so much!

    "Are we living a life that is safe from harm? Of course not, we never are. But that's not the right question. The question is: are we living a life that is worth the harm?"
    ~Welcome to Night Vale

    Spoiler: Quotes from Friends <3
    Show
    Quote Originally Posted by Magtok
    If it'll keep you from linking that abomination ever again, then fine. You're evil enough. You win.

  26. - Top - End - #26
    Titan in the Playground
     
    Flumph

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    Default Re: Alignment Mockeries

    Quote Originally Posted by Arkhosia View Post
    Detect evil not working reinforces it, leading us to the only logical conclusion: Chaotic Neutral people ritually rub liquid lead in themselves. Also, they are all secretly dragons.
    They also passed the OOC Bluff check to convince the DM they aren't Evil.

  27. - Top - End - #27
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    JustSomeGuy's Avatar

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    Default Re: Alignment Mockeries

    I heard there's a clerical curse 'missed his nap' which modifies the target's alignment to 'chaotic grumpy'.

  28. - Top - End - #28
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Arkhosia's Avatar

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    Default Re: Alignment Mockeries

    Quote Originally Posted by Slipperychicken View Post
    They also passed the OOC Bluff check to convince the DM they aren't Evil.
    Not true: they either bribed the DM with food, remembered his birthday, or invoked obscure rules (those who get the joke win an Internet).
    Avatar by Gulaghar, thanks so much!

    "Are we living a life that is safe from harm? Of course not, we never are. But that's not the right question. The question is: are we living a life that is worth the harm?"
    ~Welcome to Night Vale

    Spoiler: Quotes from Friends <3
    Show
    Quote Originally Posted by Magtok
    If it'll keep you from linking that abomination ever again, then fine. You're evil enough. You win.

  29. - Top - End - #29
    Ogre in the Playground
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    Default Re: Alignment Mockeries

    Quote Originally Posted by Arkhosia View Post
    Not true: they either bribed the DM with food, remembered his birthday, or invoked obscure rules (those who get the joke win an Internet).
    I thought doing all of those things rewarded you with level ups?
    If you feel like quoting something that I have said, you have my permission to use it. Unless it makes me look stupid.
    Gaming Laws, Fallacies And More
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    Feel free to browse and comment on any of my Homebrew. I enjoy feedback.
    Love my Avatar? Well, why not check out the comic that it came from?

  30. - Top - End - #30
    Spamalot in the Playground
     
    DigoDragon's Avatar

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    Default Re: Alignment Mockeries

    The three my group uses often are~

    Chaotic Nutty (players that constantly come up with bad ideas)
    Chaotic Butter (players that constantly enact said bad ideas)
    Toast (players that died from said bad idea, usually by fire)
    Digo Dragon - Artist
    D&D 5e Homebrew: My Little Pony Races
    Avatar by me - Doc Wagon

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