Circle of Assassins XIII: Wonderland Bloodbath

**Ramsus** · 2013-12-15, 04:18 AM (ISO 8601)

If you don't understand the difference between trying to publicly play off people ALREADY trying to kill me against each other for one day and four people privately agreeing to target me until I'm forced out of the game then yeah.... I'm not surprised you don't understand what fun means.

Edit: Just so things are perfectly clear... What's making me question whether or not I'm going to stop playing games here again is not that I got ganged up on for the crime of trying to spice up a game. I knew it was a risky move. No, my issue is that the people who made the decision to gang up on me and decide I don't get to play don't care at all that this ruined the fun for someone and that most likely, if past experience tells me anything, nobody is going to even think they did anything wrong or punish them for playing poorly. (I don't mean playing in a meanspirited way, I mean playing in a way that should result in getting you killed.) (But friggin seriously, in normal play of this game I should not KNOW I'm almost certainly going to die until the final rounds. Pointedly pushing someone out of a game is such amazingly poor behavior I'm amazed that you aren't afraid to do it for fear other people will refuse to play with you in other games.)

**Penguinator** · 2013-12-15, 10:29 AM (ISO 8601)

Guys, it's a gaaaaaaame...

**Cuthalion** · 2013-12-15, 10:35 AM (ISO 8601)

Originally Posted by Ramsus

No Tanar, it's not the same. If you hadn't noticed four of you have tried to kill me two days in a row. Whereas I alone targeted one person multiple times (in revenge for them trying to kill me). The first day you guys doing it was excusable. After seeing I didn't have any blatant alliance working against any of you it wasn't. It was just meanspirited and anti-fun.

It sure as heck shouldn't "always happen" that alliances are incredibly blatant and go unpunished. Really, teaming together in such an obvious way should always result in suicide by drawing targets on your own backs.

There won't be a next time since every time I join this style of game people refuse to do anything but essentially behave in a one sided bullyish manner as opposed to doing things that are fun or involved any amount of subtlety.

Okay, let's calm down. I'm not even a member of the alliance, just you were killing everyone so I decided to try for you. I put my guess as you being the Hatter before they even PMed me saying that nobody's guessed that yet. This is my third game, and I think the best way to get around these things is going for the easiest target. Irregardless of alliances.

**Ramsus** · 2013-12-15, 01:32 PM (ISO 8601)

Well, have fun being the new easiest target. Super lots of fun having everyone gang up against you. Yup. That's certainly the most fun way to play a game that's supposed to be about paranoia, backstabbing, intrigue, and never knowing when you're safe and when you aren't. Yuuuuuuuuuuuuuuup.

Btw "I wasn't part of the alliance" & "they PMed me and I continued to do it another night in a row" clash. You took part means you took part whether you signed up for the official alliance of anti-fun newsletter or not.

If all you care about is the "best" way to win then you're missing half the point. If you can only win by ruining someone else's fun, I can't call that a victory.

**Tris** · 2013-12-15, 03:02 PM (ISO 8601)

Originally Posted by Ramsus

No, my issue is that the people who made the decision to gang up on me and decide I don't get to play don't care at all that this ruined the fun for someone and that most likely, if past experience tells me anything, nobody is going to even think they did anything wrong or punish them for playing poorly. (I don't mean playing in a meanspirited way, I mean playing in a way that should result in getting you killed.)

You're mistaken if you think that I don't care if you aren't having fun. I had no intention of making things unfun for you and had no idea that this would upset you so much. I was surprised when you reacted the way you did.

And, do I understand you correctly that you want to have people taken out of the game for playing a certain way?

**Cuthalion** · 2013-12-15, 03:58 PM (ISO 8601)

Originally Posted by Ramsus

Well, have fun being the new easiest target. Super lots of fun having everyone gang up against you. Yup. That's certainly the most fun way to play a game that's supposed to be about paranoia, backstabbing, intrigue, and never knowing when you're safe and when you aren't. Yuuuuuuuuuuuuuuup.

Btw "I wasn't part of the alliance" & "they PMed me and I continued to do it another night in a row" clash. You took part means you took part whether you signed up for the official alliance of anti-fun newsletter or not.

If all you care about is the "best" way to win then you're missing half the point. If you can only win by ruining someone else's fun, I can't call that a victory.

No, they PM'ed me last night. This one.

**Ramsus** · 2013-12-15, 04:42 PM (ISO 8601)

Originally Posted by Tanar Aerdoth

And, do I understand you correctly that you want to have people taken out of the game for playing a certain way?

By the other players. As ruining someone's fun by having multiple people ganging up on one repeatedly should be punished (if for no better reason so that the other players don't have to worry about the same happening to them at a later point and can play games without the fear that people will arbitrarily just decide that they are not allowed to even play games, let alone have a shot at winning them). Also because making an obvious alliance should be, as I've stated a couple times already, seen as a threat to everyone else. And then there'd just be the karma aspect. You guys decided I'm not allowed to play, other people giving you the same treatment would be no less than you deserve. No worries though, I've yet to ever see any group of people on the internet do the right thing when they can instead ignore everything that doesn't directly involved them, even when this means they have to in fact play unwisely in order to pretend they don't see anything. So carry on playing games like this and telling people they aren't allowed to even play with you, I just won't be joining games where people get treated thus, as I actually want to get a chance to play games when I sign up for them.

@Cuthalion: I don't really care which day you got the PM. You did it twice in a row knowing they were going to do so again as well. It doesn't matter to me the degree in which you formally teamed up with them or not, only that you decided to continue participating in that behavior. To make an analogy, if you see a bunch of bullies knock a kid around and then come up and kick him while he's on the ground, that doesn't make you not a bully just because you weren't a part of the initial group.

Edit: Anyway, I'm going to stop responding to things on this topic as Penguinator's already said something and no matter how many justifications and excuses you guys make it doesn't change the fact that you robbed me of the chance to play the game.

**Sabeki** · 2013-12-15, 05:02 PM (ISO 8601)

Edited out post by request.

Meh, I'll stick out of it tonight and not vote for any of the parties.

**Ramsus** · 2013-12-15, 05:05 PM (ISO 8601)

Sabeki, you may want to re-read the forum rules. Throwing "sarcasm" tags around insults doesn't actually help you circumvent rule violations.

**Penguinator** · 2013-12-15, 08:38 PM (ISO 8601)

Guys, if you're going to keep on this topic, then do it through PMs.

**D20ragon** · 2013-12-15, 08:42 PM (ISO 8601)

Couldn't have said it better.

Anyway! I, myself, am really enjoying my first circle of assassins game

**Yumori Zatsuken** · 2013-12-15, 11:31 PM (ISO 8601)

I'm going out of this alliance, that they have. It's not helping me in killing Nobody. I won't. I certainly won't.
P, he thougt it was for the best, and now will not target Alice any further.

(I did this because I realized I was destroying fun, but please, don't continue this further.)

**Szilard** · 2013-12-16, 12:49 AM (ISO 8601)

Aslan wakes up from his 20 hour nap (since that's what lions do).

"The hell's been going on?"

**Penguinator** · 2013-12-17, 08:39 PM (ISO 8601)

Day 5:

Spoiler: The Jabberwock, The Keyrat, Alice 2.8, The Kitten

Show

Twas brillig, and the slithy grock
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe.
And the franuptious Jabberwock
Did grodunk past the Ace of Spabe.

He knew the card worked with the bot.
Together, they had killed a lot.
And, Prince of Gossip, Keyrat, too,
Winkling frendzis borking knew.

Alice, friving kribble-rok,
Had laid a trap, aloo-alok.
For Kitten; Drink Me - good membrink -
But The Kitten did not drink.

Alice shook a robot fist,
And saw graninging foron ryst.
The Keyrat and the Jabberwock.
She turned to them with look of shock.

"You've come," she grappered, wingling dreeve,
"But I've an Ace inside my sleeve."
The Jabberwock, he grinkled dor,
"The Ace of Spades, he is no more."

"Dead, he is, by mine own hand."
He shook his head. "You'll understand.
Like predecessor, we'll all die.
So that Queen may live. But why?"

Keyrat spoke nary a word,
Which, for him, was quite absurd.
The Jabberwock, he shook his head.
A moment more, Alice is Dead.

Spoiler: ???

Show

Erstwhile, The Walrus, 83,
Looked for somewhere else to be
His files arranged, he looked for work.
Then, a voice. His head did jerk.

"Subject 1, eliminated.
Message redacted, terminated."
The Walrus only shook his head.
The truth was here: Alice was Dead.

Spoiler: The Kitten, The Walrus, The Masked Panda

Show

The animals ran in, only to find the broken body of Alice 2.8. The Kitten had with him a set of flashcards, and the Walrus carried a lanyard from Sidney Land. The Masked Panda looked at the ground for a while, then crossed his arms. "I'm going out of this alliance, that they have. It's not helping me in killing Nobody. I won't. I certainly won't."
The others looked at him incredulously. Nobody had been dead for a long time.
He tipped his hat, and dashed a fistful of pepper in the Walrus's face, then disappeared.
The Walrus coughed, but did not expire. This was the second time in two days someone had attacked him with pepper. Odd.

Spoiler: The Gardener, Lady Lexington, The Hat, The Ace of Hearts, The Keyrat

Show

The Gardener had opted to join Lady Lexington for tea. He was still grumbling about the Hat's intrusion into his house. "Tried to get me to do his taxes for him, he did."
The Hat suddenly appeared with its tax form, hovering around the Lady. After a moment of sipping her tea, she waved it away. "I haven't done taxes in ages."
The Hat looked downtrodden, but began to float away.
"See? Just like that."
A few feet away, the Ace of Hearts began chasing after The Hat.
"Wait, Hat!
I think that
You should help me
Do my taxes!"
...Damn. That didn't rhyme.
The Keyrat wandered by, and the tea party beckoned him over.
The Lady sipped her tea, nodding towards the Keyrat. "So, Keyrat. Where are you from? Not around here?"
The Keyrat shook his head. "Oh, no, I came from just nearby. In fact, it's about thirty-two kilometers from this very spot. Thirty-two point eight, in fact. Very close by. Nice little hole, in a hill. Hole in a hill, we used to call it. Had some trouble with hedgehogs, though. Always trying to get into the hole. Thought we were some croquet parlor, no doubt. Have you ever tried to play croquet? I tried it once, but the flamingo was much too big for poor little me. I could barely get my fingers around its beak, only to be told that I was holding it the wrong way. Well, after that, I just gave up and kicked the ball, only for the spiky end to hurt my poor foot. So I went to the doctor's, and he said..."
The Gardener cut him off. "Sorry we only have tea. I bet you'd rather have a nice Drink Me bottle."
The Keyrat shook his head furiously. "Oh, no. Those things have ratspartame. Haven't you heard? That stuff is terribly bad for you. They say it will make you lose weight like never before, but really, it's just transferring the weight to other places. They say that ratspartame will kill your family, your loved ones, and your wallet. It's an evil, evil thing that will take over your life. It gives you ulcers and premature balding. It will make the numbers fall off of your cards, and your roses turn white with fear. And once you build a dependency, you can keep running and running, but only be staying in place. Did you know..."

Spoiler: The Masked Panda, The Nearly Invisible Man

Show

The Masked Panda was busy slinking in the shadows. Wasn't good to be prowling about after turning against the animals like that. Suddenly, he heard a voice.
"So. Can I ask you something?"
The Panda was surprised. He didn't think anyone had seen him, and he couldn't see anyone.
"Yes, I can see you. I have quite a lot of experience with remaining undetected. My question?"
"...Ask."
"What's your middle name?"
"V."
"V? As in the letter? Is it short for something?"
"No."
"Are you embarrassed that you don't have a full middle name?"
"No."
"Very well, then. Thanks for your time." With that, The Nearly Invisible Man slipped away.

Spoiler: The Jabberwock, Aslan

Show

The Jabberwock, agriff wanear,
Didn't see the lion near.
Who rogglesnock vynilius drig,
A sheet of taxes, quibblirig.

The Jabberwock frinkow baldun
Snibblegorp maringo skrun.
"Taxes, those things aren't for me.
Fiddles Feefing on the sea."

Spoiler: Guesses

Show

Tanar Aerdoth (The Kitten): Why would Alice 2.8 need flashcards to study? She's a robot!
Count Dingdong (The Keyrat): So... are you saying Alice is in league with the Ace of Spades?
Zar Peter (The Nearly Invisible Man): The Masked Panda has an embarassing middle name. I hope so at last.
Cuthalion (The Walrus): Alice ...is actually a double-agent for Director Sidney of Walt.
Lex-Kat (Lady Lexington): I'll go after this mysterious Michigander. Is it perhaps Keyrat?
Yumori123 (The Masked Panda): The Walrus is allergic to pepper
bladescape (The Jabberwock): Ramsus is in league with the Ace of Spades.
Szilard (Aslan): The Jabberwock is the Queen's best accountant.
Ramsus (Alice 2.8): My guess is that the Kitten ...is addicted to Drink Me bottles.
DarkLightDragon (The Gardener): The Keyrat is addicted to drink me bottles.
Sabeki (The Ace of Hearts): I guess that the Hat is the Queens most effiecient accountant.
D20ragon (The Hat): Lexington is the queens most efficient accountant.

Spoiler: Characters/Secrets

Show

The Walrus, Number π
The Masked Panda, Number 16
The Keyrat, Number 183-O
The Nearly Invisible Man, Number 029
The Ace of Hearts, Number O-19
The Kitten, Number 23-T23
Aslan, Number 867-5309
Lexington Scallion, Mistress of Misdirectionism, Number X¹³ + Y⁷
The Jabberwock, Number 1872
The Gardener, Number 211
The Hat, Number umpteen

...is the Queen's most efficient accountant.
...is allergic to pepper.
...was born in Michigan, USA.
...is addicted to Drink Me bottles.
...counted to 6,000,000. TWICE.
...is actually a double-agent for Director Sidney of Walt.
...is really the Mad Hatter in disguise.
...has an embarrassing middle name.
...is being manipulated by the Jabberwock.
...doesn't make flashcards when studying.
...is involved in a plot to kill the Queen.

Spoiler: Player List

Show

{table=title]Player|Character|Number|Secret|Fate|Points
Cuthalion|The Walrus|π|||
Yumori123|The Masked Panda|16|||
Count Dingdong|Keyrat|183-O|||

0.5

Zar Peter|The Nearly Invisible Man|029|||
Sabeki|The Ace of Hearts|O-19|||
tman2nd|The Kitten|23-T23|||
Szilard|Aslan|867-5309|||
Lex-Kat|Lexington Scallion, Mistress of Misdirectionism|X¹³ + Y⁷|||
bladescape|The Jabberwock|1872|||

0.5

DarkLightDragon|The Gardener|211|||
D20Ragon|The Hat|umpteen|||
Ramsus|Alice 2.8|1|In League with the Ace of Spades|Day 5|

2

0

0

[/table]

Day 6 begins. Please post your guesses in your QTs. It will end in 72 hours or once all guesses have been received.

When you make your guesses, please say (Character Name) is (Guess) instead of (Player Name) is (Guess). It's easier for me.

**Tris** · 2013-12-17, 09:01 PM (ISO 8601)

The Kitten looks upon Alice 2.8 now dead like her name sake. He nods at the Masked Panda's words and walks away. There is, indeed, no need for an alliance any more. From now on I treat them all as my enemy once more. As the queen has commanded, I must do. They will all be eliminated. So, the Kitten slinks of into the nearby forest.

**Penguinator** · 2013-12-19, 12:55 PM (ISO 8601)

It's been more than 40 hours, and I've received less than half of the guesses.

**Penguinator** · 2013-12-22, 01:36 AM (ISO 8601)

Day 6:

Spoiler: The Jabberwock, The Kitten

Show

In twingly breebling nodal clocks,
Entered did the Jabberwock,
Following The Kitten brepur,
He threw at the cat some pepper.

The Kitten turned but didn't sneeze,
Fleefing kraquor snuffletrees.
He looked at yonder Jabberwock.
Did Mister Lex bradinglebrock?

The Jabberwock vyxani kloh,
Lexington, a Mister? No.
"The Lady doesn't work for me,
Fiddles feefing on the sea."

Spoiler: The Keyrat, Lady Lexington, The Gardener

Show

The tea party continued from where it last left off.
The Keyrat continued, "Did you know that ratspartame is, in fact, made from mice? Yes, I heard it myself. Not ratspartame at all, really. It's misleading. Just like its labeling. Libel, more like. Terrible stuff, libel. I mean, just the other day..."
The Lady leaned over to the Gardener, ignoring the Keyrat's continued conversation. "Where are you from, Gardener?"
The Gardener shook his head. "Hither and Yon. Not too far from here, actually. Next Queendom over." He paused a moment, then looked to the Keyrat. "Dare I ask how high you can count?"
The Keyrat nodded. "One two three four five six seven eight nine ten..."
The Gardener sighed. This was going to be a while.
"Eleventeen."
"What?"
"That's what comes next, isn't it?"
"Umm... I don't think that's really a number."
"Oh. On that note..." The Keyrat left, embarrassed.

Spoiler: The Keyrat, The Nearly Invisible Man, Aslan

Show

The Keyrat made his way over to the Nearly Invisible Man. "Can you teach me to count?"
"Excuse me?" The Nearly Invisible Man was surprised anyone had seen him to begin with.
"Well, you're the Queen's most efficient accountant, right?"
The Nearly Invisible Man's hat fell off his head. He stooped to pick it up. "Um... yes."
"Then can you teach me?"
Aslan appeared, glaring steadily.
"...Right after I finish doing the lion's taxes."

Spoiler: The Nearly Invisible Man

Show

The Nearly Invisible Man
Reading intensely as he can.
In the Queen's accounts, no luck,
No middle name listed for Jabberwock.

Spoiler: ???

Show

The Walrus heard the voice arise,
"Removed from play: Agent 029."
He nodded his head and set to task.
How long would this charade last?

Spoiler: The Walrus, The Masked Panda, The Hat, The Ace of Hearts

Show

The Walrus wandered around, several assassins making their way towards him.
The Masked Panda appeared, shoving a pamphlet from Detroit under his nose. The Walrus shook his head.
The Hat arose, revealing a tap-dancing Florida Q. Toad under himself. The Walrus shook his head.
The Ace of Hearts threw pepper at the Walrus. The Walrus turned to face him, revealing that he had been wearing a gas mask. Considering he'd been attacked with pepper every day, he'd grown used to it. He ooked a little, and the Ace shook his head.
"I've told you once and I'll tell you again.
I'm only a card. I can't count past ten."

Spoiler: Guesses

Show

Tanar Aerdoth (The Kitten): I think that Lexington is being manipulated by the Jabberwock. Will these manipulations lead to her DOOM?
Count Dingdong (The Keyrat): The Nearly Invisible Man is rather good! In fact, he's probably the Queen's most efficient accountant!
bladescape (The Jabberwock): The Kitten is Allergic to pepper.
Zar Peter (The Nearly Invisible Man): The Jabberwock must have an embarrassing middle name. I think I read it once. In the accounts of the queen of hearts of course :)
Szilard (Aslan): The Nearly Invisible Man is the Queen's Best Accountant.
Yumori123 (The Masked Panda): The Walrus, is clearly the Michigander. Michigan has a nickname, Winter Wonderland,we know that Walrus is a winter type of animal.
Lex-Kat (Lady Lexington): I'm prepared to guess that The Gardener was Born in Michigan, U.S.A..
D20ragon (The Hat): The walrus's master is Sidney of Walt.
Sabeki (The Ace of Hearts): I guess the walrus is allergic to pepper.
DarkLightDragon (The Gardener): Keyrat counted to 6mil twice?
Cuthalion (The Walrus): The Ace of Hearts counted to 6k twice.

Spoiler: Characters/Secrets

Show

The Walrus, Number π
The Masked Panda, Number 16
The Keyrat, Number 183-O
The Ace of Hearts, Number O-19
The Kitten, Number 23-T23
Aslan, Number 867-5309
Lexington Scallion, Mistress of Misdirectionism, Number X¹³ + Y⁷
The Jabberwock, Number 1872
The Gardener, Number 211
The Hat, Number umpteen

...is allergic to pepper.
...was born in Michigan, USA.
...is addicted to Drink Me bottles.
...counted to 6,000,000. TWICE.
...is actually a double-agent for Director Sidney of Walt.
...is really the Mad Hatter in disguise.
...has an embarrassing middle name.
...is being manipulated by the Jabberwock.
...doesn't make flashcards when studying.
...is involved in a plot to kill the Queen.

Spoiler: Player List

Show

{table=title]Player|Character|Number|Secret|Fate|Points
Cuthalion|The Walrus|π|||
Yumori123|The Masked Panda|16|||
Count Dingdong|Keyrat|183-O|||

1

Sabeki|The Ace of Hearts|O-19|||
tman2nd|The Kitten|23-T23|||
Szilard|Aslan|867-5309|||

0.5

Lex-Kat|Lexington Scallion, Mistress of Misdirectionism|X¹³ + Y⁷|||
bladescape|The Jabberwock|1872|||

0.5

DarkLightDragon|The Gardener|211|||
D20Ragon|The Hat|umpteen|||
Zar Peter|The Nearly Invisible Man|029|Queen's Most Efficient Accountant|Day 6|

0

2

0

0

[/table]

Day 7 begins. Please post your guesses in your QTs. It will end in 72 hours or once all guesses have been received.

**Tris** · 2013-12-22, 02:59 AM (ISO 8601)

Oh, it's not Lexington? He must be manipulating someone else then. But, who?

**D20ragon** · 2013-12-22, 08:32 AM (ISO 8601)

The hat was miffed. In a huff, it pulled out a shotgun, and vaporized the frog, stopping its silly dance.

It floated away, humming a tune.

**DarkLightDragon** · 2013-12-23, 04:58 AM (ISO 8601)

The Gardener sniffs at the obnoxious little Keyrat and returns to his tea with Lexington...

**Penguinator** · 2013-12-23, 07:21 PM (ISO 8601)

Still missing a few guesses. I've seen some of you on the forum, so I'm not sure what you're waiting for. The faster you send me guesses, the faster I can make things happen.

Getting sick of waiting for the same people again and again.

Count Dingdong · 2013-12-23, 08:53 PM (ISO 8601)

The Keyrat paused in his scurrying to worry about something. Well, his worrying happens often, but often it's of simpler things, such as which cheese is the best and who the Dormouse really is.

"Everyone has a middle name, right? Yes! Of course they do! After all, after the front comes the middle, and that's before they end, so everyone must have a front, middle, and end name, right? I hear some people find theirs embarrassing, but I couldn't think why. I mean, I've yet to find mine! Hmm... what's a good one... a.. b.. c.. d.. e.. E! Yes, E. An E-name, hmm... Eenie, meenie, miney, mock, catch a jabber in a wok, he'll not holler, he's the best, now's the time to get some rest- what was I doing again? Esther! Yes! That's a good middle name! Call me Esther from now on..."

And Esther went on to resume his scurrying. Well, he was the Keyrat, and he'll probably be another when he ends.

**Szilard** · 2013-12-24, 08:58 PM (ISO 8601)

Father Christmas stops by from Narnia to give Aslan his christmas gift. "Ho ho ho!" And off he goes!

((Merry Christmas everyone! ... Well, to those of you that are into that sort of thing. Happy Hannukah/Kwanza/Holidays/whatever doesn't offend you otherwise.

))

**Penguinator** · 2013-12-25, 01:41 AM (ISO 8601)

Day 7:

Spoiler: The Keyrat, The Ace of Hearts

Show

The Keyrat paused in his scurrying to worry about something. Well, his worrying happens often, but often it's of simpler things, such as which cheese is the best and who the Dormouse really is."Everyone has a middle name, right? Yes! Of course they do! After all, after the front comes the middle, and that's before they end, so everyone must have a front, middle, and end name, right? I hear some people find theirs embarrassing, but I couldn't think why. I mean, I've yet to find mine! Hmm... what's a good one... a.. b.. c.. d.. e.. E! Yes, E. An E-name, hmm... Eenie, meenie, miney, mock, catch a jabber in a wok, he'll not holler, he's the best, now's the time to get some rest- what was I doing again? Esther! Yes! That's a good middle name! Call me Esther from now on..."
And Esther went on to resume his scurrying.
Suddenly, the Ace of Hearts came by. Esther looked at him. "You, your middle name. It's of. Isn't that embarrassing? Dreadfully so. Whose parents name their child 'of?' 'Of' what? Maybe it's short for something. It's almost as bad as 'Oz.' Same first letter and everything. Why, I'll bet those ruby slippers you're wearing are from that place, too..."
The Ace of Hearts glared, but said nothing.

Spoiler: The Walrus, The Masked Panda, Lady Lexington, The Gardener

Show

The Walrus wandered around, his mask at the ready. He could never be sure who was going to throw pepper at him next. Suddenly, The Masked Panda appeared behind him. "Tell me, Walrus. How high can you count?"
"Ook! Ook, oOk, ooK!"*
*I can't speak English, do you really think I can count?
He turned to look at The Masked Panda, but the cloaked animal had disappeared as quickly as he had come.
The Walrus continued on his way, heading towards Lady Lexington's tea party. He pointed at the Lady, shouting, "ook, ok, ko, ook, Ook!"*
*Hey, Lady, I hear you're working with the Ace of Spades!
The Lady barely looked up from her tea. "Sweetie, that was Alice. Aren't you paying any attention at all?"
The Walrus wandered off, embarrassed.
The Gardener watched The Walrus slink off, then held out a Drink Me bottle to Lexington. "If that awful little rat didn't want it, perhaps you would? I hear it goes great with tea!"
The Lady shook her head. "I'm watching my figure. If you'll excuse me, I must be somewhere." With that, she left, leaving The Gardener wondering what to do with the Drink Me bottle he had spent so much to buy. Didn't do anything for the flowers, that stuff. Shame.

Spoiler: The Walrus, The Jabberwock, The Kitten, The Keyrat

Show

'Twas the night before Christmas and bradinglebrock,
The Walrus was aiding The old Jabberwock.
The Kitten did follow, he knew of the pair
And hoped that The Walrus would fall for a scare.

The Keyrat nreeg cringlud avork inny spen,
In hopes that all pepper avoided his den.
When out on the lawn, garunk werbling vor,
The Keyrat awoke, with a tchetching nikor.

When what to his brovix refut morbly ittun,
But Walrus, The Jabberwock, and The small Kitten.
Their fangs, how they glistened! Their teeth, how they gnashed!
The Walrus lay dead; Kitten gone with a dash.

Jabberwock did not speak, but a twist of his head
Filled the Keyrat with the utmost of dread.
He said not a word, but went straight to his work.
Stuffed the Keyrat with pepper, then turned with a jerk.

He sprang to the woods, dashing into the night.
All evidence showed it had been quite a fight.
But some heard him say as he ran out of sight,
"Oh, frabjous day! Or, O, frabjous night!"

Spoiler: Aslan, The Hat

Show

Aslan appeared at the Keyrat's home for a visit, only to find stockings filled with pepper. "I GUESS HE'S NOT THE HATTER, THEN."
Interestingly enough, one of the stockings was stuffed not with pepper, but with memorabilia from Sidney World. A stuffed Mikey Moose, a Crazy toy, and a Devyn Drake figure. Unfortunately for The Hat, who was hidden in wait, the lion left the scene without touching the trapped toys.

Spoiler: Lady Lexington, The Kitten

Show

Lady Lexington had been keeping tabs on The Kitten. She had been aware of his venture into the woods, and waited for him to return. She drew her umbrella, preparing for an attack.
The Kitten finally arrived, blood in his fangs. He saw the Lady, and shivered. Had she seen what had happened? Without thinking, he leapt...
...And landed on her parasol, paralyzed. The Lady giggled. "Don't worry, it wears off." She lifted him by the scruff of his neck towards her veiled face. "What do you see?"
...It was Michigan. Home. The Kitten began crying. He hadn't seen home in so long, and now he may never see it again.
The Lady giggled. "That's what I thought."
The Kitten was stuffed into a box, and heard a lot of rustling...

Spoiler: The Kitten

Show

"Look, mommy! Santa brought me the kitten I wanted!"
The Kitten was confused, but home. ...It had been too long.

Spoiler: ???

Show

"Special today: Three for one.
Agent Pi has been outdone.
Expired, Agent 183-O.
23-T23 was sent home."

The Walrus just nodded,
A new day to begin.
Three more chances crushed.
No telling who would win.

Spoiler: Guesses

Show

Count Dingdong (The Keyrat): Everyone's middle name seems embarrassing to someone, but the Ace of Hearts' is the worst! I mean, of?
Tanar Aerdoth (The Kitten): Is (The Jabberwock) manipulating the Walrus?
bladescape (The Jabberwock): The Keyrat, I went to see,
To find if he, an allergy,
Hidden beneath that ratty look
Pepper would undo his book.
D20ragon (The Hat): Aslan is controlled by Sir Sidney of Walt.
DarkLightDragon (The Gardener): The Gardener holds out a Drink Me bottle to Lexington. "If that awful little rat didn't want it, perhaps you would? I hear it goes great with tea!"
Yumori123 (The Masked Panda): The Walrus counted to 6,000,000 twice.
Szilard (Aslan): I'll go with the Keyrat is the Mad Hatter.
Cuthalion (The Walrus): Lexington is in league with the Ace.
Lex-Kat (Lady Lexington): Did someone already guess that the Kitten was from Michigan?
Sabeki (The Ace of Hearts): ...

Spoiler: Characters/Secrets

Show

The Masked Panda, Number 16
Aslan, Number 867-5309
Lexington Scallion, Mistress of Misdirectionism, Number X¹³ + Y⁷
The Jabberwock, Number 1872
The Gardener, Number 211
The Hat, Number umpteen

...counted to 6,000,000. TWICE.
...is actually a double-agent for Director Sidney of Walt.
...is really the Mad Hatter in disguise.
...has an embarrassing middle name.
...doesn't make flashcards when studying.
...is involved in a plot to kill the Queen.

Spoiler: Player List

Show

{table=title]Player|Character|Number|Secret|Fate|Points
Yumori123|The Masked Panda|16|||
Szilard|Aslan|867-5309|||

0.5

Lex-Kat|Lexington Scallion, Mistress of Misdirectionism|X¹³ + Y⁷|||

1

bladescape|The Jabberwock|1872|||

1.5

DarkLightDragon|The Gardener|211|||
D20Ragon|The Hat|umpteen|||
Sabeki|The Ace of Hearts|O-19|Addicted to Drink Me bottles|Left Day 8|

0

1

1

0

0

2

0

0

[/table]

Day 8 begins. Please post your guesses in your QTs. It will end in 72-96 hours or once all guesses have been received.

**Penguinator** · 2013-12-26, 05:06 PM (ISO 8601)

Sabeki, The Ace of Hearts, who was Addicted to Drink Me bottles, has opted to leave the game.

Those of you who have already sent me "Addicted to Drink Me bottle" guesses this round may consider switching to something else.

**DarkLightDragon** · 2013-12-27, 04:09 AM (ISO 8601)

The Gardener frowns at Ace's unexpected absence.

"This bottle cost me so much, too. Nevermind, I might be able to use it on some other victim."

He wanders off to water his precious garden, with an extra dose given to the plants struggling to recover from the hat's attack.

**Yumori Zatsuken** · 2013-12-27, 12:08 PM (ISO 8601)

Dammit. He is gone, didn't have the chance, and now, he's not in Wonderland anymore. P is angered, as Nobody left and relocated to Arizona, before he got the chance to kill him.
Back to the Queen's orders, I guess. Kill everyone for now on. Everyone.

**Penguinator** · 2013-12-27, 04:43 PM (ISO 8601)

Day 8:

Spoiler: ???

Show

"The Ace of Hearts,
Drinking on the job.
He shrunk and got taller,
Then was lynched by a mob."

Spoiler: The Gardener, Aslan, The Jabberwock

Show

The Gardener frowns at Ace's unexpected absence.
"This bottle cost me so much, too. Nevermind, I might be able to use it on some other victim."
He wanders off to water his precious garden, with an extra dose given to the plants struggling to recover from the hat's attack.
As the Gardener entered his house, vowing to destroy that nasty double agent.
...Then he remembered the ruthlessness with which The Hat had destroyed anything he had brought from Sidney Land, and realized he couldn't be the double agent.

Suddenly, there were intruders in The Gardener's domain. The Gardener expected his plants to stop them, but instead he heard only laughter. He turned to the window, and saw that Aslan was carrying a large banner, which bore... his middle name. That filthy name he had been given, the one he had tried to hide for years. He ran outside, shrieking at his plants. "Stop laughing! Stop him! Stop everything!"
But no sooner had the Jabberwock
Borflinking droongle buddexock.
"I didn't know Marion was a man's name."
"It ain't," said the Gardener, who crumpled in pain.

Spoiler: ???

Show

"Poor old Marion is dead,
He let his name get to his head.
That's 211 and O-19
Gone; no more will they be seen."

Spoiler: Aslan, The Masked Panda

Show

Aslan was parading around, celebrating his victory over the Gardener. Suddenly, someone appeared, whispering in his ear. "I hear you're a double-agent."
Aslan turned, fuming. "ASLAN WORKS FOR NO MAN!" But before he could see who had spoken, they were gone.

Spoiler: The Hat, The Jabberwock

Show

'Twas brillyg, and the slinky greeps
Did florp and grimbow like a cat.
One creature, one who never sleeps,
Stalked the Jabberwock: The Hat.

Beware the Jabberwock, dear Hat!
The jaws that rip up old headgear!
Beware the Jubjub birdies that
Sing too high for most to hear!

He took his vorpal sword in hand,
At least, he would, if he had one.
Instead, it oer'float the land,
Above the bandersnatch to shun.

And, as in grinkish fly he flew,
The Jabberwock, nodded in peace,
Came into the Hat's... er, view.
Listening to Jubjub ersneese.

One, two! Buckle my shoe!
The vorpal sword went snicker-snack!
Watch that, Buckle my hat,
The Hatter came under attack.

And has thou slain the Jabberwock?
Or was it Hatter, after all?
O frabjous Hat! Callooh, Callat!
It doesn't matter, they all fall.

Spoiler: ???

Show

"And now, 1872,
What on earth did Hatter do?
To look like such a frightening beast
Before the man became deceased?"

Spoiler: Guesses

Show

bladescape (The Jabberwock):
The Gard'ner, oh funny man he,
Oh, he couldn't possibly be,
The man who would rather not know,
What middle name he has to show?

Curious questions plague me around,
Fliggleborn muses. tis quite a sound.
Flumping along as I coljay my way,
I cannot but wonder, what will he say?
Lex-Kat (Lady Lexington): Obviously the Gardner is really the Mad Hatter in disguise!
Yumori123 (The Masked Panda): Aslan is actually a double agent.
Szilard (Aslan): By jove, the Gardener has an embarrassing middle name!
DarkLightDragon (The Gardener): The Hat is actually a double-agent for Director Sidney of Walt.
D20ragon (The Hat): The jabberwock is in actuality the hatter.

Spoiler: Characters/Secrets

Show

The Masked Panda, Number 16
Aslan, Number 867-5309
Lexington Scallion, Mistress of Misdirectionism, Number X¹³ + Y⁷
The Hat, Number umpteen

...counted to 6,000,000. TWICE.
...is actually a double-agent for Director Sidney of Walt.
...doesn't make flashcards when studying.
...is involved in a plot to kill the Queen.

Spoiler: Player List

Show

{table=title]Player|Character|Number|Secret|Fate|Points
Yumori123|The Masked Panda|16|||
Szilard|Aslan|867-5309|||

1

Lex-Kat|Lexington Scallion, Mistress of Misdirectionism|X¹³ + Y⁷|||

1

D20Ragon|The Hat|umpteen|||

1

2

0

0

1

1

0

0

2

0

0

[/table]

Day 9 begins. Please post your guesses in your QTs. It will end in 72-96 hours or once all guesses have been received.

**DarkLightDragon** · 2013-12-28, 02:35 AM (ISO 8601)

I'm amazed I lived that long with how popular my secret was.

**Penguinator** · 2014-01-02, 04:04 AM (ISO 8601)

Final Day:

Spoiler: The Hat, Lady Lexington, Aslan, The Masked Panda

Show

The Hat was uneasy. Most of The Queen's guard had fallen, but would it be enough to create an opening? According to his co-conspirators, the time to enact the plan was now. Known only as the Knave of Hearts operation, several agents had been plotting for years to bring down The Queen. The Hat had joined after the jailing and subsequent disappearance of his old partner The Mad Hatter. He began towards the throne room, past a long hallway of animalistic statues. They looked almost real, in fact. But the most striking thing about the chamber was hardly the statues.
No, for Lady Lexington was standing, parasol drawn, waiting. "I can't let you kill The Queen. I know what you're up to, Hat."
The Hat began to draw a weapon when one of the "statues" tore into the Lady's side, dropping her to the floor. Aslan spoke in his booming voice, "WHAT DO YOU CARE IF THE QUEEN OF HEARTS IS DEAD, TRAITOR? YOU HAVE BEEN WORKING FOR DIRECTOR WALT THIS WHOLE TIME." The Lady kicked the lion off of her, thrusting her parasol at him. He dodged, pawing at her unseen face. She blocked it with the parasol, but his other paw connected. The Lady staggered back, and Aslan took the opportunity to pounce.
...Only to find nothing. The Lady's clothes dropped slowly to the floor, leaving no trace of a person having worn them only moments before.
Aslan looked confused, but shook his head. "NO MATTER. I CANNOT ALLOW YOU TO KILL THE QUEEN." He advanced toward The Hat, then turned when he heard a sinister laugh.
"Hello, lion. I've discovered your weakness."
"DON'T BE A FOOL. THERE ARE NO FLASHCARDS IN WONDERLAND."
"Oh, but there are. The Queen has his own special Flash guard. Cards!"
Suddenly, dozens of soldiers with facts written on them advanced on the lion. He fought valiantly, but to no avail. The numbers, pun intended, were too much for him.
The Masked Panda laughed giddily from his perch above the battle. Back to the Queen's orders, I guess. Kill everyone from now on. Everyone. He turned to The Hat, but it had escaped in the madness.
The Hat charged towards The Queen's throne room, flamethrower drawn. The Queen would burn. It was finally time, and nothing would stop him. He was surprised that The Panda had been able to withstand the flashcards, but no matter. It was done. The doors opened; The Hat dashed madly towards The Queen. There he was! There...
"Going somewhere?"
The voice was sickeningly sweet, and came from seemingly nowhere. In moments, The Hat had been torn to pieces with knives. The flamethrower clattered to the floor, useless.
The Queen of Hearts applauded. "Very good, very good. Come forward, Panda."
The Masked Panda nodded, then approached The Queen's thrown. Making a sweeping motion, he bowed. Before The Queen could register what had happened, he realized that the Panda had thrown a dagger into his chest. "What... have... you... done?!"
"I've only followed your orders, you sick, twisted man. I've killed everyone. ...Everyone."
The Queen gurgled, slumping into the throne. The Panda only walked back out of the throne room, tipping his hat.

Spoiler: ???

Show

The Masked Panda arrived in the secret room where The Walrus was waiting. "It is done?"
"It is done."
"Good. Pity about The Hat, but you did what you had to, for the cause. The operation was a success."
"I could care less. My reward?"
"Ah, yes. The bamboo. There."
The Walrus pressed a button, and the wall opened, revealing a pile of bamboo bigger than anyone could ever care for.
"You've counted it?"
"All six million stalks. ...In fact, we checked it twice."
"Good."

Spoiler

Show

Yumori123 (The Masked Panda) has won!

bladescape and Szilard actually had the most kills, with one kill and two assists each.

They tied with Ramsus and Lex-Kat for most points.

Spoiler: Guesses

Show

Szilard (Aslan): The Lady Lexington doth protest too much, for she's the agent of doubleness.
Yumori123 (The Masked Panda): Aslan doesn't make flashcards when studying.
Lex-Kat (Lady Lexington): D20Ragon is Involved in a Plot to Kill the Queen.
D20ragon (The Hat): The panda has no need for flashcards.

Spoiler: Player List

Show

{table=title]Player|Character|Number|Secret|Fate|Points
Yumori123|The Masked Panda|16|Counted to 6,000,000. Twice.|Won!|

1

2

2

1

2

0

0

1

1

0

0

2

0

0

[/table]

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