Funny stories on unorthodox uses of spells

[Scalenex]

I got two stories both from 2nd edition. Bonus points if the story involves a very low level spell doing something very powerful. If you want to include spells that are in and of themselves whacky (like my two favorites Waterball and Scalenex's Screaming Chickens of Doom, that probably belongs in it's own thread).

Paladin uses her Ring of the Ram to knock a scroll out of the hand of an evil cleric she was fighting, then her illusionist directed one of the rats he summoned with Monster Summoning I to pick up the scroll and run off with it depriving the cleric of the scroll of his most potent spells for the rest of the battle and leading one of his minions on a hilarious wild goose chase.

Town is being attacked by various subterean monsters from the sewers, the PCs have been trying to kill the monsters we can find. An evil human who we suspect is aligned with dark powers is accusing us of causing the problem in front of a large mob and do to either a Suggestion spell or superior Charisma, he is doing a better job winning them over than us. All of us are first level. My gnome illusionist casts Phantasmal Force (functionally the same spell as Silent Image in 3rd ed) to make it appear like he was expelling poisonous gas when he spoke. This dispersed the mob letting us avoid entangling with innocent people. He also then showed demonic traits and attacked us giving us a legitimate reason to gang beat him to death.

Let's see what you guys have. The potential for funny stories on Grease alone is astronomical.

[enderrocksonall]

In our current campaign we had a full plate armored favored soul bull rushed into a lake by a giant croc. needless to say this was a situation that had no happy ending and needed a quick save. In the same round, an enemy ranger steps out onto the ledge of a shear cliff about 100' above us, where we were ideally trying to go. the party wizard looks from one to the other and says, "BALEFUL TELEPORT". the enemy ranger fails his save and immediately switches places with the favored soul and is promptly eaten by the aforementioned croc.

Before that, we encountered a half-fiendish minotaur who was literally going to tear us apart. he steps in through the door into the hallway we were crowded into. we notice while he passes through the door he needs to use the squeezing rules which causes a light bulb to go on over our heads.
Our party wizard casts enlarge person on this guy who willingly fails his save and now has to use the squeezing rules to move normally through the hallway itself. not only that, but he became too large to squeeze through either of the doors, so we were able to retreat to a previous room and finish him off with regular bows and arrows.

[Thomas]

I don't know about teleporting people into water, but using enlarge person on a monstrous humanoid definitely isn't quite within the rules.

[SDF]

My 1st level party of a rogue, warforged fighter with armor spikes, and a sorcerer(me) is walking down a hall when we have to make will saves. The rogue and I make it but the fighter fails and stands frozen as he blocks the way in front for both of us. A mummy starts to come closer to us as the rogue manages to light it on fire with a lamp, but knocks the warforged on his back. The mummy then runs at us as I presdigitate a banana peel under his foot causing him to trip and impale himself on the warforged's spikes until he burns to death.

[Dervag]

The best I can come up with is the time that the merchantman our party had chartered was attacked by two pirate ships. My wizard took out the larger of the two ships by casting passwall on it... at the waterline.

But that's practically a standard use of the spell, so I don't know if it counts.

[Kesnit]

In a 2.0 game, the party was fighting a high-level vampire. The Bard and Ranger were killed, leaving the Paladin (me) and a Wizard. The vampire has cast a ton of Stoneskins on himself, so every time I hit it, it did no damage and just removed 1 Stoneskin.

The Wizard cast Disintergate on the mortar in the celing above the vampire, causing all the rocks to land on him and remove the Stoneskins.

After I forced him back to his coffin, we staked him using a broken broom.

[enderrocksonall]

I don't know about teleporting people into water, but using enlarge person on a monstrous humanoid definitely isn't quite within the rules.

Actaully the spell specifies that it can be used on any "humanoid creature" so it is quite within the rules, although if you were arguing that as an outsider we couldn't do it I think you'd be right. From what i have heard about the wording of the baleful teleport, the two creatures have to be connected in some way and we argued that the favored soul was touching the shore of the lake. we got the DM to rule it in as long as we dont try anything involving the use of fly and baleful teleport,

[Rigeld2]

Actaully the spell specifies that it can be used on any "humanoid creature" so it is quite within the rules, although if you were arguing that as an outsider we couldn't do it I think you'd be right. From what i have heard about the wording of the baleful teleport, the two creatures have to be connected in some way and we argued that the favored soul was touching the shore of the lake. we got the DM to rule it in as long as we dont try anything involving the use of fly and baleful teleport,

Humanoid != Monstrous Humanoid. Different types mean that Enlarge Person cant work on Monstrous Humanoids.

[enderrocksonall]

Humanoid != Monstrous Humanoid. Different types mean that Enlarge Person cant work on Monstrous Humanoids.

yah but that also means any monstrous humanoid with the wizard class could never use this spell on themselves or their friends, so we tend to ignore little things like that

[Yuki Akuma]

yah but that also means any monstrous humanoid with the wizard class could never use this spell on themselves or their friends, so we tend to ignore little things like that

House rules are all fine and good, but that's still not how the spell works.

A more sensible house rule would be something like "Enlarge Own Type".

[Khantalas]

My cousin once cast a light spell on an orc surrounded with goblins. Well, it was back in AD&D, where a creature was a viable target for a light spell. So, the goblins start running away from the orc because of the light (at least the DM rules so) and the orc starts trying to run away from himself.

That sounded hilarious.

Oh, and someone I know tried to heal a vampire by casting cure light wounds. Does that count?

[enderrocksonall]

Back in 3E we used to have fun casting enlarge on gems, selling them quickly and then running as fast as we could

[Artanis]

In the last campaign I was in (Eberron, level 3ish) was trying to reach a town to warn them of an impending Hobgoblin attack. Along the way, we fought a skirmish against a few goblins in a mountain pass. As we looted the bodies, we realized that, with a rock wall on one side and a sheer drop on the other, it would make an awesome place for an ambush.

Quickly drawing up a plan that resembled something out of a Wile E. Coyote cartoon - up to and including the funny-looking schematic, since we were playing in OpenRPG - we put caltrops and oil across the path, and set my Warmage right at the edge of Orb of Sound range from a giant boulder. Hobgoblins' advance guard comes through, pauses to sweep away the caltrops, and BOOM, an Orb of Sound blasts the boulder off-balance, sending it down the hill and knocking a half-dozen Hobgoblins off the cliff.

One Rain of Stone on the confused survivors later, we were on our way.

[Black Hand]

I had a player make good use of the Water Breathing spell when ejected into the airless environment of Wildspace...Besides the elemental protection that he had used to shield himself from heat/cold damage, there was the problem with not breathing. He essentially had cast water breathing on himself and used his waterskins as "Air Bladders" to live long enough to make it to a save spot.

[enderrocksonall]

I just thought of the hilarity/confusion that could ensue from having a reincarnated cleric cast speak with dead upon his old body

[Logic]

Back in 3E we used to have fun casting enlarge on gems, selling them quickly and then running as fast as we could

SMITE EVIL!

[Yuki Akuma]

I just thought of the hilarity/confusion that could ensue from having a reincarnated cleric cast speak with dead upon his old body

Why would it produce confusion? Speak with dead doesn't call back the spirit from the afterlife (no matter what OoTS may tell you). It just uses all the memories stored in the lump of pinkish-grey matter in the corpse's head and lets the corpse speak.

[jlousivy]

So my party has been warped to the 'modern' world... and one of our party members gets tazerd and taken in a van and is about to be driven away. Me (the party wizard) casts mount right in front of the van... And (sorry cat girls) one of our players is really good at physics.. so.... the van actually ramped and barrrel rolled.... we saved our poor ranger.

[Shisumo]

A friend of mine likes to tell the story of a con game he played in once. His low-level party had just lost its fighter to a series of freakishly bad dice rolls, and the DM announced that he didn't think the adventure would able to go forward successfully without the meatshield. My friend, playing the wizard and knowing that only moments in-game had passed since the death, asked if the cleric could heal the corpse; since, at the time, healing spells were necromancy, the DM said okay, curious as to where this was going. "You now have a corpse with no apparent cause of death," announced the DM. My friend said, "Okay. I clap my hands together, rub them twice, shout 'clear' - then cast shocking grasp and put both hands on his chest."

The DM stared, then burst out laughing; one successful save later on the part of the fighter, and he was back in the game...

[Wehrkind]

That is the best use of shocking grasp ever...

My buddie's favorite story was how he ruined a night of playing in 5 minutes with 2 0 level, 1 1st level and 1 second level spell.

Plot: There is a princess locked in a tower, who has some.. thing. You need to get it in, steal it, but don't kill her, and don't get caught. Big elaborate map of castle etc.

Pierce: I cast spider climb, and scurry up the side of the tower.
DM: K.
Pierce: I cast sleep in the room.
Dm: -rolls- ok... the princess falls asleep...
Pierce: I cast Warm hands (whatever the cantrip is for fire) on the metal of the window. I cast Chill touch on the glass. I then make my hand stick to the window, and remove glass.
Dm:.... ugh... uhmmm... I... guess that should work yea...
Pierce: I search for the -thing- and make my escape.
Dm:... Who wants to play Smash Brothers?

[Daracaex]

I haven't done this, but try casting Suggestion on one of your friends and forbid them from saying any commonly used word. Great at parties!

Also, you can try casting spells at surroundings to get past creatures with SR, like if you remove a pillar from the room so that the roof collapses on the creature, instead of merely blasting with what turns out to be an uneffective fireball.

[shaka gl]

Dont know if this is possible rules-wise, but the DM let it happen:

PC1: I open the door.
DM: Make a Fort/Will save (dont remember which)
PC1: Ehm... 12
DM: The rest of you see PC1 slowly convert into stone.
PC2: I cast Rock to Mud on him!
DM: O_o

[clericwithnogod]

One of our casters convinced the DM that the greasy substance from a Grease spell was actual grease and thus flammable. Pratfall pyromania ensued...

[Yuki Akuma]

Dont know if this is possible rules-wise, but the DM let it happen:

PC1: I open the door.
DM: Make a Fort/Will save (dont remember which)
PC1: Ehm... 12
DM: The rest of you see PC1 slowly convert into stone.
PC2: I cast Rock to Mud on him!
DM: O_o

So... PC2 turned PC1 into a puddle of mud?

How's that helpful?

[shaka gl]

The title says funny, not helpful... but PC1 was not a good person...

[Arceliar]

Once my friends and I were playing.. it was a level 13 quest, we had a party of level 10 chars, but figured since we had a few extra guys we might be OK. A party of 5 mercinaries and 7 of some kind of obscure undead wandered in front of us. The party sorc won initiative, followed by the druid. The sorc cast Wall of Fire in the shape of a hemisphere over the undead and merc group, then the druid cast Stone Shape to create a thin stone dome over the wall of fire, essentially creating a pressure cooker.

Moments later, the mercinaries wizard teleported the humans out of the pressure cooker via a dimension door spell.

As the next round began, our sorc Baleful Polymorphed the wizard, evidently the one competent member of their group, into a sheep--which was immediately eaten by the druid's animal companion (a bear). The dwarf fighter charged at the first of the 4 humans, and immediately rolled 2 20's and an 18, cutting the man in half, and cleaving into the next guy. The rogue tumbled past an enemy to flank with the fighter, and succeeded in tripping the enemy. I fired my bow and missed, every shot.

The third round started, and the bear mauled the one uninjured enemy still standing. The fighter got a couple more lucky dice rolls and took out his already-injured target, and the rogue snuck attack a few times until all that was left was the unharmed, tripped level 12 fighter, covered in his allies blood by this point. That was when the sorc's pseudodragon familiar flew over and poisoned him--he rolled a natural 1 on his save and went unconcious, ****ting himself in the process just as the sorc announced to let him live so he could cast Dominate Person.

In a matter of 18 seconds (three rounds) we had taken out 12 enemies, each of CR our level or higher. We turned around to find a small army of shadows and more of that obscure undead I can't remember just standing there. The DM concluded that after such a complete slaughter, we had inspired fear in the undead (as in, they're not really afraid but not stupid enough to get destroyed without reason) and they fled.

The point is, Wall of Fire + Stone Shape = potential for hilarity

[SpiderBrigade]

The point is, Wall of Fire + Stone Shape = potential for hilarity

First of all, wall of fire can't be made into a hemisphere, only a sheet of flame, or a ring. Even if you used the ring, arguing that combining this with Stoneshape creates a..."pressure cooker" is slaughtering catgirls.

The rest of the story is a pretty neat description of a battle where you owned up, but I don't see how it has to do with unorthodox spell use. Doesn't sound like the pressure cooker actually did anything, since they Dimension-Doored out...?

[Golthur]

I had a player make good use of the Water Breathing spell when ejected into the airless environment of Wildspace...Besides the elemental protection that he had used to shield himself from heat/cold damage, there was the problem with not breathing. He essentially had cast water breathing on himself and used his waterskins as "Air Bladders" to live long enough to make it to a save spot.

Very clever. I like it.

Mine involves two casters, back in 1.x. I was playing a mage, and a friend of mine was a cleric. We had both exhausted nearly all of our spells, and the party was on its last legs against a bunch of ogres. The fighter types managed to take down all of them except the last one, but were forced to get the heck out of there.

A quick scan of both of our spell lists revealed absolutely nothing we could use, individually, for offense. So we came up with the idea of simultaneously casting an Otiluke's resilient sphere and a create water. The DM says we could go for it with a Dex check on both of our parts to get the timing right.

Sure enough, we both make the checks, and... glug, glug, ogre in a goldfish bowl.

[Parlik]

This took place back 2nd Edition where stacking was more fun, I played a 8th level wild mage from Tome of Magic, and I decided to cast Nahals' Reckless Dweamor through a window in a castle about 300 feet away.

Now this spell stated that you could try and cast it as any spell in your spellbook, after which you rolled a d100 + your level to see the result, mostly some odd effect took place, however with a high enough roll you got the desired spell.

Now since it said any spells I decided to cast it as itself, mainly to see how the GM would react, he just said ok roll on the table, which I did twice (Since I had cast Hornung's Surge Selector first, which allowed two rolls and then select the best). One of the results was 93 I think, with the added level bonus (8) this became 100+ which reads: Spell takes effect with a 200% increase on damage and area (Basically x3)

Since a random effect had been selected I was allowed to roll one more time to see the effect, I rolled a natural 100 this time, so by now it was x3x3 (=9 back in the old 2nd Edition days). Hence yet another roll was needed to determine the effect; this roll turned out to be a fireball.

So basically I ended up with a 72d6 (8x3x3) fireball with a radius of 270 feet, needless to say there wasn't much castle left afterwards. Also there was a GM threatening to hit me with his guidebook if I ever did it again.

All in all it wasn't that unorthodox, was however quite amusing.

[Just Alex]

Me: I ready an action to counteract the enemy wizard's spell.
DM: OK, well, the wizard is next and he's casting a spell, go ahead and give me you're spellcraft roll
Me: 29
DM: OK, he's casting a Fireball. You going to use Dispel Magic, or do you have a Fireball prepared?
Me: Neither. When he points to his target, I summon a Celestial hawk right in front of his hand.