I need help for a monologue... Tonight! And More.

[dascarletm]

Do you know any good monologues that would be appropriate for an ancient lich who has lived under a city amassing a massive army from the remains for thousands of years?

My players are getting there tonight faster than I planned. Any good ideas? Thanks in advance.

Can be made up yourself or from a movie

[JusticeZero]

Well, what are they trying to do at the time? What's their motives and goals?

[DM Nate]

"Your lich is in a different dungeon."

[dascarletm]

Well, what are they trying to do at the time? What's their motives and goals?

They heard that since the city has sent people with most of their worldly possessions down into this chasm there is a large amount of treasure. Also they hear there is a monster down there that they intend to waken to destroy the city above

[Ravens_cry]

"Ah, come, welcome, young living creatures. There is much in store for you here, my friends, though little to your liking, no doubt. I am afraid I must inform you that the great treasure you sought is nothing more than a rumour I created, and it pleases me it came off so well. There is nothing down here for you but I myself and my army of the dead, or, rather, undead, which I will use to put an end to your hopes, your dreams, and, of course, your miserable existences. Death would have claimed you soon enough any way, no doubt. And now, while I am sure this whole thing has been quite enjoyable little romp, I am afraid it is time for you to die, no doubt. Oh yes, no doubt at all."
<insert dry dusty chuckle here/>

[dascarletm]

"Ah, come, welcome, young living creatures. There is much in store for you here, my friends, though little to your liking, no doubt. I am afraid I must inform you that the great treasure you sought is nothing more than a rumour I created, and it pleases me it came off so well. There is nothing down here for you but I myself and my army of the dead, or, rather, undead, which I will use to put an end to your hopes, your dreams, and, of course, your miserable existences. Death would have claimed you soon enough any way, no doubt. And now, while I am sure this whole thing has been quite enjoyable little romp, I am afraid it is time for you to die, no doubt. Oh yes, no doubt at all."
<insert dry dusty chuckle here/>

this is great I can work with this.

Thank you

[Ravens_cry]

this is great I can work with this.

Thank you

*salute* Glad to help. Not my best work, but happy to be of service.

[Jay R]

"It's time. It's finally time.

For thousands of years I have slowly amassed an army. For thousands of years I have watched the progress of the world. And now my army is finally large enough that I can impose my will on the world. Now, finally, my command will be obeyed. Let the entire world hear my word, and know that to disobey it is to court death. Finally, my ultimate goal will be achieved, and none will dare defy me.

You kids - get off my lawn!"

[Red Fel]

I think I'll quote one of the classics, here.

"Who am I? Wouldn't you like to know. Suffice it to say that I have lived here for a thousand years. I am not the intruder here; it is you who have disturbed my rest! But I have time...

A thousand years... Ten thousand... You will never defeat me...

For wherever evil exists... Mumm-Ra lives... Mumm-Ra lives... Mumm-Ra... LIVES!"

Really, some minor tweaks to that speech and you're good to go. Mumm-Ra was great about hamming it up. Bonus points if you can replicate the cackle, and have Mumm-Ra's theme playing in the background.

[Benthesquid]

Wait, the players are planning to awaken the lich to destroy the city?

Eh, either way.

"What I tell you is true. I am old. When this city was a mere collection of huts on the river, I was ancient. You creatures of flesh and life- you come into the world, live and love and struggle, go down bloody and are buried in the earth. All this in a sparse handful of decades. You are nothing. Your dreams and hates and plans are all nothing. And when you are forgotten dust, blowing in the wind, I shall still be here. Come, then, and look upon inevitability."

[dascarletm]

Wait, the players are planning to awaken the lich to destroy the city?

Eh, either way.

They didn't know what was down there. They assumed (due to rumors) that it was some monster. They concluded that if it was feasting off the remains of the largest city in the area, it would be able to devastate the city. However, they met the lich (who due to the home-brew nature of classes in the campaign) is a warlock. They currently knocked him into a large pit containing a massive amount of reanimated corpses, and (since he doesn't have spider-climb or fly) the only way out is to unleash the horde. They will need to escape (finding a new way out as their entry way is now collapsed) while avoiding the massive tide of zombies.


However, The lich's purpose was actually to constantly make appeasements to a Lovecraftian beast that lurks even deeper. Anyone have any suggestions on appropriate monsters? Or perhaps leaving it unstated would be more appropriate. This is DnD 3.5 though.

[JusticeZero]

Hard to say. The issue with anything "Lovecraftian" in D&D is that it gets hard to do cosmic horror when your party can go three rounds with the horrors.
Plus, by definition, the appeasements aren't going to have meant what anyone thought; if the horror actually recognizes what the city is doing on its behalf and cares, it isn't Lovecraftian. That won't stop the city from doing it, of course, but a Lovecraftian style horror won't really notice or care about the effort, and is busy doing something completely unrelated to absolutely anything that relates to any of the people in the city, or the world for that matter. Which might even make perfect sense and be easy to explain if you were at that level, but it's ridiculously above your head; the people in the city are like a nest of ants which has all sorts of interesting fantasy stuff going on in it, and a horror is like a Big&Large executive in charge of the state operations sorting out real estate deals. Completely unrelated story, but things the executive does might affect the ants in a huge way. Real estate agents don't take bribes from ants.