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  1. - Top - End - #1
    Troll in the Playground
     
    Neon Knight's Avatar

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    Default [Prc Class]There will be no retreat!

    When times are grim, when men's courage fails, desperate measures are required. In such black times, certain men are appointed to lead the counter charge in a last desperate attempt to hold the line. Armed with bravery, courage, intimidation, and authority, these beings are the thin line between a unit of demoralized men crushing their foes and breaking and running away. Always making sure that they will have the will, no matter how imposed, to take one step forward...

    Commissar
    Hit Dice: D8
    {table=head]Level|Base Attack Bonus|Fort Save|Ref Save|Will Save|Special

    1st|
    +0
    |
    +0
    |
    +0
    |
    +2
    |Commissariat Authority, Commissariat Fighting Style

    2nd|
    +1
    |
    +0
    |
    +0
    |
    +3
    |Execution Fighting Style, Field Execution

    3rd|
    +2
    |
    +1
    |
    +1
    |
    +3
    |Fear Me, But Follow!, Commissar's Aide

    4th|
    +3
    |
    +1
    |
    +1
    |
    +4
    |Superior Execution Style

    5th|
    +4
    |
    +1
    |
    +1
    |
    +4
    |Do You Want to Live Forever?

    6th|
    +5
    |
    +2
    |
    +2
    |
    +5
    | Supreme Execution Style

    7th|
    +6
    |
    +2
    |
    +2
    |
    +5
    |Insane Bravery, Stand Your Ground

    8th|
    +7
    |
    +2
    |
    +2
    |
    +6
    |Unyielding Will

    9th|
    +8
    |
    +3
    |
    +3
    |
    +6
    | Not One Step Backwards

    10th|
    +9
    |
    +3
    |
    +3
    |
    +7
    |Death Before Dishonor
    [/table]

    Requirements
    To qualify to become a commissar, a character must fulfill the following criteria.
    Base Attack Bonus: +5
    Skills: Intimidate 7 Ranks
    Feats: Iron Will, Weapon Proficiency: Hand Crossbow

    Class Skills
    The Commissar's class skills are Climb (Str), Handle Animal (Cha), Craft (Int), Intimidate (Cha, Jump (Str), Listen (Wis), Ride (Dex), Spot (Wis), Swim (Str.)

    Skill Points: 2+ Int Modifier Per Level.

    Weapon and Armor Proficiency: Commissars gain no proficiency with any armor or weapon.

    Commissariat Authority: A Commissar usually has the authority to take control form any officer and execute any man that he finds lacking. this authority and reputation makes the Commissar intimidating to those that must serve under him. Commissar's get a +2 bonus on Bluff, Diplomacy, and Intimidate related checks against anyone they have authority over. (i.e. soldiers under their command, underlings, cohorts)

    Commissariat Fighting Style: The Commissar's combat training teaches him that the ability to extend his will over a range is advantageous. This also applies to the Commissar's fighting style. When a Hand Crossbow in the offhand, a Commissar counts as having the Two-Weapon Fighting Feat.

    Execution Fighting Style: A Commissar learns how to quickly execute those he finds lacking or treacherous. He also extends this to his fighting style. At 2nd Level, the Commissar gains the ability to make a single attack after a full attack. he can only make this attack if every attack of the full attack hit. He makes this extra attack at a -5 penalty. If successful, the target takes normal damage must make a Fort save DC15 + the Commissar's Commissar Class Level. If the target fails, the target dies.

    Field Execution: The Commissar has the full authority to execute traitors, cowards, and incompetents. Some Commissar's execute men randomly to encourage the others to fight harder. At 2nd level, the Commissar can make a single attack against an ally that the Commissar has Commissariat Authority over as a standard action. The ally must make a Fort Save DC20 + 2*(Commissar's Commissar Class Levels). If the save fails, the ally dies. If the ally dies, all allies who can clearly see what is happening gain a +2 fear bonus on attack rolls and will saves against fear effects so long as the Commissar is within sight or hearing distance for 4 rounds.

    Fear Me, But Follow!: The Commissar fully understands his intimidation value. He realizes that if his troops fear him enough, they will fight anything to avoid his wrath. At 3rd level, after a successful Field Execution, a Commissar make make an intimidation check (DC 15+ (# of allies within 50ft.) + (# of Enemies within sight)) as a free action. If successful, all allies within hearing distance of the Commissar gain a +2 bonus on damage rolls and a +2 bonus on will saves against fear effects so long as the Commissar is within sight or hearing distance for 4 rounds. The +2 bonus against fear saves is cumulative with that provided by a successful field execution (for a total bonus of +4.)

    Commissar's Aide: A commissar is entitled to an aide. At 3rd level, a Commissar gains the Leadership feat as a bonus feat.

    Superior Execution Style: At 4th level, the Commissar further masters the art of execution. The Commissar's extra attack after a full attack is made at a -2 attack penalty instead of a -5 and has a Fort Save DC of 25 + the Commissar's Commissar class levels. Any critical hits a Commissar successfully confirms also forces a Fort Save DC of 25 + the Commissar's Commissar class levels.

    Do You Want to Live Forever?: Some Commissars attempt to motivate their men through heroic words and by appealing to their macho side. At 5th level, a Commissar can make a DC 20 + # of allies in 50ft + # of enemies within sight Intimidate check as a free action. If successful, all men under Commissariat's Authority gain a +2 bonus on will saves against fear, a +2 bonus on attack and damage rolls, and follow the Commissar's orders without question for 1d4 rounds unless those orders are suicidal. If the Commissar makes a successful Field Execution, the men may follow even suicidal orders.

    Supreme Execution Style: At 6th level, a Commissar masters the art of execution. A successful execution causes enemies with 50ft. to gain a -4 penalty to attack and damage rolls and allies within 50ft. to gain +2 to attack and damage rolls.

    Insane Bravery: At 7th level, a Commissar gains a +6 bonus on will saves against fear effects.

    Stand Your Ground: At 7th level, a Commissar's successful Fear Me But Follow! and Do You Want To Live Forever? abilities have their numerical effects multiplied by 1.5.

    Unyielding Will: At 8th level, a Commissar becomes immune to fear effects so long as either the aide granted through Commissariat Aide is within 30ft. of him.

    Not One Step Backwards: At 9th level, a Commissar's successful Fear Me But Follow! and Do You Want To Live Forever? abilities also gain the bonus effects of making allies affected by them immune to fear and bull rush effects for 1 turn.

    Death Before Dishonor: At 10th level, a Commissar and all allies with 30ft. gain the Die hard feat for ten rounds after a successful Execution effect.

    This is my first serious attempt at serious home brew. I know as is it is absolutely horrible (either unbalanced or horribly weak) and thus humbly request aid in fixing it.

  2. - Top - End - #2
    Ogre in the Playground
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    Default Re: [Prc Class]There will be no retreat!

    Quote Originally Posted by Kasrkin View Post
    Execution Fighting Style: A Commissar learns how to quickly execute those he finds lacking or treacherous. He also extends this to his fighting style. At 2nd Level, the Commissar gains the ability to make a single attack after a full attack. he can only make this attack if every attack of the full attack hit. He makes this extra attack at a -5 penalty. If successful, the target takes normal damage must make a Fort save DC15 + the Commissar's Commissar Class Level. If the target fails, the target dies.
    This ability seems quite unbalanced, giving a save-or-die at level two is very early, even wizards don't get it until level 11-13. Not all that good at homebrew so you are going to have to look to someone else to help fix it.
    Last edited by Weezer; 2007-02-18 at 08:51 PM.
    At the heart of all beauty lies something inhuman, and these hills, the softness of the sky, the outline of the trees at this very minute lose the illusory meaning with which we clothed them, henceforth more remote than a lost paradise.
    -Camus, An Absurd Reasoning


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    Dwarf in the Playground
     
    OldWizardGuy

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    Default Re: [Prc Class]There will be no retreat!

    Why the Hand Crossbow prof.? I don't see anything about them favoring it. And the SOD isn't too unbalanced, considering the relatively low DC. tMaximum pre-epic DC 25? That's not too had to resist at lv. 15.
    "I reject your reality, and subsitute my own" -Adam Savage

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    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    The Orange Zergling's Avatar

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    Default Re: [Prc Class]There will be no retreat!

    Quote Originally Posted by Fireball.Man.Guy. View Post
    Why the Hand Crossbow prof.? I don't see anything about them favoring it.
    In the game where the Commissar is originally from, they wield a sword and a laspistol (one handed ranged weapon).

  5. - Top - End - #5
    Ogre in the Playground
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    Default Re: [Prc Class]There will be no retreat!

    For the SOD at level 2 a fighter with good con (16) would need to roll a 12 to beat it. If the Commissar was able to get within 30 ft of a spell caster then the caster would probable have to roll a 15 or 16 (assuming 11 or 12 con), which is very overpowered at low levels. I could see it making sense at high levels but it would still be slightly overpowered, eventually any person will fail a save that it could conceivably be forced to make every round, especially if it is a low AC, low Fort caster type.
    At the heart of all beauty lies something inhuman, and these hills, the softness of the sky, the outline of the trees at this very minute lose the illusory meaning with which we clothed them, henceforth more remote than a lost paradise.
    -Camus, An Absurd Reasoning


    Fourth Doctor avatar courtesy of Szilard

  6. - Top - End - #6
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    RogueGuy

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    Default Re: [Prc Class]There will be no retreat!

    Actually, assuming this character must dual wield an off hand hand crossbow then a death attack would work rather well. I think its a cool idea and a breath of fresh air.

    Come on, were talking about a hand crossbow being dual wielded. Think about it.
    There is nothing that can make that too unbalanced that I can think of.

    Edit: And what about assassins? They get a death attack at the first level of their prestige class and they have sneak attack damage on an unsuccessful strike.
    Last edited by jjpickar; 2007-02-18 at 09:33 PM.
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  7. - Top - End - #7
    Orc in the Playground
     
    Dr. Weasel's Avatar

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    Default Re: [Prc Class]There will be no retreat!

    Um.. Weezer.. this is a Presige class. Said fighter of equal level would need a 9 to save, but that still is automatically killing an enemy more than 50% of the time that an entire full round attack hits (which would be a bizarre mechanic because it would become weaker every 5 levels when the last attack's bonus drops to +1)

    There is a lot about this class that just seems off.
    The hand crossbow doesn't really seem to make sense at all, neither does 7 ranks in Intimidate... just hit that up to 8 to make it like every other prestige class.

    The class should probably get diplomacy as a class skill because that seems to be one of its main focuses.

    Also, make up your mind about what sort of BA you want to give the class. I'd say give it full Base Attack and tune the abilities way down.

    I don't think the 1st level ability should give bluff bonuses. Just because the guy has power over his troops doesn't mean they actually have to believe him. It's just giving the class a bizarre benefit that really isn't justified.

    The fighting style thing doesn't make a whole lot of sense and probably should be dropped for some follower-boosting ability.

    I really dislike the "Field Execution." Giving a DC 24 save-or-die at level seven is ridiculous, especially if it only applies to 'those who serve under him.' It is the central ability of the class, but as far as I understand, as long as somebody tells the Commissar he has command over even an epic-leveled Wizard, Rogue, whatever else with a bad Fort save, the 7th level commander could reliably kill them in one action. This just seems stupid.

    At 8th (Character) level, after killing an ally, the Commander gives allies a bonus equal to that of a 20th level bard's music, which is just too much.

    Leadership should never be given as a bonus feat. By its nature it should only be allowed by the DM in certain situations. You might want an ability to improve Intimidate (targeting multiple subjects or something)

    As I said earlier, the mechanics for the "Execution style" bit are farily bizarre, but at Character level 9, there shouldn't even be a chance of forcing an opponent into a DC 29 save-or-die

    The "Do You Want to Live Forever" ability should give followers a save against the 1d4 rounds of submission. Probably a Will save DC 10+Cha Mod+1/2 Class Level

    The +6 save against fear is also a bit bizarre. You should probably follow the precedents and only give +4 or build through the levels from +2 to +4 to +6 and giving a flat immunity to fear ability at level 9 or 10.

    Ditch the "Stand Your Ground." You are already giving far more bonuses than you should.

    I don't think you should give followers immunity to Bull Rush effects. It is pretty arbitrary and really will come into play fairly rarely.

  8. - Top - End - #8
    Pixie in the Playground
     
    SwashbucklerGuy

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    Default Re: [Prc Class]There will be no retreat!

    Quote Originally Posted by The_Orange_Zergling View Post
    In the game where the Commissar is originally from, they wield a sword and a laspistol (one handed ranged weapon).
    Maybe you could take out the crossbow and replace it with a requirement that the Commissar must carry some form of standard and wear a distinctive and highly visible suit of armor? The pistol makes a lot of since in Warhammer, but it a less technologically advanced setting it might be better for the Commissar to be highly visible, both to his own troops and his enemies, so that they know exactly who and what they're dealing with.

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