Shakespeare at the Table

[Red Fel]

File this under "just for fun." I was idling my way through my lunch hour, when I came across this ever-enjoyable quote:

That is the question-
Whether 'tis more noble in the mind to suffer
The slings and arrows of Tucker's Kobolds
Or to take arms against a Sea of Mooks
And by casting Protection from Arrows, end them?

and wondered what some classic Shakespearean quotes, scenes, or monologues would look like... At the gaming table. Will it be Two Gentlemen of d20? Taming of the Shadowrun? Or is The Munchkin of Venice more to your tastes? I'd like to open the floor to anyone who wishes to invoke their muse (it's a +1 on your invocation roll if you're a Bard) and try to rewrite a piece of classic theater for gamer consumption.

Allow me to start the thread by offering a humble submission of my own, from Shakespeare's well-known comedy, Romeo and Juliet in Faerun. Spoiler'd for length.

Spoiler: Romeo and Juliet, Act 1, Scene 1, redux

Show

GREGORY: I will frown as I pass by, and let them take it as an Intimidate check.

SAMPSON: Nay, as they dare. I will fail my Diplomacy roll at them, which is a disgrace to them, if they bear it. (Rolls a 1 on Diplomacy)

ABRAM: Do you fail your Diplomacy roll at us, sir?

SAMPSON: I do Bluff, sir. (Rolls a 1 on Bluff)

ABRAM: Do you fail your Diplomacy roll at us, sir?

SAMPSON (aside to GREGORY): Is the party Paladin of our side if I say “ay”?

GREGORY (aside to SAMPSON): No.

SAMPSON: No, sir. I do not fail my Diplomacy roll at you, sir, but I Bluff, sir.

GREGORY: Do you roll initiative, sir?

ABRAM: Initiative, sir? No, sir.

[Zombimode]

Well "Something is rotten in the Vale of Willows" came up last session (the Vale of Willows being the kingdom the campaign is centered on, obviously).

[veti]

I think you've hit upon a great idea!
Let us, all players all around the world
Pick out some day in honour of the Bard.
On Shakespeare's Day, all players and DMs
Should have to speak entirely in verse.
A player who breaks meter for a line
Incurs a minus-one on their next roll,
Whatever that may be. It's not so hard
To couch your speech into iambic lines -
Your words may be restricted, but the sense
Can get across just fine within this rule.

[comicshorse]

'Once more into the breach, dear friend, once more
Or close the wall up with some raised dead
In downtime nothing so becomes a man
As modest stilllness and some crafting
But when the Bard sings in our ears
Then let the Druid become a tiger...'

[Kitsap Charles]

Nothing as clever as the above, I fear, but this happened in real-time. Sherman, set the Wayback Machine to D&D 3.0...

I was the DM, and one of the PCs was a half-orc monk. (It's complicated; every time a new splatbook was issued he'd rebuild his character from scratch. Continuity? Pfffft!)

So at one point, the PC said, "Now is the winter of our discontent."

I immediately replied, "Made glorious spring attack by this son of orc."

[Jay R]

Even if I did this, and even if my players joined in, I have absolute faith that they would manage to do it in a mundane and mood-killing way.

Now, gentles, sit! And ye shall hear a tale,
The story of a voyage marr'd by fate,
Commencing from a port of tropic clime
Aboard a vessel minuscule, the mate
A sailor full of puissance, yet not more
Than was his captain. That idyllic shore
Sent forth five passengers upon a tour
Of but three hours' time; the weather played
The strumpet with the ship, her serenade
Turned hurricano, and not small at all,
Her crew's exertions nurs'd her to the lee
Of a long-forgotten atoll. There lamed,
Brave Gilligan and his captain dwell beside
A merchant rich as Croesus and his bride,
A wanton actress, a most learned man,
And Mary Ann,
Upon the isle for which our play is named!

[Janus]

I've shouted "What, ho!" in a Renaissance-inspired game a few times. A peasant once responded " Don't call my daughter a ho!".

[hamishspence]

Would be particularly fun to see this in a Star Wars game - might be something like the dialogue in the William Shakespeare's Star Wars books.

Exit, pursued by a wampa.

[QuidEst]

When Macbeth was told that none should prevail against him until Birnam wood marched against him, he ordered all the druids in the area put to death.

Julius Caesar never bothered putting ranks into Sense Motive.

My own bard (who has yet to obtain some means of immortality) is fond of shouting in battle, "I got a sonnet with your name on it!"

[Jay R]

I don’t believe that I would ever dare to try to write with such poetic flair. It’s hard enough to think up what to say, without the need to rhyme ex tempore. And what would be the point of such a game? Would it bring me glory, wealth or fame? I don’t see how a strict iambic meter would make my D&D game any sweeter.

This challenge, then, is one that I’ll ignore. From this point on, I’ll speak of it no more.

[Slipperychicken]

The Game Master hath told me thus:
“Fear not, Macbeth. No humanoid of woman born
Shall e'er have power upon thy character.”


Despair thy charisma score,
And let the GM whom thou still hast served
Tell thee, Macduff has the half-ooze template.

[Altair_the_Vexed]

Hey - take a look over here!

I've got a couple of these, and I'd say that they make good study aids - character motivations are broken down for the GM - and reasonable source books for gaming in their respective settings. There are lots of statted NPCs ,and different takes on the major characters.

It'd be hard to play a game that follows the plot of any of the plays precisely, but it might be interesting to see how they action goes differently when exposed to the players.