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    Ogre in the Playground
     
    Seharvepernfan's Avatar

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    Default A Unique Dragon (PEACH)

    Unlike my previous few homebrews, I'm actually looking for PEACHes for this one. I am aiming for CR 20-21. Please ignore minor formatting errors; I'm not publishing a splat book here. Also, I use a houserule that for each +1 of a weapon's enhancement, that weapon ignores 5 points of DR/magic - I don't really have a point there, just letting people know why I did it's DR like I did. I never liked dragon's casting spells or using items, so I avoided that with this one.

    Dragon
    Gargantuan Dragon
    Hit Dice: 20d12+200 (310 hp)
    Initiative: +1
    Speed: 40ft, Fly 200ft (Clumsy)
    Armor Class: 41 (-4 size, +1 Dex, +4 Deflection, +30 Natural), touch 11, flat-footed 40
    Base Attack/Grapple: +20/+45
    Attack: Bite +32 (4d6+16), or Slams +30 (2d10+9), or 2 Talons +30 (2d6+9), or Tail Slap/Sweep +30 (2d8+22)
    Full Attack: Bite +32 (4d6+16), 2 Slams +30 (2d10+9) or 2 Talons +30 (2d6+9), Tail Slap/Sweep +30 (2d8+22)
    Space/Reach: 20ft/15ft
    Special Attacks: Breath Weapon, Crush, Curse, Death Curse, Improved Grab, Spell-like Abilities (20th), Swallow Whole, Trample
    Special Qualities: Blindsense (60ft), DR 25/Magic, DR 15/Cold Iron, Energy Resistance 30, Engine of Destruction, Freedom of Movement, Frightful Presence, Immune to Curse/Paralysis/Sleep Effects, Keen Senses, Regeneration 10/Cold Iron, Scent, SR 30, True Seeing, Unholy Aura (DC 28)
    Saves: Fort +26, Ref +17, Will +26
    Abilities: Str 37, Dex 12, Con 31, Int 26, Wis 26, Cha 26
    Skills: Arcana 13, Architecture/Engineering 9, Balance 6, Bluff 33, Climb 22, Diplomacy 33, Dungeoneering 9, Geography 9, Hide 0, History 9, Intimidate 33/45, Jump 40, Listen 31, Local 9, Nature 15, Nobility/Royalty 13, Move Silently 12, Planar 9, Religion 9, Search 31/33, Sense Motive 33, Spellcraft 22, Spot 31, Survival 20/22/24
    Feats: Track, Multi-attack, Breath Weapon Focus, Power Attack, Iron Will, Flyby Attack, Quicken Spell-like Ability (Greater Dispel Magic)
    Languages: Draconic, Common, Dwarven, Elven, Undercommon, Giant, Orc, Goblin, Sylvan
    Environment: Any Cold
    Organization: Solitary
    Challenge Rating: 20? 21?
    Treasure: Up to you
    Alignment: Chaotic Evil

    Talons = feet claws
    The dragon can make slam attacks if not flying, or talon attacks if flying, but not both. It's tail slap attack works like a tail sweep if it so chooses, and can be made as part of a full-attack.

    Breath Weapon (Su): A jet of super-heated acid, laden with poisonous fumes. 120ft spreading line*. 10d6 fire damage + 10d6 acid damage, DC 32 Reflex save for half. Anyone who takes any damage from the breath weapon continues taking damage in subsequent rounds. In the 1st round after taking damage from the breath weapon, the target takes an additional 5d6 fire + 5d6 acid damage (or 2d6 fire + 2d6 acid if they made their save). This happens again in the third round, with the damage dealing half what it did in the 2nd round (2d6+2d6 or 1d6+1d6), and again in the fourth round (unless they made their save) for 1d6+1d6. Anyone who took fire damage from the attack catches fire, taking an additional 1d6 damage each round unless they put the fire out (same as alchemists fire) - this is in addition to the continuing damage, and putting out this fire does not stop the continuing damage. Anyone inside the area of the breath weapon must make a fortitude save vs. poison (DC 32) or be affected with the effects of the "rage" spell for one minute (secondary effect is 1d6 con damage) - this is considered an "inhaled" poison. Finally, after the dragon uses it's breath weapon in combat, it's bite damage deals an additional 1d6 fire and 1d6 acid damage with each successful attack.
    Spoiler: Breath Dimensions
    Show



    Curse (Su): Will Save (DC 30) - The dragon can lay a curse on any creature within it's frightful presence radius that it is aware of as a free action by speaking a few words. The dragon then knows the exact location of that creature, anywhere in the multiverse, until the dragon curses a different creature. The affect is magical, but is not blocked by any spells or spell resistance. Cha-based, +2 racial bonus.

    Death Curse (Su): save Will (DC 28); affects the creature that slays the dragon. The affected creature can no longer be affected by healing spells and does not heal damage naturally from rest. Removing the curse via spell requires the caster to pass a CL check (DC 30).
    The save DC is Charisma-based.

    Energy Resistance (Ex): The dragon resists the first 30 points of damage each time it takes damage from an energy source (acid, cold, electricity, fire, & sonic). Weapons with energy enhancements (such as flaming, or shocking burst) still deal their damage if any of the attack's other damage manages to bypass the Dragon's DR.

    Engine of Destruction (Su): The dragon's natural weapons have +3 enhancement bonus. It's attacks ignore hardness of 8 or less, and deal double damage to objects. Every slam or tailslap/sweep attack it makes gains the brutal surge enhancement (free bull-rush to maximum distance, but the dragon does not have to follow them). Bull-rushed enemies take 1d6 damage for every 5ft they would have traveled if they are stopped by an object, and bull-rushed enemies who are moved into the space of another creature deal this damage to the creature as well. Both are affected by a trip attempt. The dragon can trample for free as part of a move action rather than as a full-round action. The dragon gains a +8 bonus on Str checks to break objects. Otherwise as the Juggernaut spell (with augment).
    Spoiler: Juggernaut Spell
    Show


    Frightful Presence (Ex): As an "ancient" dragon (DC 28). Affects anyone with 20HD or less.

    Improved Grab: Bite & Talons.

    Keen Senses (Ex): As a true dragon.

    Regeneration (Su): The dragon heals wounds at a rate of 10hp per round, except those caused by cold iron weapons. In addition, the dragon heals ability damage at a rate of 1 point per round (1 point of each ability).

    Spell-like Abilities (CL 20th): At will - Greater Dispel Magic. 3/day - Quickened Greater Dispel Magic, Plane Shift, Spell Turning, Greater Teleport. Constant (at will) - Freedom of Movement, True Seeing.

    Swallow Whole: 10d6 acid damage per round + save vs. breath poison + continuing acid damage if target escapes the gullet.

    Trample: 2d10+22 (DC 33)

    Unholy Aura (Su): As the spell, affects only the dragon, can be dispelled but will reappear at the beginning of the dragon's next turn. Cha-based.


    This massive unique dragon has traits of both true dragons and linnorms, suggesting that it may be a crossbreed of the two. The only physical difference between it and a true dragon is that it does not have six limbs; it's forelegs are also it's wings, though they look to be designed as legs first and wings second. Also, the dragon has prominent fists on it's forelegs, rather than the typical clawed foot of other dragons, which it walks on like an ape would. It slams enemies with it's forelegs like a human would punch with it's fists. It's fingers continue on behind the dragon to become the wings, which fold back sharply, pointing up and behind the dragon at a 45 degree angle.

    The dragon is grey-green in color, with glowing red eyes and a brown-grey underbelly. The leathery membranes of it's wings are similar in color to it's underbelly, but somewhat redder. It's scaly hide is rough and uneven, like an alligator. It has a heavy, dense muscular build, with a plodding gait. It's movements shake the ground, giving off the impression of a walking landslide.
    Last edited by Seharvepernfan; 2015-01-28 at 08:47 PM.
    Spoiler: Ironcage Keep
    Show
    Initiative:

    - Leo
    - Enemies
    - Frith (Light, 92 rounds), Obergrym (rage 5 rounds, 14/17 hp), Melrik - CURRENT
    - Enemies
    - Jade
    - Enemies

  2. - Top - End - #2
    Dwarf in the Playground
     
    Devil

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    Default Re: A Unique Dragon (PEACH)

    One comment: I don't quite get how its front legs would work/look like. They're legs and wings and they also have fists with claws? How does that work? Whats it look like?
    I prefer Pathfinder to D&D but we can still be friends if you don't
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    Ogre in the Playground
     
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    Default Re: A Unique Dragon (PEACH)

    Quote Originally Posted by Oracle_of_Void View Post
    One comment: I don't quite get how its front legs would work/look like. They're legs and wings and they also have fists with claws? How does that work? Whats it look like?
    Here's what I was thinking: Imagine a dragon that has gorilla arms (minus the fur) in place of front legs, except the last digit of each finger is a claw instead of a fingertip. I sorta half imagined the wings to just come out of the outside of the arm, starting at the hand and running up to the shoulder.
    However, when I saw your comment and went to sketch it out, I realized it doesn't make sense, does it? A wing is kinda like a giant hand, and each "finger" needs to stretch out to the edge of the wing, so if anything, the dragon is walking on a giant wrist nub. I could change it so that he is still walking on his fists, but that his fingers continue out from under to become wings, kinda like in this picture of Smaug, except the fingers aren't coming out to the side, and therefor the wings fold sharply back, pointing up and back at a 45 degree angle. He wouldn't have claws this way, though, except for his thumbs. Imagine if your hand itself (not counting the fingers) were much larger and had very prominent bony knuckles.

    Does that make sense? I could draw that. Gonna edit out the claws, anyway.
    Spoiler: Ironcage Keep
    Show
    Initiative:

    - Leo
    - Enemies
    - Frith (Light, 92 rounds), Obergrym (rage 5 rounds, 14/17 hp), Melrik - CURRENT
    - Enemies
    - Jade
    - Enemies

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    Default Re: A Unique Dragon (PEACH)

    Having to roll a separate set of dice on later rounds for those who made their save, rather than using the same amount and then dividing seems like it would slow the game down. It is definitely non-standard. Now, I'm the king of "non-standard", one of my monsters has a DR listing that is several logical operations long.

    Listing out the full text for the abilities, and especially what the multiple entries for intimidate and Survival mean would help this be useful to people other than yourself. You put some work into it, why not go the extra mile and make it "user friendly" so that other people can benefit from it too? It might help you get comments (no promises though).

    Some "Fluff" on this creature would be useful so that we can see how well it matches the "crunch". What are its motivations? Its personality? Its tactics? What is the guiding principle behind the SLAs you selected for it?
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    Default Re: A Unique Dragon (PEACH)

    Quote Originally Posted by DracoDei View Post
    Having to roll a separate set of dice on later rounds for those who made their save, rather than using the same amount and then dividing seems like it would slow the game down. It is definitely non-standard. Now, I'm the king of "non-standard", one of my monsters has a DR listing that is several logical operations long.

    Listing out the full text for the abilities, and especially what the multiple entries for intimidate and Survival mean would help this be useful to people other than yourself. You put some work into it, why not go the extra mile and make it "user friendly" so that other people can benefit from it too? It might help you get comments (no promises though).

    Some "Fluff" on this creature would be useful so that we can see how well it matches the "crunch". What are its motivations? Its personality? Its tactics? What is the guiding principle behind the SLAs you selected for it?
    With the continuing damage, it simply does half in the 2nd round, then half of that in the 3rd round, and so on. Since people who make their saves take half damage, they have a different pool. I figured it would be simpler to show that than to just tell it.

    Intimidate is +33, but +45 against medium-sized opponents (41 vs large, 37 vs huge). Survival gets circumstantial synergy bonuses from two skills (knowledge nature and search), so does search itself (knowledge architecture/engineering).

    The fluff is whatever the DM wants it to be, but the main idea with the dragon is basically that: big scary dragon comes crashing in and messes up the place, and can find you no matter where you run to. It's motivations are likely greed, hatred, and a love of destruction, or perhaps it's the tool of an even greater being. It's personality doesn't fall to far from that, I'd imagine. It's tactics are what you'd expect from a creature with huge resistances and an ability called "engine of destruction". The SLA's are for following prey, getting somewhere quickly, and messing with casters.

    I'm not asking for advice for the fluff, though, I just want to know if there are any problems with the mechanics, or balance.
    Spoiler: Ironcage Keep
    Show
    Initiative:

    - Leo
    - Enemies
    - Frith (Light, 92 rounds), Obergrym (rage 5 rounds, 14/17 hp), Melrik - CURRENT
    - Enemies
    - Jade
    - Enemies

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    Default Re: A Unique Dragon (PEACH)

    Quote Originally Posted by Seharvepernfan View Post
    Since people who make their saves take half damage, they have a different pool.
    Except that most people don't do it that way, and it probably isn't RAW.
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    Default Re: A Unique Dragon (PEACH)

    Quote Originally Posted by DracoDei View Post
    Except that most people don't do it that way, and it probably isn't RAW.
    It's just common sense.
    Spoiler: Ironcage Keep
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    Initiative:

    - Leo
    - Enemies
    - Frith (Light, 92 rounds), Obergrym (rage 5 rounds, 14/17 hp), Melrik - CURRENT
    - Enemies
    - Jade
    - Enemies

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    Default Re: A Unique Dragon (PEACH)

    Quote Originally Posted by Oracle_of_Void View Post
    One comment: I don't quite get how its front legs would work/look like. They're legs and wings and they also have fists with claws? How does that work? Whats it look like?
    Found a picture that shows what I was originally thinking, minus the fists (apparently some artist had the same idea, though it doesn't make much sense):

    Last edited by Seharvepernfan; 2015-01-31 at 04:12 PM.
    Spoiler: Ironcage Keep
    Show
    Initiative:

    - Leo
    - Enemies
    - Frith (Light, 92 rounds), Obergrym (rage 5 rounds, 14/17 hp), Melrik - CURRENT
    - Enemies
    - Jade
    - Enemies

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    Default Re: A Unique Dragon (PEACH)

    Your image is not visible, try rehosting on imgur.

    Dragons essentially have cat skeletons but you don't usually picture a dragon locking it's knees and arching it's back when it gets threatened, you could just mix it with another reptile to shape it's general bulky frame, such as a komodo dragon which fixes the knee problems.

    Since DnD is pretty much a game of description, you could use the cat + large reptile analogy and then go from there, or build a creature and note all differences from existing dragons.

    I'm kind of partial to escaflowne dragons myself.

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    Default Re: A Unique Dragon (PEACH)



    Does that work?

    Anyway, how it looks isn't too important. I just want to know if the dragon is CR 20 or 21, and if it has any glaring weaknesses or problems.
    Spoiler: Ironcage Keep
    Show
    Initiative:

    - Leo
    - Enemies
    - Frith (Light, 92 rounds), Obergrym (rage 5 rounds, 14/17 hp), Melrik - CURRENT
    - Enemies
    - Jade
    - Enemies

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    Default Re: A Unique Dragon (PEACH)

    bump!

    Cmon, if you come in to look at it, at least say something.
    Spoiler: Ironcage Keep
    Show
    Initiative:

    - Leo
    - Enemies
    - Frith (Light, 92 rounds), Obergrym (rage 5 rounds, 14/17 hp), Melrik - CURRENT
    - Enemies
    - Jade
    - Enemies

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    Default Re: A Unique Dragon (PEACH)

    Excellent stat block; I'd just make minor tweaks.

    Dragon
    Gargantuan Dragon
    Hit Dice: 20d12+200 (330 hp)
    Initiative: +1
    Speed: 40 ft (8 squares), Fly 200 ft. (Clumsy)
    Armor Class: 41 (-4 size, +1 Dex, +4 Deflection, +30 Natural), touch 11, flat-footed 40
    Base Attack/Grapple: +20/+45
    Attack: Bite +32 melee (4d6+16)
    Full Attack: Bite +32 melee (4d6+16) and 2 wings +30 melee (2d10+9) and 2 claws +30 melee (2d6+9) and tail slap +30 melee (2d8+22)
    Space/Reach: 20 ft./15 ft.
    Special Attacks: Breath Weapon, Crush, Curse, Death Curse, Improved Grab, Spell-like Abilities (20th), Swallow Whole, Trample
    Special Qualities: Blindsense (60 ft.), DR 25/Magic, DR 15/Cold Iron, Energy Resistance 30, Engine of Destruction, Freedom of Movement, Frightful Presence, Immune to Curse/Paralysis/Sleep Effects, Keen Senses, Regeneration 10/Cold Iron, Scent, SR 30, True Seeing, Unholy Aura (DC 28)
    Saves: Fort +26, Ref +17, Will +26
    Abilities: Str 37, Dex 12, Con 31, Int 26, Wis 26, Cha 26
    Skills: Arcana 13, Architecture/Engineering 9, Balance 6, Bluff 33, Climb 22, Diplomacy 33, Dungeoneering 9, Geography 9, Hide 0, History 9, Intimidate 33/45, Jump 40, Listen 31, Local 9, Nature 15, Nobility/Royalty 13, Move Silently 12, Planar 9, Religion 9, Search 31/33, Sense Motive 33, Spellcraft 22, Spot 31, Survival 20/22/24
    Feats: Track, Multiattack, Breath Weapon Focus, Power Attack, Iron Will, Flyby Attack, Quicken Spell-like Ability (Greater Dispel Magic)
    Languages: Draconic, Common, Dwarven, Elven, Undercommon, Giant, Orc, Goblin, Sylvan
    Environment: Any Cold
    Organization: Solitary (Unique)
    Challenge Rating:
    Treasure: Double Standard
    Alignment: Always Chaotic Evil[[/quote]

    It has the wrong hit points for example. Should be 330. 20 x 6.5= 130 + 200 = 330. Could use a better name than just dragon too.

    Attack should only list the creatures primary attack. Secondary attacks go on the full attack line.

    Looks like it has 366 skill ranks to use but I have no idea how you assigned them. The numbers don't seem to add up. It can have a max of 23 ranks in any skill.

    Engine of Destruction should have a save for the bull rush. Also, you try to do too much. The juggernaut is a spell-like ability and should be separate. It needs a duration. and caster level. Which book is it from? You didn't post enough information about the spell.


    Engine of Destruction (Su): The dragon's natural weapons have +3 enhancement bonus. Its attacks ignore hardness of 8 or less, and deal double damage to objects. Every successful wing and tail slap attack it makes allows the dragon to make a bull rush on its target as if the attacks had the brutal surge enhancement . After a successful attack, the dragon can make a bull rush on the target it hit in addition to making the attack. The bull rush does not provoke an attack of opportunity from the target. A bull rushed target is pushed back 40 feet if on the ground or 200 feet in the air unless the target makes successful Fortitude save (DC 33). The save is strength-based. If the target is stopped by an object, the target takes 1d6 points of damage for every 5 feet it traveled. If the bull rushed target is moved into a space occupied by a creature both take this damage. The dragon does not have to follow its target unless the dragon is flying.

    Juggernaut (Sp): How many times a day can this spell be used and what is the duration? CL?

    You didn't list any spell-like abilities.

    The breath Weapon is needlessly complex and causes far too much damage unless the targets get a save with a +2 bonus as the fumes dissipate. Also the catching on fire shouldn't be automatic, 50% chance is more reasonable. The poison technically is a boon to the targets -- most will voluntarily fail their saves to get these bonuses. Since the spell doesn't cause Con damage, neither should the poison IMO but YMMV. This poison I liked the least since it felt bloated with all the fire damage. How do targets gain a boost to Con AND then take damage from it? Not a fan of it. However, I can still make it work.

    Breath Weapon (Su): Three times a day as a standard action, a dragon can breathe a jet of super-heated acid, laden with poisonous fumes in a 120-foot spreading line*. The attack deals 10d6 points of fire damage and 10d6 points of acid damage. A successful Reflex save (DC 31) halves the damage. The save is Constitution-based. Anyone who takes any damage from the breath weapon continues to take decreasing amounts of damage in subsequent rounds unless the target moves out of range of the fumes or makes a save. Each round the target gains a +2 bonus to its save as the effects of the breath weapon dissipate.. In the 1st round after taking damage from the breath weapon, a target takes an additional 5d6 points of fire and 5d6 points of acid damage (or 2d6 fire + 2d6 acid if the target made its save). This happens again in the third round, with the damage dealing half what it did in the 2nd round (2d6+2d6 or 1d6+1d6), and again in the fourth round (unless they made their save) for 1d6+1d6. Anyone who takes fire damage from the attack has a 50% chance of catching on fire, taking an additional 1d6 points of fire damage each round unless the fire is put out. The target can use a full-round action to attempt to extinguish the flames before taking this additional damage. Extinguishing the flames requires a DC 15 Reflex save. Rolling on the ground provides the target a +2 bonus on the save. Leaping into a lake or magically extinguishing the flames automatically smothers the fire. Last of all, a moderate or more powerful wind causes the fumes to dissipate, which may end the attack even sooner.

    Enraging Poison (Sp): Everyone inside the area of the breath weapon must also make a Fortitude save vs. poison (DC 21) or be affected with the effects of the rage spell for one minute, but with the added drawback of taking 1d6 Con damage as secondary damage. This is considered an inhaled poison. Each affected creature gains a +2 morale bonus to Strength and Constitution, a +1 morale bonus on Will saves, and a -2 penalty to AC. Targets are not fatigued once the poison wears off. The save is Charisma-based.

    Debby
    Last edited by Debihuman; 2015-02-10 at 07:14 AM.
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