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  1. - Top - End - #1
    Ogre in the Playground
     
    TigerHunter's Avatar

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    Default Someday, We'll All Look Back at This and Laugh

    So... I rode my bike to the bookstore today. It's eight miles away, but it's good exercise and I prefer riding to driving anyways. Picked up the Spell Compendium and draped the bag over the handlebars, then pedaled off towards home.
    Far enough away from the bookstore that going back isn't an attractive option, guess what? The bag rips. So not only does my shiny new book fall down onto sharp gravel rocks and get all scratched up, I now have no way of holding it. My bike bag is just right for paperbacks, but textbook-size is beyond it's capacity. So I end up steering with one hand and holding it in the other.
    Bikes have two handlebars for a reason. Rapid deceleration? Good luck. Sharp turns? Fat chance. Rapid deceleration in preparation for a sharp turn? Hope you're wearing a helmet. Highlights of the trip back included flipping over the front wheel in the middle of a busy intersection, hitting the curb at just the wrong angle, nearly getting run over by a parked car, and rapidly swerving off the road and into a tree because the alternative was ramming a cop car.
    Fun times.

    What have YOU done that wasn't fun at all at the time, but now makes for an entertaining story that everyone, including you, can laugh at?
    The above post made a lot more sense in my head.

    Epic avatar by Mr. Saturn. Thanks Mr. Saturn!

  2. - Top - End - #2
    Troll in the Playground
     
    ForzaFiori's Avatar

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    Default Re: Someday, We'll All Look Back at This and Laugh

    i chuncked a brick at a car when i was 5.
    put a 1 inch deep dent in the door.
    Avatar by Lycunadari

    Go Tigers!

  3. - Top - End - #3
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    Nomrom's Avatar

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    Default Re: Someday, We'll All Look Back at This and Laugh

    That's not a bad throw for a five year old.

  4. - Top - End - #4
    Ogre in the Playground
     
    Syka's Avatar

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    Default Re: Someday, We'll All Look Back at This and Laugh

    I caught a hot iron with my arm. :) It hurt.
    Show me how pretty the world is
    'Cause I envy the way that you move
    Show me how pretty the world is
    'Cause I want something a little bit louder
    Show me how pretty the world is
    'Cause you're brilliant when you try
    Show me how pretty the whole world is tonight
    -Matt Nathanson "Pretty the World"

    Various Syka-Foxes done by the wonderful Ceika

  5. - Top - End - #5
    Halfling in the Playground
     
    Krursk's Avatar

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    Default Re: Someday, We'll All Look Back at This and Laugh

    I stabbed myself with a soldering iron 13 times in just under an hour and a half two years ago. I hold a record at my school for it
    New Avatar! Credit and thanks to the amazing Strawberries


  6. - Top - End - #6
    Ogre in the Playground
     
    crazedloon's Avatar

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    Default Re: Someday, We'll All Look Back at This and Laugh

    Hmm I have to say that is a little pathetic. I have done much the same (i.e. bike with 1 hand) through the woods up and down hills holding a 12 pack of soda. Now that is hard.

    However the second you put a motor on a vehicle and I have the worst luck. Including hitting a mailbox (that was fun) blowing out a tire do to a misjudged turn (mostly due to tire age) and hitting an idiot who stopped short. Boy all those sucked
    Check out my horrible homebrews

  7. - Top - End - #7
    Ogre in the Playground
     
    TigerHunter's Avatar

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    Default Re: Someday, We'll All Look Back at This and Laugh

    Quote Originally Posted by crazedloon View Post
    Hmm I have to say that is a little pathetic.

    Quote Originally Posted by crazedloon View Post
    I have done much the same (i.e. bike with 1 hand) through the woods up and down hills holding a 12 pack of soda. Now that is hard.
    Not speaking from any sort of experience, but yes, it certainly is.
    The above post made a lot more sense in my head.

    Epic avatar by Mr. Saturn. Thanks Mr. Saturn!

  8. - Top - End - #8
    Dwarf in the Playground
     
    Ceres's Avatar

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    Default Re: Someday, We'll All Look Back at This and Laugh

    I had two schoolmates attack my hand with a key and an eraser until the blood flowed, just to see what my pain-threshold was. I still bear the scar to this day. Also, we used to heat up pencils in the overhead and burn each other with them. Have a couple of scars from that as well.

    But well, was ihn nicht umbringt, macht ihn starker.
    OotSP :D
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  9. - Top - End - #9
    Troll in the Playground
     
    ForzaFiori's Avatar

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    Default Re: Someday, We'll All Look Back at This and Laugh

    while i didn't do this, a friend of mine took a long match, heated it up w/ its own fire, and jabbed it into his skin.
    where it promptly got infected.

    the really ironic part? he did it b/c we said he was too immature to use a lighter.
    Avatar by Lycunadari

    Go Tigers!

  10. - Top - End - #10
    Barbarian in the Playground
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    Default Re: Someday, We'll All Look Back at This and Laugh

    Quote Originally Posted by mf11 View Post
    the really ironic part? he did it b/c we said he was too immature to use a lighter.
    I think he was right.
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    Avatar by jamroar

    Pirate Lucky by Ceika, Lady Luck by Ego, Lucky Luke by Captain Van Der Decken

  11. - Top - End - #11
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Midnight Son's Avatar

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    Default Re: Someday, We'll All Look Back at This and Laugh

    I once flipped my car at 80mph. I tell ya, that was the best ride of my life till the pain caught up to me. The speed of pain is apparently slower than 80mph. In fact, it seems to meander and amble along at a steady pace, but always catches you anyway. Pain, your name is Pepé Le Pew.
    Avatar by Sneak - The Midnight Son by Ceika
    No more a lone wolf, The Midnight Son rides again.
    Give thanks ye mortals, for he rides on the wings of an angel.
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  12. - Top - End - #12
    Halfling in the Playground
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    Default Re: Someday, We'll All Look Back at This and Laugh

    An 8 mile ruck march (body armor, helmet, pack, rifle) in uniform. I was forced to do the walk, wearing the uniform with the other stuff was optional. That really sucked, but now telling the stories is hilarious. The look on the poor computer guy's face an hour afterwards when he was told to go on a job about a 1/4 mile away was priceless (we didn't have access to drive there).

  13. - Top - End - #13
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    Flabbicus's Avatar

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    Default Re: Someday, We'll All Look Back at This and Laugh

    Crashed into a tree while I was riding on a sled with a friend. Funny thing was, he decided it would be better if he steered.

    Next thing we new we had crashed into a thorn bush and had to extirpate ourselves from it.
    Groom to the Haberdasher's Daughter.



    Freddy Krueger by Ink, Flabbicus by Lord Herman, Rilik by Ceika.

  14. - Top - End - #14
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    NecromancerGuy

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    Default Re: Someday, We'll All Look Back at This and Laugh

    I once got hit by a bus and died. That, my friends(?), was indeed a rubbish day.

    Still, mustn't grumble.

  15. - Top - End - #15
    Ogre in the Playground
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    Default Re: Someday, We'll All Look Back at This and Laugh

    Quote Originally Posted by TigerHunter View Post
    Highlights of the trip back included flipping over the front wheel in the middle of a busy intersection, hitting the curb at just the wrong angle, nearly getting run over by a parked car, and rapidly swerving off the road and into a tree because the alternative was ramming a cop car.
    Fun times.
    I'm laughing only because you're okay. I've had an altercation with those devious parked cars once or twice in my day. They're cunning and cruel!


    For me, I've so far managed not to injure myself too hilariously, unless you count the time in sophomore gym class where I got ticked off that one of the kids on the other (basketball) team was cheating. Instead of punching him (I'm a pass-a-fist) I decided it would be better to not get suspended; I hauled off and put all my strength into a right cross to the middle of our mascott's head on one of the padded cushions beneath the hoop. Yay padded cushion. 2 inch thick padded cushion. Covering a 12 inch thick concrete wall.

    I was so angry that I didn't notice that I had broken my hand until the gym teacher screamed that the bone was jutting out. Whoops.

    I missed my driver's test because of that bout of stupidity. They don't let you test with a manual transmission when your right hand doesn't work.
    Homebrew World: Daera - high fantasy setting on a world without humans
    Quote Originally Posted by Teddy View Post
    If the world was a Hollywood movie, Overdrive would be the protagonist.

  16. - Top - End - #16
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Shiny, Bearer of the Pokystick's Avatar

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    Default Re: Someday, We'll All Look Back at This and Laugh

    Hm...well, I certainly didn't enjoy it at the time, but my upbringing among southern baptists (with jesus-based camp, even!) is, demonstrably, funny in retrospect.

    If you're wondering, it didn't...really stick. >.<;

  17. - Top - End - #17
    Bugbear in the Playground
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    Default Re: Someday, We'll All Look Back at This and Laugh

    I almost drowned on a pool...and my family was thinking i was a natural swimmer...


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    Quote Originally Posted by radikalskippy
    But I must say the Izzet bunch are as crazy as a rabid goat with a rat biting its tail.
    Quote Originally Posted by Moon_Called View Post
    *ahem* *picks up megaphone*
    Attention everyone! Mal absolutly rocks!

    Mal, I name you Fangirlfreind. Whenever you are in aid, call and we shall answer.
    http://i52.photobucket.com/albums/g1...alpromteal.png

  18. - Top - End - #18
    Troll in the Playground
     
    RTGoodman's Avatar

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    Default Re: Someday, We'll All Look Back at This and Laugh

    Speaking of encounters with parked cars...

    My friend Dave came over to my house one evening so he could ride with me and our other buddy Paul to a gaming session, and apparently parked his black Jeep directly behind my Jeep, rather than in the open area on the other side of the driveway. And remember, it's like 8:00 at night, with no moon and no lights (since we live out in the middle of the country).

    I hop in my Jeep, turn on the headlights, and put it in Reverse, and just start backing out to turn around. About 2 seconds later, there was a tremendous crash and my Jeep stopped moving. Dave, from the passenger seat looked right at me and gasped. I yelled, "what was that!" to which he replied "...I think that was my car!"

    I put the car in Drive and pulled up about 5 feet, and then we all jumped out. Turns out that, if you drive a car that's dark light the night, you shouldn't park directly behind someone. When we got to his car, it turned out that the rear driver's side corner of my Jeep had collided with the front passenger's side corner of his Jeep, completely denting in the area about the wheel that sticks out. So my buddy Paul's solution? He just walks up, puts his hands inside the wheel well, and pops it back out. And of course, the only thing that happened to my Jeep was that it scraped some of the paint off.

    It took Dave's dad about 10 months to notice that the front corner of Dave's Jeep was dented and the paint looked all crackled and chipped and such. But, on the record, that happened "in the Wal-Mart parking lot".

  19. - Top - End - #19
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    purple gelatinous cube o' Doom's Avatar

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    Default Re: Someday, We'll All Look Back at This and Laugh

    At work a series or two ago (about a month to a month and a half ago) in the course of a week, a hard rake slipped out of my hand and I got a pretty good gash in my left leg from that, got my middle finger pinched between the blade and the reel housing of our mower trying to get a belt back on track (which is still all black btw), burned on my right arm from the motor housing on our greensmower we use for the infield, and then there's the half a dozen other cuts and scrapes I get on a daily basis.
    Grinning Purple Gelatinous Cube avatar courtesy of Lord_Herman
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  20. - Top - End - #20
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Ranis's Avatar

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    Default Re: Someday, We'll All Look Back at This and Laugh

    Jeez, my story fits in every one of these kind of threads.

    I cut my finger off with a hatchet while teaching cub scouts how to cut firewood.
    Druid-Ninjatar by the sensuous Serpentine.

  21. - Top - End - #21
    Orc in the Playground
     
    Lizardfolk

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    Default Re: Someday, We'll All Look Back at This and Laugh

    Ever been hit in the head with a flying bird?

    Me neither but I saw it happen... twice... to the same person.

  22. - Top - End - #22
    Pixie in the Playground
     
    WildArcana's Avatar

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    Default Re: Someday, We'll All Look Back at This and Laugh

    Quote Originally Posted by Ranis View Post
    Jeez, my story fits in every one of these kind of threads.

    I cut my finger off with a hatchet while teaching cub scouts how to cut firewood.
    Wow. Where is it now?
    Quote Originally Posted by Serpentine View Post
    I don't think the reference to clubs was directly associated with romantic intent...
    Awesome avatar courtesy of Serpentine.

  23. - Top - End - #23
    Troll in the Playground
     
    ForzaFiori's Avatar

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    Default Re: Someday, We'll All Look Back at This and Laugh

    Quote Originally Posted by Ranis View Post
    Jeez, my story fits in every one of these kind of threads.

    I cut my finger off with a hatchet while teaching cub scouts how to cut firewood.
    OW.

    reminds me of this story i read in the darwin awards where a scoutmaster was showing some new scouts how to chop wood, and as an example of why u shouldn't hit w/ a glancing blow, he took a swing, glanced off the wood, and buried the ax in his knee.

    excellent example of why NOT to hit with a glancing blow if u ask me.
    Avatar by Lycunadari

    Go Tigers!

  24. - Top - End - #24
    Pixie in the Playground
     
    WildArcana's Avatar

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    Default Re: Someday, We'll All Look Back at This and Laugh

    I watched Spiderman 3, once.
    Quote Originally Posted by Serpentine View Post
    I don't think the reference to clubs was directly associated with romantic intent...
    Awesome avatar courtesy of Serpentine.

  25. - Top - End - #25
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Vonriel's Avatar

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    Default Re: Someday, We'll All Look Back at This and Laugh

    Quote Originally Posted by Ranis View Post
    Jeez, my story fits in every one of these kind of threads.

    I cut my finger off with a hatchet while teaching cub scouts how to cut firewood.
    And I think the same answer has been posted in every one of these kind of threads.

    Wouldn't that be "while teaching cub scouts how not to cut firewood"?


    Let's see.. there was this time in elementary school where a bird attacked my head after I rode past its bush on my way to school. Does that count? It scared the boop outta me too.
    -Vonriel

    "DEMONS RUN WHEN A GOOD MAN GOES TO WAR."

  26. - Top - End - #26
    Dwarf in the Playground
     
    Imrahil's Avatar

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    Default Re: Someday, We'll All Look Back at This and Laugh

    Now this is the thread for me. I've got some great 'bar stories' to tell, so here's one of my favorites.

    During my last year of high school, our graduating class got to go on a trip to Quebec. Two days staying at a ski resort, having 4-person lodges to stay with one's closest friends...should have been heaven.

    The first day there, we had the option of going skiing for the day or going to something called a 'snow park' (more on that later). I've been skiing since I was 7, and I was all set for a great day with some nice powder. However, the skis they were supposed to have ready for me weren't adjusted for my large boots. Thus, I took them in to get them fixed up, and I figured it was problem solved. However, they didn't tighten the right one properly, something I found out when I got to the top of the black double diamond run. Ten seconds in, my right ski comes off, and now I'm trying to maneuver with only one ski. I don't care how good you are, you're still going down - and so I did. Luckily, I wasn't that injured, and my ski stopped 50 meters or so down the hill. I figured, just get the ski, tighten it myself, and continue on with my day. Unfortunately, I didn't count on a patch of ice between myself and my destination, and ski boots don't handle that well on a sharp, slick incline. Next thing I know, I'm on my ass again, this time with a sprained ankle. First run of the day, and I have to be driven back to my lodge to spend the rest of the day watching French TV.

    Thinking it couldn't get any worse, the next day I decided to test my ankle touring the old Quebec City with the rest of the class. Making it through the day with only a few irritations, my friends convinced me I would be OK enough to go to the snow park that evening. Now, for those of you who don't know, a snow park is essentially like a water park, where one has 'snow slides' instead of water slides to enjoy. Near the end of the night, which had been enjoyable enough to make me forget my pains, my friends and I decided to try snow rafting; this is where they have a white water raft and send 6-8 people down a specialized run at once.

    Now, to make sure the raft actually goes down the run properly, they had designed an entrance chute with a swinging metal gate to hold the raft in place until everybody got in, at which time it would open and we could get on our merry way. Lazy people we were, we decided to drop the raft about 2 feet from the gate and start piling in. The slide operator wasn't happy about this, and instructed us to get out and put it right up to the gate. I figured, I was only going to put one foot out of the raft, that way it would be less work for me to do. As the raft settled up to the gate, I sat back down in the second row, my friend Colin in the front, and my friend Justin right behind me, with the others almost ready to get in. However, the gate chose that moment to open up by itself. As we're sliding forward, I heard the girls yell out something to us, so I turned around to hear what they were saying. Suddenly, I realized that we were moving, and I whipped my head back around, when something grey and moving caught my eye.

    My thought process as I remember it was something like "Wait, we shouldn't be moving yet...huh, what could that grey thing be...it kind of looks like that gate that - oh SH..." Then a few dozen pounds of frozen metal clocked square in the centre of the head. Then I woke up at the bottom of the run with the girls leaning over me praying that I wasn't dead. After enduring a rescue crew that almost flipped the snowmobile that I was riding on my way to the first aid station, having the most directionally-challenged teacher trying to find a hospital at 11 at night, and then trying to get them to spell my last name right (I wrote it down for them, but somehow they still managed to get it wrong), I was told that the school now had a case study and a reason to continue having a rented car in case of emergencies.

    Thus, what was supposed to be a great time ended with a busted ankle, a massive bloody gash across my forehead (luckily, I have a wonky immune system that has made it impossible for me to scar), and a horrible concussion.
    May I have the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the firepower to make the difference.

  27. - Top - End - #27
    Ettin in the Playground
     
    Rockphed's Avatar

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    Default Re: Someday, We'll All Look Back at This and Laugh

    I once flipped a bicycle and ended up screaming with my head in a busy highway for 5 minutes.
    Quote Originally Posted by Wardog View Post
    Rockphed said it well.
    Quote Originally Posted by Sam Starfall
    When your pants are full of crickets, you don't need mnemonics.
    Dragontar by Serpentine.

    Now offering unsolicited advice.

  28. - Top - End - #28
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Raiser Blade's Avatar

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    Default Re: Someday, We'll All Look Back at This and Laugh

    wow umm i havent really maimed myself but once i was playing basketall and i got tripped/pushed on a drive and i actually flipped head over heels twice on the asphalt luckily i only sprained my ankle and bruised my arms and legs
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    Look upon the Goddess and rejoice!

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    Quote Originally Posted by Vespe Ratavo View Post
    Curly, . . . you are not only made of epic win and not fail, but you are officially the greatest shipper of all time
    Quote Originally Posted by Dr. Bath View Post
    To compare [Curly] to the beauty of the changing seasons or timeless stars would be an understatement.
    Mr. Scruffy is all knowing; he doesn't believe in squid bones, so neither should you!
    Bathatars!Blog!

  29. - Top - End - #29
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    blackout's Avatar

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    Default Re: Someday, We'll All Look Back at This and Laugh

    I did a backflip underwater in a pool, and conked my head on the pool's walls.

    Yeah. Not my brightest moment.


    Town Character Nukular, now retired as my avatar.
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  30. - Top - End - #30
    Retired Mod in the Playground Retired Moderator
     
    Alarra's Avatar

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    Default Re: Someday, We'll All Look Back at This and Laugh

    I walked into my mom's parked car and broke my nose.

    I was outzombied by the baby!
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    Quote Originally Posted by Amotis View Post
    Alarra ate all my awesome and now she's always acknowledged as awe-inspiring awesome. Alliteration aside, Alarra is awesome.

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