In notRussia Dungeon explores YOU!

[2D8HP]

Um.... instead of derailing a very fine Worldbuilding thead:

(I just can't resist it anymore)

In notRussia you don't level up with experience, experience up level YOU!

In Not!Russia, Lich is quest giver!

In notRussia, inn-builders meet on adventures!
In notRussia, dragon steals YOUR loot!
In notRussia, artifact is corrupted by you!
In notRussia, ten foot pole uses you to check for traps!
In notRussia, you pickpocket party rogue!
In notRussia, spells fire-and-forget wizard!

....I'm addicted.

(There just needs to be more!)

In notRussia Dungeon explores YOU!

In notRussia YOU heal CLERIC!

In notRussia half-orc is the result of tragedy for ORC!

In notRussia Spell uses up WIZARDS!

In notRussia Feats gain YOU!

In notRussia Hobgoblins count as PACIFISTS!

In notRussia PC's don't form a party, Party forms YOU!

In notRussia treasure gathers YOU!

Please help!

[Velaryon]

In notRussia, undead turns you!

In notRussia, potion drinks you!

In notRussia, prerequisites meet you!

[RazorChain]

In notRussia you hoard loot and monsters raid your home for gold and xp.

In notRussia the paladin gets smitten

In notRussia your first quest that you get from the Lich is to clear dragons from his cellar.

In notRussia you had to pay the Lich 5000 gp for completing his quest.

In notRussia you sell treasure maps to shady men in taverns.

In notRussia you accept handouts from beggars so you can pay for your quests

[Tohron]

In notRussia the game breaks PunPun
In notRussia the Omniscificer knows nothing
In notRussia the Fighter wins fights and the Wizard tanks damage
In notRussia Commoners are OP.

[2D8HP]

In notRussia The Unknown Searches YOU!

In notRussia The Borderlands Keep YOU!

In notRussia Horror of Tombs!

In notRussia Giants Against YOU!

In notRussia The Drow Vault YOU!

In notRussia Elemental Evil Temple YOU!

In notRussia Phandelver Mine YOU!

[GnomishPride]

In notRussia, classes take you!
In notRussia, up levels you!
In notRussia, skills make you checks!
In notRussia, explosions make gnomes!
In notRussia, you hurt weapons!
In notRussia, you track ranger!

[Madbox]

In notRussia you fall, rocks die!
In notRussia, the sun ironheart surges you!
In notRussia, you heal and give stuff to villains.

[Batou1976]

In notRussia, hit points depletes YOU

In notRussia, d20 rolls YOU

In notRussia, sentient item wields YOU (okay, this can happen normally, also )

In notRussia, armor wears YOU

In notRussia, skill is proficient in YOU

In notRussia, spell prepares YOU

In notRussia, character class picks YOU

In notRussia, lone 1HD kobold slays YOU... and the rest of the party

In notRussia, party splits YOU

In notRussia, dungeon clears YOU

In notRussia, XP gains YOU

In notRussia, equipment buys YOU

In notRussia, character generates YOU

In notRussia, sword enchants YOU

In notRussia, explosion happens to YOU

In notRussia, fire is burned by YOU

In notRussia, language learns YOU

In notRussia, GP earns YOU

In notRussia, Mind Flayer is dominated by YOU (you dirty boy )

In notRussia, role plays YOU

[Doorhandle]

In notRussia, You curse mummies with mummy rot!

In notRussia, Limbs regenerate trolls!

In notRussia, Maneuvers initiate you!

In notRussia, the darkness casts magic missile at you!

In notRussia, fire is known for breathing dragons!

In notRussia, You engulf gelatinous cubes!

In notRussia, You rust monsters!

And of course; in In notRussia, Memes repeat you!

[Ninjadeadbeard]

In NotRussia, the Playground is in a Giant!

[JAL_1138]

In NotRussia, treasure chest opens you! Is because we are having terrible mimic infestation. Is very serious problem, many people killed. Please help.

In NotRussia, vampire burns the sun! He is unholy tyrant who is ruling with iron fist and power like god. Crops wither and everything freeze. Please help.

In NotRussia, vodka drinks you! Water-weird get into distillery; many worker die. Please help.

[Vinyadan]

[Black Socks]

In notRussia, you must get demons OUT OF the Abyss!
In notRussia, dungeon delves in YOU! (kinky....)
In notRussia, opportunities make attacks against YOU!
In notRussia, armor wears no wizard!
In notRussia, familiar summons YOU!
In notRussia, animal get ranger companion!

[Tiktik Ironclaw]

In NotRussia, traps make insidious kobolds!

In NotRussia, drow male in charge of drow female!

In NotRussia, Gouda cheese can't resist the taste of a fine hobgoblin!

In NotRussia, gnolls are best workers, and very Lawful Good!

In NotRussia, worg rides goblin!

[2D8HP]

In notRussia YOU eat Mind Flayer brains!

(Mix with beet, make soup. Is one of many fine delicacies you enjoy. Bring many brains whole family. We have much scenic splendors, such as the majestic Meenlock moose.)

[TheTeaMustFlow]

[B]We have much scenic splendors, such as the majestic Meenlock moose.)

Wait a minute, majestic moose is from notSweden!

...I see you have learned secret of success in adventuring from great notRussian research magician.

[2D8HP]

I see you have learned secret of success in adventuring from great notRussian research magician.

черт побери!

[JAL_1138]

In NotRussia, metal smiths dwarf! Insane automatons are kill many dwarf and make into flesh golems to attack surface. Hundreds dead. Please help.

[2D8HP]

In notRussia YOU bite Vampires!

Little joke. Hardly any Undead at all. Bring much livestock loved ones for visit. You will have a small chance of survival wonderful time for whole family.

(please send help while they're still any living left)

[JAL_1138]

In NotRussia, vacation takes you! To Barovia. Whole village swept up into mists and vanish, two week ago. I lose family. Please help.

In NotRussia, witch burns villagers! Witch is Baba Yaga. She has kill hundreds of people and have curse many more. We always are living in fear of her. Please help.

In NotRussia, vampire stakes you! Vampire impale his enemies on pikes, and setting them up on the streets as warning. We cannot sleep for the screaming. Please help.

[Cluedrew]

To JAL_1138: Your obviously not from notRussia, because in notRussia quest-givers save adventures.

[2D8HP]

In notRussia adventures give quest to strange old men in taverns.
EDIT:
(Oops someone beat me to it):

In notRussia you sell treasure maps to shady men in taverns.

In notRussia Warlock buys soul.


(OK then.....to combone a couple of previous ones)

IN NotRussia instead of PC's forming party to investigate Dungeons, Party form dungeon to investigate PC's!

(Now I'm starting to wonder about Worldbuilding this threads notRussia )

[Tohron]

In notRussia, 2nd level Commoner is more common than 1st level Commoner.

[NecroDancer]

In notRussia fire resists teifling

[Vizzerdrix]

In notrussia chickens abuse commoner infested flaw.

[Doorhandle]

To JAL_1138: Your obviously not from notRussia, because in notRussia quest-givers save adventures.

Those are the adventures. They're in over their heads.

[GnomishPride]

In notRussia, commoners steal from evil PCs!
In notRussia, gold hoards adventurers!
In notRussia, locks pick thieves!
In notRussia, fire breathes dragons!
In notRussia, undead raise you!
In notRussia, gods worship cleric!
In notRussia, players rule 0 the DM!
In notRussia, Lolth worships drow!

[2D8HP]

In notRussia adventures get map in Dungeon of the way to the tavern so they can get the treasures in there!


(My kind of treasure! )

[GnomishPride]

In notRussia adventures get map in Dungeon of the way to the tavern so they can get the treasures in there!


(My kind of treasure! )

Ah yes, the ultimate goal of the adventurer: Beer & Babes (which is really what D&D should have been called)

[Batou1976]

In notRussia adventures get map in Dungeon of the way to the tavern so they can get the treasures in there!


(My kind of treasure! )

In notRussia, tavern wench hits on YOU