How?

[Dunavar]

Hi. I'm fairly new to this, and I was wondering if any of you could tell me how to play in a game like a dungeon thing or whatever. I'm very incompetent about most things in life, especially this right now. Please respond!

[LCR]

Have a look at http://www.d20srd.org. That's the basic rules set for Dungeons and Dragons, so most answers will be there.

[Azrael]

I was wondering if any of you could tell me how to play in a game like a dungeon thing or whatever.

Carefully.

[LCR]

No, that's wrong. It's Bananas. Jimmy Bananas.

[Azrael]

Thanks to Google, an actual useful response out of me.

[Ceres]

Thanks to Google, an actual useful response out of me.

Argh! Not that horrible demo! If you decide to play it, please don't start thinking D&D is like that. I mean, it can be useful for learning some of the very basic rules, sure. But that demo is just abyssal.

[Vuzzmop]

I think you mean "Abysmal".

[Cyrano]

Maybe it's LITERALLY from hell...?

[Ceres]

I think you mean "Abysmal".

Indeed. You live, you learn.

[AslanCross]

Summarizing it as best as I can:

D&D is a roleplaying game. You take on the role of a character of a specific race and class, and go on an adventure, usually involving the violent and crafty plunder of a dungeon. The game is managed by a Dungeon Master, another "player" who controls the monsters and the environment.

Any act that can fail or succeed is controlled by the roll of a d20 (20-sided die), to which you add necessary modifiers and subtract necessary penalties. You have to beat a target number (for attacks, your target's armor class; for skill checks and saving throws, a target Difficulty Class or DC). Match or beat the target number and you succeed, otherwise you fail. Of course, never forget that your character has a personality of his/her own and should interact with the environment and other players as the personality demands.