Team Ready, Aim, Fire! Round 5

[Lord Herman]

{table]Samurai|Action
Akaziel|Self
alec|Baboon Army
Castaras|Air
Dr. Bath|Timeout
evnafets|Self
Gezina|Self
Ink|Destro Yersul
Lord FUllbladder|Shadow
Raiser B1ade|Self
RocketBard|Neodan282
Ninja|Action
Baboon Army|Self
Destro Yersul|Self
Fleeing Coward|Self
Indurain|Self
Khaldan|Castaras
Neodan282|Air
pingcode20|Air
Pwenet|Self
Shadow|Air[/table]


Samurai
Dr. Bath
Lord Fullbladder
RocketBard
Akaziel
alec
Case
Castaras
DarkLightDragon
evnafets
Ezlo
Gezina
Ink
Krursk
radikalskippy
Raiser B1ade
Stu42
Zar Peter

Ninja
Baboon Army
Destro Yersul
Khaldan
pingcode20
Alarra
Atreyu
Draken
dun-dun-DUUN
Fleeing Coward
Fredricus
HyramGraff
Indurain
Moon Called
Neodan282
PirateMonk
Pwenet
Shadow
Vampiric


Please submit your actions before Monday, 18:00 GMT.

[Raiser Blade]

arghh ummm... banzai? well at least i died honorably

[Khaldan]

Why won't someon kill me already.. Looks like i'll have at least 8 actions by the end of this..
V: You'll never get me! BWAHAHAHA!

[Castaras]

Damn! I knew I should have suicided!

Ah well. Khaldan, I will have my revenge...

[Neodan282]

The Monkey-Ninja Talk was funny when it lasted,
"Ook"
“That’s right, Shadow. He’ll do fine. Besides, if monkeys can become samurai, then they can also become ninja.”
“Hold on a minute, monkeys can’t become samurai!”
“What’s that, then?”

[Baboon Army]

Three "Ook!"s to Lord_Herman for great writing!

[Lord Herman]

I still need over half your actions - don't forget to submit them!

ACHTUNG!

I've noticed I'm spending an awful lot of time on this game. Combined with the ...in the Playground contests I also run, I'm spending over half my evenings writing or drawing. In order to prevent my head from exploding, I'm going to slow down a bit.

Starting next game, each round will take three days instead of two, and two instead of one when there are only a few players left. The sign-ups will now take four days, giving you ample time to sign up. Reminder PMs will still be sent one day before each deadline.

[Lord Herman]

“I can handle this monkey myself,” says RocketBard. “Okay,” says Lord Fullbladder, “I will go and search out the other ninja.” RocketBard raises his katana, and leaps at Baboon Army. The monkey jumps aside, and throws his nunchaku at the samurai’s head. “Ow! I’ll get you for that, you stupid little... now where’d he go?” Baboon Army has decided to run for it. RocketBard isn’t fast enough to catch the monkey, and Baboon Army quickly loses him in the maze of corridors.

Destro Yersul has returned to the throne room, where he meets up with pingcode20. “Come,” he says, “let’s drag the Emperor out of here. The samurai are scattered all over the palace, and shouldn’t give us any trouble.” Destro Yersul is about to lift the Emperor by his shoulders, as pingcode20 stops him. “Wait,” he says, “we may not touch the divine emperor!” “But how are we supposed to take him out of here if we can’t touch him?” “Maybe we can put a piece of cloth under him, and lift him with that. Or maybe...” “Hey,” says the Emperor, “don’t you know it’s rude to talk about someone in the third person when he’s standing... erm, lying right in front of you?” “Emperor!” pingcode20 shrieks. “Your highness, give us your guidance! Tell us how to kidnap you!” “What about cutting these ropes and letting me go?” “A thousand apologies, your highness, but don’t be such a wiseass.” “Okay... you could try carrying my throne with me on it.” “Good idea, Emperor.”

After his encounter with the gardening ninja, Dr. Bath has fallen asleep again. Khaldan sneaks up on him, leaves a pie at his feet, and lights the fuse. But as he tries to get away, he suddenly hears a loud clang, and finds his leg stuck in a large bear trap. “Crap!” he says, “Crap, crap, crap!” Unfortunately, that doesn’t help much – the pie explodes, piercing Khaldan and Dr. Bath with shuriken and apple pieces. Coming out of his hiding place, Lord Fullbladder immediately sees the flaw in his plan: “Hmm, maybe using one of my fellow samurai as bait wasn’t such a good idea after all.”

[Lord Herman]

{table]Samurai|Action
Dr. Bath|Timeout
Lord Fullbladder|Khaldan
RocketBard|Timeout
Ninja|Action
Baboon Army|Air
Destro Yersul|Air
Khaldan|Dr. Bath
pingcode20|Air[/table]


Samurai
Lord Fullbladder
RocketBard
Akaziel
alec
Case
Castaras
DarkLightDragon
Dr. Bath
evnafets
Ezlo
Gezina
Ink
Krursk
radikalskippy
Raiser B1ade
Stu42
Zar Peter

Ninja
Baboon Army
Destro Yersul
pingcode20
Alarra
Atreyu
Draken
dun-dun-DUUN
Fleeing Coward
Fredricus
HyramGraff
Indurain
Khaldan
Moon Called
Neodan282
PirateMonk
Pwenet
Shadow
Vampiric


Please submit your actions before Tuesday, 18:00 GMT.

[Lord Fullbladder, Master of Goblins]

What the hell is going on here? Why am I not dead? I keep trying to be dead, dammit!

[Khaldan]

DAMN YOU FULLBLADDER!
I'm better now.

[Lord Herman]

What the hell is going on here? Why am I not dead? I keep trying to be dead, dammit!

I think you're doing it all wrong. You keep shooting other people. If a samurai tries to be dead, he usually tries this.

[Krursk]

Ah, but if a RAFer wants to die, they shoot someone else and say they will shoot themselves. Because no-one will trust your word for it, and someone will shoot you. Ergo, you will die and take someone else with you. Possible someone else who wants to die.

[Fleeing Coward]

That isn't exactly true, I've been telling people I'm shooting myself for the past 3 rounds and they've believed me more times than they've decided to test if I was bluffing.

[Lord Herman]

It's 18:00 GMT, so it's about time I started writing.

[Lord Herman]

RocketBard has been running through the corridors of the palace for hours, but he still can’t find Baboon Army. Finally, he decides to go to the palace gates, and wait for the ninja to show up there. As he sits on a piece of what once was the ornamental fountain, a small man calls out to him from outside the palace. “Excuse me, my lord,” he says, “I am the pet shop salesman person of the pet shop down the street. I have come to apologise.” “Apologise?” RocketBard asks. “A man in the traditional attire of the ninja came by my shop, and asked me for a package of snakes. To my eternal shame, I misheard him, and gave him a package of snails instead. When I realised my shameful mistake, he had already entered the palace. As a humble commoner, I am forbidden to enter the palace, so I could not follow him. My lord, could you please take this package, and deliver it to the ninja called pingcode20?” “Of course, good man. But first, let me inspect the package.” “No, wait, my lord. The snakes in the package are very poisonous, and will... oh, never mind,” the pet shop salesman person says, as he sees the samurai writhing on the ground.

Destro Yersul and pingcode20 are carrying the Emperor on his throne through the corridors of the palace. Despite some problems with a few low ceilings that knock the Emperor off his throne, they make good progress, and they soon reach the palace courtyard. There, however, they are stopped by Lord Fullbladder. “So, you thought you could sneak the Emperor out of here, right from under the samurai’s noses?” “Uhm... yeah, I guess so,” says pingcode20. “You do not need to do this, ninja.” “I don’t?” “You can still return the Emperor and commit seppuku, and all will be forgiven.” “Well, you see, there’s the problem. We don’t really like committing seppuku.” “You don’t? How odd. Well, then I’m afraid we’re going to have to fight to the death. Defend yourself!” Lord Fullbladder says, drawing his katana. Still holding his side of the Emperor’s throne, pingcode20 draws a tanto, and blocks Fullbladder’s blow. With another stroke, the samurai knocks the blade out of pingcode20’s hand. He raises his weapon for the killing blow, but something stops him. He gasps, coughs up blood, and collapses. Baboon Army removes his katana from Fullbladder’s back, and then looks at the two ninja holding the Emperor’s throne. “Ook,” he says, pointing at the open gate.

Two weeks later, peace has returned to Japan. Emperor Ezlo is now emperor in name only, while the daimyos run the country. And three new daimyos have been appointed estates in the Empire of Japan – Daimyo Destro Yersul has received lands to the north of the capital city of Edo, Daimyo Pingcode20 now rules a large estate near Osaka, and a large patch of jungle has been granted to Daimyo Baboon Army. But most importantly, as their first order of business, the daimyos have abolished Meatloaf Day, and instituted a law that forbids the eating of meatloaf altogether.

[Lord Herman]

{table]Samurai|Action
Lord Fullbladder|Timeout
RocketBard|Timeout
Ninja|Action
Baboon Army|Lord Fullbladder
Destro Yersul|Air
pingcode20|Lord Fullbladder[/table]


All the samurai are dead - Lord Fullbladder has been shot by two ninja, and RocketBard has died of inactivity flu! That means that the ninja have won. Congratulations!


The medals and other awards will be posted shortly. I haven't decided on a theme for the next round yet, so any suggestions are welcome.

[Castaras]

Gauls v Romans! Gauls v Romans! Gauls v Romans! Gauls v Romans! Gauls v Romans!

[Zar Peter]

Gauls v Romans! Gauls v Romans! Gauls v Romans! Gauls v Romans! Gauls v Romans!

Seconded!

[Lord Herman]

The trophies:
{table]Trophy|Winner
Winning team|Ninja
Surviving winners|Baboon Army, Destro Yersul, pingcode20
Most wins|HyramGraff
Most kills|Khaldan, Lord Fullbladder (3 kills)
Most kills overall|Raiser B1ade (8 kills)
Survival|Baboon Army, Destro Yersul, Lord Fullbladder, pingcode20, RocketBard
Survival overall|pingcode20 (14 rounds)
Pacifist|Baboon Army, Destro Yersul, Neodan282, pingcode20 (2 airshots)
Pacifist overall|pingcode20 (11 airshots)
Shot at most|Atreyu, Case, Dr. Bath, Fleeing Coward, Lord Fullbladder, Moon Called, Stu42 (2 times)
Shot at most overall|Moon Called (7 times)
Not shot at most|pingcode20, RocketBard (4 rounds)
Not shot at most overall|pingcode20 (15 rounds)
First round casualty|Tie between Fredricus and Moon Called
Most effective suicide|Three-way tie
Largest lynch mob|Tie between Moon Called and Akaziel
Longest chain of kills|Ink (7 kills)
Longest chain of kills|Gezina, Akaziel, Captain van der Decken, Atreyu, firepup, Raiser B1ade, Lord Fullbladder
Sole survivor|Raiser B1ade (6 rounds)
1 round participation|
2 round participation|
3 round participation|
4 round participation|
5 round participation|[/table]

If you're not sure which trophies you've won, look here.

[Baboon Army]

Wait a minute...where did I get a katana? And are there jungles in Japan?
...oh well, WE WON!

[Lord Herman]

I'm considering Romans versus Gauls, but it won't be based on Asterix. I don't like to work with themes that are inherenly humourous; I'd rather take a theme that is relatively serious, and parody that.

Wait a minute...where did I get a katana? And are there jungles in Japan?
...oh well, WE WON!

You took alec's katana. And I'm not exactly sure if there are jungles in Japan, but the southern islands are semi-quasi-tropical, if I'm not mistaken. Wikipedia isn't very clear on the matter.

[Vampiric]

Well, either way, I intend to sign up for the next one!

[Khaldan]

Stupid question, but how would i make a banner to get all of my medals? I feel kinda stupid now..

[Lord Herman]

Easy way: go to the page with all the medals, press print screen, paste the screen capture to [insert your preferred image editing software here], and resize the image so it only shows your medals.

Hard way, but prettier: copy each medal individually to an empty image in [insert your preferred image editing software here]. Takes more time, but does get you a transparent background (if your image editing software support transparency, that is).

[Baboon Army]

I think I should have a "four rounds participation" meadal.
unless I'm wrong...

[pingcode20]

Talk about Freudian slip - Lord Herman can tell you I tried to shoot Khaldan not once, but twice this round!

[Lord Herman]

I think I should have a "four rounds participation" meadal.
unless I'm wrong...

You've participated in rounds three (superhero), four (pirate), and five (ninja). By my calculations, that should add up to three rounds.

edit: Hmm, those bronze cups are starting to pile up. Got to think of a solution for that...

another edit: Thought of a solution. Solution will be up soon.

yet another edit: Here's the solution: I've made a number of new trophies, that should reduce the total number of trophies each player has (while not reducing the total amount of shinyness). My apologies to pingcode20's chiropractor.

The new trophies can be found here.

[Baboon Army]

I think I should have a "four rounds participation" meadal.
unless I'm wrong...

I am sorry, you are right, and I was wrong.