A Monster for Every Season: Summer 2
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  1. - Top - End - #1
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Lykan's Avatar

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    Default See wolf. See wolf bleed. Bleed wolf bleed!

    Okay, I have funny little story.

    There once was an accident prone werewolf who created a wall of chairs and stools to keep his crazy ass dog from jumping on him. That dog was soon taken for a walk by the werewolf's father. The werewolf, meanwhile, took a nap. Or was doing something on the computer. Anyway, that’s besides the point. When the werewolf’s father came back with the dog, he found the door was locked, so he knocked on the door, in hopes that he would be saved the hassle of getting the dog to sit still while he fumbled for the keys if his son would get off his butt and open the door. Which he did, leaping the makeshift dog-wall to get to the door, and let his father in. Once he did, he promptly jumped the dog wall again, though he jumped a bit too high this time.

    Why was it too high, you ask? Because above the dog wall, there was a ceiling fan and light fixture, which the werewolf promptly crashed into, shattering it, and causing the werewolf to fall to the ground amongst the glass. “wtf just happened?” he pondered, his vision slightly faded. His father stared at him with shock, as the werewolf crawled onto the couch adjacent, holding his head.

    When the werewolf felt his head, though, it was wet. Funny, he thought... He didn’t remember being so sweaty when he got up. Unfortunately, the red on his hands pointed to something other than perspiration. The werewolf jumped to his feet, and barged through the dog, wall, helped by his father to the sink, where he promptly began washing his head of the blood and glass.

    Of course, the werewolf found it odd that, despite having bits of glass shoved into his skull, it wasn’t very painful. So he politely asked if his father could bring him his camera:

    ((contains blood, for those who don't like it))

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    The werewolf learned a valuable lesson that day: Never, ever trust the dog. Because in a way, it was mostly the dog’s fault.

    Our perpetrator:

    ((contains annoying cuteness, for those who don't like it))

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    Last edited by Lykan; 2007-08-05 at 10:52 PM.

  2. - Top - End - #2
    Troll in the Playground
     
    Ego Slayer's Avatar

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    Default Re: See wolf. See wolf bleed. Bleed wolf bleed!

    Oooh, Lykan got owned.
    But the dog... the dog... it's cute! That face just screams " giv me treatz!"
    ...

    (╯'□')╯︵ ┻━┻
    Get outa the fire. Get outa the fire. You're still in the fire. Why are you in the fire. Get outa the fire. Get outa the fire. Get outa the fire. You died.

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    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    phoenixineohp's Avatar

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    Default Re: See wolf. See wolf bleed. Bleed wolf bleed!

    Sounds like the werewolf needs some bandages, the family needs to not buy silver sharp things that hang low and the dog needs some training.

    Ouch.

    Those ceiling fans, they attack don'tcha know.
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  4. - Top - End - #4
    Miniature Giant Space Hamster in the Playground Administrator
     
    Rawhide's Avatar

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    Default Re: See wolf. See wolf bleed. Bleed wolf bleed!

    I am so glad my new house has no ceiling fans...

    "My Hobby: Replacing your soap with gravy" by rtg0922, Doll and Clint "Rawhide" Eastwood by Sneak

  5. - Top - End - #5
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Ranis's Avatar

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    Default Re: See wolf. See wolf bleed. Bleed wolf bleed!

    'Round here, jumping that high is quite the feat. Kudos to you and your jumping skillz.
    Druid-Ninjatar by the sensuous Serpentine.

  6. - Top - End - #6
    Bugbear in the Playground
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    Default Re: See wolf. See wolf bleed. Bleed wolf bleed!

    Ummm, am I the only one here thinking "How is that funny?"
    Because for shame, Lykan, that dog is trying to KEEL YOU!
    And yes, the spelling was intentional.
    Anyway, you have to get out. Greyhound, plane, boat, anything. It isn't safe for you anymore.

  7. - Top - End - #7
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    Nomrom's Avatar

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    Default Re: See wolf. See wolf bleed. Bleed wolf bleed!

    It can't have been the dog's fault. Your dog is too cute to cause accidents like that.

  8. - Top - End - #8
    Troll in the Playground
     
    ForzaFiori's Avatar

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    Default Re: See wolf. See wolf bleed. Bleed wolf bleed!

    that dog/fan combo PWN'D you man.
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    Go Tigers!

  9. - Top - End - #9
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Lykan's Avatar

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    Default Re: See wolf. See wolf bleed. Bleed wolf bleed!

    Quote Originally Posted by Nomrom View Post
    It can't have been the dog's fault. Your dog is too cute to cause accidents like that.
    He's a diabolical genius, I tell you. He's already dominated both yours and Ego's minds!

    Quick! look away!

  10. - Top - End - #10
    Bugbear in the Playground
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    Default Re: See wolf. See wolf bleed. Bleed wolf bleed!

    ^^^Naive fool! Thats just a ploy, like me pretending to be 13 when I go onto the inte- nevermind. That didn't come out right. (I'm fourteen, alright? I just want to feel young again!)
    Don't trust cute. It's only trustworthy if it has a scar the size of Nebraska and no redeeming exterior quality.
    Last edited by Cyrano; 2007-08-05 at 11:15 PM.

  11. - Top - End - #11
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    Nomrom's Avatar

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    Default Re: See wolf. See wolf bleed. Bleed wolf bleed!

    Quote Originally Posted by Lykan View Post
    He's a diabolical genius, I tell you. He's already dominated both yours and Ego's minds!

    Quick! look away!
    Can't look away. Losing control of mind. Feeling urge to buy lots of dog treats and injure werewolves.

  12. - Top - End - #12
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Atreyu the Masked LLama's Avatar

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    Default Re: See wolf. See wolf bleed. Bleed wolf bleed!

    Puppy Cuteness once again negates Werewolf Damage Reduction.

    Such is the power of CUTE!
    inner circle Legionary of Resiliance
    I love my Ceikatars!
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    Not here as much. I am out Roman around.

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    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Vonriel's Avatar

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    Default Re: See wolf. See wolf bleed. Bleed wolf bleed!

    I see the picture of the so-called "cute" puppy, and all I can think of is: Wow, that's a nice collection of books you got there. Isn't that backpack rather heavy, though?

    Good job on busting your head open. I think a good smack upside the head should drive home the point.
    -Vonriel

    "DEMONS RUN WHEN A GOOD MAN GOES TO WAR."

  14. - Top - End - #14
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Lykan's Avatar

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    Default Re: See wolf. See wolf bleed. Bleed wolf bleed!

    Quote Originally Posted by Vonriel View Post
    I see the picture of the so-called "cute" puppy, and all I can think of is: Wow, that's a nice collection of books you got there. Isn't that backpack rather heavy, though?

    Good job on busting your head open. I think a good smack upside the head should drive home the point.
    I think the glass shoved into my head excersized the point just fine.

    And yes, the backpack is heavy.

  15. - Top - End - #15
    Barbarian in the Playground
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    Default Re: See wolf. See wolf bleed. Bleed wolf bleed!

    God, what a stupid werewolf. Good thing no one on these boards are that stupid.

    *braces for impact*
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    Avatar by jamroar

    Pirate Lucky by Ceika, Lady Luck by Ego, Lucky Luke by Captain Van Der Decken

  16. - Top - End - #16
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Lemur's Avatar

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    Default Re: See wolf. See wolf bleed. Bleed wolf bleed!

    Quote Originally Posted by Lykan View Post
    He's a diabolical genius, I tell you. He's already dominated both yours and Ego's minds!

    Quick! look away!
    I was gonna say, the dog definitely looks mad with evil designs. I mean, his eyes are looking in two separate directions! Definitely crazy.

    There are two methods I use to keep dogs from jumping on me, neither of which involve creating physical barriers. The first is to grab their front paws while their in the air, and start dancing around with the dog. Most dogs don't seem to like this, especially for extended periods of time. If that fails though, I just use my knee to greet them. One way or another, they learn not to screw around with me.

  17. - Top - End - #17
    Ettin in the Playground
     
    Jibar's Avatar

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    Default Re: See wolf. See wolf bleed. Bleed wolf bleed!

    Your dog is evil, man.
    Just look at him. Looook at him.
    His eyes are different colours. He is possessed!
    Eeeeeviiiiiil.
    Nothing but a Nobody

    Quote Originally Posted by Cogwheel View Post
    Also, are you even human any more, or did you just transcend into some sort of in-joke singularity?

  18. - Top - End - #18
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Hell Puppi's Avatar

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    Default Re: See wolf. See wolf bleed. Bleed wolf bleed!

    reminds me of my friend's worst drunk night....he got a head wound similar to that...

  19. - Top - End - #19
    Ogre in the Playground
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    Default Re: See wolf. See wolf bleed. Bleed wolf bleed!

    No, bad, stop bleeding! *puts Lykan in a bubble*

    Quote Originally Posted by HellPuppi View Post
    reminds me of my friend's worst drunk night....he got a head wound similar to that...
    Worst night? That isn't too bad. Did he remember or black it out? :P

  20. - Top - End - #20
    Ogre in the Playground
     
    Penguinizer's Avatar

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    Default Re: See wolf. See wolf bleed. Bleed wolf bleed!

    Now for the necessary world domination joke: Now my plan for world domination shall commence. And for the un-necessarily stalky comment. Lykan uses hair gel.

    But in seriousness. I hope it doesn't get infected or anything.

  21. - Top - End - #21
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Lykan's Avatar

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    Default Re: See wolf. See wolf bleed. Bleed wolf bleed!

    Quote Originally Posted by Penguinizer View Post
    Now for the necessary world domination joke: Now my plan for world domination shall commence. And for the un-necessarily stalky comment. Lykan uses hair gel.

    But in seriousness. I hope it doesn't get infected or anything.
    Not true, actually. I took the pictures afte I washed the glass and primary gush of blood out of my hair.

  22. - Top - End - #22
    Ogre in the Playground
     
    Penguinizer's Avatar

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    Default Re: See wolf. See wolf bleed. Bleed wolf bleed!

    Ok, that explains why it looks like you have Hairgel on...

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    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    Exachix's Avatar

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    Default Re: See wolf. See wolf bleed. Bleed wolf bleed!

    Owch.

    Moral: Werewolves and 'normal' dogs don't mix.
    He was trying to get you out of the house!!
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  24. - Top - End - #24
    Pixie in the Playground
     
    Keymort's Avatar

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    Default Re: See wolf. See wolf bleed. Bleed wolf bleed!

    But awwwwww the DOOOGGYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    I wish I had a dog... But my stupid Parent is allergic....
    (nah, I really love her... dum allergicness.)

    AAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUURRRRRRRRRRGGHHHHHHH!!!!!!! !!!!!

    I want a dog like that one. =D
    Smile! Tomorrow may be worse!
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  25. - Top - End - #25
    Ogre in the Playground
     
    blackfox's Avatar

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    Default Re: See wolf. See wolf bleed. Bleed wolf bleed!

    This is one reason why I hate dogs.
    99% of the other reasons also involve injury.
    Therefore, I have cats. The worst they'll do to you is a quarter-inch-deep puncture wound that if you wash it, it won't even get infected.
    The Feud continues!
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    - Feud, the: The 'secret' plot to do something to BlackFox for some reason no one seems to really recall. Accusations of a government cover-up concerning the Feud remain unsubstantiated.
    Quote Originally Posted by Hoseki View Post
    Hoseki looks between Blackfox and El Jaspero. "...I think the Elemental Plane of Fire has frozen over."

  26. - Top - End - #26
    Troll in the Playground
     
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    Default Re: See wolf. See wolf bleed. Bleed wolf bleed!

    Questions: So, Lykan, you alright?

    Why the heck was the dog inside the house anyway? Don't ye have grounds or at least some outdoor space?

    My advice to you: train the bloody dog not to jump inside the house and change the bloody ceiling fan to the type that is smaller and has a secure grille on. Either the junkshops or the second-hand hardwares should have a cheap one up in good condition if there is financial trouble.

    Not-so-deep-down-inside, dogs are still predators. I know that. My family has kept a pack of mongrel half-ferals for generations. The bites, scratches, the bruises and the allergies all around are worth the companionship, the camraderie and the protection that the pack offers. We have lost track of the number of thieves and intruders they have driven away. And you know what? Most of our dogs are shorter than my knee and I'm 5'6.
    Avatarcred: HELL YEAH to THE Oneris! Ma'am, thank you, ma'am.
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  27. - Top - End - #27
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Thes Hunter's Avatar

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    Default Re: See wolf. See wolf bleed. Bleed wolf bleed!

    I am so glad you are a werewolf, because without your powers of regeneration, I think you would have killed yourself already.


    I am currently concentrating on RL stuffs. If you need me PM me.

  28. - Top - End - #28
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    phoenixineohp's Avatar

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    Default Re: See wolf. See wolf bleed. Bleed wolf bleed!

    Quote Originally Posted by blackfox View Post
    This is one reason why I hate dogs.
    99% of the other reasons also involve injury.
    Therefore, I have cats. The worst they'll do to you is a quarter-inch-deep puncture wound that if you wash it, it won't even get infected.
    You are aware of cat scratch fever right?
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    Phoenixineohp avatar by Trog!

  29. - Top - End - #29
    Ogre in the Playground
     
    Trog's Avatar

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    Default Re: See wolf. See wolf bleed. Bleed wolf bleed!

    Injured again?!? That's it. It's official. We're all chipping in and getting you one of those bear attack proof suits for you to wear around the house.

    The dog is both cute and evil. I would imagine that if a full body shot could be obtained it would no doubt reveal the dog to be a succupuppy.

  30. - Top - End - #30
    Bugbear in the Playground
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    Default Re: See wolf. See wolf bleed. Bleed wolf bleed!

    Trog, i believe a helmet would be more useful here...or a bubble...

    and yes, your dog is evil; puppy dog eyes don't affect me that much...

    But-it looks so cute!
    ...shush it...
    ...fine

    anyways, get that wound healed, and let's all hope you won't get into more accidents.
    Last edited by Madmal; 2007-08-06 at 11:01 AM.


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    Quote Originally Posted by radikalskippy
    But I must say the Izzet bunch are as crazy as a rabid goat with a rat biting its tail.
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    *ahem* *picks up megaphone*
    Attention everyone! Mal absolutly rocks!

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