LGBTAI+ #59: Will You Take This Woman To Be Your Galpal?

[Zendy]

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[Malfunctioned]

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[Comrade]

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[Mystic Muse]

Guys, this is going to get the thread locked permanently, and it's already going to get locked for multiple days. Please drop it.

[Jormengand]

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[lio45]

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[lio45]

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[super dark33]

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I looked up vids as to how to bleach my hair, it seems a bit too complicated for me to try so im gonna look up pro hairdressers, The Big City should have no shortage of them!

[Recherché]

Bleach and dying is a pretty basic hair dressing skill so it shouldn't be hard to find someone. Though if you want a complicated pattern dyed in it might end up fairly expensive. Also I don't know what color(s) you want to dye it but most of the bright non-natural colors don't stick to hair very well so you have to keep redying it

[super dark33]

Bleach and dying is a pretty basic hair dressing skill so it shouldn't be hard to find someone. Though if you want a complicated pattern dyed in it might end up fairly expensive. Also I don't know what color(s) you want to dye it but most of the bright non-natural colors don't stick to hair very well so you have to keep redying it

The colors are blue and purple so i guess thats the latter :'3

Sadly i have not much income and i have to express myself as a no nonsense guy for the time being, but its always good to plan for the future.

Thanks for the help!

[Florian]

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The colors are blue and purple so i guess thats the latter :'3

Sadly i have not much income and i have to express myself as a no nonsense guy for the time being, but its always good to plan for the future.

Thanks for the help!

Hah! Had a punk phase some more than half a lifetime ago and my preference was for shock blue spikes. Ok, for blue and purple, you have to bleach. The good news, you can also use silver and grey, which are pretty en vogue right now (at least in Germany) and far less aggressive than straight bleach.

Overall, it´s not that hard to learn, but you're of to a good start when you have someone guiding you thru the process.

[Recherché]

Hmmm have you considered a wig so you could switch hair colors whenever?

[Dragonus45]

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[super dark33]

Hmmm have you considered a wig so you could switch hair colors whenever?

In this heat? my head will boil D:

[Recherché]

Depending on where you are it'll likely start cooling down soon. Hmmm maybe I should wear my cosplay wigs instead of a hat this winter for warmth.

[Amazon]

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[lio45]

It depends how far on the spectrum you are. For some, a surrogate might work, for others, deeper in the spectrum, fantasy is not enough, only the real thing will do.

For some, a surrogate might work (implied: and be satisfying enough).
For others, deeper in the spectrum, a surrogate will have to do.

Or else they'll eventually end up in jail, deservedly so.

The real thing is off-limits and they know it.

[Douglas]

The Mod Radiant: Locked for review.

[Forum Staff]

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[Haruki-kun]

The Winged Mod: Thread re-opened after review.

As a reminder to everyone, please be sure to review the Forum Rules, especially in regards to what topics are appropriate to discuss on this site.

Furthermore, please do not attempt to carry over previous discussions from other threads, as noted under External Baggage.

[Grytorm]

Hello again. Does anyone remember me?

[Mystic Muse]

A little vaguely, but yes, I definitely recognize your username.

[CWater]

Hello again. Does anyone remember me?

Hi! I remember your avatar

[Anymage]

Just looking at the amount of time covered by the mod edit timestamps, I want to thank Haruki-kun for the time and effort he put into cleaning things up. Just a pointless appreciation post for the amount of work the mods put into keeping this place running smoothly.

[Irish Musician]

Just looking at the amount of time covered by the mod edit timestamps, I want to thank Haruki-kun for the time and effort he put into cleaning things up. Just a pointless appreciation post for the amount of work the mods put into keeping this place running smoothly.

[The Extinguisher]

I need some coming out advice. My parents are going to be in town this weekend and im having dinner with them on friday. Ive been out fulltime since i moved here, and want them to be a part of my life. I just want them to do that with the right name and pronouns.

Im not expecting it ti go bad, but im expecting insensitive questions and the like. Does anyone have any tips or experiences they can share?

[ArlEammon]

@The Extinguisher , Ironically, I wish I could help, but I'm still closeted.

[Eldest]

I need some coming out advice. My parents are going to be in town this weekend and im having dinner with them on friday. Ive been out fulltime since i moved here, and want them to be a part of my life. I just want them to do that with the right name and pronouns.

Im not expecting it ti go bad, but im expecting insensitive questions and the like. Does anyone have any tips or experiences they can share?

Have positive examples to hand. Expect it to be a shock at first. I strongly suggest either presenting gender neutral or telling them ahead of time, again to avoid the shock factor. Also, expect confusion about gender identity and sexuality: they might think this is just you trying to be gay or whatever. Worst case scenario, have the ability to cut ties. Answer questions gently but firmly: you know more about this than they do, in all likelyhood.

[ArgentiAertheri]

I need some coming out advice. My parents are going to be in town this weekend and im having dinner with them on friday. Ive been out fulltime since i moved here, and want them to be a part of my life. I just want them to do that with the right name and pronouns.

Im not expecting it ti go bad, but im expecting insensitive questions and the like. Does anyone have any tips or experiences they can share?

Can you do it in advance? Over a carefully thought out email perhaps? I went the route of "hello FB, I'm non-binary and that means...", it sorta worked?

Even if it goes perfectly, expect to correct LOTS of pronouns, particularly if you're switching to something besides s/he. Assuming you're of drinking age, maybe have some wine before they show up? Definitely have some variety of support in place for after they leave -- people you're out to and comfortable venting with. Don't be afraid to reply with any of: I'm not comfortable answering that, I don't know, I'll have to think about that. "Why do you ask?" is always a good fallback too. If you're like me and the nervous sort, write everything out on your phone and straight up read it off if you have to. Remember you can always pop to the bathroom if it gets overwhelming!

Good luck!

Side note edit regarding hair: manic panic makes a lightening kit that you can use at home, to great effect, if you can pour bottle A into jar B and stir. It's about as idiot proof as bleach can get (I've done it, successfully, repeatedly, and my chemistry skills never left grade school!)

[ve4grm]

I need some coming out advice. My parents are going to be in town this weekend and im having dinner with them on friday. Ive been out fulltime since i moved here, and want them to be a part of my life. I just want them to do that with the right name and pronouns.

Im not expecting it ti go bad, but im expecting insensitive questions and the like. Does anyone have any tips or experiences they can share?

Have positive examples to hand. Expect it to be a shock at first. I strongly suggest either presenting gender neutral or telling them ahead of time, again to avoid the shock factor. Also, expect confusion about gender identity and sexuality: they might think this is just you trying to be gay or whatever. Worst case scenario, have the ability to cut ties. Answer questions gently but firmly: you know more about this than they do, in all likelyhood.

Assuming you're right and it doesn't go badly, I second the gentle-but-firm approach. If they're asking insensitive questions, point that out, but do try to answer them if you can. Remember that they're very possibly learning about this as you're telling them, and they may not know what's insensitive yet.

Think back to when you first learned about the concept. You probably had a lot of questions that would seem insensitive or dumb based on what you know now. That's them right now. So lean on that experience and know they can get to the same point you're at with willingness and effort.