1001 Homebrew Spells

[jqavins]

2.) Bull's Grace (D&D 3.5)

When Myth Busters was testing expressions and aphorisms, the decided to test "Bull in a china shop". They built a mock-up china shop - free standing shelves with lots of breakable objects on them - and set a bull loose inside. The bull did not knock over a single thing, as I recall. He walked with ease and grace between the shelves doing no damage.

[rferries]

When Myth Busters was testing expressions and aphorisms, the decided to test "Bull in a china shop". They built a mock-up china shop - free standing shelves with lots of breakable objects on them - and set a bull loose inside. The bull did not knock over a single thing, as I recall. He walked with ease and grace between the shelves doing no damage.

Ha I'm not surprised... just because it's large doesn't mean it isn't aware of its surroundings.

I kind of dislike the naming convention for "animal's attribute" spells - a fox may be cunning for an animal, but it's still far below human intelligence; an eagle may be magnificent but it's hopeless at Bluffing/Diplomacy/etc...

[jqavins]

The Long Goodbye
Necromancy [Evil]
...
You temporarily restore life to a deceased creature. You can raise a creature that has been dead for no longer than one day per caster level...

I'd remove the [Evil] modifier. My dad died suddenly last week, with me a long plane ride away, and I would have been very grateful if someone had been able to cast this.

Force Slice (D&D 3.5)
Evocation [Force]
...
A small blade shaped force object forms near the caster...

This is making me consider a new spell mechanic, which probably should be a separate thread if discussion goes on I've begun a discussion of here. This seems like it ought to be a cantrip, but only if the caster can cast force spells. Some sort of mechanic that makes a certain caster level required, but if that is met then the spell takes up a lower level slot, for a small and simple application of advanced methods.

Wild Sense (D&D 3.5)
Divination
...
This spell gives the caster a supernatural sense of all the surrounding natural terrain... If more then one natural feature, terrain, object or creature is within the area, the caster only is given the direction of the closest one...

The caster ought to be able to detect multiple items of the same type. After detecting the closest, and within the duration of the spell, the caster can choose to detect the next closest, and so on.

[rferries]

Aw man, sorry to hear that. Hope you're handling it ok, trite as that is to say.

[Darth Ultron]

31) Crushing Cave (D&D 3.5)
Evocation [Earth]
Level: Sor/Wiz 4, Druid 4
Components: V, S, M
Casting Time: 1 standard action
Range: Medium
Target : One Creature
Duration: Concentration(D)
Saving Throw: Yes (see text)
Spell Resistance: Yes


You create a cave of earth(dirt, sand, gravel and rock) around the creature that slowly, but surely moves in, crushing it. If the creature fails an initial reflex save, it becomes trapped.

This has the following effects:
*The creature must hold it's breath or suffocate.
*The creature may not move from its position, unless it success on a strength check opposed by your caster level check. Note that successful movement does not end the spell, as the effect moves with the target.
*Every round, the creature must succeed on a fortitude save or take 4d6 damage, half of which is piercing damage and half of which is bludgeoning damage.

Material Component: A handful of any type of earth.

[jqavins]

31) Crushing Cave (D&D 3.5)
Evocation [Earth]
Level: Sor/Wiz 4, Druid 4
Components: V, S, M
Casting Time: 1 standard action
Range: Medium
Target : One Creature
Duration: Concentration(D)
Saving Throw: Yes (see text)
Spell Resistance: Yes


You create a cave of earth(dirt, sand, gravel and rock) of force around the creature that slowly, but surely moves in, crushing it. If the creature fails an initial reflex save, it becomes trapped.

This has the following effects:
*The creature must hold it's breath or suffocate.
*The creature may not move from its position, unless it success on a strength check opposed by your caster level check. Note that successful movement does not end the spell, as the effect moves with the target.
*Every round, the creature must succeed on a fortitude save or take 4d6 damage, half of which is piercing damage and half of which is bludgeoning damage.

Material Component: A handful of any type of earth.

Nit pick: What exactly does "a cave of earth... of force" mean?

General: Whoa, Nelly!!! Save or die in a fourth level spell!

[Tvtyrant]

Create Mountain Range (2E)
Psionic Enchantment
Preparation Time: 81 days
Casting time: 9 days
Range: 100 miles
Material Component: 9 gems worth at least 20,000GP each.
Focus: Helm of Brilliance


The caster buries the 9 gems used as components in the earth where they wish mountains to sprout. Over each gem the caster must erect an obelisk covered in intricate runes, a task taking 9 days per obelisk.

The caster must then wear the Helm of Brilliance while casting Create Mountain Range. The casting time is 9 days.

The effects of the spell vary based on the type of gem used. Where a Ruby is buried a squat active volcano opens, erupting continously for 1 year before settling into a smoking hill half a mile high.

Where a diamond is planted a tall, spire like mountain grows. 2 miles high and topped with snow.

An emerald creates a butte, with a small spring that renders the mountain unsually green and fertile.

A saphire creates a glacier covered mountain a mile high that melts over the next few years and provides water to the valley it creates.

After a decade the mountains begin to slump back into their original positions, sinking over the course of a year.

[jqavins]

Create Mountain Range (2E)
Psionic Enchantment
Preparation Time: 89 days
Casting time: 9 days
Range: 100 miles
Material Component: 9 gems worth at least 20,000GP each.
Focus: Helm of Brilliance


The caster buries the 9 gems... a task taking 9 days per obelisk...

Where do the other eight days of prep come in?

[Tvtyrant]

Where do the other eight days of prep come in?

Darn it. Math is not my strongest department.

I could drop it to 81 days and then keep the casting time the same? 90 days seems plenty and mathematically neater.

[Darth Ultron]

33) Watermantle (D&D 3.5)
Abjuration [Water]
Level: Drd 6, Sor/Wiz 6
Components: V, S, M
Casting Time: 1 standard action
Range: Caster
Target : Caster
Duration: 10 minutes/level
Saving Throw: None
Spell Resistance: No

The caster of this spell is surrounded by an thin layer of clean water that moves with him. Note that unless the caster can breathe water they will start to drown once this spell is cast. While it lasts, the watermantle confers several benefits upon the caster, as follows:

First, the caster is rendered immune to the effects (both harmful and beneficial) of non-magical liquids and liquid effects, as the watermantle continuously replenishes the water the caster breaths and is covered in, filtering out such things. This includes acids and liquid poisons.

Also, when subjected to liquid effects of fantastic nature (spells, spell-like effects, breath weapons, etc.), the watermantle reduces all damage inflicted upon the caster by 1/2. If the caster also makes her saving throw vs. such effects, the damage is nullified completely. If such a liquid effect is such that it is not expressed by hit-point damage (death, petrification, paralyzation, nausea, etc.) the caster receives a +4 bonus to her saving throws. If the effect does both damaging and 'other' effects, the watermantle confers both advantages.

Lastly, the watermantle provides the caster with breathable water even in a hostile atmosphere, such as dry desert or in a vacuum.

The watermantile, despite it's nature, offers no protection against fire or flames what so ever

The material components for this spell are a handful of crushed sea shells and a small air bladder.

[Bohandas]

34.) Lighter (D&D 3.5, Incantation)

Evocation
Effective Level: 0th
Skill Check: Spellcraft DC ~21 (17-26) (depending on if reduced area is considered applicable and validity of ad-hoc ruling of reduced DC for incantations replicating effects well below 6th level)
Failure: Backlash, see text
Components: V, S
Casting Time: 10 minutes (edit: 1-5 minutes)
Range: Touch
Target: One flammable object
Duration: Instantaneous
Saving Throw: Reflex negates (object) (DC 16 + caster’s Int modifier)
Spell Resistance: Yes (object)

This spell sets a single flammable object on fire. If the spell is botched it goes up in a flash that blinds the caster for 1d6 rounds on a failed DC 11 fortitude save or dazzles them for 1d6 rounds on a successful save. If a 1 is rolled on this save they must make a reflex save at DC 11 or be set on fire themself

EDIT:

35.) Slow Your Roll

Enchantment (Compulsion) [Mind-Affecting]
Level: Brd 1, Clr 1, Wiz 2
Range: Close
Target: 1 Creature per 5 caster levels, all of which must be within a 10-ft.-radius

As Calm Emotions except as noted above

[DustyHalo]

(5e)
ABSORPTION SHIELD
3rd-level abjuration (Wizard, Paladin, Sorcerer)
Casting Time: 1 action
Range: 5 feet
Components: V,S
Duration: Concentration, up to 1 minute
A blue, shimmering, 15 by 5 foot wide shield appears in front of you with 1d10 + 15 hitpoints. When an attack is directed towards a creature behind the shield, the shield takes the damage instead. You roll an additional 1d10 per spell level after 3rd.

[jqavins]

34.) Lighter (D&D 3.5, Incantation)

Evocation
Effective Level: 0th
Skill Check: Spellcraft DC ~21 (17-26) (depending on if reduced area is considered applicable and validity of ad-hoc ruling of reduced DC for incantations replicating effects well below 6th level)
[b]Failure: Backlash, see text
Components: V, S
Casting Time: 10 minutes

That sounds like a really long casting time. Virtually anyone, with very little instruction, a little experience and a match can get a good campfire going in half that time. And this only replaces the match. I would take this all the way down to a swift action, though not overriding the limit of one spell per turn. (And the somatic component should be tucking one's thumb tip into the crook of the bent index finger and then flicking it up; a small flame emerges from the tip of the thumb, which is used to light another object.)

36. (Well, no, not really)

Would someone please come up with a spell whose verbal component is "Hold my beer" and has a corresponding gesture as the first step in the somatic component. The beer itself is the material component.

[PhoenixPhyre]

]Would someone please come up with a spell whose verbal component is "Hold my beer" and has a corresponding gesture as the first step in the somatic component. The beer itself is the material component.

The result must involve a large change of extreme self harm.

[jqavins]

36) Hold My Beer (D&D 3.5)
Abjuration (?*)
Level: Any caster class 1; Any class 0
Components: V, S, M
Casting Time: One standard action
Range: Caster
Target : Caster (and any cohorts; see below)
Duration: One following action (see below)
Saving Throw: None
Spell Resistance: No

The casting of this spell involves the following steps:

Somatic component: Hand a vessel containing an alcoholic beverage (typically a container of beer) to another person;
Verbal component: Say "Hold my beer" (or substitute the word for a different drink if applicable);
Perform a needlessly dangerous act.

The holder of the beverage must continue to hold it until the act is completed or the spell fails, as if the caster were unable to cast it at all. (See below.)

The caster gains a +2 Luck bonus on any one saving throw (usually Ref or Fort) that is required to avoid taking damage as a result of the act. If the act involves more than one person, the effect covers all participants, giving each the bonus to one save.

After the act is concluded, the caster feels an irresistible compulsion (no save) to chug the drink, which thus comprises the spell's material component. If the caster is unable to drink, the holder of the drink is subject to the compulsion.**

Oddly, the mere existence of this spell causes others who are not normally able to cast spells to believe that they can cast this one. Those who imitate the verbal and somatic components somehow manage to cause a reverse effect, suffering a -2 Karmic penalty on all saves to avoid taking damage from the act. This experience does not dispel the belief that it will work next time.

* Is there a better choice than Abjuration for this?
** That's right; if the caster is injured despite the save bonus, and is lying on the ground bleeding, his (it's almost always "his") buddy will chug the drink before rendering aid.

[Bohandas]

That sounds like a really long casting time. Virtually anyone, with very little instruction, a little experience and a match can get a good campfire going in half that time. And this only replaces the match. I would take this all the way down to a swift action, though not overriding the limit of one spell per turn. (And the somatic component should be tucking one's thumb tip into the crook of the bent index finger and then flicking it up; a small flame emerges from the tip of the thumb, which is used to light another object.)

Hmmm, I was going by the guidelines for developing incantations which prescribe 10 minutes per skill check (and 1 skill check per spell level), but now that you mention it, since it's lv0 equivalent it should probably just be 5 minutes for the check

[Tvtyrant]

36) Hold My Beer (D&D 3.5)
Abjuration (?*)
Level: Any caster class 1; Any class 0
Components: V, S, M
Casting Time: One standard action
Range: Caster
Target : Caster (and any cohorts; see below)
Duration: One following action (see below)
Saving Throw: None
Spell Resistance: No

The casting of this spell involves the following steps:

Somatic component: Hand a vessel containing an alcoholic beverage (typically a container of beer) to another person;
Verbal component: Say "Hold my beer" (or substitute the word for a different drink if applicable);
Perform a needlessly dangerous act.

The holder of the beverage must continue to hold it until the act is completed or the spell fails, as if the caster were unable to cast it at all. (See below.)

The caster gains a +2 Luck bonus on any one saving throw (usually Ref or Fort) that is required to avoid taking damage as a result of the act. If the act involves more than one person, the effect covers all participants, giving each the bonus to one save.

After the act is concluded, the caster feels an irresistible compulsion (no save) to chug the drink, which thus comprises the spell's material component. If the caster is unable to drink, the holder of the drink is subject to the compulsion.**

Oddly, the mere existence of this spell causes others who are not normally able to cast spells to believe that they can cast this one. Those who imitate the verbal and somatic components somehow manage to cause a reverse effect, suffering a -2 Karmic penalty on all saves to avoid taking damage from the act. This experience does not dispel the belief that it will work next time.

* Is there a better choice than Abjuration for this?
** That's right; if the caster is injured despite the save bonus, and is lying on the ground bleeding, his (it's almost always "his") buddy will chug the drink before rendering aid.

Isn't this an extremely powerful mindeffecting enchantment? You basically give out a no save compulsion to do something stupid, and a -2 to skills.

[jqavins]

Isn't this an extremely powerful mindeffecting enchantment? You basically give out a no save compulsion to do something stupid, and a -2 to skills.

No, the only compulsion is to drink the beer. Doing something stupid was the original motivator to cast the thing. And that doesn't occur in the same instances when the -2 on saves does; the -2 comes when it is cast by those who shouldn't cast it, and the compulsion occurs only when it is cast correctly. And the compulsion usually only affects the caster himself, who knew what he was doing (or should have).

Anyway, maybe with any sort of no save compulsion it should be a level higher.

[Bohandas]

37.) Body Ward
Abjuration
Level: Adept 2, Clr 2, Drd 2, Hex 2, Rgr 2, Shu 2, Sor/Wiz 2, Wuj 2,
Components: V, S, DF
Casting Time: 1 standard action
Range: Touch
Target: Living corporeal creature touched
Duration: 1 min./level
Saving Throw: Will negates (harmless)
Spell Resistance: Yes

The affected creature is warded against bodily failure and illness. The spell grants the subject a +4 resistance bonus to Constitution, which adds the usual benefits to hit points, Fortitude saves, Constitution checks, and so forth.

Hit points gained by a temporary increase in Constitution score are not temporary hit points. They go away when the subject’s Constitution drops back to normal. They are not lost first as temporary hit points are.

[Tvtyrant]

No, the only compulsion is to drink the beer. Doing something stupid was the original motivator to cast the thing. And that doesn't occur in the same instances when the -2 on saves does; the -2 comes when it is cast by those who shouldn't cast it, and the compulsion occurs only when it is cast correctly. And the compulsion usually only affects the caster himself, who knew what he was doing (or should have).

Anyway, maybe with any sort of no save compulsion it should be a level higher.

Okay, I misunderstood this part:

"After the act is concluded, the caster feels an irresistible compulsion (no save) to chug the drink, which thus comprises the spell's material component. If the caster is unable to drink, the holder of the drink is subject to the compulsion.**

Oddly, the mere existence of this spell causes others who are not normally able to cast spells to believe that they can cast this one. Those who imitate the verbal and somatic components somehow manage to cause a reverse effect, suffering a -2 Karmic penalty on all saves to avoid taking damage from the act. This experience does not dispel the belief that it will work next time."

It seemed like it was saying that other individuals would believe they can cast but can't, causing them to imitate you with a -2 to saves.

[Bohandas]

38.) Standing Water (D&D 3.5, Incantation)
Transmutation/Necromancy
Effective Level: 5th
Skill Check: DC 24; Spellcraft (2 checks), Knowledge (Nature) (1 check), Survival (1 check), Swim (1 check)
Failure: Backlash, see text
Components: V, S, Location
Casting Time: 50 minutes
Target: One pool of stagnant water
Effect: One medium sized pseudo-water-elememtal
Range: ten feet
Duration: Permanent (see text)

This spell creates a mindless false water elemental from a pool of stagnant water. This creature has the same statistics as a medium water elemental except that it has no intelligence score (do not recalculate skills) and it's slam attacks expose targets to filth fever. The pseudo-elemental follows the caster's commands but is only capable of understanding simple orders. The pseudo-elemental is bound to the surface of the pond it was conjured from; it walks along the pond's surface and cannot sink below the surface or walk beyond the pond's edge. If the pseudo-elemental is ever knocked prone the spell instantly ends.

The caster must cast the spell from inside the stagnant pond, which exposes them to filth fever. The caster must be careful not to disturb the still water as they cast the spell (hence the swim and survival checks).

Failure: If the spell is botched then filthy, agitated, turbulent, partially enchanted pond water sloshes violently over and around the caster, causing them to immediately contract filth fever (DC 18 resists, failure by six or more means the disease takes hold with no incubation period), and must also make an immediate fortitude save to avoid drowning (a dc 25 swim check bypasses this). This agitation of the water also means that the same pond cannot be used to attempt this spell again for at least a day.

[Bohandas]

39.) Color Ray (D&D 3.5e)
Illusion (Pattern) [Mind-Affecting]
Level: Sor/Wiz 0
Components: V, S, M
Casting Time: 1 standard action
Range: 15 ft.
Effect: Ray
Duration: Instantaneous; see text
Saving Throw: Will negates
Spell Resistance: Yes


A multicolored ray springs from your hand. You must succeed on a ranged touch attack to strike the target.

The target is affected according to its Hit Dice (sightless creatures are not affected regardless):

2 HD or less
The creature is unconscious, blinded, and stunned for 2d4 rounds, then blinded and stunned for 1d4 rounds, and then stunned for 1 round. (Only living creatures are knocked unconscious.)


3 or 4 HD:
The creature is blinded and stunned for 1d4 rounds, then stunned for 1 round.


5 or more HD:
The creature is stunned for 1 round.

Material Component:
A pinch each of powder or sand that is colored red, yellow, and blue.

[The Magister]

All of the 'original' spells from my current PC's spellbook. Joker's cold fusion is the only one that I created myself - the rest are modified versions of spells from various sources: Pathfinder, Mongoose, Sword & Sorcery, online homebrew, etc. I've left out a few that would seem overpowered outside of my campaign, but some could probably still be seen in that way, but whatever....


Joker's Awaken Automaton
Transmutation
Level: Sor/Wiz 9
Components: V, S, M
Casting time: 10 minutes
Range: Touch
Target: One non-hostile construct
Duration: Instantaneous
Saving Throw: None
Spell Resistance: No

This spell creates an efflux of pseudo-sentience within a mindless construct (such as a golem or an animated object). The targeted construct gains Intelligence, Wisdom and Charisma scores of 3d6 +1 per 6 caster levels (maximum 3d6+5). These scores replace the construct's former ability scores where applicable. If the construct's new Wisdom or Charisma scores are less than its current Wisdom or Charisma score, the construct retains the old score. The spell has no effect on constructs that already have an Intelligence score.

Material Component: Scarlet and blue, incandescent blue and pink and green ioun stones, giving +2 enhancement bonuses to Intelligence, Wisdom and Charisma, respectively. The stones are worth 8,000 gp each.
XP Cost: 2,000


Joker's Binding Circle
Abjuration
Level: Sor/Wiz 4
Components: V, S, M
Casting Time: Standard action
Range: Medium (100' + 10'/level)
Area: Circle with a radius of up to 5'/level (50' maximum)
Duration: One minute/level (D)
Saving Throw: Will negates
Spell Resistance: Yes

Anyone in the area of this spell when it is cast is bound within the complex circle of arcane sigils and diagrams it creates, but only so long as they are touching the ground at the time. Creatures entering the circle after it is created are unaffected, but it is dispelled if the caster enters it. Creatures within can take any normal action but cannot leave by any means short of limited wish, miracle or wish. Attempts to dispel it have a +5 bonus.

Material Component: A mixture of finely-ground alabaster, sulfur and cold iron filings in a tiny, tightly-wrapped pouch of thin, dried cockatrice stomach that has been lightly dusted with powdered silver, costing 10 gp.


Joker's Blazing Embers
Evocation [Fire]
Level: Sor/Wiz 1
Components: V, S
Casting time: Standard action
Range: Close (25 ft. + 5 ft./2 levels)
Area: 10'-radius spread
Duration: Instantaneous; see text
Saving Throw: See text
Spell Resistance: No

This spell conjures a large, blazing sphere of embers. Any creature in the spell's area takes 1d4 points of fire damage per caster level (maximum 5d4) from the intense heat it generates unless they succeed on a Reflex save for half damage. The sphere bursts at the end of the caster's turn, scattering embers in a 10' radius before burning out in 1d8+2 rounds.

Each time a creature moves into an area covered by the embers, it takes 1 point of fire damage. If a creature spends its entire turn within the area, it must make a Reflex save or take an additional 1d4 points of fire damage.

Material component: A 1"-diameter, 1/4"-thick disc of fire-hardened apple, maple or walnut wood with the appropriate sigils burned into it.


Joker's Cold Fusion
Transmutation
Level: Sor/Wiz 1
Components: V, S, M, F, XP
Casting Time: See text
Range: Touch
Target: One weapon crafted by the caster
Duration: Instantaneous
Saving Throw: None
Spell Resistance: No

This spell allows the caster to alloy cold iron with any other metal and preserve the abilities of both the former and the latter (if it has any) for the purpose of forging a weapon. If it is alloyed with mundane metal such as steel, it merely grants any weapon made from it the hardness and hit points of the latter metal. If it is alloyed with more exotic materials such as adamantine, then a weapon made from it is capable of overcoming the damage reduction of creatures vulnerable to both materials while still maintaining adamantine's ability to ignore hardness.

This spell is first cast when the Craft check to make the weapon begins and frees up its spell slot or daily spell usage as normal, but adds one hour to every day spent working on the weapon. It the caster does not have at least four ranks in Craft (Weaponsmithing), they cannot even prepare or otherwise cast it. Attempting to cast it without this prerequisite or using the resulting alloy to create anything but a weapon causes the Craft check to automatically fail and destroys both metals. Even if all otherwise goes well, there is still only an 80% chance + 1 per caster level that the spell will succeed; failure does not destroy the metals, but the alloying cannot be attempted again until the caster gains at least one level, even if different metals are used.

Material Component: A piece of both metals to be alloyed worth at least 10 gp each inscribed with the appropriate arcane sigils.
Focus: A masterwork smith's hammer inscribed with arcane sigils, which is used to forge the weapon.
XP Cost: 100


Joker's Comestible Putrefaction
Necromancy
Level: Sor/Wiz 0
Components: V, S
Casting Time: 1 standard action
Range: 10'
Target: 1²'/level of food and water or one potion; see text
Duration: Instantaneous
Saving Throw: Will negates (object)
Spell Resistance: Yes (object)

This spell causes otherwise edible food to rot and spoil instantly, and water and other liquids to become brackish and undrinkable. Water weighs about 8 pounds per gallon. One cubic foot of water contains roughly 8 gallons and weighs about 60 pounds.

Although potions and elixirs are unaffected by the normal use of the spell, you can instead choose to target a single such object, destroying it if it fails a saving throw.


Joker's Compelling Question
Enchantment (Compulsion) [Language-Dependent, Mind-Affecting]
Level: Sor/Wiz 1
Components: V, S
Casting Time: Standard action
Range: Close (25' + 5'/2 levels)
Target: One living creature
Duration: Instantaneous
Saving Throw: Will negates
Spell Resistance: Yes

The caster asks the target a single, simple question that can be answered with a single word. On the target's next turn, as a free action, it answers as truthfully as possible; it cannot attempt to lie - directly, by omission or otherwise - unless aided by magic, psionics or other effects. The DM is free to assign modifiers to the save based on how important the target considers the answer. Asking someone whether or not they are the king's murderer, for example, involves a closely-guarded secret and may earn a trained assassin at least a +4 competence bonus to the save. Asking the village idiot, on the other hand, if he is the one who tried to break into the bakery the previous night, is likely to procure an emphatic "Yes!" without issue.


Joker's Corpse Puppet
Necromancy [Evil]
Level: Sorcerer/Wizard 1
Components: V, S, M
Casting time: 1 standard action
Range: (25' + 5'/2 levels)
Target: One corpse
Duration: Concentration
Saving Throw: None
Spell Resistance: No

You animate a corpse as per animate dead, transforming it into a skeleton or zombie. However, it only lasts as long as you concentrate. The skeleton or zombie uses your caster level as its base attack bonus. When you cease concentration, it falls at the end of your next turn, but may be re-animated with another casting. It does not count against the total HD of undead that can be controlled at one time, and may not be more than one size category larger than your natural form (though it may be of any smaller category).

Material Component: Any bone or bone fragment inscribed with the appropriate sigils.


Joker's Curse of Estrangement
Enchantment (Compulsion) [Mind-Affecting]
Level: Sor/Wiz 1
Components: V, S
Casting Time: 1 standard action
Range: Close (25' + 5'/2 levels)
Target: One humanoid creature
Duration: 1 hour/level
Saving Throw: Will negates
Spell Resistance: Yes

This spell causes the target to temporarily forget any prior familiarity they had with the caster and treat them as an unfamiliar person whom they're meeting for the first time if the caster interacts with them.

This spell counters and dispels charm person.


Joker's Discerning Eye
Divination
Level: Sor/Wiz 1
Components: V, S, F
Casting Time: 1 minute
Range: Touch
Target: One touched object
Duration: Instantaneous
Saving Throw: None
Spell Resistance: None

This spell reveals the exact monetary value of a single item for the region in which it is cast.

Focus: Magnifying lens.


Joker's Energy Lash
Evocation [Force]
Level: Sor/Wiz 1
Components: V, S, M
Casting Time: Standard action
Range: Personal
Effect: 10'-long whip of force energy
Duration: One minute/level (D)
Saving Throw: None
Spell Resistance: No

This spell creates a whip made of force energy that springs from the caster's hand (or the most suitable analogous appendage) and is wielded as if they were proficient with it if they weren't already. It has a 10' reach, deals 1d6 points of damage +1 per two caster levels (maximum +10) or the caster's Intelligence modifier (whichever is higher) and can be used to grapple without provoking attacks of opportunity.

Material Component: A 3-inch strip of leather that has been dipped in mercury and inscribed with arcane sigils.


Joker's Enhanced Research and Development
Transmutation
Level: Sor/Wiz 6
Components: V, S
Casting time: 1 standard action
Range: Touch
Target: Creature touched
Duration: 1 day/level
Saving Throw: None (harmless)
Spell Resistance: No

This spell affords the recipient a clarity of mind that allows one to perform research or craft magic items and constructs (such as golems and homunculi) at a much greater pace. While this spell is active, the recipient gains the following benefits:

- The casting times of legend lore and identify are reduced by 75%
- The recipient gains a +10 circumstance bonus on Spellcraft checks to research new spells
- Only half the normal amount of time is required to research a new spell
- Crafting magic items and constructs takes half the normal amount of time

These effects do not stack with non-permanent effects (such as repeated castings of this spell) but do stack with permanent mundane, magical or otherwise supernatural effects (such as the Speedy Crafting feat, the maester's Quick Crafting class feature or the Efficient Item Creation feat). This spell does not affect items or constructs created with divine magic or psionics. Users of divine magic may use this spell normally if they have at least enough levels in an arcane spellcasting class to cast it.


Joker's Extended Charge
Transmutation
Level: Sor/Wiz 3
Components: V, S, M
Casting Time: Standard action
Range: Touch
Duration: 1 round/2 levels (D)
Saving Throw: None
Spell Resistance: No

When cast on a wand, this spell lets it be used throughout the duration without expending any charges, but this may be done no more than once per round.

Materical Component: 1 gp worth of colloidal silver that has been struck by natural lightning.


Joker's Fight or Flight
Transmutation
Level: Sor/Wiz 1
Components: V, S
Casting Time: 1 standard action
Range: Touch
Target: Creature touched
Duration: Until the end of the subject's next turn
Saving Throw: No
Spell Resistance: No

Once during the spell’s duration, as a swift action, the subject of this spell can gain a +1 bonus to attack, + 1 per two caster levels beyond 1st (maximum +5 at 9th level) or an additional +5' bonus to one speed of their choice per caster level (maximum +50 at 10th level). This effect lasts until the end of the subject’s next turn.


Joker's Fire Stride
Transmutation [Teleportation]
Level: Sor/Wiz 4
Components: V, S
Casting Time: 1 standard action
Range: Personal
Target: You
Duration: 10 minutes/level or until expended; see text

You gain the ability to step into fires and move from one fire to another. The fires you enter and move between must occupy at least as much space as you do. Fire elementals and other fire creatures are not considered 'fires' for the purpose of this spell, nor are sources of great heat, such as pools of lava. Once in a fire, you instantly know the locations of all suitable fires within long range (400 ft. + 40 ft/level) and can transport yourself to one of them. Each transport counts as a full-round action. With each casting of the spell, you can transport yourself once per caster level. If a fire's location doesn't offer enough space for you (for example, a fire contained inside a furnace too small to hold you or a fire already occupied by a big cauldron), it is not a viable destination and you don't sense its location. If a fire rests on a surface that can't support you, it is still a viable destination and you suffer the appropriate consequences if you transport yourself to it. For example, if you transport yourself into a fire burning in a pit full of oil, you fall into the oil when you arrive there. Fire stride provides no protection against fire, so it is advisable to obtain such protection before using the spell.


Joker's Force Ward
Abjuration
Level: Sor/Wiz 5
Components: V, S
Casting Time: Standard action
Range: Touch
Target: Creature touched
Duration: 10 minutes/level or until discharged
Saving Throw: None
Spell Resistance: Yes

This spell protects a creature from damage by force effects, such as magic missile, in a manner similar to protection from energy. When the spell absorbs 12 points of force damage per caster level, its effects end. It also provides the recipient with the ability to pass through a wall of force, though this immediately ends the spell. It does not allow one to attack through the wall - it simply permits them to move through it.


Joker's Gloomlight
Illusion (Shadow) [Light]
Level: Sor/Wiz 1
Components: V, S
Casting Time: 1 standard action
Range: Touch
Target: Object touched
Duration: Permanent
Saving Throw: No
Spell Resistance: No

The touched object sheds an eerie radiance in a 60' radius, granting creatures with darkvision the ability to perceive colour. Both darkness and light spells counter this effect.


Joker's Glowing Orb
Evocation [Light]
Level: Sor/Wiz 1
Components: V, S, F
Casting time: 1 standard action
Range: Touch
Effect: Magical, controllable light source
Duration: Permanent
Saving Throw: None
Spell Resistance: No

This spell places a magical light source inside a glass sphere roughly the size of a human fist. You can control the light level generated by a glowing orb by mental command (a standard action), provided that the orb is within 30' of you. The light level ranges from no light at all to illumination within a 60' radius. The colour of the light may be altered as a free action. There is no limit to the number of glowing orbs you can create, and you can control their light levels independently or in concert. If a glowing orb is destroyed, the magic is lost. If you die, however, an orb retains its magic. Any creature with an Intelligence or Wisdom score of at least 13 can gain control of an orb simply by touching it. There is no limit to the number of creatures that may control an orb, though the orb's creator may revoke another being's control at any time as a free action.

Focus: The glass sphere (50 gp) into which the light is placed. An orb usable for this purpose has at least hardness 0 and 2 hit points.


Joker's Improved Magic Missile
Evocation [Force]
Level: Sor/Wiz 2
Components: V, S
Casting time: 1 standard action
Range: Medium (100 ft. + 10 ft./level)
Target: Up to ten creatures, no two of which can be more than 20' apart
Duration: Instantaneous
Saving Throw: None
Spell Resistance: Yes

A missile of magical energy darts forth from your fingertip and strikes its target, dealing 1d6+1 points of force damage.
The missile strikes unerringly, even if the target is in melee combat or has less than total cover or total concealment. Specific parts of a creature can’t be singled out. Inanimate objects are not damaged by the spell.

You gain an additional missile for every two caster levels (two missiles at 5th level, three at 7th, four at 9th, five at 11th, etc), to a maximum of ten missiles at 21st level. If you shoot multiple missiles, you can have them strike a single creature or several creatures. A single missile can strike only one creature.


Joker's Javelin
Evocation [Force]
Level: Sor/Wiz 2
Components: V, S
Casting Time: 1 standard action
Range: Medium (100' + 10'/level)
Target: One creature, object or force effect
Duration: Instantaneous
Saving Throw: None
Spell Resistance: Yes

This spell allows the caster to hurl a javelin-like bolt of force energy that has two effects. You make a single attack roll when casting the spell and, if you succeed at a ranged touch attack, you automatically dispel any force-based defensive spell of 2nd level or lower, such as mage armour or shield. It also suppresses bracers of armour and similar items for 1d4 rounds. If this attack roll also overcomes the target's normal AC (discounting any bonus from force-based effects), the javelin inflicts 1d8 points of damage per two caster levels (maximum 5d8). Once per day, if this spell is cast in the same round as - or in the round immediately following the casting of - Joker's energy lash, the latter spell may be immediately converted into Joker's javelin without expending the spell or an unused slot, but only if the energy lash is still active.


Joker's Lightning Lance
Evocation [Electricity]
Level: Sor/Wiz 1
Components: V, S
Casting Time: 1 standard action
Range: 40' line
Duration: Instantaneous
Saving Throw: Reflex half
Spell Resistance: Yes

A spear of lightning launches up to 40' from the caster's hand, striking all creatures in its path. Any creature in the area takes 4d4 points of electricity damage. This damage is increased by 1d4 per two levels over first, to a maximum of 8d4 at 9th level. If they succeed on a Reflex saving throw the targets only suffer half damage.

Objects in range may be specifically targeted at the caster's discretion; they are otherwise not subject to damage. Attended objects pass or fail their save with their owner.


Joker's Mirror Portal
Transmutation
Level: Sor/Wiz 6
Components: V, S, AF, XP
Casting Time: 10 minutes
Range: Touch
Target: Two silver mirrors
Duration: One day/level
Saving Throw: None
Spell Resistance: No

This spell creates a one-way passage between any two mirrors. Once the spell is cast, the mirrors can be moved any distance apart, though they cease to function if one is moved to another plane unless they are both moved there, at which point they resume their normal function. Anyone stepping into one mirror comes out the other, but the passage cannot be made two-way unless the spell is cast twice (in which case the second casting takes one minute and requires only 50 XP). This spell cannot link more than two mirrors together, though there is no limit to how many pairs one may link. The mirrors can, obviously, transport only creatures that can fit through them; therefore, a determined halfling can probably squeeze through a Small mirror and emerge from a Large mirror, but an ogre cannot do the opposite without the appropriate magical or psionic assistance. Gazing into one mirror shows either the normal reflection or whatever is reflected in the other mirror, depending on what the viewer wants to see. This spell can be made permanent, but the base XP cost is doubled if a two-way portal is made, and the casting time is increased to thirty minutes for one-way portals and one hour for two-way portals; two-way portals include the base XP cost of the spell itself in addition to the cost of the secondary mirror, for a total of 8000 XP.

Arcane Focus: Two fine mirrors of highly-polished silver, worth at least 500 gp each.
XP Cost: 500


Joker's Phantom Artillery
Conjuration [Creation]
Level: Sor/Wiz 4
Components: V, S, M
Casting Time: Standard action
Range: Close (25' + 5'/2 levels)
Effect: One siege weapon created from energy
Duration: 10 minutes/level
Saving Throw: None
Spell Resistance: Yes
This spell creates a temporary siege engine that you and your allies may crew and fire. In addition, each time you prepare the engine for firing, it magically creates its own ammunition. This makes it much easier to prepare the weapon for attack, increasing its rate of fire. However, other forms of ammunition may be used as normal, if available. The type of siege engine created depends on your caster level:

Level 7 to 11:

You may create a ballista. It takes 2 rounds to prepare this weapon for firing. The ballista is treated as a +1 weapon.

Level 12 to 16:

You may create a ballista as above or a light catapult. It takes 2 fewer rounds than normal to prepare the catapult for firing, though the time necessary to aim or re-aim it is unchanged. The catapult or ballista is treated as a +2 weapon.

Level 17 or higher:

You may create a ballista, light catapult, or a heavy catapult. It takes 3 fewer rounds than normal to prepare a heavy catapult for firing, though the time necessary to aim or re-aim it does not change. These siege weapons function as +3 weapons.

Material Component: A stone weighing at least 1 lb. or a crossbow bolt, depending on the type of siege engine created, both of which must be inscribed with arcane sigils.


Joker's Power Surge
Transmutation
Level: Sor/Wiz 3
Components: S, XP
Casting Time: 1 standard action
Range: Touch
Target: Wand, sceptre or staff touched
Duration: 1 min./level
Saving Throw: None
Spell Resistance: No

Touching a wand or staff that has at least one charge, you imbue it with one temporary charge per three caster levels. These charges work like temporary hit points: When a character uses the item, deduct the charges spent from the temporary charges first. When the spell expires, any remaining temporary charges are lost. The affected item must have at least one charge for this spell to function.

XP Cost: 5 XP times the level of the highest-level spell stored in the item.


Joker's Retributive Ward
Abjuration [Force]
Level: Sor/Wiz 6
Components: V, S, M
Casting time: Standard action
Range: Personal
Target: You
Duration: 1 minute/2 levels (D)
Saving Throw: Reflex partial
Spell Resistance: Yes

Any creature that physically attacks (i.e., not using magic, psionics, spell-like abilities, etc.) the caster suffers arcane feedback that inflicts 2d6 points of force damage +1 per two caster levels (maximum +20), regardless of whether or not the attack succeeds. On a successful save, an attacker still receives 2d6 points of damage. This damage applies only to attackers using conventional weapons; if the caster is targeted by a ballista or catapult, for example, those operating the device are unaffected.

Material Component: A few shards from a crystal hammer that was broken against a wall of force.


Joker's Shrapnel Globe
Conjuration (Creation)
Level: Sor/Wiz 1
Components: V, S, M
Casting Time: Standard action
Range: Close (25' + 5'/2 levels)
Effect: One exploding metal sphere
Duration: 2 rounds/level
Saving Throw: Reflex half (see text)
Spell: Resistance: Yes

This spell creates a small metal sphere slightly larger than a human fist that exists for two rounds per caster level. If you hurl or drop the globe, it detonates either upon impact or at a point determined by the caster, spraying metal shards in all directions in a 20' radius. The shrapnel inflicts 1d8+1 points of damage per two caster levels, to a maximum of 5d8+5. Despite what one would expect from a shrapnel-based effect, the damage it causes is untyped and, therefore, not subject to damage reduction. Throwing or dropping the sphere where you want requires a standard action, resolved as a grenade-like missile. Dropping the sphere subjects the user to its damage, but for them, a successful Reflex save negates all damage and is rolled with a bonus equal to the caster's base Intelligence modifier (i.e., items worn by the caster such as headbands of intellect or spells like fox's cunning do not affect the save bonus). You may give the sphere to another creature to use, but it requires a standard action to do so and must be used within a number of rounds equal to the caster's base Intelligence modifier or it will revert to the form of the spell's material component, which can be used to cast it only once more, as it will immediately oxidize and disintegrate if it remains unused after a second casting.

Material Component: 1-ounce polished steel sphere inscribed with arcane sigils.


Joker's Skeletal Expurgation
Necromancy
Level: Sor/Wiz 1
Components: V, S, M
Casting Time: 1 standard action
Range: Touch
Target: One corpse or corporeal undead
Duration: Instantaneous or 1 minute; see text
Saving Throw: Fortitude negates (object)
Spell Resistance: Yes (object)

Using this spell, the caster rapidly decomposes the flesh from a single corpse of size Huge or smaller, leaving behind a perfectly cleaned skeleton (as well as the flesh and organs as dust, fresh gore, desiccated tissue or any other appropriate form, at the casters discretion). If it is cast on a non-skeletal corporeal undead creature, it takes a –2 penalty on all rolls and to its Armor Class for 1 minute. This also affects corpses and undead with exoskeletons, such as ankhegs or chuuls.

Material Component: A pinch of powdered death cap mushrooms.


Joker's Skeletal Servant
Necromancy [Evil]
Level: Sor/Wiz 1
Components: V, S, M
Casting Time: 1 standard action
Range: Touch
Target: One corpse or skeleton
Duration: Instantaneous
Saving Throw: None
Spell Resistance: No

This spell turns the body or bones of a person or creature into an undead skeleton. This spell will only animate dead creatures of Medium size or smaller. The skeleton follows all of the caster's mental or verbal commands and remains animated until it is destroyed; a destroyed skeleton cannot be reanimated again.

Regardless of the number of times this spell is cast, only a single skeleton animated by this spell may be controlled at any one time by a single caster. If another skeleton is animated using this spell while one is already under your control, the original is destroyed.

The skeleton does not count against your HD limit of controlled undead, but otherwise follows the normal rules for animating and controlling undead. An undead skeleton can be created only from a mostly-intact skeleton or corpse. If a skeleton is made from a corpse, the flesh falls off the bones, cleanly or messily, at the caster's discretion.

Material Component: A piece of black onyx worth at least 50gp placed in the mouth or eye socket of the corpse or skeleton.


Joker's Skull Bomb
Necromancy
Level: Sorcerer/Wizard 1
Components: V, S, M
Casting time: 1 standard action
Range: Close (25' + 5'/2 levels)
Area: 10'-radius burst
Duration: 1d4 rounds or until discharged
Saving Throw: Will partial
Spell Resistance: Yes

When this spell is cast, the skull is infused with necromantic energy and thrown. Any creatures in the area are dealt 1 damage per caster level (maximum 10), and are slowed for 1d4 rounds as the space around them is 'thickened.' A successful Will save negates the slowing, but not the damage.

Material Component: A skull of any kind. If the caster uses the Eschew Materials feat, a spectral skull with an appearance of the caster's choice is instead produced and thrown in place of a material skull.


Joker's Superior Hardening
Transmutation
Level: Sor/Wiz 9
Components: V, S, M
Casting Time: Standard action
Range: Touch
Target: One item of a volume no greater than 104'/level (see text)
Duration: Instantaneous
Saving Throw: None
Spell Resistance: Yes (object)

This spell greatly increases the hardness and hit points of of various materials. An object increases in hardness by one point per caster level (maximum 40), the break DC increases by 25% and it gains a number of hit points per inch of thickness equal to half the caster's Intelligence modifier (both rounded up; minimum 1). Materials thinner than one inch are treated as if they are one inch thick.

Material Component: A small piece of particularly sturdy material at least loosely connected to the material being hardened: i.e., granite for stone; tungsten for metal; pure quartz for glass or crystal; hardwood, bone, hide, scales, shell or carapace from a creature with at least a +3 natural armour bonus for organic materials like cloth, leather, paper, rope or wood, etc.


Joker's Sparklight
Evocation [Light]
Level: Sor/Wiz 0
Components: V, S, M
Casting Time: 1 standard action
Range: Touch
Effect: 5'-radius of weak light
Target: Object touched
Duration: 10 minutes/level
Saving Throw: None
Spell Resistance: No

As light, but it creates a weaker light that only helps those with low-light vision. It provides enough light to render darkvision useless within its 5' radius, but not enough to allow a human to read or distinguish colour.

Material Component: A pinch of powdered firefly or phosphorescent moss.


Joker's Teleport Co-ordinates Transfer
Divination
Level: Sor/Wiz 4
Components: V, S
Casting Time: Standard action
Range: Close (25' + 5'/2 levels)
Target: One creature
Duration: Instantaneous
Saving Throw: Will negates (see text)
Spell Resistance: No

This spell allows the caster to communicate information about a particular location to the target with enough clarity to make them as familiar with it as the caster for the purpose of teleportation spells, psionics or other effects that require one to be at least somewhat familiar with the destination. It may also be used to learn co-ordinates from a willing creature. When this spell is scribed onto a scoll or used to craft another item, the crafter may choose to specify a fixed location instead of allowing the user to do it themselves (which may or may not be clear to them, at the crafter's discretion), with no change in price, creation cost or crafting time. If used on an unwilling target to impart information, they are allowed a Will save to determine whether or not the information is transferred. This spell cannot be used to extract co-ordinates from an unwilling target unless they are duped, coerced or otherwise compelled to allow the caster to learn it. If the target is magically- or psionically-compelled to provide the information, they gain a +4 bonus on the Will save.


Joker's Warding Globes
Evocation [Force]
Level: Sor/Wiz 4
Components: V, S, M
Casting Time: Standard action
Range: Personal
Effect: One two-inch globe/two levels (maximum 6)
Duration: One minute per level or until discharged
Saving Throw: Reflex half
Spell Resistance: Yes

This spell creates up to six small globes of force energy that float around the caster within 5' (the ignorant might mistake them for ioun stones). These globes grant a +1 deflection bonus to AC per globe, intercept attacks of opportunity and deal 2d6 damage in the process (Reflex half); this destroys the globe. The globes foil attacks with reach weapons, but this does no damage to the attacker. The globes can only be interacted with when blocking attacks of opportunity; they cannot be deliberately targeted, unerringly dodging all attacks. When attacked by a creature with spell resistance, a caster level check must be made as normal to overcome it. If the the check fails, the creature makes the attack as normal, but no spheres are lost, since they do not even react to the creature's presence.

Material Component: A small glass sphere worth 10 gp for each sphere to be created.


Man.... I've never noticed how.... wordy.... some of these are. Or how lazy I got with the material components. I'm the only one who ever reads them, so I never bothered to be concise. Oh well....

[brian 333]

Which brings us to 71. The next spell is number is 72

[rferries]

Magister, those are worthy of their own post (or own series of posts, even)! Some are just a little too good (joker's blazing embers vs burning hands), but the vast majority are both novel and balanced.

[The Magister]

Yeah, that one originally did 1d4 damage per two caster levels and burned out in 1d8 rounds, but my primary campaign is a pretty high-powered experimental progression to test modified (and original) rules, so I changed it. I guess I forgot to 'reset' it when I posted it. Seriously, you should have seen the ones I left out.

[brian 333]

72: Arcane Tag

Sorcerer/Wizard 5, Bard 7
Components: V, S, M
Casting Time: 1 Action
Range: 25 feet/25 miles
Effect: 1 item or individual, max 1 sq. foot
Duration: Permanent for items, 1 month for creatures
Save: Reflex
Spell Resistance: No

When this spell is cast the wizard hurls a quill made of silver or some other precious metal (with a minimum cost of 50 gp) at a target within 25 feet which can only avoid this spell through a Reflex save. If this save fails, the victim is given an Arcane Mark by the caster.

In addition to the normal effects of an Arcane Mark, the Arcane Tag confers a +100% bonus to any attempt by the caster to scry upon the victim. Additionally, if the victim is within 25 miles of the caster, the victim's distance and direction is known to the caster.

Any number of items can be so marked, and this mark can be used as the required Arcane Mark spell for the purposes of Instant Summons spells.

The spellcaster can only have a number of living creatures Arcane Tagged which equals the caster's Charisma bonus, (minimum of 1) Tagging another creature beyond the maximum dismisses the Arcane Tag which is oldest. In no case does such a Tag last for more than 30 days on any living creatures.

[Darth Ultron]

73.) Cows of Chaos
Conjuration(Summoning, Chaos)
Level: Clr 3,Sor/Wiz 3
Components: V, S, F/DF
Casting Time: 1 standard action
Range: Close
Effect: a herd of Chaos Cows
Duration: 3 rounds/level
Saving Throw: None
Spell Resistance: No

This spell summons a herd of Chaos Cows, female bovines from the elven plane of Arvandor. The Chaos Cows appear where the caster designates, but no two can be farther apart then 30 feet. The spell summons six Chaos Cows, plus one Chaos Cow per caster level. The Chaos Cows are passive and non aggressive, and simply mull about the area. A Chaos Cow will only fight if directly attacked first. The caster has no control over the Chaos Cows summoned by this spell.
Mostly the Chaos Cows get in the way, take up space, make noise and eat nearby grass. They do provide quite a distraction, and it is possible to make them stampede.
Focus: a bag and a bit of hay or grass.

Notes: An ancient elven spell created to annoy other races, but particularity humans, dwarves and orcs.


Chaos Cow

---

Magical Beast(Extraplanar)
Hit Dice: 5d8+15 (37 hp)
Initiative: +0
Speed: 40 feet
Armor Class: 13 (-1 size, +4 natural), touch 9, flat-footed13
Base Attack/Grapple: +3/+13
Attack: Gore +8 melee (1d8+9)
Full Attack: Gore +8 melee (1d8+9)
Space/Reach: 10 ft./5 ft.
Special Attacks: Smite Law, Stampede
Special Qualities: Darkvision 60’, Resistance to acid 5, cold 5, electricity 5, fire 5, and sonic 5, Fast Healing 1, Immunity to polymorph and petrification.
Saves: Fort +7, Ref +4, Will +1
Abilities: Str 22, Dex 10, Con 16, Int 3, Wis 11, Cha 4
Skills: Listen +7, Spot +5
Feats: Alertness, Endurance
Environment: Chaotic Planes
Organization: Herd
Challenge Rating: 3
Treasure: none
Alignment: Chaotic
Advancement: -

The Chaos Cows a female bovines from the elven plane of Arvandor. A Chaos Cow stands more than 6 feet tall at the shoulder and is 9 to 12 feet long. It weighs 1,800 to 2,400 pounds.

Smite Law (Su): Once per day, an anarchic creature can make a normal attack to deal extra damage equal to its Hit Dice (maximum 20 points) against a lawful opponent.
Stampede (Ex): A frightened herd of bison flees as a group in a random direction (but always away from the perceived source of danger). They literally run over anything of Large size or smaller that gets in their way, dealing 1d12 points of damage for each five bison in the herd (Reflex DC 18 half ). The save DC is Strength-based.

[brian 333]

73.) Cows of Chaos
Conjuration(Summoning, Chaos)
Level: Clr 3,Sor/Wiz 3
Components: V, S, F/DF
Casting Time: 1 standard action
Range: Close
Effect: a herd of Chaos Cows
Duration: 3 rounds/level
Saving Throw: None
Spell Resistance: No

This spell summons a herd of Chaos Cows, female bovines from the elven plane of Arvandor. The Chaos Cows appear where the caster designates, but no two can be farther apart then 30 feet. The spell summons six Chaos Cows, plus one Chaos Cow per caster level. The Chaos Cows are passive and non aggressive, and simply mull about the area. A Chaos Cow will only fight if directly attacked first. The caster has no control over the Chaos Cows summoned by this spell.
Mostly the Chaos Cows get in the way, take up space, make noise and eat nearby grass. They do provide quite a distraction, and it is possible to make them stampede.
Focus: a bag and a bit of hay or grass.

Notes: An ancient elven spell created to annoy other races, but particularity humans, dwarves and orcs.


Chaos Cow

---

Magical Beast(Extraplanar)
Hit Dice: 5d8+15 (37 hp)
Initiative: +0
Speed: 40 feet
Armor Class: 13 (-1 size, +4 natural), touch 9, flat-footed13
Base Attack/Grapple: +3/+13
Attack: Gore +8 melee (1d8+9)
Full Attack: Gore +8 melee (1d8+9)
Space/Reach: 10 ft./5 ft.
Special Attacks: Smite Law, Stampede
Special Qualities: Darkvision 60’, Resistance to acid 5, cold 5, electricity 5, fire 5, and sonic 5, Fast Healing 1, Immunity to polymorph and petrification.
Saves: Fort +7, Ref +4, Will +1
Abilities: Str 22, Dex 10, Con 16, Int 3, Wis 11, Cha 4
Skills: Listen +7, Spot +5
Feats: Alertness, Endurance
Environment: Chaotic Planes
Organization: Herd
Challenge Rating: 3
Treasure: none
Alignment: Chaotic
Advancement: -

The Chaos Cows a female bovines from the elven plane of Arvandor. A Chaos Cow stands more than 6 feet tall at the shoulder and is 9 to 12 feet long. It weighs 1,800 to 2,400 pounds.

Smite Law (Su): Once per day, an anarchic creature can make a normal attack to deal extra damage equal to its Hit Dice (maximum 20 points) against a lawful opponent.
Stampede (Ex): A frightened herd of bison flees as a group in a random direction (but always away from the perceived source of danger). They literally run over anything of Large size or smaller that gets in their way, dealing 1d12 points of damage for each five bison in the herd (Reflex DC 18 half ). The save DC is Strength-based.

Now my hobgoblins have a favorite food. Imagine the fun as ranks of hobgoblin archers and spearmen line up against a stampede of chaos cows.

Bonus: stylisly colored leather goods!

[Darth Ultron]

74.) Know Animal's Companion
Divination
Level: Sor/Wiz 1, Drd 1
Components: V, S
Casting Time: 1 standard action
Range: Close
Effect: one animal
Duration: Instantaneous
Saving Throw: Wil(neg)
Spell Resistance: Yes

This spell divines if an animal has a companion or master and gives the caster some knowledge of that person. The caster learns the general physical appearance, how long ago the animal was in the presence, and the general direction of the companion or animal's master.

This spell is quite useful in determining if an animal is just acting naturally or might be in the service of someone nearby.