Corrupt a Wish II

[ChaoticHarmony]

Granted! Life is now as exciting as Bobobo-bo-bobo-bo! Life also makes about as much sense as Bobobo-bo-bobo-bo, so everyone's face now perpetually hurts from all the facepalming.

Gods it has been quiet recently, I wish more people would corrupt a wish then make their own wish

[Extrail]

Everyone corrupts wishes and no new wishes enter the system. People fight over the last few remaining wishes as eternity soars on wishes become the top commodity and the rich would sell their wealth for just one wish to corrupt.

tPBm i didn't write a wish completely because of the wish above me.

[Crisis21]

Everyone corrupts wishes and no new wishes enter the system. People fight over the last few remaining wishes as eternity soars on wishes become the top commodity and the rich would sell their wealth for just one wish to corrupt.

Uh huh, you want to trade your entire muilt-trillion dollar estate for one corruptible wish? Okay, sign here please. In triplicate. Let me just notarize that real quick. Thank you.

I wish to publish a book.

[Some Android]

I wish to publish a book.

Fine. You book you publish is called "This Book will Literally Kill You if you Read the Title." Now the entire human race is extinct after reading its title.

I wish I - and only I - could use vulgar language on these forums and not get in trouble.

[ChaoticHarmony]

Granted! Your eye is the only one that can swear on the forum without getting in trouble, now if only it had a mouth to speak such vulgar language, or hands with which to write/type them.

I wish Some Android's eyes had tiny little hands that would allow it to swear on the forum

[Extrail]

I honestly thought this was overpowered wish granting whoops
Granted! however androids eyes are above such vulgar language and frankly hate te idea they were ever given the ability in the first place.

I wish for a potato salad

[Some Android]

I wish for a potato salad

Granted. The potato salad has a terminal disease and you die one month after eating it.

I wish I could live in the Homestar Runner universe.

[Crisis21]

Granted. You live there as the character no one likes.


I wish life was like an mmorpg, but without pay to win content.

[Some Android]

Granted. You live there as the character no one likes.

So I'm Coach Z?

I wish life was like an mmorpg, but without pay to win content.

Granted. You're a low level monster the PC kills to grind out levels.

I wish I had something better to do than just repeatedly posting on the Corrupt a Wish thread.

[Mister Tom]

So I'm Coach Z?



Granted. You're a low level monster the PC kills to grind out levels.

I wish I had something better to do than just repeatedly posting on the Corrupt a Wish thread.

You do. But your behaviour doesn't change.

I wish for a willing partner and some olive oil.

[ChaoticHarmony]

Granted! The Russian Mafia is now your willing partner in crime. With your help, they expand their influence across the world, becoming the most influential crime family in history. In return for your help, they pay you in extra virgin olive oil.

I wish for a catastrophic failure at the GLoG Headquarters in the Nexus

[Crisis21]

Indeed there is a catastrophic failure at that location. Centered on you. Everything caught in it is reduced to component molecules.


I wish to put ChaoticHarmony back together.

[sneakykitten]

Through science you put ChaoticHarmony back together... yet they're not the same as when they were first around. There's something off about them now.

I wish I could stay young forever.

[flappeercraft]

Granted, you die. You can't age if you're dead right?

I wish there was better music.

[Extrail]

Granted! there is you just can't hear it. In fact you have to listen to the worst music ever concieved. While everyone else experiences this better music according to your tastes.

I wish i owned disney

[ChaoticHarmony]

Granted! Here is Disney, a little girl's pet dog and best friend. As a bonus, just because I'm that nice, you also get to hear that girl's tragic sobbing for her lost friend whenever you go to sleep. Great wish you jerk

Gods, I wish I wasn't so mean

[Crisis21]

Granted. You are now incapable of being even a little bit mean, even in situations that call for it. The people around you quickly realize this and begin to take constant and shameless advantage of this fact, making your life a solitary miserable torture that you can't tell anyone about, because it would be mean.


I wish I could make a new wish thread that doesn't twist wishes so much.

[Some Android]

I wish I could make a new wish thread that doesn't twist wishes so much.

Okay. But in doing that you violate some super minor rules on these forums that almost nobody knows about that was just created but is still important enough to get you banned.

I wish I had Louise's hat from Bob's Burgers and that no one will ever make fun of me for wearing it.

[Elenna]

Granted! Nobody makes fun of you, because everyone has entirely forgotten your existance, and nobody notices you even if you want their attention. Have fun never talking to anyone again.

I wish I had a Hawaiian pizza.

[Extrail]

Granted! you meant a Hawaiian sand pizza right? The sand comes straight from Hawaii this morning!

I wish for a burger on rye.

[Some Android]

I wish for a burger on rye.

Granted. The bread is moldy, and the meat is made out of the most disgusting meat on the planet.

I wish there were several sequels to Cuphead.

[Crisis21]

Granted. However, they are so terrible that you spend everything you own to get the chance to Wish that the sequels had never been made and reality returns to the way it was before. Except you. You can still see the utter horridness that was the sequels that never were.


I wish for a bigger budget.

[farothel]

Granted. You know have all the gold from Fort Knox. FBI (and other foreign services as more countries stored their gold reserves there) will soon be knocking on your door for a little 'informal' chat.

I wish I could stay awake the whole night without feeling like crap the next day.

[Extrail]

Granted. You now feel euphoric bit suffer from hallucinations and your motor skills are impaired as if your drunk.


I wish for a puppy.

[ChaoticHarmony]

Granted! You get a Hush Puppy, a delicious deep fried treat for you to eat.

I wish I could play Tabletop RPGs significantly better than I currently do

[Crisis21]

You can now play them perfectly, but you gloat about your new prowess a little too much and now no one wants to play with you.


I wish my Sorcerer would get a chance to cast his new spell more often.

[MrMonsterGuy18]

Granted. He’s teleported to a room with 50 angry Atropals.

I wish I had a normal potato.

[Elenna]

You get a rotten potato. What? Rotting is a perfectly normal process.

I wish it was 30 degrees Celsius outside

[Mister Tom]

granted. Also granted as a side effect: gale force winds and 95% humidity.

I wish for the permanent bestowal, upon myself only, of the at-will abilities of a mature live incubus.

[ChaoticHarmony]

Granted! This Elder Incubus Chief will now only use his at will abilities on you, his favorite personal pet. He likes to view it as his gift to you.

I wish the result of these wishes were a bit more PG and a bit less R