Results 1 to 23 of 23
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2007-09-08, 01:12 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Dec 2004
- Location
- The Mindfields
- Gender
[Deity & Domain] The words of the prophets are written on the restroom walls...
Porcelain
Greater Deity (Neutral)
Though few recognize the fact, almost all peoples give reverence in some way or another to the great god Porcelain. When they feel ill, when bodily needs must be met, it is Porcelain who they kneel before. Even the most pious follower of the other deities will give offering numerous times a day.
Porcelain appears as a great white being of smooth, glowing stone. He most often takes the odd shape of a mounted bowl, his lips raised in song.
Porcelain's favorite weapon is the plunger. His symbol is of sparkling water twirling down a dark hole set onto a tiled background.
Portfolio: Refuse, secretions, purification
Domains: City, Commode (see below), Gluttony, Water
Cleric Training: The training of clerics is normally done by other holy men who partake of blessed spirits until they feel the call of Porcelain. A call so strong that the truly dedicated will rush to him and deposit their offering within the holy bowl.
Quests: Clerics of Porcelain tend not to travel extensively, but when they do they seek to convert the disbelievers and heretics, particularly those that instead give their devotions and offerings to Tree, or even Wall.
Those that will not convert in spite of all wisdom will be shown the true holiness of Porcelain. The infidel will be held within so that the swirling waters may cool his brow and fill his ears until he hears the calling.
Prayers: Communion with Porcelain usually takes place about the shrine and are usually lowly muttered and simple. "Oh please, oh please, come on!" or even a groaning of 'Oh god...' are standard and well respected prayers. Fervent followers in the throes of worship may even begin to speak in high pitched whines and gurgles.
Temples: Temples of Porcelain are located most often in cities and towns, though most homes anywhere have at least one small temple. Public temples are usually tiled and usually contain numerous private shrines for individual devotions. Here they may sit in meditation, reading the holy texts. One can easily detect the particularly devout as the bowl it runneths over with their offerings.
Rites: The rites of Porcelain often include great feasts of food and strong drink, with holy legumes served in plenty. One is encouraged to imbibe as much as one can so that their offerings to Porcelain will be of great abundance.
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Commode Domain
Granted Ability: You gain immunity to poison.
Commode Domain Spells
1. Grease
2. Whispering Wind
3. Stinking Cloud
4. Control Water
5. Cloudkill
6. Repulsion
7. Prismatic Spray
8. Clenched Fist
9. WishLast edited by The Vorpal Tribble; 2008-08-12 at 01:21 AM.
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2007-09-08, 01:17 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Sep 2005
- Location
- ...
Re: [Deity & Domain] Blessed is he who poops
....o.o....
*Claps* BRAVO! BRAVO!Warriors & Wuxia: A community world-building project focused on low-magic wuxia/kung-fu action using ToB.
"These 'no-nonsense' solutions of yours just don't hold water in a complex world of jet-powered apes and time travel."
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2007-09-08, 01:19 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Feb 2007
- Location
- England
- Gender
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2007-09-08, 01:38 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Apr 2007
- Location
- Pennsylvania
- Gender
Re: [Deity & Domain] Blessed are the swirling waters...
Clever, interesting, and even kind of cool, but still, ewwwwwwwwwwwww. However, I myself have been found on my knees before the great Porcelain, dreading what is coming, and hoping for mercy.
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2007-09-09, 11:21 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Dec 2004
- Location
- The Mindfields
- Gender
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2007-09-09, 12:45 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Dec 2006
- Location
- In the Playground
Re: [Deity & Domain] Blessed are the swirling waters...
AAAAOOOOH GOD.
That is a very nice balance of awesome and disturbing.
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2007-09-09, 01:33 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Jul 2007
- Location
- mother of all saints
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2007-09-09, 01:43 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Nov 2005
- Location
- Flawse Fell, Geordieland
Re: [Deity & Domain] Blessed are the swirling waters...
Bwah-hah-hah! You utter mentalist! This is fantastic.
Eugh!
I am looking forward to hearing more about Porcelain's prophet and great proselytiser, the blessed St. Armitage Shanks.
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2007-09-09, 11:05 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Apr 2006
- Location
- Oklahoma, where the air elementals carry brooms
- Gender
Re: [Deity & Domain] Blessed are the swirling waters...
Well, I just found my diety for that half-orc cleric I had swimming in my head. :) I'm curious, though, why Wish as the 9th level domain spell for Commode?
Avatar gladly adopted from Ink!
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2007-09-09, 11:37 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- May 2007
- Location
- The Southern Wildlands
- Gender
Re: [Deity & Domain] Blessed are the swirling waters...
"PLEASE... AUUUGHH PLEASE COME ON!"
*splorch*
"Ahhhh... Better."
------------
Does this answer your question?
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2007-09-09, 11:44 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Jan 2007
- Location
- GMT -5
- Gender
Re: [Deity & Domain] Blessed are the swirling waters...
I concur with my fellow Townie Draken. This is extremely disgusting, and yet it has a certain degree of awesome.
I follow a general rule: better to ask and be told no than not to ask at all.
Shadeblight by KennyPyro
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2007-09-10, 07:07 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Jul 2006
- Location
- Northen Virginia
- Gender
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2007-09-10, 09:44 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Dec 2004
- Location
- The Mindfields
- Gender
Re: [Deity & Domain] Blessed are the swirling waters...
Amen, my brutha!
Btw, for some reason these slightly paraphrased lyrics from one of Simon and Garfunkle's songs came to mind...
And the people bowed and prayed
To the neon God they made.
And the sign flashed out its warning,
In the words that it was forming.
And the signs said, the words of the prophets
Are written on the restroom walls
And tenement halls.
And whispered in the sounds of silence...
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2007-09-10, 09:53 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Jun 2006
- Location
- Poland
- Gender
Re: [Deity & Domain] Blessed are the swirling waters...
This is in equal parts awesome and weird. But why Prismatic Spray as domain spell?
You know, in my next campaign I wanted to play a cleric of Helm. But now I just wonder how to justify Porcelain appearing in FR pantheon.Last edited by Morty; 2007-09-10 at 09:54 AM.
My FFRP characters. Avatar by Ashen Lilies. Sigatars by Ashen Lilies, Gullara and Purple Eagle.
Interested in the Nexus FFRP setting? See our Discord server.
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2007-09-10, 10:20 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Dec 2004
- Location
- The Mindfields
- Gender
Re: [Deity & Domain] Blessed are the swirling waters...
Last edited by The Vorpal Tribble; 2007-09-10 at 10:22 AM.
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2007-09-10, 12:05 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Aug 2007
- Location
- Bat country-- don't stop!
- Gender
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2007-09-10, 12:08 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Jul 2007
- Location
- The Middle of September
Re: [Deity & Domain] Blessed are the swirling waters...
Run for the hills!
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2007-09-10, 12:15 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Nov 2005
- Location
- Flawse Fell, Geordieland
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2007-09-10, 01:38 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Dec 2004
- Location
- I wish I knew...
- Gender
Re: [Deity & Domain] The words of the prophets are written on the restroom walls...
But I thought his name was Ralph...
SpoilerQuite possibly, the best rebuttal I have ever witnessed.
Joker Bard - the DM's solution to the Batman Wizard.
Takahashi no Onisan - The scariest Samurai alive
Incarnum and YOU: a reference guide
Soulmelds, by class and slot: Another Incarnum reference
Multiclassing for Newbies: A reference guide for the rest of us
My homebrew world in progress: Falcora
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2007-09-21, 08:51 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Dec 2004
- Location
- The Mindfields
- Gender
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2007-09-21, 09:03 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Mar 2007
- Location
- on the computer
- Gender
Re: [Deity & Domain] The words of the prophets are written on the restroom walls...
Reminds me of Anoia, Goddess of Things That Get Stuck in Drawers.
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2007-09-21, 09:10 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Sep 2007
Re: [Deity & Domain] The words of the prophets are written on the restroom walls...
*Roflcoptors across the world*
Dude, you WIN. You straight-up WIN.
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2007-09-21, 11:09 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Jul 2007
- Location
- somewhere n florida
- Gender
Re: [Deity & Domain] The words of the prophets are written on the restroom walls...
I have an idea for my next character...
St. Ralfen Thejonn, cleric of Procelin, and greatest long-distant pisser of all time!