Support the GITP forums on Patreon
Help support GITP's forums (and ongoing server maintenance) via Patreon
Results 1 to 7 of 7
  1. - Top - End - #1
    Pixie in the Playground
    Join Date
    Oct 2016

    Default Patron of the Untouchable

    This is my first attempt at this subclass, and it is driving me up a wall. I will take criticism to all of it, but I would like to make sure her level 1 abilities are solid as we will be playing in a couple days. This is supposed to be based off of Rogue from the Xmen (with some RPG liberties taken here and there)

    PATRON OF THE UNTOUCHABLE
    ---------------------------------------------------------------------
    Where did this power come from? Where you cursed for a misdeed? Did you make a deal with some force, only to have it backfire upon you? Perhaps you were born wit this curse, etched onto your very soul. No matter the source, your very touch spells pain and death for those you come into contact with. Be careful, as to not harm those you may call friends. But hope can be found even in the most dire of times. Use your power. Take your goals.


    EXPANDED SPELLS LIST

    1st: Wrathful Smite, Compelled Duel
    2nd: Branding Smite, Detect Thoughts
    3rd: Blinding Smite, Haster
    4th: Staggering Smite, Death Ward
    5th: Banishing Smite, Modify Memory


    TOUCH OF POWER

    Your very touch contains much power. Use it to slay those in your way, either in combat, or by treachery. At first level, the damage you do when attacking unarmed or touching someone at all is equal to 1d4 + Charisma Modifier. This dice becomes 1d6 at 6th level, 1d8 at 11th, and 1d10 and 14th level. When you deal damage to someone with this unarmed attack, you gain half the damage done (rounded down, minimum of 1) as temporary health. You do not gain the temporary health if the target is undead or a construct.

    Also at this level, all of your damaging cantrips have their range changed to touch and can not be changed by any means. For these, you may choose to roll against AC or force a saving throw. You also gain eldritch burst as a replacement for eldritch blast. You may not gain temporary health from damaging cantrips due to your touch.



    DON'T TOUCH ME

    At 6th level, you may punish those who try to do you harm. As a reaction to taking damage, you may attempt to take some of their life force as penance. Make a single unarmed attack against the invader with advantage. If it succeeds, instead of gaining temporary health, gain it back as health points. You do not gain health if the target is undead or a contruct.

    SURPRISE STRIKE

    You have two hands. Make the most of it. At 10th level, once per turn when you use your action to cast a spell, you may make one unarmed strike against a creature within 5 feet of you. Conversely, if you use your action to make an unarmed attack, you may cast a cantrip as a bonus action.


    ABSORPTION

    Starting at 14th level, your powers have grown to incredible new heights. When you successfully make an unarmed attack, you make attempt to absorb some of the targets power and make it your own. The target must make a Constitution saving throw, or else lose 2 ability score, 1 AC, or access to a spell or ability, while you gain these things (at the DM's discretion). You may only have one stolen power at a time, and they leave at a short rest. If you make another unarmed attack and choose to steal a new power, the old one is released. You may hold an extra power once you hit 18th level.


    ELDRITCH BURST
    1 action
    Touch
    V, S
    Instantaneous


    Make a melee spell attack. On a hit, the target take 1d10 force damage. Invocations that would effect eldritch blast effect this spell.

    At higher levels, beams will burst from a target that was targeted. Each beam has a range of 60 feet and gains advantage if the original target was successfully hit. There is 1 beam at 5th level, 2 at 11th, and 3 at 17th level.
    Last edited by gavinator154; 2018-07-19 at 03:08 PM.

  2. - Top - End - #2
    Dwarf in the Playground
     
    RogueGuy

    Join Date
    Apr 2017
    Location
    The Devil's Playground
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: Patron of the Untouchable

    Quote Originally Posted by gavinator154 View Post
    This is my first attempt at this subclass, and it is driving me up a wall. I will take criticism to all of it, but I would like to make sure her level 1 abilities are solid as we will be playing in a couple days. This is supposed to be based off of Rogue from the Xmen (with some RPG liberties taken here and there)

    PATRON OF THE UNTOUCHABLE
    ---------------------------------------------------------------------
    Where did this power come from? Where you cursed for a misdeed? Did you make a deal with some force, only to have it backfire upon you? Perhaps you were born wit this curse, etched onto your very soul. No matter the source, your very touch spells pain and death for those you come into contact with. Be careful, as to not harm those you may call friends. But hope can be found even in the most dire of times. Use your power. Take your goals.


    EXPANDED SPELLS LIST

    1st: Wrathful Smite, Compelled Duel
    2nd: Branding Smite, Detect Thoughts
    3rd: Blinding Smite, Haster
    4th: Staggering Smite, Death Ward
    5th: Banishing Smite, Modify Memory


    TOUCH OF POWER

    Your very touch contains much power. Use it to slay those in your way, either in combat, or by treachery. At first level, the damage you do when attacking unarmed or touching someone at all is equal to 1d4 + Charisma Modifier. This dice becomes 1d6 at 6th level, 1d8 at 11th, and 1d10 and 14th level. When you deal damage to someone with this unarmed attack, you gain half the damage done (rounded down, minimum of 1) as temporary health. You do not gain the temporary health if the target is undead or a construct.

    Also at this level, all of your damaging cantrips have their range changed to touch and can not be changed by any means. For these, you may choose to roll against AC or force a saving throw. You also gain eldritch burst as a replacement for eldritch blast. You may not gain temporary health from damaging cantrips due to your touch.



    DON'T TOUCH ME

    At 6th level, you may punish those who try to do you harm. As a reaction to taking damage, you may attempt to take some of their life force as penance. Make a single unarmed attack against the invader with advantage. If it succeeds, instead of gaining temporary health, gain it back as health points. You do not gain health if the target is undead or a contruct.

    SURPRISE STRIKE

    You have two hands. Make the most of it. At 10th level, once per turn when you use your action to cast a spell, you may make one unarmed strike against a creature within 5 feet of you. Conversely, if you use your action to make an unarmed attack, you may cast a cantrip as a bonus action.


    ABSORPTION

    Starting at 14th level, your powers have grown to incredible new heights. When you successfully make an unarmed attack, you make attempt to absorb some of the targets power and make it your own. The target must make a Constitution saving throw, or else lose 2 ability score, 1 AC, or access to a spell or ability, while you gain these things (at the DM's discretion). You may only have one stolen power at a time, and they leave at a short rest. If you make another unarmed attack and choose to steal a new power, the old one is released. You may hold an extra power once you hit 18th level.


    ELDRITCH BURST
    1 action
    Touch
    V, S
    Instantaneous


    Make a melee spell attack. On a hit, the target take 1d10 force damage. Invocations that would effect eldritch blast effect this spell.

    At higher levels, beams will burst from a target that was targeted. Each beam has a range of 60 feet and gains advantage if the original target was successfully hit. There is 1 beam at 5th level, 2 at 11th, and 3 at 17th level.
    You have done a good job of using Rogue as a archetype. Maybe if you could keep the spells, though... as a sorcerer?

  3. - Top - End - #3
    Pixie in the Playground
    Join Date
    Oct 2016

    Default Re: Patron of the Untouchable

    Quote Originally Posted by Sir Brett Nortj View Post
    You have done a good job of using Rogue as a archetype. Maybe if you could keep the spells, though... as a sorcerer?
    Thank you, I was going for the Rogue in D&D feel. What do you mean though to keep spells as a sorcerer? Like do this as a sorcerer subclass instead?

  4. - Top - End - #4
    Dwarf in the Playground
     
    RogueGuy

    Join Date
    Apr 2017
    Location
    The Devil's Playground
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: Patron of the Untouchable

    Quote Originally Posted by gavinator154 View Post
    Thank you, I was going for the Rogue in D&D feel. What do you mean though to keep spells as a sorcerer? Like do this as a sorcerer subclass instead?
    As in absorb and use the spells like a sorcerer, from then on, with calculated spell points, which means they cannot cast certain spells, or a wild talent, if you will?

    Or, hell, absorb some feats and skills?

  5. - Top - End - #5
    Pixie in the Playground
    Join Date
    Oct 2016

    Default Re: Patron of the Untouchable

    Quote Originally Posted by Sir Brett Nortj View Post
    As in absorb and use the spells like a sorcerer, from then on, with calculated spell points, which means they cannot cast certain spells, or a wild talent, if you will?

    Or, hell, absorb some feats and skills?
    I would be more worried, but luckily, those are skills for a 14th level warlock, so I have time to worry
    The other thing is to remember that the only thing you are guaranteed is the ability or AC steal, any other abilities that can be stolen must go through ME first. I can stop her from getting anything ridiculous at too low a level.

  6. - Top - End - #6
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Flumph

    Join Date
    Feb 2012

    Default Re: Patron of the Untouchable

    The touch attack is a decent mechanic and you do a good job expanding on it. The largest problem I see though is that you wanted something mechanically but the flavor doesn't really line up.
    1. You give them a smite spell each level including the really powerful Banishing Smite. This is really stepping on the Paladin as you get it at 9 and they get it at 17. This needs more utility to complete the untouchable theme.
    2. Your first level could actually be more powerful. At least start at a 1d6 if not small utility.
    3. Your sixth level really doesn't line up with the flavor of either the name or theme. It is also broken as you can go around and have small animals peck or bite you to gain infinite healing.
    4. 10th level is good as is. It does what you want and isn't unbalanced.
    5. 14th level is decent but what constitutes an ability? Many abilities is a resource with many others depending on it? Again is this really going along with the theme?
    6. Eldritch Burst is really unnecessary.
    Last edited by Amnoriath; 2018-07-22 at 07:59 PM.

  7. - Top - End - #7
    Pixie in the Playground
    Join Date
    Oct 2016

    Default Re: Patron of the Untouchable

    Quote Originally Posted by Amnoriath View Post
    The touch attack is a decent mechanic and you do a good job expanding on it. The largest problem I see though is that you wanted something mechanically but the flavor doesn't really line up.
    1. You give them a smite spell each level including the really powerful Banishing Smite. This is really stepping on the Paladin as you get it at 9 and they get it at 17. This needs more utility to complete the untouchable theme.
    2. Your first level could actually be more powerful. At least start at a 1d6 if not small utility.
    3. Your sixth level really doesn't line up with the flavor of either the name or theme. It is also broken as you can go around and have small animals peck or bite you to gain infinite healing.
    4. 10th level is good as is. It does what you want and isn't unbalanced.
    5. 14th level is decent but what constitutes an ability? Many abilities is a resource with many others depending on it? Again is this really going along with the theme?
    6. Eldritch Burst is really unnecessary.
    Thanks you for the response. It is kinda odd in a lot of ways, but to be fair this is a weird thing to try to make.

    1. I agree, the smites are kinda an odd choice. The expanded list was one of my last thoughts
    2. I could get behind some other utility. Any suggestions? The reason the dice are as they are is they are based on the monk unarmed attack.
    3. This ability is kinda odd. It took a while to think this up and it is more based on the person who is playing the class more so. Also, I hadn't thought about that way to constantly heal. This one could use some definite help.
    4. Thanks. I liked the idea of extra attack, but since temp hp goes away when you gain more, it just wasn't that good,so the free cantrip seemed nice.
    5. It is meant to be vague. The only guaranteed things are the ability score and AC, but depending on the foe and how she is doing, I may let her cast a free spell, or use one of the classes feature once. It give me room to wiggle.
    6. I added it bc I couldn't think of a way to make it a touch spell. Making all the beams hit one target seemed mean and kinda limiting. To be fair, she actually prefers the cantrip lightning lure XD

    Thank you again for the great criticism.

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •