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  1. - Top - End - #1111
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    Telok's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing XII: A Thousand-Yard Stare is not Permiss

    * All "refluffing" must now be preapproved by the entire table before the session begins no matter how official and "it's written in the book" the refluffing is.

    ** No. Not even if I provide page references, web comic examples, and developer tweets.

    *** No. Not even if it's in a dance fight.

    **** I may no longer, under any circumstances, use the phrase "The monk twerks the mind flayer in the face for 22 damage." No exceptions.
    Last edited by Telok; 2021-01-17 at 04:30 PM.

  2. - Top - End - #1112
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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing XII: A Thousand-Yard Stare is not Permiss

    Quote Originally Posted by Telok View Post
    * All "refluffing" must now be preapproved by the entire table before the session begins no matter how official and "it's written in the book" the refluffing is.

    ** No. Not even if I provide page references, web comic examples, and developer tweets.

    *** No. Not even if it's in a dance fight.

    **** I may no longer, under any circumstances, use the phrase "The monk twerks the mind flayer in the face for 22 damage." No exceptions.
    ...Let me guess, the “monk unarmed strikes can use any part of the body” thing?
    Cool elan (no not that kind) Illithid Slayer by linkele.

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  3. - Top - End - #1113
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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing XII: A Thousand-Yard Stare is not Permiss

    * If my fighter encounters a cursed item that turns him female, the proper response is not threatening to track down whoever set it out and make them female 'the old-fashioned way'.

    ** If, furthermore, said cursed item is going to cause him/her to give birth to... armoured, magic-eating, rat-sized quadrupedal... things... in about two months, it probably deserves more consideration than 'find a pit trap to give birth into later'.

  4. - Top - End - #1114
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    RogueGuy

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing XII: A Thousand-Yard Stare is not Permiss

    Quote Originally Posted by TeChameleon View Post
    * If my fighter encounters a cursed item that turns him female, the proper response is not threatening to track down whoever set it out and make them female 'the old-fashioned way'.

    .
    no, no, you have it about right.

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    the first half of the meaning of life is that there isn't one.

  5. - Top - End - #1115
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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing XII: A Thousand-Yard Stare is not Permiss

    * If the demon lord demands a tribute of blood, I may not slip in some malaria
    ** Or AIDS
    *** Or leukemia
    **** Special genetically engineered leukemia that produces tetrodotoxin is right out.

  6. - Top - End - #1116
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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing XII: A Thousand-Yard Stare is not Permiss

    *If I'm a wizard, I should not buff myself to be a better fighter than the fighter, or summon 4 extra fighters.
    *As a Hexblade Warlock or Tomelock with Booming Blade and Shillelagh, I should not buff myself with Armor of Agathys, and then proceed to engage in a 1v1 melee fight with the local warewolf that terorises the village, only to have him running away from me crying for mercy.
    *I will no logner fireball a Hag and her hoard of zombies when she threatens my group, before she has her evil moment.
    *I should not become Colosal and stomp on the BBEG of the game the first time I meet him, leaving him dead and then have my pal disintergrating his body, as he was supposed to beat us for dramatic tension.
    *I shall not play an evil necromancer in a party full of goody-two-shoes. And, if I do, I should know better than having "if I raise them as undead we can be a happy party" as my character goal
    *Murdering someone just because he has a collection of demon-worshiping stuff in his home or laughs maniacly anouncing that the evil of this land will kill us all is no excuse and does not stand in court. It's still murder-hobo behaviour, just with extra steps.

    Please help/contribute in creating the: Complete list of Magically Created Constructs, Elementals etc

  7. - Top - End - #1117
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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing XII: A Thousand-Yard Stare is not Permiss

    Quote Originally Posted by dspeyer View Post
    * If the demon lord demands a tribute of blood, I may not slip in some malaria
    ** Or AIDS
    *** Or leukemia
    **** Special genetically engineered leukemia that produces tetrodotoxin is right out.
    * Trying to sabotage the gnolls' blood pool by having the ranger poop in it will have consequences

    (on the plus side, the homebrewed "black pooding" the DM sicked on us was a...unique encounter)
    Hi, I'm back, I guess. ^_^
    I stream LPs of single player games on Twitch! Mon, Wed & Fri; currently playing: Night in the Woods (Mon/Wed) and Ace Attorney (Fri)

  8. - Top - End - #1118
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    RedWizardGuy

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing XII: A Thousand-Yard Stare is not Permiss

    * When the ferryman says that the charge for the river crossing is a pound of flesh, I am no longer allowed to cut off one of his limbs and tell him to keep the change.

    (Actually, that's not true, the DM loved that!)

  9. - Top - End - #1119
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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing XII: A Thousand-Yard Stare is not Permiss

    Quote Originally Posted by Telwar View Post
    * When the ferryman says that the charge for the river crossing is a pound of flesh, I am no longer allowed to cut off one of his limbs and tell him to keep the change.

    (Actually, that's not true, the DM loved that!)
    *w h e e z e*

    Okay, that's hilarious.
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  10. - Top - End - #1120
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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing XII: A Thousand-Yard Stare is not Permiss

    * Being under a curse is only negative ECL if the curse affects you.
    ** Requesting a curse of "-6 to all perform(dance) checks" and then challenging enemies to dance-offs before fighting to the death with conventional weapons doesn't count.

    (Unlike most of the entries I post, our GM actually did ban this one)

  11. - Top - End - #1121
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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing XII: A Thousand-Yard Stare is not Permiss

    * The Chuunin Exams may not be replaced by a Shinobi Battle Royale with shrinking chakra walls as more of them are eliminated from the competition
    **Not even if the they are being held in Kirigakure
    *** Even if the Genin attending have the numbers for it and even if only one Genin ever becomes Chuunin anyways
    My Fan Fiction:
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  12. - Top - End - #1122
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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing XII: A Thousand-Yard Stare is not Permiss

    Quote Originally Posted by Lord Raziere View Post
    * The Chuunin Exams may not be replaced by a Shinobi Battle Royale with shrinking chakra walls as more of them are eliminated from the competition
    **Not even if the they are being held in Kirigakure
    *** Even if the Genin attending have the numbers for it and even if only one Genin ever becomes Chuunin anyways
    ***May not break out of the Ring, Drag the Mizukage back in, immediately throw them into the wall, declare myself the new Mizukage, and immediately seize all of the Village's resources and give them to my actual village.
    I also answer to Bookmark and Shadow Claw.

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    Spoiler: Ode To Meteors, By zimmerwald
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    Quote Originally Posted by zimmerwald1915 View Post
    Meteor
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    You soar your
    Way down the air
    To the floor
    Where my other
    Rocks
    Are.

  13. - Top - End - #1123
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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing XII: A Thousand-Yard Stare is not Permiss

    * No more having an explicit, inclusive equipment lists.
    ** My characters are assumed to be wearing pants.
    *** No having exclusive equipment lists. My spell component pouch is now an explicit, inclusive equipment sub-list.
    **** Despite having no "cost" a 1/2 lb chunk of guano and sulfer is right out.
    ***** No more repurposing spell components into stink bombs & death traps.
    Niven's Laws, #5
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  14. - Top - End - #1124
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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing XII: A Thousand-Yard Stare is not Permiss

    *Pokemon and Cyberpunk don't mix.
    **Can't do a game about people who were combined with pokemon against their will by a corrupt megacorp that owns the league
    ***A party that consists of a cyborg whose grafts were created by retro engineering various steel type and "living object pokemon," a man whose limbs were replaced with modified symbiotic Beldoms that assimilate more and more of his biomass as they evolve and fuse with each other, a girl who got the detective Pikachu treatment with a ghastly, and three people forcibly mutated into human/pokemon hybrids—one an Evee, one a Slugma, and one a Magikarp—can not possibly work as a group.
    ****it's hard to take down a megacorp when half the party likes the mods they were given.
    *****Can't just decide "screw society, I'm gonna live as a Pokemon out in the wilderness"
    ******Must not ignore that most people would think being part Pokemon is cool and that the PCs would probably be celebrities... and the Mgacorp's tech would make a fortune.
    *******Cannot go on a long rant about how a human/Magikarp hybrid, combined properly, would be the ultimate amphibious super soldier even ignoring the potential for a human to harness the power of Gyarados.
    ********Cannot ignore the "only four moves at a time rule."
    *********As always, PCs are expected to be wearing pants.
    I also answer to Bookmark and Shadow Claw.

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    Spoiler: Ode To Meteors, By zimmerwald
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    Quote Originally Posted by zimmerwald1915 View Post
    Meteor
    You are a meteor
    Falling star
    You soar your
    Way down the air
    To the floor
    Where my other
    Rocks
    Are.

  15. - Top - End - #1125
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    BardGuy

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing XII: A Thousand-Yard Stare is not Permiss

    Quote Originally Posted by Rater202 View Post
    *Pokemon and Cyberpunk don't mix.
    **Can't do a game about people who were combined with pokemon against their will by a corrupt megacorp that owns the league
    ***A party that consists of a cyborg whose grafts were created by retro engineering various steel type and "living object pokemon," a man whose limbs were replaced with modified symbiotic Beldoms that assimilate more and more of his biomass as they evolve and fuse with each other, a girl who got the detective Pikachu treatment with a ghastly, and three people forcibly mutated into human/pokemon hybrids—one an Evee, one a Slugma, and one a Magikarp—can not possibly work as a group.
    ****it's hard to take down a megacorp when half the party likes the mods they were given.
    *****Can't just decide "screw society, I'm gonna live as a Pokemon out in the wilderness"
    ******Must not ignore that most people would think being part Pokemon is cool and that the PCs would probably be celebrities... and the Mgacorp's tech would make a fortune.
    *******Cannot go on a long rant about how a human/Magikarp hybrid, combined properly, would be the ultimate amphibious super soldier even ignoring the potential for a human to harness the power of Gyarados.
    ********Cannot ignore the "only four moves at a time rule."
    *********As always, PCs are expected to be wearing pants.
    .....I'd like a full transcript of that session, sounds like quite an experience And how do magikarp super soldiers work, killer splashes?

    Also, the overall concept sounds like it might still work, taking into account that being (part) pokémon is generally seen as awesome so long as you can still talk and stuff.

  16. - Top - End - #1126
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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing XII: A Thousand-Yard Stare is not Permiss

    *May not intentionally exploit the flaws taken in the first fight of the campaign.
    **May not accidentally exploit the flaws taken in the first fight of the campaign.

    *May not let the party become a literal circus.
    **May not make references to the Joshua Tree if they do.

    This is literally our RHoD campaign except the first one, lol.
    Cool elan (no not that kind) Illithid Slayer by linkele.

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  17. - Top - End - #1127
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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing XII: A Thousand-Yard Stare is not Permiss

    Quote Originally Posted by Taevyr View Post
    .....I'd like a full transcript of that session, sounds like quite an experience And how do magikarp super soldiers work, killer splashes?

    Also, the overall concept sounds like it might still work, taking into account that being (part) pokémon is generally seen as awesome so long as you can still talk and stuff.
    1: It's a hypothetical situation.

    2: Magikarp are probably the most successful species of pokemon, in a (Darwinian) evolutionary sense.

    They are found as native wild pokemon in every region except Orre(which has no native pokemon and very few wild pokemon) and in every or almost every body of water in that region. Salt water, fresh water, clean water, water that is polluted all to hell. Magikarp might be useless in a fight, but they're noted to be exceptionally hardy.

    They are noted to be able to use splash many times over the course of years to climb mountains(note: "splash" is "jump" in the original. That's why it's a normal type move) which implies that they can spend an extended period of time out of water. Between that and the pollution comment, it means that that it's likely that they need very little food, can eat almost anything, or both.

    And they're almost always the most common spawn in lakes, rivers, ponds, and such with it being noted in the Pokedex that they reproduce like crazy.

    And they don't have natural predators: There's a single mention of Magikarp ding when stranded on land and their corpses being scavenged but being as they are mostly scale and bone it's logical that most animals wouldn't bother unless they had a steel jaw and a lead stomach.

    While Magikarp gets a few decent TMs... It's more about adding that heartiness to a humanoid body type that can, you know, be taught how to swim instead of relying on underdeveloped swim muscles. Perfect for amphibious assaults: No need for breathing apparatuses and who would be guarding a lake or river that's too polluted for anything but a "useless" pokemon to live in? Most would see it as a natural defense
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    Spoiler: Ode To Meteors, By zimmerwald
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    Quote Originally Posted by zimmerwald1915 View Post
    Meteor
    You are a meteor
    Falling star
    You soar your
    Way down the air
    To the floor
    Where my other
    Rocks
    Are.

  18. - Top - End - #1128
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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing XII: A Thousand-Yard Stare is not Permiss

    Quote Originally Posted by Rater202 View Post
    1: It's a hypothetical situation.

    2: Magikarp are probably the most successful species of pokemon, in a (Darwinian) evolutionary sense.

    They are found as native wild pokemon in every region except Orre(which has no native pokemon and very few wild pokemon) and in every or almost every body of water in that region. Salt water, fresh water, clean water, water that is polluted all to hell. Magikarp might be useless in a fight, but they're noted to be exceptionally hardy.

    They are noted to be able to use splash many times over the course of years to climb mountains(note: "splash" is "jump" in the original. That's why it's a normal type move) which implies that they can spend an extended period of time out of water. Between that and the pollution comment, it means that that it's likely that they need very little food, can eat almost anything, or both.

    And they're almost always the most common spawn in lakes, rivers, ponds, and such with it being noted in the Pokedex that they reproduce like crazy.

    And they don't have natural predators: There's a single mention of Magikarp ding when stranded on land and their corpses being scavenged but being as they are mostly scale and bone it's logical that most animals wouldn't bother unless they had a steel jaw and a lead stomach.

    While Magikarp gets a few decent TMs... It's more about adding that heartiness to a humanoid body type that can, you know, be taught how to swim instead of relying on underdeveloped swim muscles. Perfect for amphibious assaults: No need for breathing apparatuses and who would be guarding a lake or river that's too polluted for anything but a "useless" pokemon to live in? Most would see it as a natural defense
    Also some occasionally evolve into a Gyarados presumably.
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  19. - Top - End - #1129
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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing XII: A Thousand-Yard Stare is not Permiss

    Quote Originally Posted by danielxcutter View Post
    Also some occasionally evolve into a Gyarados presumably.
    Considering that wild Gyarados are compared to natural disasters and are known to occasionally wipe small cities off the map, an engineered hybrid would be less "super soldiers" and more "living WMDs"
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    Spoiler: Ode To Meteors, By zimmerwald
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    Quote Originally Posted by zimmerwald1915 View Post
    Meteor
    You are a meteor
    Falling star
    You soar your
    Way down the air
    To the floor
    Where my other
    Rocks
    Are.

  20. - Top - End - #1130
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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing XII: A Thousand-Yard Stare is not Permiss

    Quote Originally Posted by Rater202 View Post
    Considering that wild Gyarados are compared to natural disasters and are known to occasionally wipe small cities off the map, an engineered hybrid would be less "super soldiers" and more "living WMDs"
    I mean militarily speaking, knowing that Gyarados is the result of magikarp evolving, there is no reason NOT to go around grabbing up all the magikarp you can because they are so plentiful and seemingly useless and just putting them through a harsh training regimen to turn as many of them into gyarados trained to fight for the military. The military's starting position when it comes to anyone outside of it is to assume they're useless for combat until they've been put through the boot camp ringer anyways, and as long as you figure out the method that works to make them willingly evolve into a gyarados soldier loyal to your cause, they can just repeatedly catch whatever random magikarp they find as recruitment. so really, any pokemon navy worth its salt has at least one gyarados boot camp somewhere for that kind of thing.
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  21. - Top - End - #1131
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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing XII: A Thousand-Yard Stare is not Permiss

    Quote Originally Posted by Lord Raziere View Post
    I mean militarily speaking, knowing that Gyarados is the result of magikarp evolving, there is no reason NOT to go around grabbing up all the magikarp you can because they are so plentiful and seemingly useless and just putting them through a harsh training regimen to turn as many of them into gyarados trained to fight for the military. The military's starting position when it comes to anyone outside of it is to assume they're useless for combat until they've been put through the boot camp ringer anyways, and as long as you figure out the method that works to make them willingly evolve into a gyarados soldier loyal to your cause, they can just repeatedly catch whatever random magikarp they find as recruitment. so really, any pokemon navy worth its salt has at least one gyarados boot camp somewhere for that kind of thing.
    Most nations frown on other nations developing weapons capable of destroying an entire city at once.

    Raising an army of Gyarados, a pokemon explicitly capable of just that, is just begging to get invaded by every other country on the planet.
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    Spoiler: Ode To Meteors, By zimmerwald
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    Quote Originally Posted by zimmerwald1915 View Post
    Meteor
    You are a meteor
    Falling star
    You soar your
    Way down the air
    To the floor
    Where my other
    Rocks
    Are.

  22. - Top - End - #1132
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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing XII: A Thousand-Yard Stare is not Permiss

    Quote Originally Posted by Rater202 View Post
    Most nations frown on other nations developing weapons capable of destroying an entire city at once.

    Raising an army of Gyarados, a pokemon explicitly capable of just that, is just begging to get invaded by every other country on the planet.
    Whoa, get too real-world discussion there Rater, we're gonna have to take this to another medium if we're going to continue it at all. just letting you know.
    My Fan Fiction:
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  23. - Top - End - #1133
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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing XII: A Thousand-Yard Stare is not Permiss

    Quote Originally Posted by Lord Raziere View Post
    Whoa, get too real-world discussion there Rater, we're gonna have to take this to another medium if we're going to continue it at all. just letting you know.
    I mean, we're doing it in the context of a hypothetical game...

    But yeah, too much. Sorry.

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    Spoiler: Ode To Meteors, By zimmerwald
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    Quote Originally Posted by zimmerwald1915 View Post
    Meteor
    You are a meteor
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    You soar your
    Way down the air
    To the floor
    Where my other
    Rocks
    Are.

  24. - Top - End - #1134
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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing XII: A Thousand-Yard Stare is not Permiss

    Quote Originally Posted by Rater202 View Post
    *Halflings are not the result of crossbreeding between gnomes and dwarves.
    Or the mutant offspring of goblins exposed to way too much magical radiation.
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  25. - Top - End - #1135
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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing XII: A Thousand-Yard Stare is not Permiss

    Quote Originally Posted by PhoenixPhyre View Post
    Or the mutant offspring of goblins exposed to way too much magical radiation.
    Halfling is not a corruption of "half-lin" referring to half goblins
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    Spoiler: Ode To Meteors, By zimmerwald
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    Quote Originally Posted by zimmerwald1915 View Post
    Meteor
    You are a meteor
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    You soar your
    Way down the air
    To the floor
    Where my other
    Rocks
    Are.

  26. - Top - End - #1136
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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing XII: A Thousand-Yard Stare is not Permiss

    Quote Originally Posted by Rater202 View Post
    Halfling is not a corruption of "half-lin" referring to half goblins
    Possibly irrelevant, but IIRC in Eberron the word "goblin" is a corruption of what they call themselves.
    Cool elan (no not that kind) Illithid Slayer by linkele.

    Editor/co-writer of Magicae Est Potestas, a crossover between Artemis Fowl and Undertale. Archive Of Our Own FanFiction.net DeviantArt
    We also have a TvTropes page!

    Currently playing: Red Hand of Doom(campaign journal)

    Extended signature here.

  27. - Top - End - #1137
    Colossus in the Playground
     
    Rater202's Avatar

    Join Date
    May 2013
    Location
    Where I am

    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing XII: A Thousand-Yard Stare is not Permiss

    *I may not play a deposed king from a foreign land hoping to raise funds to build an army and reclaim my throne unless the people who disposed of me are the bad guys in this narrative.
    **I cannot make constant jokes about my bloody reign and the various War Crimes I'm guilty of.
    ***Nor can I be dead serious about it.
    **** There is no conceivable ay that my alignment is Lawful Good.
    I also answer to Bookmark and Shadow Claw.

    Read my fanfiction here. Homebrew Material Here

    Awesome Avatar by Emperor Ing
    Spoiler: Ode To Meteors, By zimmerwald
    Show
    Quote Originally Posted by zimmerwald1915 View Post
    Meteor
    You are a meteor
    Falling star
    You soar your
    Way down the air
    To the floor
    Where my other
    Rocks
    Are.

  28. - Top - End - #1138
    Troll in the Playground
     
    BisectedBrioche's Avatar

    Join Date
    Feb 2007
    Location
    Some rainly old island
    Gender
    Female

    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing XII: A Thousand-Yard Stare is not Permiss

    * A 5 way split is very frustrating for the DM to keep track of, no matter how funny your antics are.
    Hi, I'm back, I guess. ^_^
    I stream LPs of single player games on Twitch! Mon, Wed & Fri; currently playing: Night in the Woods (Mon/Wed) and Ace Attorney (Fri)

  29. - Top - End - #1139
    Ettin in the Playground
     
    danielxcutter's Avatar

    Join Date
    Jul 2016
    Location
    Seoul
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing XII: A Thousand-Yard Stare is not Permiss

    Quote Originally Posted by BisectedBrioche View Post
    * A 5 way split is very frustrating for the DM to keep track of, no matter how funny your antics are.
    Is this hypothetical or did this actually happen?
    Cool elan (no not that kind) Illithid Slayer by linkele.

    Editor/co-writer of Magicae Est Potestas, a crossover between Artemis Fowl and Undertale. Archive Of Our Own FanFiction.net DeviantArt
    We also have a TvTropes page!

    Currently playing: Red Hand of Doom(campaign journal)

    Extended signature here.

  30. - Top - End - #1140
    Colossus in the Playground
     
    Rater202's Avatar

    Join Date
    May 2013
    Location
    Where I am

    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing XII: A Thousand-Yard Stare is not Permiss

    Quote Originally Posted by BisectedBrioche View Post
    * A 5 way split is very frustrating for the DM to keep track of, no matter how funny your antics are.
    The gm does not appreciate our attempts to literally split him into five versions of himself.
    I also answer to Bookmark and Shadow Claw.

    Read my fanfiction here. Homebrew Material Here

    Awesome Avatar by Emperor Ing
    Spoiler: Ode To Meteors, By zimmerwald
    Show
    Quote Originally Posted by zimmerwald1915 View Post
    Meteor
    You are a meteor
    Falling star
    You soar your
    Way down the air
    To the floor
    Where my other
    Rocks
    Are.

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