Things I May No Longer Do While Playing XII: A Thousand-Yard Stare is not Permission

[TeChameleon]

I can see how that could work.

It still feels like kind of a mix of all three though from what I’ve read: it disintegrates the material by oxidation (acid, though redox processes are distinct from acid base reactions), generates heat (fire), and creates a lot of hydrofluoric acid (acid and poison: that stuff is nasty...).

Maybe it could cause ongoing damage of each type? Or maybe I’m just overthinking this.

"Acid" is not the first thing that comes to mind when it produces reactions like this... (for those that don't read French, the things being exposed to CLF3, aka Chlorine Trifluoride, are in order, Plexiglass, Rubber Gloves, Clean Leather, Dirty Leather, (Gas) Mask, Wood, and Glove + Water). Always fun when the stuff you're working with makes your safety equipment explode.

... my epic-level wizard once transmuted Orcus' eyeballs into this stuff. He wasn't happy.

So, I suppose, on-topic:

* May no longer use knowledge of chemistry to horrifically traumatize deities.

[DeTess]

*When building an encounter for new players to Lancer I shouldn't design the opposing team based on things like 'synergy', 'tactics' or 'having a proper plan'.
**not even when it's totally in character for the relevant NPC's.
***especially since I designed those too.
****I should then not assume that the PC's will beat this team of NPC's in short order, just because they have nominally stronger and sturdier mechs.
*****I certainly shouldn't be surprised if the well-build synergistic team proceeds to punch well above their weight class and forms a genuine threat to the players, despite having less than half their total hp and only vaguely comparable damage output.

[BlueHamsterBean]

"Acid" is not the first thing that comes to mind when it produces reactions like this... (for those that don't read French, the things being exposed to CLF3, aka Chlorine Trifluoride, are in order, Plexiglass, Rubber Gloves, Clean Leather, Dirty Leather, (Gas) Mask, Wood, and Glove + Water). Always fun when the stuff you're working with makes your safety equipment explode.

... my epic-level wizard once transmuted Orcus' eyeballs into this stuff. He wasn't happy.

So, I suppose, on-topic:

* May no longer use knowledge of chemistry to horrifically traumatize deities.

That’s about as horrifying as I’d imagined: I’d only read about the chemical previously. Thanks for sharing this video!

My main question was whether “fire” damage is caused by oxidation or exposure to heat... though considering that a lot of fire damage is described as burns the answer seems obvious now (facepalm). (Also, now that I think about it, the examples of heat damage to a human body from short exposures that don’t involve oxidation seem... niche to say the least.)

Kinda bugs me that, RAW, really any creature with the proper damage immunity could shrug this off, but maybe that’s where magic comes in? Or maybe just say it ignores damage immunity and resistance.

I never thought I’d say this, but I pity Orcus. 0.0

**May not be annoyed when said deity uses their basic knowledge of physics, namely the bit about force, mass, and acceleration, to pancake me with their massive weapon.

[TeChameleon]

My old wizard has had a simmering hatred for Orcus since about the first or second level, although the epic level fight (which was basically a sendoff for our old characters we had run through two long campaigns) was when the serious shenanigans happened. Our lowbie characters from the campaign we had started recently had been captured, and, courtesy of plot and Orcus being kind of a petty ****, had ended up in a demiplane Orcus had created. The fight started as our old characters brought in the cavalry... as in, Bahamut, the Raven Queen, and I think Moradin..? while Orcus had Tiamat there, and a full-blown godwar erupted on the demiplane, complete with archons and fiends and whatnot happily murdering one another.

Anyways, my wizard decided that he was going to be the diversion. Cue nonsense, with some standouts being the aforementioned transmutation of Orcus' eyeballs into ClF3...

- Using a carefully-timed and -aimed shot to make one of Tiamat's heads try to eat the others (details are a bit fuzzy, it was years ago)

- Maze-ing Orcus (ironically, the simplest thing I did was what actually attracted comment, as I described it as my wizard 'waving his hand a bit, and then Orcus vanished with a *pop*')

- Discovering that this version of Orcus was once human, time-travelling to the past mid-battle (long story involving a sentient airship, time gods, a misfired Wish, and a lot of other silliness), polymorphing human not-yet-Orcus into a mouse (paused for breath, and the DM started to describe Orcus briefly transforming into a giant mouse ), then dumped mouse-past!Orcus into a warehouse full of cats, getting him resurrected every time he died, until he was basically catatonic with trauma...

Then returned him to human form, cursed him so that he would remember nothing of all this until I broke the curse, returned to the present exactly when I left, broke the curse... and opened a portal to the para-elemental plane of housecats

- and, as a finale, courtesy of semi-realistic physics and some long-range portals, slapped Orcus in the face with half a dozen relativistic kill vehicles. Thankfully, neither I nor the DM realized at the time that doing that, especially in an atmosphere, should have released enough hard radiation to turn everyone in the demiplane into greasy shadows on the mostly-melted walls

TL:DR-

* I may no longer use time travel and basic psychology to make Orcus scream like a little girl when exposed to housecats

** I may no longer abuse being allowed to have physics and thinking with portals to create relativistic rods-from-god (think 'tungsten telephone poles moving at a significant fraction of the speed of light')

[BlueHamsterBean]

TL:DR-

* I may no longer use time travel and basic psychology to make Orcus scream like a little girl when exposed to housecats

** I may no longer abuse being allowed to have physics and thinking with portals to create relativistic rods-from-god (think 'tungsten telephone poles moving at a significant fraction of the speed of light')

This was equal parts mad, awesome, and hilarious. Kinda reminds me of the Mr. Welch list chestnut about not giving the BBEG an irrational fear of the blue footed booby.

On another note:
*May not call my damage rolls from vicious mockery “rolling for yak-down.”
**May not propose a setting based on social combat between sentient yaks.
***May not make the prize from these competitions hairs from the opposing yaks’ undercoat.
****Puns, whole sometimes appreciated, are not to have settings built around them.

[Rater202]

*The boss would really like to know why I felt it was a good idea to steal the Idominous Rex, impregnate it with a Predalien Larva, and pump military-grade enhancement mutagens into it during the entirety of the gestation cycle.

[el minster]

Kill another player

[Anonymouswizard]

Kill another player

** If the end result is me, the person playing the game and not my character, going on trial, then I must wait until the other members of the group have left the house.

[TeChameleon]

*The boss would really like to know why I felt it was a good idea to steal the Idominous Rex, impregnate it with a Predalien Larva, and pump military-grade enhancement mutagens into it during the entirety of the gestation cycle.

If the answer is not "For SCIENCE!", there's a chance that you're doing it wrong.

[el minster]

** If the end result is me, the person playing the game and not my character, going on trial, then I must wait until the other members of the group have left the house.

***not even then

[Curelomosaurus]

Not allowed to use the Drunken Master PrC in an edgy, post-apocalyptic campaign setting.

No matter what the rules say, being drunk does not make me better at negotiating with insane wizards.

Not allowed to play a weresheep commoner.

Not allowed to play a gnome mob boss.

Robbing the dead king after failing to kill his assassins is not an appropriate ritual blessing, even if no one notices.

Not allowed to use Dancing Lights, ghost sound, and bluff to convince everyone that the ghost of the king wants the party rogue to be his heir.

May not put ranks in Handle Humanoid.

May not steal the clothes off of dead party members, even if I really hated them.

Aboleth mucus and a level in beguiler are not an adequate replacement for the wizard.

Taking every speck of dust from every dungeon room is not a productive use of time.

If I have to ask DM permission, the answer is no.

[Rockphed]

Not allowed to use Dancing Lights, ghost sound, and bluff to convince everyone that the ghost of the king wants the party rogue to be his heir.

* If I try anyway, I should clue the rogue in before I start.
** When the rogue messes things up, I should not try to change the heir to the barbarian with 3 charisma.
*** The ranger's cat animal companion is right out.
**** So is the wizards familiar.

[Anonymouswizard]

* Going back to the 1940s does not generate Moon Maidens, Mars Amazons, or in fact any other form of celestial body-based attractive women.

[Man on Fire]

This was equal parts mad, awesome, and hilarious. Kinda reminds me of the Mr. Welch list chestnut about not giving the BBEG an irrational fear of the blue footed booby.

It also works since Welch's favorite setting is Mystara, where Orcus was once a mortal.

* Not allowed to get more offended someone tries to buy me for a bunch of cheap weapons than about the fact someone tries to buy me.

[BlueHamsterBean]

It also works since Welch's favorite setting is Mystara, where Orcus was once a mortal.

* Not allowed to get more offended someone tries to buy me for a bunch of cheap weapons than about the fact someone tries to buy me.

Interesting: where did you read this? I ask because I’m always happy to find new resources on that wonderful loonie.

**May not insist that I am at least worth two holy avengers and a vorpal sword.
***May not be surprised when the would be buyer changes their deal to suit my complaints.
****May not devise a plan to turn myself over for said weapons and then escape with little difficulty.
*****Especially if the party is level 3.

[TeChameleon]

* Going back to the 1940s does not generate Moon Maidens, Mars Amazons, or in fact any other form of celestial body-based attractive women.

Is it possible that you went back to the wrong 1940s? Some kind of warped parallel universe or something?

* I may no longer complain when my fighter's obnoxiously high AC forces the DM to find alternative means to damage him, and ends up with him being set on fire three different ways in the space of a couple of turns

[Rockphed]

Is it possible that you went back to the wrong 1940s? Some kind of warped parallel universe or something?

* I may no longer complain when my fighter's obnoxiously high AC forces the DM to find alternative means to damage him, and ends up with him being set on fire three different ways in the space of a couple of turns

He set my arm on fire!

In a serious game I should play a serious character.
*taking every mental problem as flaws it not a serious character.
**I do not get separate point pools for each of my 5 personalities.
***Enjoying cigars is not a character flaw worth enough points to max out my intelligence.
****Fear of flying, however, might be enough to get an extra point of strength and brawl.

[JAL_1138]

... and opened a portal to the para-elemental plane of housecats

So that’s why that interplanar portal opened up in my living room. I’d been wondering about that.

[Telok]

He set my arm on fire!
***Enjoying cigars is not a character flaw worth enough points to max out my intelligence.

Bah, totally legit in Champions.

*I may not abuse the 'unable to be surprised' clause, a silly high initative score, narrative causality, basic tactics, the Contengency spell, and the Meteor Storm spell.
**At least one ambusher must be allowed to survive long enough to take at least one action that would break stealth before they all die horrible flamey deaths.
***Not allowed to do it in D&D either.

[danielxcutter]

Bah, totally legit in Champions.

*I may not abuse the 'unable to be surprised' clause, a silly high initative score, narrative causality, basic tactics, the Contengency spell, and the Meteor Storm spell.
**At least one ambusher must be allowed to survive long enough to take at least one action that would break stealth before they all die horrible flamey deaths.
***Not allowed to do it in D&D either.

How good is Meteor Swarm in Champions then? Or 5e? It’s not really a good spell in 3.5e, at least.

[Telok]

How good is Meteor Swarm in Champions then? Or 5e? It’s not really a good spell in 3.5e, at least.

Depends on how many character points you put into it. D&D 5e, kinda level appropriate with other spells so not abysmal damage and good range. In D&D 1e or DtD40k7e it's hot flamey death. With D&D 1e meteor storm you can get 40d4 no save damage along a 220' line while mages have max 11d4+27 hit points. In DtD40k7e I've used it to take out 300' of wooden palisade, and all the NPC elite troops behind it became casualties.

[danielxcutter]

Depends on how many character points you put into it. D&D 5e, kinda level appropriate with other spells so not abysmal damage and good range. In D&D 1e or DtD40k7e it's hot flamey death. With D&D 1e meteor storm you can get 40d4 no save damage along a 220' line while mages have max 11d4+27 hit points. In DtD40k7e I've used it to take out 300' of wooden palisade, and all the NPC elite troops behind it became casualties.

Yeah, in 3.Xe it blasting sucks largely because damage dice are the same as earlier editions but hit points went up a lot, and for Meteor Swarm in particular fire resistance cuts the damage output a lot. And practically everyone and their mother has fire resistance at that point.

[Rater202]

*I should not be forthright in my intention to commit seppuku if I can't get my periodic bouts of homicidal rage and violent insanity under control.

[Man on Fire]

* Not allowed to punch a guy so hard he crashed through the wall, the wall on the other side of the room and the window all across the hallway.

[vasilidor]

not allowed to make a troll in sixth edition shadowrun who punches harder than a panther cannon at game start.

[danielxcutter]

* Not allowed to punch a guy so hard he crashed through the wall, the wall on the other side of the room and the window all across the hallway.

I would love to do that if I knew how to. Is this a specific system?

[Man on Fire]

I would love to do that if I knew how to. Is this a specific system?

Confession time, I was the DM. Two PCs got ambushed and when other two arrived they had entire house to get around to save them...and the Half-Orc Paladin rolled a nat 20 on hitting an enemy with a hammer so I've said "You know what? Roll me Athletics. You roll 10 or more, you punch him through the wall. For each 5 points above 10 you can punch him through one wall." She got 20-something.

From the same adventure and even the same player:

* If I ask a Half-Orc, even a Paladin, how do they want to finish off the BBEG, I cannot complain if I get a visceral description of said Half-Orc tearing BBEG into small pieces, terrifying rest of the party and making friendly, Gandalf-esque NPC get a heart attack from sheer terror of withnessing it.

Also, from the same game, different player:
* No longer allowed to insult a Wight so bad it calmly decides coming back to life was a msitake and dies again.

[danielxcutter]

Confession time, I was the DM. Two PCs got ambushed and when other two arrived they had entire house to get around to save them...and the Half-Orc Paladin rolled a nat 20 on hitting an enemy with a hammer so I've said "You know what? Roll me Athletics. You roll 10 or more, you punch him through the wall. For each 5 points above 10 you can punch him through one wall." She got 20-something.

From the same adventure and even the same player:

* If I ask a Half-Orc, even a Paladin, how do they want to finish off the BBEG, I cannot complain if I get a visceral description of said Half-Orc tearing BBEG into small pieces, terrifying rest of the party and making friendly, Gandalf-esque NPC get a heart attack from sheer terror of withnessing it.

Also, from the same game, different player:
* No longer allowed to insult a Wight so bad it calmly decides coming back to life was a msitake and dies again.

...Did the guy deserve it?

[Man on Fire]

...Did the guy deserve it?

The cultist, the BBEG or the Wight?

[danielxcutter]

The cultist, the BBEG or the Wight?

I meant the second but might as well ask for all three.