Cheesiest. Magic Uses. Ever.

[OOTS_Rules.]

This is where we post our cheesiest uses for magic ever.

1: Uses Transmute Stone to Flesh to turn an Earth Elemental or Stone Golem into a giant meatball. Dinner time!

2: (A way to beat That Pseudonatural Paragon Damn Crab!) Have the party Fighter go onto a cliff and throw a couple of pebbles. Step 2: Have Polymorph Any Object readied for when the fighter throws the Pebble Cluster, turning it into a cluster of Gargantuan-sized boulders. 3: Cast Time Stop and run away. One Word: SPLAT!

3: Have your high-level party come prepared with nothing but cheap items, like chains or wooden mallets. Then, polymorph any object them into powerful items like a Flaming Spiked Hammer or a Poisonous Spiked Chain.

4: Not magic, but a magic item. An Oversized Spiked Chain of Enlarge Person is the best thing ever invented. That way, it enlarges you making the weapon fit better and fulfilling that combo somebody made.

[Kurald Galain]

Well, you know, the usual.

Divine Metacheese.
Initiate of the Sevenfold Gouda.
Shapeshift.

[Tengu]

This is where we post our cheesiest uses for magic ever.

1: Uses Transmute Stone to Flesh to turn an Earth Elemental or Stone Golem into a giant meatball. Dinner time!

2: (A way to beat That Pseudonatural Paragon Damn Crab!) Have the party Fighter go onto a cliff and throw a couple of pebbles. Step 2: Have Polymorph Any Object readied for when the fighter throws the Pebble Cluster, turning it into a cluster of Gargantuan-sized boulders. 3: Cast Time Stop and run away. One Word: SPLAT!

3: Have your high-level party come prepared with nothing but cheap items, like chains or wooden mallets. Then, polymorph any object them into powerful items like a Flaming Spiked Hammer or a Poisonous Spiked Chain.

4: Not magic, but a magic item. An Oversized Spiked Chain of Enlarge Person is the best thing ever invented. That way, it enlarges you making the weapon fit better and fulfilling that combo somebody made.

1. It's Stone to Flesh, not Stone to Delicious And Boiled Mincemeat. Most enemies you face are made from flesh, but eating them is usually not a viable combat tactic.

2. Works.

3. You cannot use this spell to create magical items.

4. You know that when you get enlarged, your equipment also grows with you, right?

[OOTS_Rules.]

1: Well, once it becomes a quivering heap of flesh, you can easilly cook it
.
2: Thanks

3: Oops

4: Then ignore the Oversized part.

[Tengu]

But won't such a golem/elemental still be moving? Imagine fighting a huge, bloody, roughly humanoid steak.

It'd probably lose all the DR though.

[kamikasei]

1: Uses Transmute Stone to Flesh to turn an Earth Elemental or Stone Golem into a giant meatball. Dinner time!

Man what.

I thought, "this clearly can't work. Golems will be immune or something." So I looked it up. Stone to flesh. "For example, this spell would turn a stone golem into a flesh golem..." That knocks four off the CR! That's insane!

So then I look up stone golems and see:

A stone golem is immune to any spell or spell-like ability that allows spell resistance. In addition, certain spells and effects function differently against the creature, as noted below.

...A stone to flesh spell does not actually change the golem’s structure but negates its damage reduction and immunity to magic for 1 full round.

So, yeah. That doesn't actually work, but obviously whoever was writing the stats for stone golems didn't tell the person writing the spell.

[OOTS_Rules.]

It would be a quivering mass of flesh. I think it would be pretty easy to kill.

[ufo]

It would be a quivering mass of flesh. I think it would be pretty easy to kill.

It'd be fecking disgusting! I can't imagine fighting a huge pulp of raw flesh. Eww.

[Spiryt]

A transmute rock to mud spell slows a stone golem (as the slow spell) for 2d6 rounds

And about earth elemental:

Magical stone is not affected by the spell. The depth of the mud created cannot exceed 10 feet.

So Earth elementals probably can't be affected.

[OOTS_Rules.]

Thats stone to MUD. We are turning stone into FLESH.

Number 5: Cast Transmute Stone to Flesh on Earth.

[Miraqariftsky]

This is where we post our cheesiest uses for magic ever.

1: Uses Transmute Stone to Flesh to turn an Earth Elemental or Stone Golem into a giant meatball. Dinner time!

Hoy-ba! Ye forgot the fireball to cook the thing--- ye do't want it raw-rare, do ye?

It'd be fecking disgusting! I can't imagine fighting a huge pulp of raw flesh. Eww.

My very first GM did this... except that the flesh was not just muscle but a certainskinless organ with many veins... YUGH! I was traumatized!

[OOTS_Rules.]

XD

So true. Spells once used for slaying also work for BBQs.

[Citizen Joe]

Back in 2nd edition, a male form of medusa was made that had stone to flesh ability. When the medusa turned someone to stone, they'd break off parts, use stone to flesh, and have dinner.

[OOTS_Rules.]

So Medusa and her mate used to be a BBQ team? Quick, someboyd post that in the House of Horrors!

[Quietus]

Am I the only person whose first thought was "Major creation : Gouda"?

[OOTS_Rules.]

I dunno.

Cheesy Magic 6: Cone of Cold to freeze a moat and walk across, ending a deadly underwater encounter with crocodiles.


Cheesy Magic 7: Polymorph Any Object CAN be permanent if the objects are similar. First, craft a Tarresque mannequin. Then, increase the size by one until it is the size of the Tarresque. Finally, PAO it into a Tarresque. Congrats, you have a permenant pet Tarresque.

Cheesy Magic 8: Do the same, but for Pun-Pun.

[Starsinger]

Cheesy Magic 8: Do the same, but for Pun-Pun.

Pretty sure the polymorph subschool doesn't allow you to polymorph into specific creatures.

[OOTS_Rules.]

No, you take a kobold mannequin and PaO it into a kobold. Then watch as it levels up and gains class levels. Result: Pun-Pun.

[Spiryt]

No, you take a kobold mannequin and PaO it into a kobold. Then watch as it levels up and gains class levels. Result: Pun-Pun.

OK, but why this Tarrasque or Pun Pun should be your pet? Listen to you?

Spell definition tells that you will just create Tarasque. You will probably had to fight with him in the very next round.

[OOTS_Rules.]

Mind control spells.

[Kurald Galain]

Mind control spells.

Pun-pun is immune to those, and the Tarrasque has a pretty good saving throw.

[OOTS_Rules.]

You pay Pun-Pun and feed the Tarrasque?

[Wabbajack]

Cheesy Magic 9: Get an medium/large archer and a large/huge quiver, if possible with infinite arrows. Then cast Enlarge person on the archer, make it permanent with permanency, give him the quiver and cast reduce person on the archer and make it permanent with permanency. Whenever he fires an arrow it becomes large/huge in the air :D

[Drider]

You pay Pun-Pun and feed the Tarrasque?

Pun-Pun can TAKE ALL your money, the tarrasque will eat you AND your food.

[Spiryt]

You pay Pun-Pun and feed the Tarrasque?

Well, both Pun Pun and Tarrasque can achieve much more cash/food on their own.

[Xyk]

Seriously, I'm gonna agree with everyone against the tarrasque pet. they are pretty much the most dangerous thing ever and won't be mind-controlled so easily. However if you get a baby tarrasque through the same method and watch it grow maybe it will be your pet. After about a thousand years of growing up.

[purplearcanist]

No, here's how to do it:
1. Take a weak monster, such as a human baby, or PAO something into a weak monster.
2. Use Dominate Monster on it.
3. PAO it into whatever monster you want, but with a slightly different feature (like one different scale). Order your pet to fail the saving throw.
4. Finally, use PAO any object to turn it into the monster you want. And make sure to order your pet to fail his saving throw and lower his SR (if he has any).

Now, you have a pet of any monster you want. Have fun with a great wyrm prismatic dragon pet.

Just curious if there is a rule that prevents you from doing this.

Alternatively, you can do this on yourself, skipping steps 1 and 2.

[Dullyanna]

Pun-Pun can TAKE ALL your money, the tarrasque will eat you AND your food.

Actually, I think Pun Pun can turn YOU into money... or a pulpy, edible mound of flesh... or a pet tarrasque.

[Tor the Fallen]

Seriously, I'm gonna agree with everyone against the tarrasque pet. they are pretty much the most dangerous thing ever and won't be mind-controlled so easily. However if you get a baby tarrasque through the same method and watch it grow maybe it will be your pet. After about a thousand years of growing up.

The Tarrasque can be reliably dominated by a level 12 psion.

[AKA_Bait]

Cheesy Magic 9: Get an medium/large archer and a large/huge quiver, if possible with infinite arrows. Then cast Enlarge person on the archer, make it permanent with permanency, give him the quiver and cast reduce person on the archer and make it permanent with permanency. Whenever he fires an arrow it becomes large/huge in the air :D

This doesn't work.

Enlarge person counters and dispels reduce person.

That's just an interesting way to waste 4 spells and 1,000 exp.