Results 661 to 690 of 1025
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2021-11-13, 03:12 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Aug 2010
- Location
- The Primus Imperium
- Gender
Re: Campaign Quotes, No Context Edition VII: (Edited for less context)
Ledaal Zealot wife: "Every three anathema [that you kill] you get a 'adventure' pass where I'll agree to do one thing you suggest. Threesome being an example"
Player (OOC): "The anathema shall quake in fear, knowing that [Fire Aspect Playboy's] lust is coming for them!!"
LZW (OOC): "Ha. "SHE SAID SHE'D WEAR THE MAID OUTFIT IF I TOOK YOU *******S DOWN"!"
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"[we're dynasts,] we have servants for this!! Give her to the nurse before you do some real damage!"
"... But I always wanted to hold my kids... be there for them, ya know?"
"And that's very sweet but you're holding her upside down!"
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Cynis player: "Yes, it was fun even if the relationship had little drama."
Peleps player: "Surpisingly, sometimes two characters are banging because they like each other."
C: "The horror."Hate me if you want. But that's your issue to fix, not mine.
Primal ego vos, estis ex nihilo.
When Gods Go To War comes out March 8th
Discord: HalfTangible
Extended Sig
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2021-11-13, 11:43 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Dec 2012
- Gender
Re: Campaign Quotes, No Context Edition VII: (Edited for less context)
DM: "As Saber unleashes his Noble Phantasm, you find that there is no point in space inside the circus tent that is not presently also a sword"
DM: "Your train plows threw the no-longer-too-narrow ally behind the farmer's market, through the portal, and the front end smacks the Kraken head on."
DM: "As you stab Helen of Troy with the the Spear of Longinus, something strange happens..."
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2021-11-21, 01:01 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- May 2008
- Location
- Orlando, FL
- Gender
Re: Campaign Quotes, No Context Edition VII: (Edited for less context)
Beau: "I am looking for... what am I looking for?"
Sparks: "A way out?"
Beau: "I have to get out of here first."
GM: "Well that'll make an English professor throw themselves off a roof."
GM: "Roll Performance."
Sally: (*rolls a 1*) "Baby Shark, doot do doot doot."
Sally: "So how is it?"
Sparks: "Like a salad stuffed into a water balloon."
Beau: "My problem is dealing with the Impetus from a sudden stop."
Sylvie: "There's a pill for that."
GM: "You have two nights covered at the INN, courtesy of the King's Hand."
Sparks: "Where's the rest of the king?"
Beau: "Stupid question."
The King's Hand: "No such thing."
Beau: "How many licks did it take you to get to the center of that Tootsie pop?"
The King's Hand: "One such thing."
Lily: "I was a half-elf, yes, but I was resurrected as a full elf."
Beau: "He needed all the elf she could get."
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2021-11-23, 07:36 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Feb 2016
Re: Campaign Quotes, No Context Edition VII: (Edited for less context)
"Tasha, you maleficent bitch, I've read your book! Now, shut up!" (cast's silence)
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2021-12-08, 05:13 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Jan 2010
- Gender
Re: Campaign Quotes, No Context Edition VII: (Edited for less context)
"With your skills and luck, you note that the scrolls and potions are labelled."
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2021-12-08, 06:40 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Aug 2014
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2021-12-09, 04:22 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- May 2015
- Location
- Texas
- Gender
Re: Campaign Quotes, No Context Edition VII: (Edited for less context)
From a few weeks back ... speaking of necklace of fireballs ...
* P1 "Before you toss that bead from the necklace, know that my scorched backside will skewer you as soon as this battle is over"
** P2 "And I'll hold you down while he hits you"Last edited by KorvinStarmast; 2021-12-09 at 04:22 PM.
Avatar by linklele. How Teleport Worksa. Malifice (paraphrased):
Rulings are not 'House Rules.' Rulings are a DM doing what DMs are supposed to do.
b. greenstone (paraphrased):
Agency means that they {players} control their character's actions; you control the world's reactions to the character's actions.
Second known member of the Greyview Appreciation Society
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2021-12-09, 11:10 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Apr 2014
- Location
- Left Side of Your Face
- Gender
Re: Campaign Quotes, No Context Edition VII: (Edited for less context)
From a Dragon Ball campaign I'm in:
Harp: "Why would any boy have a crush on me? People have crushes on people they think are cute. I'm a weird hairless demon monster with antennae and exposed muscles. I'm basically a pair of horns away from being an amalgamation of human nightmares."
Idna: "You still haven't found the Internet, huh?"
Harp: "Okay, Mun Yun, you watch the kids, make sure they stay safe. Idna, you watch Mun Yun, make sure he stays safe."
Mun Yun: "Alri- hey wait a minute!"
Harp: "Do your best at carpentry, Mun Yun! When I'm rich and famous, you can build my retirement mansion!"
Harp: "Boys can like boys!? This explains everything! You two must like each other! That's why you act so weird and passive-aggressive when we all hang out - I'm getting in the way of you two spending time together! I'm so sorry!"
Ulu and Eriac, both with very obvious crushes on Harp: bewildered sputtering
Idna: "I thought you were the observant one."
Harp: "Will you be my daddy?"
Master Lo Rao: horrified "Where did you get such ideas!?"
Harp: devastated "I understand... I can't imagine you'd want to adopt me after what my Mom did..." leaves
Lo Rao: "Adopt? Oh, crap. Harp, wait!"
Harp: "Can you tell me more stories, Papa?"
Lo Rao: "Honestly most of them have the same structure. Somebody does something dumb, and everyone dies at the end."
Harp: "Except you!"
Lo Rao: "... Yeah."
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2021-12-10, 05:46 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Dec 2008
- Location
- Toowoomba, Australia
- Gender
Re: Campaign Quotes, No Context Edition VII: (Edited for less context)
It's rare I have something to contribute, purely due to my inability to find a campaign, but here's one from a now-dead Exalted campaign.
Princess Cao Lai: "I've as much desire to get the Mask of Winters involved in this as I do slathering myself in sauce and presenting myself to the nearest hungry Tyrant Lizard."Avatar of Gnar'tigor - former Star Player of the Hellborn Hooligans Blood Bowl team - by Savannah
Brilliant D&D song from Aussie comedy band Tripod.
If anyone can find a better-quality version of that, let me know.
The Hellborn Hooligans Reborn
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2021-12-10, 09:24 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- May 2015
- Location
- Texas
- Gender
Re: Campaign Quotes, No Context Edition VII: (Edited for less context)
Avatar by linklele. How Teleport Worksa. Malifice (paraphrased):
Rulings are not 'House Rules.' Rulings are a DM doing what DMs are supposed to do.
b. greenstone (paraphrased):
Agency means that they {players} control their character's actions; you control the world's reactions to the character's actions.
Second known member of the Greyview Appreciation Society
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2021-12-10, 09:57 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Dec 2008
- Location
- Toowoomba, Australia
- Gender
Re: Campaign Quotes, No Context Edition VII: (Edited for less context)
I mean it would've been the setup for a perfect callback if, later in the campaign, her Lunar Mate had turned out to be one with a Tyrant Lizard for their spirit shape. Or the Storyteller threw a regular Tyrant Lizard at us.
Spoiler: For those who don't know what Exalted's Tyrant Lizards are:Think an especially-large T-Rex and you're most of the way there.Avatar of Gnar'tigor - former Star Player of the Hellborn Hooligans Blood Bowl team - by Savannah
Brilliant D&D song from Aussie comedy band Tripod.
If anyone can find a better-quality version of that, let me know.
The Hellborn Hooligans Reborn
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2021-12-13, 02:21 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Jan 2021
Re: Campaign Quotes, No Context Edition VII: (Edited for less context)
"Ooh, check this out. I'm gonna give up my ability to see walls."
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2021-12-13, 03:01 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Aug 2014
Re: Campaign Quotes, No Context Edition VII: (Edited for less context)
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2021-12-14, 04:45 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Jan 2021
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2021-12-22, 07:57 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Dec 2014
Re: Campaign Quotes, No Context Edition VII: (Edited for less context)
"Tell us about your innards!"
"For now, the babies will live."
Motto of the Anti-Post Office: "Rain or Shine, we will stop them."
"Hi, I'm... Clive."
"Insight, 17!"
"He's not Clive."
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2021-12-30, 07:56 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Feb 2014
Re: Campaign Quotes, No Context Edition VII: (Edited for less context)
Rogue: -trying to stab between Bard's legs- Nat 1!
Bard: Ya gonna eat a coin for that roll?
Rogue: I don't have any left! You should've resisted me!
"The way I run prestidigitation is that the caster can roll to target where the dirt goes."
"Put it back in him!"
"You guys are gambling with the fabric reality. Over pie."
"Oh my god, it's a Rogue that Rogues!"
"Depends on where the cream is coming from and how hard you're whipping it."
"You ate her pie. That's on you."
"That's what I'm gonna do. I don't have any weapons so I'm gonna eat the pies."
DM: You get an ominous feeling that someone, somewhere, hates you.
Rogue: No, that's everyone.
"No! I'm eating them in your body!"
DM: Just before your souls switch bodies, you vomit up all the pie. It kinda coalesces, almost like it's sentient, and jist dives into a sewer grate.
Necromancer: *head in hands* Not this again...
"I paid people to fight pies."Last edited by Diachronos; 2021-12-30 at 10:00 PM.
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2022-01-09, 04:22 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Feb 2007
- Location
- England
- Gender
Re: Campaign Quotes, No Context Edition VII: (Edited for less context)
Have some quotes, with the absolute minimum of context
DM: "Well, that guy looks like he has had significantly better days."
Druid: "He probably has, I mean how good a day would you be having if a leopard bounced up onto a balcony, growled and then four stars slapped you in the face?!"
"No it can roar, it doesn't have muscles either but it can still move, if whatever magic is animating it can allow it to move it can allow it to roar too. It's already got tiny ass arms, don't take away it's roar too!"
"It's not quite as rudely interrupted as smashing into a Space Hulk."
"It's like condom theory, but with added angry badger"
Imperial Guard officer: "The Lord Commander was shot at from an elevated position."
Owain: "Yilani, was it you?"
Yilani "Don't be stupid, I don't miss"
*confused Imperial Guard officer*
"It's got a hole, it's got tentacles, what more could a dwarf ask for?" "The dwarf is still on his leash, right?"
"I am indeed going back to fisting this Great Unclean One"
"WE ARE NOT playing volleyball with a Nemesis Dreadknight"
"Not with that attitude we're not!"
"I slap him, I fix him up whilst muttering that Sanguinius would be ashamed of this, then I slap him again"
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2022-01-09, 07:18 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Mar 2021
- Gender
Re: Campaign Quotes, No Context Edition VII: (Edited for less context)
"Badgers are people!"
"Never tell me the odds!"
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2022-01-14, 01:19 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Aug 2014
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2022-01-15, 10:28 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- May 2008
- Location
- Orlando, FL
- Gender
Re: Campaign Quotes, No Context Edition VII: (Edited for less context)
Sparks: "Did the pirate ship really need ground effects?"
GM: "The ballista has been mounted to the front of the ship."
Beau: "It's a prow moment."
Sparks: "That's why it's not called a 'Susan Screw-it I'll Find It Later Sachel'."
LGM: "The couatl has chosen!"
Sparks: "Oh, it's New Bond Plus. Gold Bond."
Lily: "It isn't foot powder."
GM: "He looks like a Klingon who was told to hold fire."
Lily: "The dragon! She's gone from suck to blow!"
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2022-01-15, 11:21 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Feb 2014
Re: Campaign Quotes, No Context Edition VII: (Edited for less context)
"Without the pies, we had no way to save you from the pie."
"Why does the pie have darkvision?!"
"If I eat Tim, does that give me a pie roll?"
"God dammit Frank, you ate the pie, didn't you?"
"Can the pie eat pie?"
"Yes, you can pi square it."
"I only have one more HP than the pies?!"
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2022-01-16, 12:40 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Mar 2005
- Location
- 61.2° N, 149.9° W
- Gender
Re: Campaign Quotes, No Context Edition VII: (Edited for less context)
"If we reincarnate him as a badger he'll be a better fighter and less of a liability in social stuff."
"We'll have the wildmage read the scroll. He's got the rerolls and force max result things for random effects."
"Lets end the session here. I have to dig through the monster books to find something suitably weird to reincarnate him as."
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2022-01-16, 01:00 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- May 2016
- Location
- Corvallis, OR
- Gender
Re: Campaign Quotes, No Context Edition VII: (Edited for less context)
Paraphrased lightly:
(Paladin): I run in, taunt the boingies so they'll chase me, and then run out.
Proteans (mutation based character): make sure you stand aside so I don't spit acid all over you.
All: make sure to shoot the chest first
Proteans, OOC: there's a lot of fun in getting hurt sometimes.Dawn of Hope: a 5e setting. http://wiki.admiralbenbo.org
Rogue Equivalent Damage calculator, now prettier and more configurable!
5e Monster Data Sheet--vital statistics for all 693 MM, Volo's, and now MToF monsters: Updated!
NIH system 5e fork, very much WIP. Base github repo.
NIH System PDF Up to date main-branch build version.
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2022-01-24, 11:00 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- May 2015
- Location
- Texas
- Gender
Re: Campaign Quotes, No Context Edition VII: (Edited for less context)
*I feel like Vampires are not good for our health*
Spoiler: how did this come up in conversation?
Yes, we are playing in Curse of Strahd, and the sorcerer said thatAvatar by linklele. How Teleport Worksa. Malifice (paraphrased):
Rulings are not 'House Rules.' Rulings are a DM doing what DMs are supposed to do.
b. greenstone (paraphrased):
Agency means that they {players} control their character's actions; you control the world's reactions to the character's actions.
Second known member of the Greyview Appreciation Society
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2022-01-25, 04:03 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Jan 2012
- Gender
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2022-01-25, 11:44 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Aug 2010
- Location
- The Primus Imperium
- Gender
Re: Campaign Quotes, No Context Edition VII: (Edited for less context)
Hate me if you want. But that's your issue to fix, not mine.
Primal ego vos, estis ex nihilo.
When Gods Go To War comes out March 8th
Discord: HalfTangible
Extended Sig
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2022-01-25, 11:51 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- May 2015
- Location
- Texas
- Gender
Re: Campaign Quotes, No Context Edition VII: (Edited for less context)
Avatar by linklele. How Teleport Worksa. Malifice (paraphrased):
Rulings are not 'House Rules.' Rulings are a DM doing what DMs are supposed to do.
b. greenstone (paraphrased):
Agency means that they {players} control their character's actions; you control the world's reactions to the character's actions.
Second known member of the Greyview Appreciation Society
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2022-01-29, 11:24 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- May 2008
- Location
- Orlando, FL
- Gender
Re: Campaign Quotes, No Context Edition VII: (Edited for less context)
GM: "A lightning bolt comes down on-"
Lily: "Let me guess; me again?"
GM: "No, it hits Crit this time."
Lily: "Why Crit?"
GM: "He's a big hobgob with a two-handed choppy-chop."
Lily: "So why was I hit last round?"
Sparks: "You were the big threat last round. This round it's Crit. You've been demoted to second place."
Lily: "Should I feel insulted?"
Sparks: "Better than feeling shocked."
Beau: "Yeah, current events are in your favor."
GM: *groan*
Beau: "What do you mean you want me to hang off the side of the ship, holding everyone's pants to the sea?"
Sparks: "Just let me cast Prestidigitation. It's OSHA compliant."
Sparks: "Congrats, you just chummed the waters."
Beau: "I had thought those sharks were getting buddy-buddy with us."
GM: *groans*
Lily: "Sylvie is a cleric."
Sparks: "Half cleric. She multi-classes."
Beau: "So Cleric light? Half the calories of most religions?"
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2022-01-30, 01:19 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- May 2016
- Location
- Corvallis, OR
- Gender
Re: Campaign Quotes, No Context Edition VII: (Edited for less context)
Dawn of Hope: a 5e setting. http://wiki.admiralbenbo.org
Rogue Equivalent Damage calculator, now prettier and more configurable!
5e Monster Data Sheet--vital statistics for all 693 MM, Volo's, and now MToF monsters: Updated!
NIH system 5e fork, very much WIP. Base github repo.
NIH System PDF Up to date main-branch build version.
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2022-01-30, 10:08 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Aug 2010
- Location
- The Primus Imperium
- Gender
Re: Campaign Quotes, No Context Edition VII: (Edited for less context)
P1: "There was a time in Risa's life where she figured whatever man she got with (assuming she did at all) would be taller than her. Then she hit 6' and kept going [another 7 inches]."
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P1 (Risa's player): "... i blame you guys for the fact I have a better idea of Risa's thoughts on romance than her military career"
GM: "good"
--
"You... want me to set myself on fire?"
"Metaphorically, of course."
"........... I have no idea what that expression could possibly mean."
"He wants to hook up your power coupling."
"... I don't have a lot of electrical devices to plug in?"
"Force preserve me... he'd go spelunking in your sarlacc pit?"
"What kind of psychotic moron owns a sarlacc pit?"
"Do battle with the fearsome krayt dragon within your cave of wonders!!"
"Owning a krayt dragon is only slightly less stupid than owning a sarlacc."
"*sigh* Hang on, I need to come up with some other metaphors..."
"... you know he meant sex, right?"
"It pains me you feel the need to ask."
--
Risa: torn between letting Myr know she's joking because she's his friend and doesn't want him to embarass himself... or letting him awkwardly try to explain [sex] because she's his friend and wants to see him embarass himselfLast edited by HalfTangible; 2022-01-30 at 10:11 AM.
Hate me if you want. But that's your issue to fix, not mine.
Primal ego vos, estis ex nihilo.
When Gods Go To War comes out March 8th
Discord: HalfTangible
Extended Sig