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Thread: Vending Machine

  1. - Top - End - #391
    Ogre in the Playground
     
    Odentin's Avatar

    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    Location
    Austin, TX
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: Vending Machine

    You receive a glob of Flubber.

    I insert a vial of Compound V.
    -Odentin

    Quote Originally Posted by Skype
    Odentin: Wait. Weren't we going to stop off in the capital and murder the emperor?
    Bladecutter: We might as well, it's on the way.
    GM: "We might was well" has never been used in that way!
    Bladecutter: Well, we really don't like him...

  2. - Top - End - #392
    Halfling in the Playground
     
    Imp

    Join Date
    Oct 2020
    Location
    In my head

    Default Re: Vending Machine

    You get a beaker of Chemical X

    I insert sugar, spice, and everything nice

  3. - Top - End - #393
    Ogre in the Playground
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Location
    London, UK

    Default Re: Vending Machine

    You get slugs, snails and puppy dogs' tails.

    I insert an irate dog owner.
    Last edited by paddyfool; 2020-12-18 at 02:14 PM.

  4. - Top - End - #394
    Dwarf in the Playground
     
    Flumph

    Join Date
    Aug 2019

    Default Re: Vending Machine

    You get a crazy cat lady.

    I insert a herd of cats.
    I can see it from the outside.
    And I know you're on the inside... lookin' out.


  5. - Top - End - #395
    Halfling in the Playground
     
    Imp

    Join Date
    Oct 2020
    Location
    In my head

    Default Re: Vending Machine

    You get a Congress of Baboons

    I insert a hastily scribbled score of "Joy to the World"

  6. - Top - End - #396
    Troll in the Playground
     
    Dr.Gunsforhands's Avatar

    Join Date
    Jul 2008

    Default Re: Vending Machine

    You misspelled come. You get a robe with gross stains on it to commemorate the horrible cult you've started.

    I insert my Mono-white Christmas MtG deck. It's 50 humans, 5 artifacts, 23 birds and some snow-covered plains.
    Nexusites, Angred, Dorothy.
    Avatar by the Ninja Chocobo.

  7. - Top - End - #397
    Ogre in the Playground
    Join Date
    Dec 2010
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: Vending Machine

    You receive a one-of-a-kind foil Santa Claus MtG card. He's a Legendary Creature - Elf with the ability "Tap: Each player may search their library for any card and put it in their hand, then shuffle their library."

    I insert a bottle of dish soap to clean out all the gross stuff that's in the machine.
    Quote Originally Posted by 2D8HP View Post
    Work is the scourge of the gaming classes!

  8. - Top - End - #398
    Halfling in the Playground
     
    Imp

    Join Date
    Oct 2020
    Location
    In my head

    Default Re: Vending Machine

    You get a set of fine white china. Each piece has a singular unwashable stain but otherwise is perfectly clean.

    I insert a bat that may or may not carry a plague

  9. - Top - End - #399
    Ogre in the Playground
     
    Odentin's Avatar

    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    Location
    Austin, TX
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: Vending Machine

    You receive a decapitated Ozzy Osborne.

    I insert a crazy train.
    -Odentin

    Quote Originally Posted by Skype
    Odentin: Wait. Weren't we going to stop off in the capital and murder the emperor?
    Bladecutter: We might as well, it's on the way.
    GM: "We might was well" has never been used in that way!
    Bladecutter: Well, we really don't like him...

  10. - Top - End - #400
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    Dire Moose's Avatar

    Join Date
    Nov 2009
    Location
    Arizona
    Gender
    Female

    Default Re: Vending Machine

    You get tied to the railroad tracks and run over while a mustache-twirling villain laughs at you.

    I insert my grandmother.
    LGBTitp

  11. - Top - End - #401
    Halfling in the Playground
     
    Imp

    Join Date
    Oct 2020
    Location
    In my head

    Default Re: Vending Machine

    You get a hard pinch on both cheeks. Also this tray of fresh baked snickerdoodles. Yum!

    I insert Mark Hamill who is dressed as Luke Skywalker but with Joker's color scheme.

  12. - Top - End - #402
    Troll in the Playground
     
    Dr.Gunsforhands's Avatar

    Join Date
    Jul 2008

    Default Re: Vending Machine

    You get Jack Nicholson dressed as Emperor Palpatine.

    I insert several board games.
    Nexusites, Angred, Dorothy.
    Avatar by the Ninja Chocobo.

  13. - Top - End - #403
    Pixie in the Playground
    Join Date
    Jan 2016

    Default Re: Vending Machine

    You get several tabletop simulator mods.

    I insert a quantum chessboard.

  14. - Top - End - #404
    Barbarian in the Playground
    Join Date
    Aug 2018

    Default Re: Vending Machine

    Quote Originally Posted by bug_sniper View Post
    I insert a quantum chessboard.
    You get a game of one dimensional Scrabble.

    I insert a VHS copy of Small Soldiers.

  15. - Top - End - #405
    Ogre in the Playground
    Join Date
    Dec 2010
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: Vending Machine

    You receive a copy of Army Men: Sarge's Heroes for the Nintendo 64.

    I insert a laserdisc player.
    Quote Originally Posted by 2D8HP View Post
    Work is the scourge of the gaming classes!

  16. - Top - End - #406
    Dwarf in the Playground
    Join Date
    Mar 2020

    Default Re: Vending Machine

    You get a lazerdisc slayer. Watch out!

    I insert mudkipz.

  17. - Top - End - #407
    Orc in the Playground
     
    Imp

    Join Date
    Feb 2006
    Location
    Ubiquitous
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: Vending Machine

    You get the Very Hangry Caterpie

    I insert the complete works of Machiavelli
    This is a boring signature.
    EXPLOSIVE RUNES
    EXPLODED RUNES
    PICTURE OF A CAT
    EXPLOSIVE RUNES

  18. - Top - End - #408
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    Dire Moose's Avatar

    Join Date
    Nov 2009
    Location
    Arizona
    Gender
    Female

    Default Re: Vending Machine

    You get backstabbed by a ruthless, ambitious tyrant.

    I insert twelve drummers drumming, eleven pipers piping, ten lords a-leaping, nine ladies dancing, eight maids a-milking, seven swans a-swimming, six geese a-laying, five golden rings, four calling birds, three French hens, two turtledoves, and a partridge in a pear tree.
    LGBTitp

  19. - Top - End - #409
    Halfling in the Playground
     
    Imp

    Join Date
    Oct 2020
    Location
    In my head

    Default Re: Vending Machine

    You get the Special Operations Unit from the Reverse Questioning thread.

    I insert several threads about making wishes

  20. - Top - End - #410
    Ogre in the Playground
    Join Date
    Dec 2010
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: Vending Machine

    You receive a visit from the Wishmaster.

    I insert homemade pasta salad.
    Quote Originally Posted by 2D8HP View Post
    Work is the scourge of the gaming classes!

  21. - Top - End - #411
    Ogre in the Playground
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Location
    London, UK

    Default Re: Vending Machine

    You get homemade sfogliatelle and gelato.

    I insert a fully decorated Christmas Tree.

  22. - Top - End - #412
    Halfling in the Playground
     
    Imp

    Join Date
    Oct 2020
    Location
    In my head

    Default Re: Vending Machine

    You get a menorah, a dreidel, and a yamaca

    I insert a vial of untested flem from a coughing person

  23. - Top - End - #413
    Dwarf in the Playground
    Join Date
    Mar 2020

    Default Re: Vending Machine

    You get a bunch of CDC doctors in space suits, a bunch of black helicopters, military men putting up barbed wire, a container full of vaccines, and an apple.

    I insert a note with commentary that says Corona is just SARS 2.0 and everyone's totally overreacting about this.

  24. - Top - End - #414
    Pixie in the Playground
    Join Date
    Jan 2016

    Default Re: Vending Machine

    Like every other optimistic message about covid, it turns out to be wrong. You get a new strain that makes its victims bleed like they've got ebola.

    I insert a needle with bleach in it.
    Last edited by bug_sniper; 2020-12-25 at 06:44 PM.

  25. - Top - End - #415
    Barbarian in the Playground
    Join Date
    Aug 2018

    Default Re: Vending Machine

    Quote Originally Posted by bug_sniper View Post
    I insert a needle with bleach in it.
    You get a Bleach manga with a needle in it.

    I insert a rorschach inkblot test.

  26. - Top - End - #416
    Troll in the Playground
     
    Dr.Gunsforhands's Avatar

    Join Date
    Jul 2008

    Default Re: Vending Machine

    You get a bunch of crabs and butterflies.

    I insert YOU!
    Nexusites, Angred, Dorothy.
    Avatar by the Ninja Chocobo.

  27. - Top - End - #417
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    Dire Moose's Avatar

    Join Date
    Nov 2009
    Location
    Arizona
    Gender
    Female

    Default Re: Vending Machine

    You get SOVIET RUSSIA!

    I insert a goat.
    LGBTitp

  28. - Top - End - #418
    Dwarf in the Playground
    Join Date
    Mar 2020

    Default Re: Vending Machine

    You get a cute little bunny and a pile of bones. I'm sure you know what happens next.

    I insert the remains of Guns with a note that says 'tis was just a flesh wound!'

  29. - Top - End - #419
    Dwarf in the Playground
     
    Flumph

    Join Date
    Aug 2019

    Default Re: Vending Machine

    You get a new copy of the good doctor, dressed in black armor and missing an arm.

    I insert a fortress full of taunt-loving Frenchmen.
    I can see it from the outside.
    And I know you're on the inside... lookin' out.


  30. - Top - End - #420
    Dwarf in the Playground
    Join Date
    Mar 2020

    Default Re: Vending Machine

    You get a giant bag of air that expels methane in your general direction.

    I insert a cardboard cutout of a castle.

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