Who does Durkon want to marry less than Belkar?

[Benoojian]

Durkon said Belkar was like his 4th choice just in the party, which leaves us with someone he wants less than Belkar.

1.
2.
3.
4.Belkar
5.

And that's assuming he wasn't counting animal companions.

[Fyraltari]

Whoever you think is funniest.

[Grand Arbiter]

From a logical standpoint I’d wager Vaarsuvius is number 5, because afaik they haven’t shared their spouse requesting a divorce with the party.

Else, see Fyraltari’s response ^

[D.One]

Durkon said Belkar was like his 4th choice just in the party, which leaves us with someone he wants less than Belkar.

1.
2.
3.
4.Belkar
5.

And that's assuming he wasn't counting animal companions.

No one. In dwarven language, the word for fourth, Kah'erth, sounds very similar to the word for last, Kaerf, and what Durkon was really saying was that Belkar was the last member of the party he would ever marry.

(Also, I'm making this up ;-P )

[Windscion]

Im agreeing with Libro.
Mostly for the same reaons, but there's also the divine/arcane spellcaster issue, to say nothing of the dwarf/elf thing.

Also, a side note. Just because two people are broken up doesn't mean they are broken up. Always wait and see.

[Draconi Redfir]

Probably Elan.

in the party my guess would be

1. Haley
2. Roy
3. Vaarsuvius
4. Belkar
5. Elan


it just makes sense.

[Peelee]

Whoever you think is funniest.

My money's on this.

[Grey Watcher]

Whoever you think is funniest.

My money's on this.

Yeah, I figure the lack of clarification is a joke unto itself. Not unlike, say, the Elan's original plan for getting back to Azure City. Hinting at it without stating makes for a better joke than just stating it.

That said, this forum would be nothing without wild, unfounded speculation, so carry on, I say!

[woweedd]

You're reading too deeply into what is, even in-universe, an off-the-cuff joke? But, if I had to guess, V.

[Benoojian]

Damn, I wanted there to be competing theories (like whether Haley or Elan would drive him crazy first) but Durkon's already established trait of "my anaconda don't want none if you got a ring, son" makes V pretty certain.

[Cicciograna]

1. Me
2. You
3. Roland St. Jude
4. Belkar
5. Me

[Emanick]

Probably Elan.

in the party my guess would be

1. Haley
2. Roy
3. Vaarsuvius
4. Belkar
5. Elan


it just makes sense.

Switch Elan and V, and that's my guess as well. (As for why, see Libro's post.)

[Fyraltari]

Else, see Fyraltari’s response ^

My money's on this.

Yeah, I figure the lack of clarification is a joke unto itself.

This is why I like it when I get early to a thread; witty* replies don't have the same punch a dozen posts down.


*Your mileage may vary.

[Grey Watcher]

This is why I like it when I get early to a thread; witty* replies don't have the same punch a dozen posts down.


*Your mileage may vary.

Of course not. That low, and it's more likely a kick.

[skim172]

Well, we know that Durkon is definitely attracted to Helga. And we know that he's not attracted to Belkar.
Therefore, by contrasting the attributes of those two, we can determine what Durkon finds most attractive.

And obviously, the answer is Helga's long blonde French braids. He finds that well hot. In comparison, Belkar's got hair like brownish fuzz growing on an egg.

So, we can determine this is Durkon's hawtness order:
0. Helga (sexy long blonde braids)
1. Elan (sexy blonde, no braids)
2. Haley (long hair, orange is sort of like blonde)
3. Vaarsuvius (purple? ugh)
4. Belkar (fuzz on an egg)
5. Roy (nuff said)

It's just logical.

Bald men just can't get a break. Even with hair-fetishist fantasy dwarves.

[Fyraltari]

skip

Hilgya's name is spelled H-i-l-g-y-a.

[skim172]

Hilgya's name is spelled H-i-l-g-y-a.

Dang.

[Peelee]

This is why I like it when I get early to a thread; witty* replies don't have the same punch a dozen posts down.

On the other hand, that means everyone else is punching up.

[Fyraltari]

Of course not. That low, and it's more likely a kick.

I should have seen this coming. But I didn't and so I let my guard down.

On the other hand, that means everyone else is punching up.

Now, that's a low blow.

[Ruck]

Previous thread.

[Draconi Redfir]

Switch Elan and V, and that's my guess as well. (As for why, see Libro's post.)

i figure it's a "If he absolutely HAS to marry someone in the party" scenario.

Haley would be his first pick because he's attracted to women more then men

Roy is second choice because the two are close friends

V is third choice because they're both intellectuals that can tolerate and respect eachother's presence

Belkar is next

Elan is last because it's really hard to to tolerate the guy if you're not Haley.


Basically i'm looking at it as if the the whole people-already-married thing wasn't an issue.

[Emanick]

i figure it's a "If he absolutely HAS to marry someone in the party" scenario.

Haley would be his first pick because he's attracted to women more then men

Roy is second choice because the two are close friends

V is third choice because they're both intellectuals that can tolerate and respect eachother's presence

Belkar is next

Elan is last because it's really hard to to tolerate the guy if you're not Haley.


Basically i'm looking at it as if the the whole people-already-married thing wasn't an issue.

Makes sense. I was looking at it as if he had to marry one of them but there were no actual changes in anyone's relationship status. It's kind of hard to see him preferring Belkar over Elan (or anyone else) otherwise. (Unless, that is, Skim's Hair Theorem is correct. )

[The Pilgrim]

V is last as she is already married as far as Durkon knows.

[D.One]

On the other hand, that means everyone else is punching up.

Now, that's a low blow.

No, it's not. It's a shoryuken.

[Precure]

1. Vaarsuvius
2. Haley
3. Elan
4. Belkar
5. Roy

[Ionathus]

Yeah, I figure the lack of clarification is a joke unto itself. Not unlike, say, the Elan's original plan for getting back to Azure City. Hinting at it without stating makes for a better joke than just stating it.

Honestly, I don't really see it as a joke so much as an interesting character beat for Belkar.

If everyone in the party truly, 100% hated him, he'd be dead last in everyone's books. The fact that he's actually 4th, with Durkon at least, gives him a small bond with Durkon that the strip immediately expands on when the two of them discuss HARDCORE INTROSPECTION.

Part of it might even be connected to "Belkar was the only one who caught on to Durkula early." The two of them are forming a bit of a camaraderie, potentially to twist the knife on Belkar's impending death even harder.

[Seward]

My theory is that Durkon would be thinking more along the terms of who would make a good mate/alliance for his clan rather than sexual attraction for most of the choices although his early-strip reaction to Haley's wardrobe malfunction might help mitigate his likely aversion to her chaotic ways.

I'd guess Roy first for a spouse, due to their bromance and compatable alignments/worldview, Elan next for his good heart and Haley third for sexual attraction. Varsuvius dead last, after Belkar, probably because Varsuvius has a mate, even if the divorce papers are now final, plus the whole Familiacide/deal with fiends would probably bring long term dangers to his clan.

[Ruck]

My theory is that Durkon would be thinking more along the terms of who would make a good mate/alliance for his clan rather than sexual attraction for most of the choices although his early-strip reaction to Haley's wardrobe malfunction might help mitigate his likely aversion to her chaotic ways.

I'd guess Roy first for a spouse, due to their bromance and compatable alignments/worldview, Elan next for his good heart and Haley third for sexual attraction. Varsuvius dead last, after Belkar, probably because Varsuvius has a mate, even if the divorce papers are now final, plus the whole Familiacide/deal with fiends would probably bring long term dangers to his clan.

So, more or less my answer.

Oh, before I forget, here are my rankings of Durkon's view on OOTS marriage partners:

If he's heterosexual: Haley, Roy, Elan, Belkar, Vaarsuvius
If he's not: Roy, Elan, Haley, Belkar, Vaarsuvius

I put Elan over Haley in case #2 because he's more honest and kind than her, and I think that matters to Durkon. I put Vaarsuvius last due to V's tendency to solve interpersonal conflicts with arcane destruction-- V may be improving in that regard, but given Durkon's most recent relationship experience, I think he's going to be pretty reluctant to be in a marriage where that is on the table.

[trtl]

All things considered, I'm going to agree with V being dead last. I'm pretty sure the rest of the party doesn't know V is divorced right now, here's my ranking

1. Haley
2. Roy
3. Elan
4. Belkar
5. Vaarsuvius

If Durkon is bi than Roy and Haley would probably switch. Unless Durkon sees Roy in to professional a light to consider him romantically, he seems to have a respect for Roy that he doesn't share with the rest of the party.

You're reading too deeply into what is, even in-universe, an off-the-cuff joke? But, if I had to guess, V.

Have you seen some of the things this Forum analyzes?

[The_Weirdo]

It gets weirder if we consider that the OOTS has three or, possibly, if you count Banjo, four non-humanoid members (Blackwing, Mr. Scruffy and Bloodfeast). In that case, Belkar being fourth out of eight or nine isn't that big of a deal, but shame on you, Durkon! Shame on you!!!