Princess Bride mashups

[Jay R]

Awhile ago, I was in a strange mood, and put the following quotes together.

"Mawidge. Mawidge is what bwings us togevver today. Mawidge, that bwessed awangement, that dweam wiffin a dweam."
"You keep using that word. I do not think it's pronounced the way you think it's pronounced."

"It’s very strange. I have been in the revenge business so long, now that it's over, I don't know what to do with the rest of my life."
"Murdered by pirates is good."

"You can't hurt me. Westley and I are joined by the bonds of love. And you cannot track that, not with a thousand bloodhounds, and you cannot break it, not with a thousand swords."
"Well, why didn't you list that among our assets in the first place?"

"There's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. It would be a pity to damage yours."
"It's just they're terribly comfortable. I think everyone will be wearing them in the future."

“Since the invention of the kiss, there have been five kisses rated the most passionate, the most pure. This one left them all behind.”
“Look, I don't mean to be rude but this is not as easy as it looks, so I'd appreciate it if you wouldn't distract me.”

“He didn’t fall? Inconceivable.”
“Get used to disappointment.”

“Your true love lives. And you marry another. True Love saved her in the Fire Swamp, and she treated it like garbage. And that's what she is, the Queen of Refuse. So bow down to her if you want, bow to her. Bow to the Queen of Slime, the Queen of Filth, the Queen of Putrescence. Boo. Boo. Rubbish. Filth. Slime. Muck. Boo. Boo. Boo.”
“My way's not very sportsman-like.”

“And remember this, never forget this: when I found you, you were so slobbering drunk, you couldn't buy brandy!”
“I ought to be after twenty years.”

“Is this a kissing book?”
“What happens to her is not truly your concern.”

“Hey! Hello in there! Hey, what's so important? What have you got here that's worth living for?”
“I've got my country's 500th anniversary to plan, my wedding to arrange, my wife to murder and Guilder to frame for it; I'm swamped.”

“We are men of action, you and I. Lies do not become us.”
“Get used to disappointment.”

Prince Humperdinck: I've got my country's 500th anniversary to plan, my wedding to arrange, my wife to murder and Guilder to frame for it; I'm swamped.
Man in Black: Life is pain, Highness. Anyone who says differently is selling something.

Dread Pirate Roberts: Good night, Westley. Good work. Sleep well. I'll most likely kill you in the morning.
Westley: There will never be a need.

[InvisibleBison]

Delightful!

[Saintheart]

"That may be the first time in my life a man has dared insult me."
"Some day you may not mind so much."


"Form a Brute Squad!"
"You are the Brute Squad."


"Buttercup was raised on a small farm in the country of Florin. Her favorite pastimes were riding her horse and tormenting the farm boy that worked there. His name was Westley, but she never called him that. Isn't that a wonderful beginning?"
"Look, I don't mean to be rude but this is not as easy as it looks, so I'd appreciate it if you wouldn't distract me.”


"You only think I guessed wrong! That's what's so funny! I switched glasses when your back was turned! Ha ha! You fool! You fell victim to one of the classic blunders - The most famous of which is 'never get involved in a land war in Asia' - but only slightly less well-known is this: 'Never go against a Sicilian when death is on the line!' Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!"
"Yeah, yeah, you're very smart. Now shut up."

[paddyfool]

"My name is Inigo Montoya, you killed my father prepare to die!"
"As you wish"
[Choking sound from the end of the duel of wits]
"He's only mostly dead"

EDIT: I'm fairly sure that if this conversation continued much further it would end up as an Inigo / Wesley slashfic, given how many of the more famous quotes are about love.