Home 26: Rooms to let, fifty cents

[Deathkeeper]

[Jade's Lair]

Okay, well. I can certainly try to tie it off before it gets any bigger. The fact that you seem to be able to zap people like you got zapped is kind of worrying. Even if at the moment it's helpful for your boyfriend. Now, I think that trying to reign it in completely to just make you a girl has two problems. One, it would use up my juice when I need to help your boyfriend and minor gods like me don't get an unlimited supply of miracles. Only stuff that usually comes for free for me is farming, growing plants, and keeping animal populations up. Oh and safe births! I'm really good at those blessings in Winter and Spring. And uh, if I had to push that hard with my powers you might end up with at least some fuzzy ears. Like I said. Kind of what happens when a god especially tuned to animalfolk has to bring out the big guns. So yeah, I can at least try to like....put it in a small pot so it doesn't grow? Does that analogy work?

[Felix's Tower]

Krayger smiles, moving a bit closer to examine the equipment. His natural inclination is that he probably should have showered before he had to spend a while next to Felix but...if anyone isn't going to care about standing next to a sweaty minotaur, it's the wizard who keeps livestock in his own home.
"Ah. So we're working with chemicals right now? Or are you planning on sending me straight off on another quest?" Krayger wouldn't put it past him for either. Felix is definitely a mysterious one. A mysterious one who has no problems making his apprentice work very hard.

[bc56]

Jade's Lair

"How small are we talking about here? I want to be able to use it still, in case you can't fully help Aries. And it makes all my clothes fit perfectly, so I don't really want to lose that either." And it's proved useful as a distraction, and an interrogation technique. It's surprising how useful it seems to be on occasion. "Really, I just need to know if there are any hidden effects I don't know about."

[Deathkeeper]

[Jade's Lair]

Well, when you put a tree in a pot it doesn't get bigger, but it doesn't get smaller. Sorry, clearly the wrong audience for that analogy. I'm saying I'd just be trying to keep it from getting bigger. But uh, if you are happy enough with it maybe I should work on that after you talk to your boyfriend? Whenever or however you do that. Do nymphs have cell phones, or do they fry things? I've found despite my domains tech plays nice with me.
Wicke wonders if people used to think that he looked funny, being a teenage centaur with a cell phone at his ear. He misses being able to walk around the city without things being weird.

[bc56]

Jade's Lair

"Oh, right! I'm supposed to plant a magic tree!" Jade locates the plum out from last night. "I don't really have a good place for it though." Definitely not in here, but outside isn't much better. "There's an empty lot a few buildings west of here, but I don't think I want to plant it there."

[Deathkeeper]

[Jade's Lair]

Um. So. How tall is the ceiling in there? How much space? What kind of tree? Wicke asks, interest creeping into his voice.
Because if this is a matter of plant-growing you kind of came to the right god.

[Ashen Lilies]

[Cass Tower - Pondside]

Electra holds the kiss for a brief instant, then gives Cass a smile as she dismounts the bike alongside the sorceress, before taking Cass's hand as they wander away. She's quiet for a few moments, enjoying the companionship and the scenery, her gentle smile one of contentment. She looks like she might start humming again, but for now seems to be holding it in.

[Cass' Tower - Pondside]

Cass smiles contentedly, keeping one arm around Electra's waist and leaning on her slightly as they wander along the shore. It's not really one for the postcards - the beach is rough and gritty, poked through with weeds and pebbles, and around them is mostly just meadow and few low hills, dotted with the occasional distant farmstead. Behind them, the way they came, Cass' tower is easily visible as the area's most notable landmark, a lonely monolith thrusting upwards from its hilltop. Cass takes her head off of Electra's shoulder and looks at her, seeming to detect something about her.
"Song stuck in your head?"

[bc56]

Jade's Lair

Jade looks around. "Used to be a warehouse, so the ceiling's pretty high. It's a plum tree. But there's no sunlight or dirt. Floor's concrete, no windows." She thinks about it. "I suppose I could set up some grow lamps, but I feel like I should make sure the tree is healthy, and I'm not sure that's enough."

[Deathkeeper]

[Jade’s Lair]

Well, if you have any of the space outside I could help you plant it there. But if it’s a magic tree I don’t know if I would trust it sticking around in Skyside. If you want say the word and I can give you a magic pot to make a plant grow indoors. It won’t even take any juice because I already made one!
...
But then no one used it because nobody back at the Skullfort needed to grow crops indoors since they have farmland. So it’s collecting dust in the temple. There’s the sound of a celestial sigh. Not all his ideas are winners.

[bc56]

Jade's Lair

"I'm actually in Inside. Just not the best part of town. Sure, I'll take a magic pot. That sounds pretty useful for me." Jade waits to see if the pot appears. "Can I get some dirt with it? Saves having to dig up part of an empty lot." Jade's glad she can help Walter and make one of his old projects useful.

[Deathkeeper]

[Jade's Lair]

But of course. Drones Wicke, sounding extremely pleased with himself.
With a puff of orange-tinted orange leaves, a very large tree-sized pot appears before her, with soft potting soil already nestled within. It's also sitting on a little wheeled platform.
Yeah that's heavy so I threw in a dolly. Is that what you call these things? I don't really remember. Put it where you want it.

[bc56]

Jade's Lair

Jade takes the dolly (that is what it's called) and wheels the pot over to a nice spot in the corner. She sets it down, pulls the dolly away, and then gently presses the plum pit into the soil. She doesn't expect anything to happen right away, even magical trees must take time to grow, right. "There. All set."

[Deathkeeper]

[Jade's Lair]

Um. Okay. Well. Is this thing supposed to grow right away or just as normal? Nymphs have a pretty wide range of magic trees. You should water it either way.
Not that I can tell what's going on over there either way. Maybe I should go over there. I'd just need a circle and some crops. Wicke suggests.

[bc56]

Jade's Lair

"I have vegetables in the fridge. Does that count?" Jade isn't the type to have crops readily available. She goes and fills up a pitcher with water and then waters the tree (which is already a sprout and not a seed) before speaking to it. "Hey, is this thing on? Testing, testing, 1 2 3 testing."

[Rebonack]

[Jade's Lair]

A sprout?

No.

You are mistaken, Jade.

It is a sapling.

A mystic wind rustles the branches despite the fact they're indoors.

I can hear you, Jade. I, umm, need a few minutes. The tree is still too small.

Tree indeed. It's about five feet tall and covered in little white plum blossoms now.

Um... when I come through I'll be n-naked. Do you have an extra shirt I could borrow, maybe? If that's o-okay with you, I mean.

[Deathkeeper]

[Jade’s Lair]

A circle made of something metallic or with candles and something related to crops or livestock in a few basic directions is the easiest way to summon me. It’s hard to explain but it’s like...imagine trying to get a current to get somewhere. You CAN get it to arc through the air but it’s way easier to just stick a wire between two things. I could zap myself there like I did before but I’m trying to be efficient here.

[bc56]

Jade's Lair

"I'll get you a shirt, Aries. One sec." Jade goes into another room and starts a large crane-like machine, punching in a few commands. "This'll get you the circle, hang on a sec while I grab the food and a shirt." Jade heads up and grabs a t-shirt from her closet and, after a moment of thought, an old pair of sweat pants, just in case. She heads downstairs and grabs a few ears of corn and carrots from the fridge. "Okay, I got the stuff." She says to both people as she goes back to the machine and removes a large metal ring from its tray.

[Rebonack]

[Jade’s Lair]

Five feet?

Haha, no, fifteen.

Normally wild plums are small, brushy sorts of trees. But when the Plum Sisters are involved they have a habit of getting much larger. This one is already as wide as the pot! Hopefully it doesn't go and pop apart all of a sudden.

Rather abruptly the tree seems to kind of... flinch?

Is that the right word for it?

Like its growth just stops all of a sudden.

Then a hand emerges from it. Then Lambslaural's cautious face. She glances around, then down. "Oh! The tree's in a pot. I thought... um... I thought that felt kind of tight..."

She's moving around in the tree as if it weren't even there. It's kind of weird to watch. She'll bend down, careful to keep her torso inside the trunk, and grabs the shirt. "Thank you, Jade," she says with a kind smile as she cautiously and somewhat awkwardly climbs out of the tree and off the pot. That step down is kind of a doozy. Then she'll turn around and slip the shirt on.

"Is this your home?" Lambslaural asks, looking around appreciatively. "It looks... industrial?"

[Deathkeeper]

Jade’s Lair

Okay. Just put the crops on the circle in a regular pattern. The cardinal directions work best but I can’t expect you to have a compass on you. Then invoke my name. Which is Wicke at the moment. I feel like I did tell you it would be changing but just making sure.
Wicke is oblivious to the fact that someone else has entered the room, though he thinks it sounds like she’s already talking to the tree.
Lambslaurel might sense a vague twinge of power around Jade. Almost like when she was hosting Chestnut. But that was an entire mantle of Autumn. This is just a tiny hint of power, like a faint whiff of warm cider.

[bc56]

Jade's Lair

"Glad you could make it." Jade sets the big steel ring she's carrying down on the ground well away from Lambslaural. She begins arranging the corn and carrots around it. As it happens, she does know which way the cardinal directions are, so that's not too hard. "So, I know a god that could maybe help with the, you know, manhood problem." The way Jade says it, knowing a god is a pretty normal thing. She doesn't have any special reverence for Wicke.

[Rebonack]

[Jade's Lair]

"O-oh. Um... that sounds nice?" Lambslaural replies, fidgeting with her fingers. "Are you sure you don't want to just use your powers on me? I don't want to be a bother."

It's true.

She doesn't.

She is also really, really hoping that maybe a god CAN do something about this?

She doesn't want to seem ungrateful about all the wonderful things she has...

...but she would really like NOT being a she.

But at the same time, she isn't sure how possible that even is.

Nymphs are beautiful women. That's just how things work.

"You d-did say that you were hoping to get more practice. And I, um, I don't mind."

[bc56]

Jade's Lair

"Trust me, he'd be happy to help. I've already talked to him about it a bit." When Lambslaural offers to let Jade transform her again, the heroine immediately takes her up on the offer and unleashes her power. But she looks away while doing it. "Take these pants. You'll need them." She passes the sweat pants to Aries. "What do you say, should I summon my friend? He can at least look you over."

[Rebonack]

[Jade's Lair]

Oh no.

Aries is hot again.

He quickly slips the pants on and mostly manages to maintain his balance despite the lack of back legs.

"Thanks," he says. "Really, thank you. If your friend can find a way to make this permanent I, um, well. I think that would be great."

He offers a pretty smokin' smile to Jade.

"But if he can't I wouldn't mind much if you magiced me every time we got together," he adds. "That would, um, that would give me something else to look forward to?"

Was that dumb?

It sounded dumb. He's trying to sound cool.

Why is he so bad at this?

[bc56]

Jade's Lair

Jade blushes and smiles at Aries. He might be trying to sound cool and seductive, but to Jade, his uncertainty comes across as cute. "Okay, here goes nothing. Hey Wicke!?" Does that work? She thinks it will work. But she's not used to this.

[Deathkeeper]

[Jade’s Lair]

The wind kicks up (impossibly) and an enormous centaur appears in Jade’s circle. He looks like, well.
If Jade ever imagined what Walter’s dad would look like, he looks like that. A huge workhorse body with a gray coat attached to a bulky man who looks like he’s never not worked a day in his life. His salt-and-pepper hair is cut short like Walter’s, but the short, thick beard is new. He’s wearing the autumn-colored scarf he was last time. And nothing else, just like last time.
”Ah, good, Jade. You’re starting to get used to this. But you don’t have to shout, especially since I was already listening. If you ever need to call someone else try adding a flattering title. Like O Bearer of Autumn or something like that. But you don’t need to be formal with me.”
His equine ears flick and he draws his attention to Aries.
”Ah, hello young man! You must be the lucky fellow. Jade must have already done her thing. I might need to look at your normal self but we’ll get to that later. Wow, Jade. I thought he was a deer. That’s what I heard. Did you change his whole leg structure? That’s a lot. Anyway, Wicke, god of growth and change and homesteads, at your service.” Wicke offers Aries a hand to shake.

[Rebonack]

[Jade’s Lair]

Oh hey.

There's a horse guy in here now.

Wow is he ever big.

And shirtless.

"Um... nice to meet you, sir?" Aries replies, taking the hand-shake politely. He's no limp-limbed slouch in that department! He knows how to give a good, solid hand-shake. "Oh, um, I'm not a deer. I'm a gaiad. Which is a sort of nymph that inhabits landscapes instead of stones or trees or streams."

Technically there are a while bunch of specific names for specific types of land forms. Like meadows or pastures or woodlands or what have you. But no one has time for that just like they don't have time for a different sort of -ad for every single different type of tree or body of water.

Anywho!

"I was part of a ritual that made my sisters and I grow up quickly. Our weald is Plum Mounter Park, it's hard to miss."

It is, after all, pretty big.

If we want to be technical nymphs are already minor goddesses of a sort in their own right.

[bc56]

Jade's Lair

Jade glances at Aries' legs again. "Yeah, I guess I did." It didn't seem that impressive to her, but then again she was distracted with going "wow he's hot." She hangs back a bit to let the other two get to know each other.

[Deathkeeper]

[Jade’s Lair]

Wicke frowns. Oh, dear, did he make Jade’s boyfriend uncomfortable already?
”Terribly sorry about that. Just a slang. I know what you are. Jade mentioned it and my sister Willa reads me the news sometimes when I can’t see things myself. My animal aspect changes weekly so I’ve gotten into the habit of calling myself whatever my legs indicate. Probably not proper centaur etiquette but well, no one in this room was born the way they are now, were we?” he hopes that joke goes over well because it could totally not and he didn’t realize how badly that might blow up in his face until the words came out of his mouth.
”Anyway yes. I do know the Park. I wish I could see it properly. I miss Inside so much.” he says sadly.

[Rebonack]

[Jade’s Lair]

"O-oh! It's alright. I shouldn't have been so terse about it," Aries quickly apologizes. He picks up on things pretty easily. Ton, body language, that sort of thing. He's pretty good at reading people. "I think Jade's magic probably gave me the right sort of legs since that's what she thinks looks nice. And, um, because that's what I think I'm supposed to have, too. Before all the... weird."

Inside has just so much weird.

At least it wasn't Libra's fault this time.

"So... do you think you might be able to make this permanent? Maybe?" Aries asks.

Oh.

Oh no.

Then sad happens.

Immediately Aries looks concerned. "A-are you alright, sir? Is everything okay? I m-mean you don't have to talk about it if you don't want to."

Aries one hundred percent knows that something here is wrong. Sort of like how she can tell something is really bugging Snapdragon even though Snapdragon is good at hiding things that bother her.

Unlike this guy.

This guy is terrible at hiding things that bother him.

[bc56]

Jade's Lair

"There's got to be some way we can help you have a real physical presence here." Jade says to Wicke. "It's not right for you to be trapped outside reality all the time." Jade would workshop containment methods for gods, maybe try to create a mechanical vessel, but she's no good at the magical stuff. She doesn't have the faintest clue where to begin. She also resolves to contact W more often.

[Deathkeeper]

[Jade’s Lair]

Wicke nods confidently to Aries.
”I’m sure I can do something. But I’m going to focus on things outside of your animal aspect. For obvious reasons, taking away animal-legs is harder for me than giving them and I would rather focus on the biggest issue here.”
”No, no, it’s nothing you two can do anything about. My role means I have to help people and answer prayers. Until I get a following to power that I can’t go around selfishly using my energy just to manifest and visit.” He says properly before, well, breaking.
”But well, before I had my little apotheosis did you know I was barely 20? Willa and I have been zapped by so many things sequentially that Luna literally chose her as an Exalt because she was impressed at just how much Willa had put up with! And she’s not even the one who has to change every week for the rest of forever uncontrollably! But it’s fine. Willa is an Exalt now and those are good at breaking rules and punching gods. Eventually we’ll find some reputable way to rip Change out of my portfolio so I don’t have to be a dairy cow six weeks of the year. Means I won’t be able to help folks like you nearly as much, though. Sacrifices.” The nice thing about being a god is that you don’t change yourself very quickly except when it’s part of your portfolio, so it will be a while before W’s optimism starts to crack.