MERC XIX: Toss a Coin to your Goblin

[Ironsmith]

[Kitchen]

"I was under the impression that was sort of a universal ethical guideline." Rose replies, deftly chopping the root Olvisin had shown her. "Seems like the kind of thing you wouldn't really need to single out, though. Like making it a policy to never work with a serial killer. So." She gives a rueful little smile. "I'm guessing you're about to tell me there's some history there."

[Morty]

[Kitchen]

"History isn't my strongest subject, but I think most southern goblins were enslaved by humans once. Back when humans called all the shots. But when the humans started loosing their footing, the goblins took their chance and really did a number on them." Olvisin examines the fish. It seems about ready to be put in the oven. "They were led by a prophet of the 'One Below'. That's the biggest religion down there now. Never gained much ground back home, not for lack of trying."

[Ironsmith]

[Kitchen]

Rose shrugs. "Religions tend to spread better under those sorts of circumstances." She says nonchalantly, pulling open the oven. "Desperation in bad times, complacency in good, there's a strong correlation between when people need help from a higher power and when they go looking for it." She slides their fish onto the central rack and slams the oven door shut, earning a wince from Siana across the room. "How are relations around there now? The boss doesn't seem to have any problems with humans, but take it from me, history of that sort isn't usually forgiven overnight."

[Morty]

[Kitchen]

"Tense, from what I hear." Olvisin leans in a little to look into the oven. "But humans' time has ended. They don't have a lot of power anymore. Makes it easier to live and let live. The boss doesn't let that get in the way of making money, anyway. He spent years among other races. Don't know why he left his home colony and he doesn't like the subject. But it's why there's so many of us here. One misfit attracts more."

[Ironsmith]

[Kitchen]

"Makes sense to me." Rose agrees. "So, were you, ah, the weird kid, growing up?" She asks a little abruptly, keeping her eyes on their fish. "I mean, you fit the profile. Physically abnormal, don't really like to talk about yourself very much, but very easy to persuade with a little peer pressure. Classic out-group st- oh dammit, I said that out loud, didn't I?" She gives an awkward little hiss. "Sorry. I usually keep that behind a filter. If I say something that bothers you, please let me know. I'm always just a bit too candid after a mission."

[Morty]

[Kitchen]

Olvisin's ears perk up. That is a pretty personal question right there. And Rose seems to have been reading her like a book this whole time. She can't deny it stings a little. But let's give her something she probably hasn't figured out yet. She didn't intend to reveal that just yet, but it seems Rose has prodded her a little.

"Well, I'm transgender, for one thing. My family rolled with it well enough, but there was a time when... things were awkward. Maybe it stuck with me just a little bit."

[Ironsmith]

[Kitchen]

Rose gives a little snrk in amusement as Olvisin makes her declaration. "Sorry, sorry." She says, shaking her head lightly. "That was just unexpected, that's all. I thought you were going to tell me you were just, like, the biggest nerd back in goblin high school or something. You know, since you went on to be an engineer and all." She gives Olvisin a little pat on the shoulder. "In any case, good for you. It's nice to have a family you can rely on like that." Rose gives a rueful little smile and a shrug before turning her attention back to the oven. "Speaking of, how many of you guys are there, anyway? I saw your sister when I first came in, and I remember hearing a couple other names tossed around... I want to say five total? Four? Am I close?"

[Morty]

[Kitchen]

Olvisin can't help but smile a little. She managed to surprise Miss Spy after all.

"Wanting to be an engineer is hardly a reason for shunning someone back home. It's one of the most prestigious positions around. Especially if you're not slated to be the head of a family. Anyway, I work here with three of my siblings. Zaalmin, whom you've met, and my brothers Kuvesh and Luuvat. We're quadruplets. And we have three younger siblings, who stayed home."

[Ironsmith]

[Kitchen]

Rose lets out a low whistle of surprise. "Seven. Wow. And four of you at once. I feel kind of bad for your mother." She gives a little smile. "Mine stopped at three. I'm the youngest. Two big brothers. It shows, doesn't it?" She giggles a little and looks into the oven.

"So. Um. I'm not real familiar with goblin cuisine, but..." She points at the fish. "Is it supposed to be moving like that?"

[Morty]

[Kitchen]

Olvisin peers into the oven and her ears dip in what is probably consternation.

"...no, it's not supposed to be... bubbling and flaking like that. We might have overdone it with the sauce. Or the temperature. Or something else."

[Ironsmith]

[Kitchen]

"Wouldn't surprise me." Rose shrugs and retrieves an oven mitt (which is probably a little too big for her), pulling open the oven to rescue what remains of their fish dish. "Maybe it's still edible? I mean, this looks like we've overcooked it if anything, so it should be safe, right? Just not exactly the sort of succulent seafood you'd hope for."

[Morty]

[Kitchen]

"I guess so." Olvisin's ears fold back a little. "I did say I'm not a very good cook. I saw my aunt do amazing things with this fish. But turns out I don't remember it as well as I thought."

[Ironsmith]

[Kitchen]

"Well, hey, you learn by doing." Rose smiles and cuts into the fish, a little spurt of steam puffing out where the knife makes contact. "And who knows? Maybe it tastes better than it looks." She gives Olvisin a little shrug, waving around a sampling of the fish on the tip od her fork. "I mean, the actual cook is important, but it's not the be-all. I'm sure you still got the choice of meat and spice and all of that right. So, down the hatch it goes!"

gulp

...Oh, no.

[Morty]

[Kitchen]

Rose will learn two things. One, that isn't really much of a revelation, that eating something straight out of the oven is unpleasant. Second, the spices Olvisin used are intense, hot and sour, quite likely unlike anything Rose has ever tasted. Third, Olvisin used a lot of them - because she doesn't remember the recipe very well and doesn't do anything by halves on a general basis.

[Ironsmith]

[Kitchen]

Ugh, that is horrible. Not just bad, but giftedly bad. The sort of bad that makes onlookers stop and wonder how that even happened. Between the texture and the overpoweringly sour taste, Rose's first instinct is to wonder if they hadn't somehow caused the fish to rot. It certainly tasted like it was expired, with a sprinkling of hoat cinders thrown in for good measure. This fish was an abuse of her taste buds and would likely cause pains all the way through her digestive system, if it could even handle it.

So of course she goes for seconds.

"Mm-mm!" Rose licks the taste off her lips, smacking them appreciatively. "I can honestly say I've never had anything like this. Good job."

[Morty]

[Kitchen]

Olvisin looks between the fish and Rose a few times, eyes flicking up and down in confusion.

"Really? Because I think I might have overdone it with the spices."

[Ironsmith]

[Kitchen]

"Oh, no question." Rose gasps, fanning her tongue between bites of fish. "But it's still not like anything I've ever had before... intentionally or not." She holds out the tray to Olvisin. "Go on, have some! A chef should enjoy some of her own creations."

[Morty]

[Kitchen]

Olvisin tries the fish and chews it for a while.

"I definitely overdid it with the spices. And the temperature. I'm impressed you could swallow it. This much goblin-made spice can't be pleasant for a human."

[Ironsmith]

[Kitchen]

"Iph nod." Rose replies through a mouthful of fish, stuffing her face despite the fish's awful taste. She swallows hard and grins at Olvisin, the sour spices of the fish seeming to almost sizzle on her teeth. "It's not." She repeats. "But that's part of the beauty of it, isn't it?" She cuts off another chunk of the fish and wraps it up to go, doing the same with the remainder for Olvisin and dunking the pan into the sink. "...Ooooh and I think it's doing something else. Unless the roof was always pink."

...

She's still eating it.

[Morty]

[Kitchen]

Olvisin blinks. It's a long blink, that goblins seem to share with cats, whom they resemble in a few ways.

"It wasn't. Maybe you should sit down for a moment. I've never heard of this happening, though..."

[Hope for Babies]

After talking through the details at home, Sophie and Trick return to Astrana's office for their appointment. Today is the day.

[Ironsmith]

[Kitchen]

Siana hobbles over as Rose sits down, popping the last of the fish into her mouth and chewing contendedly. She doesn't respond, but continues to stare at the ceiling with a dopey grin on her face.

"Um... what exactly was in that fish?" Siana asks Olvisin worriedly.

[Halae]

[Hope for Babies]

Trick knocks on the door, her tail swishing back and forth nervously. As much as they talked over, emotions don't respond well to logic and she's still a bit worried. Despite that, she's willing to go for it, so now's the time.

[Morty]

[Kitchen]

"The fish is just a fish. I'm pretty sure humans eat them too. Now the spices..." Olvisin scratches her ear. "There was a bunch of dried seaweed and some lichen that grows in seaside caves. Roots, too. And I think... yeah, herbs."

[Ironsmith]

[Kitchen]

"Any chance one of those herbs might have been something that's not quite safe for human consumption?" Siana asks. "I know we've got a few in here, since we have so many non-humans to feed, goblins in particular..."

"I can see through time!" Rose whispers delightedly.

"...I mean, between that, and how much spice you apparently used..." The strigoi looks at Rose worriedly.

[Morty]

[Kitchen]

Olvisin steps from one foot to the other uncertainly.

"I mean... maybe? I'm not sure what humans can or can't eat. And she was excited to try goblin food. We might have got carried away. Let's take her somewhere she can lie down and sleep it off. We should be able to lead her. I think."

[Ironsmith]

[Kitchen]

"...Okay. You're the one with medical training." Siana says, shuffling on her good foot nervously. "Get her wherever it is you think she should go. I'd help, but I still have kitchen duties, and, ah..." She raps her cane against the floor, reminding Olvisin of her disability.

[Morty]

[Kitchen]

Where should she bring Rose? Treating humans who got high off goblin spices isn't something she's had to do before. The infirmary, probably. This way they can do something if this takes a turn for the worse.

"Right. Come on, Rose. Let's find you somewhere to lie down." She'll try to pull on Rose's arm to bring her along.

[Ironsmith]

[Kitchen => Hallway]

Rose nods and follows Olvisin out of the room, still surprisingly steady on her feet even with as loopy as she is. She gives Siana a dazed little wave as she and Olvisin leave the kitchen, much to the young strigoi's concerned confusion.

"If it helps, I feel really good right now." Rose says, practically skipping after Olvisin. "Not like weird good, but, like, night of passionate romance good." She snickers as she realizes what this sounds like. "Nono, not like that. I mean like you have a date and the guy's just perfect in every way and you just end up having a good time without even really needing to think about it. That makes sense, right?"

[Morty]

[Hallway]

"I... suppose it does." Her date with Chidi went very well and she remembers that it felt good. "Hopefully that's all it leads to. I had no idea any of those spices would make you... floaty like that. Maybe it's best not to spread it around or people will start taking them on purpose."

[Ironsmith]

[Hallway]

"Don't think you could cook for that many, huh?" Rose quips, giving Olvisin a lighthearted punch in the arm... or at least, she tries to. Her aim's a little off, owing to the fact that she has three Olvisins to pick from and got the wrong one. "Don't worry about it. I keep secrets professionally. What's one more innocent little factoid, right?" She grins. "Besides, we still don't know which one gave me a case of the happy, now, do we? Kinda hard to spread information you don't have."