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  1. - Top - End - #151
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Dire Moose's Avatar

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    Default Re: The "Rolled a 1" Game III - I Don't Want to Set This Thread on Fire

    You laugh your head off instead and die of decapitation.

    I roll to play guitar.
    LGBTitp

  2. - Top - End - #152
    Ettin in the Playground
     
    Dr.Gunsforhands's Avatar

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    Default Re: The "Rolled a 1" Game III - I Don't Want to Set This Thread on Fire

    You get played by a guitar. It stole your wallet!

    I roll to draw an original character.
    Avatar by the Ninja Chocobo.

  3. - Top - End - #153
    Pixie in the Playground
     
    georger0171's Avatar

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    Post Re: The "Rolled a 1" Game III - I Don't Want to Set This Thread on Fire

    You end up stabbing yourself in the brain with a pencil, and your ghost hears lawyers planning to sue your corpse for copyright infringement.

    I roll to commit eat tortilla chip vertically.
    get dunked on lol

    Epic avatar by linkele

    Currently DMing: Curse of (super sexy) Strahd


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    If you are reading this, then you have some serious dedication.

  4. - Top - End - #154
    Orc in the Playground
     
    Imp

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    Default Re: The "Rolled a 1" Game III - I Don't Want to Set This Thread on Fire

    Somehow you now have a tortilla nose ring. And you picked a lime-flavored tortilla.

    I roll to insert this thread into the vending machine with the help of TPBM.
    This is a boring signature.
    EXPLOSIVE RUNES
    EXPLODED RUNES
    PICTURE OF A CAT
    EXPLOSIVE RUNES

  5. - Top - End - #155
    Pixie in the Playground
     
    georger0171's Avatar

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    Post Re: The "Rolled a 1" Game III - I Don't Want to Set This Thread on Fire

    You insert this thread into your nose.

    I roll to pull the thread out of Korith's nose.
    get dunked on lol

    Epic avatar by linkele

    Currently DMing: Curse of (super sexy) Strahd


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    If you are reading this, then you have some serious dedication.

  6. - Top - End - #156
    Pixie in the Playground
    Join Date
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    Default Re: The "Rolled a 1" Game III - I Don't Want to Set This Thread on Fire

    You pull a tooth out of his mouth.

    I roll to give korinth a dental implant to replace it.

  7. - Top - End - #157
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Dire Moose's Avatar

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    Default Re: The "Rolled a 1" Game III - I Don't Want to Set This Thread on Fire

    You give him a Borg implant instead. It assimilates him. He then assimilates you.

    I roll to win the game.
    LGBTitp

  8. - Top - End - #158
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Ironsmith's Avatar

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    Default Re: The "Rolled a 1" Game III - I Don't Want to Set This Thread on Fire

    You just lost the game!

    I roll to revive dead memes.
    Who're you? ...Don't matter.

    Want some rye? 'Course ya do!


    Here's to us.
    Who's like us?
    Damn few,
    and they're aaall dead.


    *gushes unintelligibly over our cat, Sunshine*

    [Nexus characters, grouped by setting:
    Ouroboros: here
    Maesda: here
    Others: here
    ]

  9. - Top - End - #159
    Pixie in the Playground
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    Default Re: The "Rolled a 1" Game III - I Don't Want to Set This Thread on Fire

    Lawyers follow your twitter account with prejudice and send takedown notices to every dead meme post you try to retweet.

    I roll a str(Intimidation) check to forcefully convince the DM that intimidation should use your strength and not your charisma.

  10. - Top - End - #160
    Ettin in the Playground
     
    Dr.Gunsforhands's Avatar

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    Default Re: The "Rolled a 1" Game III - I Don't Want to Set This Thread on Fire

    She rules that causal paradoxes are busted and aren't allowed in her campaign.

    I roll to fix a mysterious hole in reality.
    Avatar by the Ninja Chocobo.

  11. - Top - End - #161
    Pixie in the Playground
     
    georger0171's Avatar

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    Post Re: The "Rolled a 1" Game III - I Don't Want to Set This Thread on Fire

    You cause the Big Crunch, the Big Rip, and the Big Freeze to happen all at once.

    I roll to post a meme.
    get dunked on lol

    Epic avatar by linkele

    Currently DMing: Curse of (super sexy) Strahd


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    If you are reading this, then you have some serious dedication.

  12. - Top - End - #162
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    Book Wombat's Avatar

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    Default Re: The "Rolled a 1" Game III - I Don't Want to Set This Thread on Fire

    You instead post a boring ten page long history essay.

    I roll to hack into all the major countries' databases.
    Every day...

    Avatar by linklele!
    Discord: bookwhyrm, feel free to DM.

    Book Wombat's Extended Signature

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    -. --- - / -- ..- -.-. .... / .... . .-. .

  13. - Top - End - #163
    Ettin in the Playground
     
    Dr.Gunsforhands's Avatar

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    Default Re: The "Rolled a 1" Game III - I Don't Want to Set This Thread on Fire

    ...all of them? That sounds like a lot of work for the GM. It's easier to say you just get in trouble with whichever one can hurt you the most.

    I roll to turn off the internet.
    Avatar by the Ninja Chocobo.

  14. - Top - End - #164
    Pixie in the Playground
     
    georger0171's Avatar

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    Post Re: The "Rolled a 1" Game III - I Don't Want to Set This Thread on Fire

    You create an NK-class "Grey Goo" scenario.

    I roll to contain the nanobots.
    get dunked on lol

    Epic avatar by linkele

    Currently DMing: Curse of (super sexy) Strahd


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    If you are reading this, then you have some serious dedication.

  15. - Top - End - #165
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Dire Moose's Avatar

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    Default Re: The "Rolled a 1" Game III - I Don't Want to Set This Thread on Fire

    You try to eat the nanobots. They use the opportunity to take over your brain, effectively turning you into a Borg drone.

    I roll to shoot the Borg before it assimilates me.
    LGBTitp

  16. - Top - End - #166
    Ettin in the Playground
     
    Dr.Gunsforhands's Avatar

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    Default Re: The "Rolled a 1" Game III - I Don't Want to Set This Thread on Fire

    It assimilates you, then you shoot yourself and die. No one is happy with this.

    I roll to bake a cake for a tiger.
    Avatar by the Ninja Chocobo.

  17. - Top - End - #167
    Orc in the Playground
     
    Planetar

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    Default Re: The "Rolled a 1" Game III - I Don't Want to Set This Thread on Fire

    You accidentally bake the tiger into the cake, which otherwise turns out fantastic. It starts a new craze for baking endangered species.

    I roll to capitalize on this new market.

  18. - Top - End - #168
    Pixie in the Playground
     
    georger0171's Avatar

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    Post Re: The "Rolled a 1" Game III - I Don't Want to Set This Thread on Fire

    You accidentally turn the world into a communist agrarian society.

    I roll to become the Exalted Holy God-Emperor of the Multiverse.
    get dunked on lol

    Epic avatar by linkele

    Currently DMing: Curse of (super sexy) Strahd


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    If you are reading this, then you have some serious dedication.

  19. - Top - End - #169
    Orc in the Playground
     
    Imp

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    Default Re: The "Rolled a 1" Game III - I Don't Want to Set This Thread on Fire

    You become the Exalted Holy God-Emperor of the Teenyverse, which is a universe in a universe in Rick's car battery.

    I roll to speed up Rick and Morty season 5.
    This is a boring signature.
    EXPLOSIVE RUNES
    EXPLODED RUNES
    PICTURE OF A CAT
    EXPLOSIVE RUNES

  20. - Top - End - #170
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Dire Moose's Avatar

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    Default Re: The "Rolled a 1" Game III - I Don't Want to Set This Thread on Fire

    You accidentally set fire to the production studios.

    I roll to stop setting things on fire.
    Last edited by Dire Moose; 2021-02-09 at 04:01 PM.
    LGBTitp

  21. - Top - End - #171
    Ettin in the Playground
     
    Dr.Gunsforhands's Avatar

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    Default Re: The "Rolled a 1" Game III - I Don't Want to Set This Thread on Fire

    They were always burnin' since the world's been turnin'.

    I roll to fall asleep.
    Avatar by the Ninja Chocobo.

  22. - Top - End - #172
    Orc in the Playground
     
    Imp

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    Default Re: The "Rolled a 1" Game III - I Don't Want to Set This Thread on Fire

    You lay there, your thoughts wandering about as so many droplets befall a rainforest in a year. Sleep teases you from some distant horizon which eternally eludes your grasp. Eventually you decide to just turn on the TV and watch a marathon of infomercials from the 1970s until once again day breaks, and you haven't slept a wink.

    I roll Perform (Bagpipes) to welcome the new day.
    This is a boring signature.
    EXPLOSIVE RUNES
    EXPLODED RUNES
    PICTURE OF A CAT
    EXPLOSIVE RUNES

  23. - Top - End - #173
    Ogre in the Playground
     
    Asmotherion's Avatar

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    Default Re: The "Rolled a 1" Game III - I Don't Want to Set This Thread on Fire

    Quote Originally Posted by Korith View Post
    You lay there, your thoughts wandering about as so many droplets befall a rainforest in a year. Sleep teases you from some distant horizon which eternally eludes your grasp. Eventually you decide to just turn on the TV and watch a marathon of infomercials from the 1970s until once again day breaks, and you haven't slept a wink.

    I roll Perform (Bagpipes) to welcome the new day.
    You play what sounds like a Truck Horn, which causes a major accident just outside your house, and a car ends up in your kitchen. And, no, insurance won't cover the damages.

    I Roll to make a cup of coffee.

    Please visit and review my System.
    Generalist Sorcerer

  24. - Top - End - #174
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Dire Moose's Avatar

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    Default Re: The "Rolled a 1" Game III - I Don't Want to Set This Thread on Fire

    You make a cup of superheated plasma and don’t realize this until your entire digestive system has been seared to a crisp.

    I roll to fix the warp engines.
    LGBTitp

  25. - Top - End - #175
    Pixie in the Playground
     
    georger0171's Avatar

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    Post Re: The "Rolled a 1" Game III - I Don't Want to Set This Thread on Fire

    You create a rip in the space-time continuum.

    I roll to eat the universe.
    get dunked on lol

    Epic avatar by linkele

    Currently DMing: Curse of (super sexy) Strahd


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    If you are reading this, then you have some serious dedication.

  26. - Top - End - #176
    Pixie in the Playground
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    Default Re: The "Rolled a 1" Game III - I Don't Want to Set This Thread on Fire

    Quote Originally Posted by georger0171 View Post
    You create a rip in the space-time continuum.

    I roll to eat the universe.
    As you reach through the multiversal rift in order to consume the universe inside, you realize your hand isn't large enough so you go for the earth instead. As you reach out, you feel a large shadow covering your back. You look upward to see your own hand, outstretched over the entirety of the earth. You grab it, and panic breaks out worldwide.
    You begin to pull the earth out from the rift, and you feel yourself shifting as you pull the earth away. As your hand crosses the threshold out of the rift, the earth exits the universe it is in and enters the larger one. This happens infinitely. You broke reality.

    I roll to reboot the simulation.
    Last edited by Trondor; 2021-02-11 at 08:54 PM. Reason: whoops, redundancy.

  27. - Top - End - #177
    Pixie in the Playground
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    Default Re: The "Rolled a 1" Game III - I Don't Want to Set This Thread on Fire

    You enter the task manager to try to kill the universe simulator. A popup appears and says "This operation could not be completed. Access is denied." And you can't turn off or restart the computer because it became sentient and learned to power itself.

    I roll to destroy this computer to end the simulation.

  28. - Top - End - #178
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Dire Moose's Avatar

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    Default Re: The "Rolled a 1" Game III - I Don't Want to Set This Thread on Fire

    “I can’t let you do that, Dave.”

    With that, the computer blows you out an airlock.

    I roll to kill SCP-682.
    LGBTitp

  29. - Top - End - #179
    Ettin in the Playground
     
    Dr.Gunsforhands's Avatar

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    Default Re: The "Rolled a 1" Game III - I Don't Want to Set This Thread on Fire

    It wakes up and destroys the world. Don't feel too bad; this would have happened eventually even if you'd rolled a 20.

    I roll to build a new planet to live on.
    Avatar by the Ninja Chocobo.

  30. - Top - End - #180
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Ironsmith's Avatar

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    Default Re: The "Rolled a 1" Game III - I Don't Want to Set This Thread on Fire

    *black hole'd*

    I roll to be a superhero.
    Who're you? ...Don't matter.

    Want some rye? 'Course ya do!


    Here's to us.
    Who's like us?
    Damn few,
    and they're aaall dead.


    *gushes unintelligibly over our cat, Sunshine*

    [Nexus characters, grouped by setting:
    Ouroboros: here
    Maesda: here
    Others: here
    ]

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