Skyside 7: The Big Pizza in the Sky

[Deathkeeper]

Cloudtops

Hopefully Mina’s new watch is waterproof. Mina has never gotten soaked in her new shape with clothes on (she bathes of course!). She finds this new experience unpleasant.
She’d also rather not die today. She runs to the door and rams the key into the hole, turning it and trying to get in before she gets struck down.

[Reinholdt]

[Black Abyss Body Shop]

That look Rose is giving is powerful. Thank the Empress that Rose looked away first cause Raven was not going to be able to hold eye contact when faced with such raw primal desire.

"I-I don't... I m-mean, I do! Of course I understand, after all, it's only the natural response one should have to my presence. Oh-ho..ho... C-clearly." For such a natural response, Raven sure has never encountered it before. And most certainly has no idea what to do with it. What to do with Rose.

"A-anyways, there will be plenty of opportunities for such things in the future as we break the populace and force them to kneel. So let's focus on the here and now. These corpses won't modify themselves," Raven suggests, throwing herself back into her work to fight back the impending blush on her cheeks and confused feelings she has about the situation in general.

[Ironsmith]

Cloudtops

Hopefully Mina’s new watch is waterproof. Mina has never gotten soaked in her new shape with clothes on (she bathes of course!). She finds this new experience unpleasant.
She’d also rather not die today. She runs to the door and rams the key into the hole, turning it and trying to get in before she gets struck down.

[Cloudtops -> Mina's Manor]

The door admits Mina readily, perhaps a little too much so, slipping out of the way and depositing her on the plush red carpet this place has in lieu of a welcome mat.

The front entry hall is much larger than it would appear to be from the outside, decorated mostly with statues similar to the ones outside. Paradoxically, some of them depict the smaller of the figures mid-leap, resulting in stonework that was itself suspended in the air through some manner of magic.

The wind and rain howl behind Mina as the door slams and locks itself, shutting out the storm.

[Black Abyss Body Shop]

That look Rose is giving is powerful. Thank the Empress that Rose looked away first cause Raven was not going to be able to hold eye contact when faced with such raw primal desire.

"I-I don't... I m-mean, I do! Of course I understand, after all, it's only the natural response one should have to my presence. Oh-ho..ho... C-clearly." For such a natural response, Raven sure has never encountered it before. And most certainly has no idea what to do with it. What to do with Rose.

"A-anyways, there will be plenty of opportunities for such things in the future as we break the populace and force them to kneel. So let's focus on the here and now. These corpses won't modify themselves," Raven suggests, throwing herself back into her work to fight back the impending blush on her cheeks and confused feelings she has about the situation in general.

[Black Abyss Body Shop]

Rose smirks just a little as she slips her surgical mask back on. That was just too easy. Short-circuiting any objections Raven had by acting aroused was child's play, or at least it would be if that weren't extremely age-inappropriate.

Still. At some point, that was probably going to stop working. Likely because Raven would either get used to it or eventually end up ticked off enough that "ooh that swamps my canoe" wasn't going to be much of a distraction. Possibly some combination of both. To be safe, she should make sure there's no lasting resentment from this encounter.

"Of course they won't." Rose says, holding down the corpse to make Raven's next incision easier. "That'd be too convenient. I mean, if just anyone could have an army of mecha-zombies at their back whenever, everyone probably would." She tilts her head and lets out an unabashed giggle. "Another in a long list of Empress Raven Ebondark's merits." Nothing Raven herself hadn't said, but it would probably be listed as evidence that Rose was both listening to her and agreed wholeheartedly.

"So... how'd you learn to do this?" She asks. "I mean, back on our first date, you said Jimmy was an early model, but I don't think he was really the first." If nothing else, Raven would need to have done experiments before then to confirm the technology worked, right? "And I don't think I've ever really seen anything quite like... well, Sarah here." She adds, after chancing a quick look at the inside of the corpse's collar. "So... my guess is you came up with this yourself, right?"

[Deathkeeper]

Mina's Manor

And so a sopping wet cow-person is deposited onto the foyer. By all accounts she owns this place which is extremely strange. Mina's first order of business is to get dry and find dry clothes, and so after recovering she attempts to look around. She doesn't seem to find anyone else around? So she should probably go looking for a bathroom which would have towels...

[Ironsmith]

[Mina's Manor]

And an absurdly large bath, apparently. One that was already filled. If Mina cared to check the temperature, she'd find it to be exactly as hot as she wanted; no more, no less. The floor of the circular basin in question is covered in tilework, depicting a hurricane as seen from above, with the storm's eye occupied by the (currently closed) drain.

The cabinet nearby is stocked with all the products Mina would typically use while bathing, as well as a few she wouldn't (but might consider if she could afford them), all locked behind a set of double glass doors. And of course, there's a rack of fluffy white towels at the far end of the room, neatly folded.

[Deathkeeper]

Mina's Manor

Mina sighs, not questioning it at this point. Place is magic or has a mind-reading attendant, sure. She undresses and uses the bath so lovingly laid out. Which, unless things get weirder, will be a mostly uneventful but luxurious time taken. And also probably involves a full clean session as this place surely isn't as cheap with the shampoo as Mina is at home.
Assuming she can open those glass doors. Her key works on that lock, right? Otherwise she's going to look pretty stupid sopping wet, undressed, trying to open her shampoo cabinet.

[Ironsmith]

[Mina's Manor]

Unfortunately, the key doesn't work on the cabinet; it's simply too large. Plus the locking system looks to be something a little more modern than the key Mina carries was ever designed for.

Fortunately, the cabinet clicks open when Mina makes an attempt anyway. Likely another result of that magic or mind-reading attendant or whatever.

At around this same time, the bathroom door will open to admit a frail-looking, hunched-over minotaur, dressed in a loosely-fitting set of tunic and trousers, with a thick cloth belt wrapped around his waist. His face looks something like someone took the features of an elderly oriental man and tried to transpose them onto a cow; his eyes have deep bags under them, giving him a perpetually-tired expression, his steel-grey beard is long and thin, reaching down to his waist, and he has a short, inward-curving mustache done in the same style. His horns have both long since broken off, likely in some youthful indiscretion, and have been replaced by a pair of lacquered wooden prosthetics. He walks with a noticeable limp, leaning against a split-topped cane for balance.

He doesn't seem to have noticed Mina, or is respectfully averting his gaze if he has. Instead, he's making his way over to the towel rack, carrying another towel over his arm.

[Deathkeeper]

Mina's Manor

Mina freezes up as some guy just barges into her bathroom while she's in it. She almost goes for the towels but they're all the way on the other side of this ludicrously large bathroom so instead she simply takes a few steps to the side and slips into the pool pretending to be a bathtub so she can angrily glare at the intruder.
"Um, hello? You could knock before you barge into someone's bathroom." she scowls.

[Ironsmith]

[Mina's Manor]

Thunder rumbles dangerously outside as the old man drops his cane, hands going into a ready stance, lightning crackling between his fingertips. "Who's there?" He rasps, his gaze flicking around the bathroom. It goes past Mina several times as he looks around, but he doesn't react as though she's there. Instead, he takes a step toward the tub and sniffs at the air, trying to pick up the scent of this mysterious intruder.

[Deathkeeper]

Mina’s Manor

Oh, he’s blind? That explains some things. You’d have to be pretty hard of hearing to not have heard her enter, though.
”Um, it’s Mina. I live here, apparently?
Say, do you know my friend Sai? Old, inconsiderate, electrical. You remind me of him.” she says with an entirely straight face.

[Ironsmith]

[Mina's Manor]

The old man lets out an astonished gasp. "...Mina? Mina, it's you?" He lets out a short, barking laugh as his hands go to his chest. "Ah-ha-ha! Mina! My gods, it's been a hundred years if it's been a day! Where are you, girl?" He's still looking around for her, more overjoyed than wary now, but of course, he still can't see her.

[Deathkeeper]

Mina's Manor

Mina blinks. "Oh [censored] it actually is you.
Um. One second let me get a towel." Mina slips out of the bath and wraps herself in an extra-large towel to properly put a hand on his shoulder.
"It has most certainly been a day. Are you...okay?"
He does not look okay. He looks his age, which is not good.

[Ironsmith]

[Mina's Manor]

Sai smiles warmly and shakily pats Mina's shoulder, now that she's close enough to be more than an indistinct cream-colored blob. "Maybe it was a day for you. But for me, another lifetime has gone by." He gestures to the mansion around them. "I ended up here, on this rock, nearly a hundred years ago today, with this body... or rather, a much younger version of this body." He gives a rueful smile. "I wasn't sure what had happened at first, so I asked around about this place. It was apparently the waste from some 'anomaly' that occurred here around that time, but thankfully, not dangerous... just annoying. I eventually found an oracle who told me to, and I quote, 'build a dwelling where I woke, for my mistress to one day rest'. I chose to believe she meant a house and not a tomb." Sai gives a little sigh. "So I got a job as a gardener, bought this rock for next to nothing, and spent these years building it up into the manor you see now."

[Deathkeeper]

Mina's Manor

Mina gently pulls him into a hug. She's somewhat relieved that he's at least been allowed to live a full long life without her instead of being zapped into an old man, but it still feels like a horrifically cruel thing to do.
"Oh Sai, you've done enough waiting for me. I'll make this up to you, I promise.
Um. How'd you get this much money working as a gardener though?" she asks.

[Ironsmith]

[Mina's Manor]

"What are you- oh." Sai grunts as Mina hugs him, struggling a little at first as he has no idea what to make of it, before deciding "you know what? This is nice." and hugging her back, giving her a feeble pat on the back. In her haste to hug him, though, Mina might have missed exactly where she was putting his head, given the height difference.

"You don't owe me anything." Sai smiles. "Though if you really must know, I was able to save quite a bit, thanks to a few blessings left to me. I still don't need to eat, drink, or sleep, so I had plenty of time on my hands. And I was able to channel my powers into the house itself, so it doesn't rely on anyone else for electricity or clean water. My wages added up quickly. Over the past hundred years, I've gone out and brought back [about $3 million]; more than enough to build this place and hide some away for you when you got back."

[Deathkeeper]

Mina's Manor

Mina blinks, looking around.
"Wait, really? I would have expected this place cost a lot more. Like, too big to comprehend. You must be really good at financing.
And I do owe you something. You waited three millennia for me and now you got made mortal and spent that whole life waiting for me again? You at least deserve more time to you know, actually know me. At least you're doing pretty well for your age." Considering he presumably wasn't sent back as an infant, he's looking pretty good for someone at least 105.

[Ironsmith]

[Mina's Manor]

The legally-blind, emaciated, hunched-over elderly minotaur gives an amused little chuff at being told he looks good for his age. Mina was right in the sense that he was still alive at a hundred and twenty, but the implication that he was at all healthy was clearly unwarranted. "Not to worry." Sai gives Mina a wrinkled little smile. "You'll have plenty of time with me yet. I don't intend to shuffle off this mortal coil any time soon."

[Deathkeeper]

Mina's Manor

"Well, you might do better if you actually ate something. I know you don't have to but I think I can see your ribs." Mina gently pokes him in the chest.
"And if I find anything that's good for eyesight or something I'll save it for you. I will make this up to you. I know how much you were looking forward to beating up demons with me over all those centuries." Really even if he was still his entirely brash, foul-mouthed self she'd consider this cruel to inflict on him. Surely she can find someone who can give someone a decode or two of life back? Sai seemed pretty happy being a sapient weapon. She'd never want to be it, but taking away what was essentially immortality is kind of screwed up if he liked what he was.

[Reinholdt]

[Black Abyss Body Shop]

"Hmm, yeah. You're right." Everyone would have Mecha-zombies if they could have Mecha-zombies. Fortunately none of them are as talented and as amazing as Raven Ebondark.

"Oh the first? The first was Scott Kinkle. He was the most handsome, sweetest boy our senior year. And he had the biggest biceps that could easily lift and pin two hundred pounds," Raven sighs a little, a sweet sound contrasting terribly with the gruesomeness of her work. "And he asked me to Prom and it was the bestest day ever. But then MOTHER had to go and ruin everything again. I caught her one day on the couch, her tongue down Scott's throat and his pants down to his knees. She seduced him, that poor innocent fool. He was doubly unfortunate, when he died in a horseback riding accident that weekend."

Raven's movements get tense with anger for a while, but it fades and she brightens up quickly. "Well I wasn't going to let that be the last word, so I fixed Scott up and we went to prom together anyways. He... got a little wild with the other students, I know, but it was the earliest model after all. A little spilled blood was to be expected. Still, it was amazing Prom and we really, really enjoyed ourselves. I think I actually preferred how he was while he was dead. Yeah, it was sad when I had to put him down later for some more efficient boys, but you know..."

"You never forget your first."

Raven closes up the stitches and moves on to the next corpse. "Before that there weren't any others. I wish I could take all the credit, but truthfully much of the technology is modified from my father's original designs. He's a pretty famous cyberneticist, but lacks any vision on the proper use of his tech. It didn't take much to change it into something useful. I had been playing with the tech my whole life so..." Raven shrugs a little, like it's no big deal.

[Ironsmith]

Mina's Manor

"Well, you might do better if you actually ate something. I know you don't have to but I think I can see your ribs." Mina gently pokes him in the chest.
"And if I find anything that's good for eyesight or something I'll save it for you. I will make this up to you. I know how much you were looking forward to beating up demons with me over all those centuries." Really even if he was still his entirely brash, foul-mouthed self she'd consider this cruel to inflict on him. Surely she can find someone who can give someone a decode or two of life back? Sai seemed pretty happy being a sapient weapon. She'd never want to be it, but taking away what was essentially immortality is kind of screwed up if he liked what he was.

[Mina's Manor]

Sai smiles and teasingly pokes her in the chest back. "Worried about the weight you've put on in my absence, then?" He chortles. "I think I can still get a few good blows in. Most of Skyside has learned to leave 'old man Sai' to his business if he's found in the less savoury parts of town. Including a few demons, naturally. Why don't you worry about keeping up with me?"

[Black Abyss Body Shop]

"Hmm, yeah. You're right." Everyone would have Mecha-zombies if they could have Mecha-zombies. Fortunately none of them are as talented and as amazing as Raven Ebondark.

"Oh the first? The first was Scott Kinkle. He was the most handsome, sweetest boy our senior year. And he had the biggest biceps that could easily lift and pin two hundred pounds," Raven sighs a little, a sweet sound contrasting terribly with the gruesomeness of her work. "And he asked me to Prom and it was the bestest day ever. But then MOTHER had to go and ruin everything again. I caught her one day on the couch, her tongue down Scott's throat and his pants down to his knees. She seduced him, that poor innocent fool. He was doubly unfortunate, when he died in a horseback riding accident that weekend."

Raven's movements get tense with anger for a while, but it fades and she brightens up quickly. "Well I wasn't going to let that be the last word, so I fixed Scott up and we went to prom together anyways. He... got a little wild with the other students, I know, but it was the earliest model after all. A little spilled blood was to be expected. Still, it was amazing Prom and we really, really enjoyed ourselves. I think I actually preferred how he was while he was dead. Yeah, it was sad when I had to put him down later for some more efficient boys, but you know..."

"You never forget your first."

Raven closes up the stitches and moves on to the next corpse. "Before that there weren't any others. I wish I could take all the credit, but truthfully much of the technology is modified from my father's original designs. He's a pretty famous cyberneticist, but lacks any vision on the proper use of his tech. It didn't take much to change it into something useful. I had been playing with the tech my whole life so..." Raven shrugs a little, like it's no big deal.

[Black Abyss Body Shop]

"...Your mom seduced a high schooler?!" Rose's face contorts in disgust again, and whatever primal look was in her eyes hurriedly vacated the premises. "That... that's just sick and wrong." She says, while tossing a set of disembodied intestines into the junk pile. She seemed a little lukewarm on Raven's parents before, but that brought out a whole new set of negative emotions in her.

Though she also starts considering the possibility that Raven might simply be lying. That story sounded awfully similar to the yarn she'd woven about Jimmy on their first date, right down to her choice of words. It was almost like she was reading off the results of one of those mad-lib stories. Not to mention the conspicuous detail of her being asked to the prom twice and bringing a mecha-zombie both times. Presumably, the school would ban her after one such incident. And then there was Raven herself; she's horribly uncomfortable in intimate situations, and this whole thing sounded like an elaborate fantasy of some sort. And finally, that turn of phrase, "you never forget your first", reminded Rose that she did make that claim about Jimmy. They couldn't both be her "first", right?

Then it hits her that, no, it's still entirely possible that both stories are true. Raven's father called her second date a "sub-intelligent Neanderthal", which might well describe the boy who thought "hey, you know that girl who brought Frankenstein to the prom last year, I think I'll ask her out". And if he had any influence, he might have been able to shield Raven from the consequences of her first prom. It was also possible he was responsible for both deaths, if neither Raven herself nor her mother were. And Rose represents a new experience of sorts for Raven; she might very well be more comfortable around boys than girls, or even just everyone else than Rose, specifically. Also, if her parents really were that bad, that they would just casually murder two high school boys because reasons, it would certainly explain a few things about how Raven came to be Raven. And Jimmy and Scott might have reached different "first" milestones that Raven- ew. She tries not to think too hard about that part.

She decides to shelve that internal debate for now. Rose shakes her head and resumes her assistance in installing parts into... she checks the collar... Gerald. Right now, the smart move is to continue playing the role of supportive girlfriend.

"That's awful, that that happened to you twice." Rose replies, a twinge of sympathy in her voice. "Some parents. I can see why you don't want them to be compared to anyone else. They sound like just the worst." And if she was telling the truth, they absolutely would be. "...Hold on. A famous cyberneticist? I've only heard of a few here in the Nexus..."

[Deathkeeper]

Mina's Manor

Mina flushes, slapping Sai's hand down.
"Sai, even if you looked twenty you wouldn't get to do that. It's also been about three hours so we both know I'm the same weight." she says indignantly, turning away.

[Ironsmith]

[Mina's Manor]

"Now, now. My memory may not be what it used to be, and this was a hundred years ago besides, but I distinctly remember you having a wider set of hips than bust last time we were together." Sai smiles, in a way that's not in the least bit lecherous; he's just stating an observation, no oggling or gawking involved. "Somehow, you did manage to... oh."

[Deathkeeper]

Mina's Manor

"Oh what?" Mina demands, turning her head so she can look down at herself. Stupid muzzle. She knows he can't be being literal because that would just be silly. Though not being in a towel at the moment probably isn't helping this situation.

[Ironsmith]

[Mina's Manor]

"Nothing, nothing!" Sai replies defensively, stepping back from her. Clearly he'd offended her, again. At least he was too big to fit in a garbage bag this time. "W-why don't you go ahead and get dressed, and I'll show you around." He adds hastily, to draw attention away from Mina's chest.

[Deathkeeper]

Mina's Manor

"My clothes are sopping wet. Do you have anything that might fit me? And considering you got thrown into a mortal body I would like to know if you think I look different. We still don't even really know what happened." Mina says, trying to soften her voice. Sai probably means well. He's just...still him. Age seems to have rounded off some of his edges, but only a little.

[Ironsmith]

[Mina's Manor]

Sai blinks and leans in, looking Mina over with the sort of intense scrutiny only an extremely nearsighted man trying to find small details can manage. If he manages to get through that without the naked minotauress reprimanding him, he'll make his way over to the towel rack and reach into it, pulling out a folded-over brown bathrobe. "I didn't have your measurements..." He begins. "So I couldn't do much for your wardrobe. But I was able to sew this together for you." Sai smiles. "Go ahead. Try it on."

[Deathkeeper]

Mina's Manor

Sai is allowed to look since Mina told him to. And she has a towel so she's not naked! Entirely.
"Aw, look at you, learning skills with your real meat hands. I'm almost proud of you. I'm surprised you didn't make it fancier given your sense of décor." she teases him.
She thinks all the minotaur statues are a little gaudy but hey he got a mansion from being a GARDENER somehow so she's not going to judge for going all out.

[Reinholdt]

[Black Abyss Body Shop]

"Right?! But she just said anything goes once they hit eighteen." Raven grimaces and barely keeps herself from gagging. Mother was absolutely terrible. Even if that sketchy idea were true, Scott was still supposedly going out with Raven and pulling him out from under her was just rude.

Raven ends up kinda shrugging in the end. "I mean you've probably heard of him. He's- waitaminute. Twice?" Raven looks confused for a moment before drawing her own conclusions.

"Are you saying you've slept with my mom?! Are you ******* serious?!! Why? When? I mean... how is that even?!" Raven trembles with uncertain rage, not sure who to be more mad at.

[Ironsmith]

Mina's Manor

Sai is allowed to look since Mina told him to. And she has a towel so she's not naked! Entirely.
"Aw, look at you, learning skills with your real meat hands. I'm almost proud of you. I'm surprised you didn't make it fancier given your sense of décor." she teases him.
She thinks all the minotaur statues are a little gaudy but hey he got a mansion from being a GARDENER somehow so she's not going to judge for going all out.

[Mina's Manor]

"This is just the one I made for practice." Sai shrugs. "The one up in your room, that's fancy." And also pretty tacky, though thankfully she wouldn't see it for a while. "I've picked up a lot of skills over the past hundred years. Carpentry. Masonry. Plumbing. A little smithing, but mostly metal casting. Landscaping, of course. Sculpting. Painting. Almost anything that would help here or keep busy. You know what they say about idle hands." He snorts, amused.

[Black Abyss Body Shop]

"Right?! But she just said anything goes once they hit eighteen." Raven grimaces and barely keeps herself from gagging. Mother was absolutely terrible. Even if that sketchy idea were true, Scott was still supposedly going out with Raven and pulling him out from under her was just rude.

Raven ends up kinda shrugging in the end. "I mean you've probably heard of him. He's- waitaminute. Twice?" Raven looks confused for a moment before drawing her own conclusions.

"Are you saying you've slept with my mom?! Are you ******* serious?!! Why? When? I mean... how is that even?!" Raven trembles with uncertain rage, not sure who to be more mad at.

[Black Abyss Body Shop]

"What? No!" Rose protests, before she stops to consider it. "I mean... it's a vague possibility. I guess if she has access to a sufficiently good minotaur or tiefling costume, maybe. But I'm going with 'no'." She shakes her head. "In any case, what I meant is that Scott died a lot like Jimmy did. Having your boyfriend die tragically just before prom is an awful thing to have happen once, but twice..." She nervously chews on the side if her finger, before she remembers that she's wearing gloves covered in bits of people and hastily spitting the taste out of her mouth. Ewwwww.

Raven had been awfully quick to come to that conclusion. Her mom must sleep with her friends a lot. Both sexes, apparently. No wonder Raven seemed so lonely; it'd be difficult for anyone to maintain a social circle composed of names from their mother's little black book.

It also lent a little more credence to the idea that she made the whole thing up. The parallels Rose was talking about were obvious; the only way Raven hadn't seen them would be if she wasn't nearly as invested in the story as she claimed to be. Which of course she wouldn't, if it were just a story.

"...I'm really just sorry that happened." Rose says finally. "...And if I ever do meet your mom, she's going to get stonewalled. I'm not going to let her ruin us for you."

[Deathkeeper]

Mina's Manor

Well, Mina is happy to have a robe to wear either way.
"Sounds like you've been busy, yeah. So, how's it been, having limbs? You been doing okay, being mortal and animate?" she asks, clearly testing the waters to see if he's positive or negative on not being an inanimate object anymore.