A Monster for Every Season: Summer 2
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  1. - Top - End - #91
    Ettin in the Playground
     
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    Default Re: LGBTAIitp Part 60: Still Going Strong

    Quote Originally Posted by SerTabris View Post
    No, that's not what I meant, but I think you're parsing this differently. I meant that your (or anyone else's) internal conception about how sex/gender/etc. shouldn't be imposed on others, and each individual has to be taken as the authority on referring to themselves. So, it sounds like you're agreeing but phrasing the idea in another way.
    I was just about to edit my last post to say exactly that
    Looking for feedback on Heart of Darkness, a character driven RPG of Gothic fantasy.

  2. - Top - End - #92
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    Default Re: LGBTAIitp Part 60: Still Going Strong

    Is it okay that I'm both ace and volcel? Every time "Ace week" happens, I see a ton of people posting "asexuality is different from celibacy" and "it's okay to want sex but still label yourself ace" and basically nobody saying "it's okay to not want sex at all."

    How bad of a person am I because I fit an offensive stereotype perfectly?
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    Wow.
    That took a very sudden turn for the dark.

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    I wish it was possible to upvote here.

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  3. - Top - End - #93
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    Default Re: LGBTAIitp Part 60: Still Going Strong

    I'd say people are just saying that because it's contrary to the assumption. You can be ace and sex positive, sex negative, or sex indifferent (yo!), as well as being romantically still gay (yo again), bi or any other sexuality under the sun.

    It's just that "people choose to be asexual" and "asexuals never want to have sex" are assumptions made, so there's not much need to assert them.

    EDIT: I should emphasise that I have indeed seen positivity posts along the lines of "it's fine to want to be single", for what it's worth

    Speaking of twitter, I'm chuffed to see Cis with the T trending, after everything that's happened the last few days (which I'd assume isn't an acceptable topic to discuss).
    Last edited by BisectedBrioche; 2021-10-27 at 07:06 AM.
    Hi, I'm back, I guess. ^_^
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  4. - Top - End - #94
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    Default Re: LGBTAIitp Part 60: Still Going Strong

    You're not a bad person at all! There are lots of ace people who are sex repulsed or just sex indifferent, so you are certainly not alone. Also, not all stereotypes are inherently offensive and they often exist for a reason (and "ace people don't like sex" is one of them). Sometimes people can go too far in trying to make clear that not everyone who is part of a community fits a certain stereotype, making the people who *do* fit that stereotype feel alienated. (Other examples of this I've seen this are "Not all gay men are flamboyant" and "not all bi people are promiscuous!" being said so often that the gay men and bi people who are flamboyant/promiscuous feel like they're doing something wrong/harming their community when that isn't the case at all).
    You can call me Juniper. Please use gender-neutral pronouns (ze/hir (preferred) or they/them) when referring to me.

    "We all are vessels of our brokenness, we carry it inside us like water, careful not to spill. And what is wholeness if not brokenness encompassed in acceptance, the warmth of its power a shield against those who would hurt us?" - R. Lemberg, Geometries of Belonging

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  5. - Top - End - #95
    Ettin in the Playground
     
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    Default Re: LGBTAIitp Part 60: Still Going Strong

    Just swinging through to say hello and remind everyone that they're super awesome.
    I stream RPG sessions, campaign preparation, and world-building via my Twitch Channel and upload them to my Youtube Channel.

  6. - Top - End - #96
    Ettin in the Playground
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    Default Re: LGBTAIitp Part 60: Still Going Strong

    So, I don't know how many people here still read Rain, but this week's pages introduced (IMO) the biggest plot twist in the comic's 11 year history. It was foreshadowed many times years in advance, but it still completely shocked me, and I didn't see any commenters on ComicFury who predicted it.

  7. - Top - End - #97
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    Default Re: LGBTAIitp Part 60: Still Going Strong

    I didn't see it coming, and I binge reread Rain every time there is a Rain Delay.

    I mean, dayum.

    Co-Founder of LUTAS.
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  8. - Top - End - #98
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    Default Re: LGBTAIitp Part 60: Still Going Strong

    We are coming up on the holidays, and I want to once again remind everyone that you are important, you are special, and you are loved.

    And if you feel like none of that applies to you, PM me, and I will reaffirm it for you.

    You are loved.

    You are special.

    You are deserving.

    You are amazing.

    You are awesome.

    Co-Founder of LUTAS.
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    A novella about a wizard and a rock star, cross-dimensional travel, and healing wounds neither knew were there.

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  9. - Top - End - #99
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    Default Re: LGBTAIitp Part 60: Still Going Strong

    Quote Originally Posted by Lentrax View Post
    We are coming up on the holidays, and I want to once again remind everyone that you are important, you are special, and you are loved.

    And if you feel like none of that applies to you, PM me, and I will reaffirm it for you.

    You are loved.

    You are special.

    You are deserving.

    You are amazing.

    You are awesome.
    Great post and oh so true. So often we fall victim to the negative voices in our own heads even. It is good for you to remind us with these words what is true.

    Well done.
    *It isn't realism, it's verisimilitude... seeming to be true within the context of the game world.

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  10. - Top - End - #100
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    Default Re: LGBTAIitp Part 60: Still Going Strong

    Good news everyone!

    I have received an email from GRS Montreal. Within the next few weeks I'll be getting a call to arrange for my bottom surgery date!


    Back to normal Zodi avatars for awhile.
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  11. - Top - End - #101
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    Default Re: LGBTAIitp Part 60: Still Going Strong

    That's fantastic! I hope it goes smoothly.

    I'm more or less recovered from mine back in March, but I was told to be careful for at least a year.
    Hi, I'm back, I guess. ^_^
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  12. - Top - End - #102
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    Default Re: LGBTAIitp Part 60: Still Going Strong

    Quote Originally Posted by BisectedBrioche View Post
    That's fantastic! I hope it goes smoothly.

    I'm more or less recovered from mine back in March, but I was told to be careful for at least a year.
    Thanks.

    I'll be honest, I'm terrified. I read the information booklet they gave me and had a bit of an anxiety attack. I'm just... nervous.


    Back to normal Zodi avatars for awhile.
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  13. - Top - End - #103
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    Default Re: LGBTAIitp Part 60: Still Going Strong

    Quote Originally Posted by LaZodiac View Post
    Thanks.

    I'll be honest, I'm terrified. I read the information booklet they gave me and had a bit of an anxiety attack. I'm just... nervous.
    I calmed myself down by remembering that all I need to do is show up, and then I get to sleep through it!

    The first few days in hospital were pretty rough (all liquid diet, plus I discovered that my digestive system does NOT like painkillers), but after the bandages are off and you're mobile again, it's all plain sailing.
    Last edited by BisectedBrioche; 2021-11-30 at 10:05 PM.
    Hi, I'm back, I guess. ^_^
    I cosplay and stream LPs of single player games on Twitch! Mon, Wed & Fri; currently playing: Paper Mario (Mon/Wed) and Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney 3: Trials and Tribulations (Fri)

  14. - Top - End - #104
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    Default Re: LGBTAIitp Part 60: Still Going Strong

    Surgery should be scary, it's a big deal, but the rewards outweigh the pain and recovery, hang in there!

  15. - Top - End - #105
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    Default Re: LGBTAIitp Part 60: Still Going Strong

    Quote Originally Posted by BisectedBrioche View Post
    I calmed myself down by remembering that all I need to do is show up, and then I get to sleep through it!

    The first few days in hospital were pretty rough (all liquid diet, plus I discovered that my digestive system does NOT like painkillers), but after the bandages are off and you're mobile again, it's all plain sailing.
    This is for bottom surgery, and I'm considering getting it with cavity, which requires a LOT of aftercare work, and that's what is making my nerves explode.


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  16. - Top - End - #106
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    Default Re: LGBTAIitp Part 60: Still Going Strong

    Quote Originally Posted by LaZodiac View Post
    This is for bottom surgery, and I'm considering getting it with cavity, which requires a LOT of aftercare work, and that's what is making my nerves explode.
    This is also what I'm talking about (fully vaginoplasty, with a cavity).

    While dilating 3 times a day is time consuming (until you're able to do it less), you'll find that after you're discharged (I was discharged after a week, which as far as I can tell is standard), it's mostly just a matter of taking it easy (and avoiding any heavy lifting, or straining yourself).
    Last edited by BisectedBrioche; 2021-12-01 at 07:27 AM.
    Hi, I'm back, I guess. ^_^
    I cosplay and stream LPs of single player games on Twitch! Mon, Wed & Fri; currently playing: Paper Mario (Mon/Wed) and Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney 3: Trials and Tribulations (Fri)

  17. - Top - End - #107
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    Default Re: LGBTAIitp Part 60: Still Going Strong

    Quote Originally Posted by Lissou View Post
    Surgery should be scary, it's a big deal, but the rewards outweigh the pain and recovery, hang in there!
    This, I'd be more worried if somebody had no trepidation.

    Not that I can really give anything more than well wishes, having no first or second hand experience here. But to bring them over from RB, good luck on the surgery Zodi!
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    Quote Originally Posted by Zelphas View Post
    So here I am, trapped in my laboratory, trying to create a Mechabeast that's powerful enough to take down the howling horde outside my door, but also won't join them once it realizes what I've done...twentieth time's the charm, right?
    Quote Originally Posted by Lord Raziere View Post
    How about a Jovian Uplift stuck in a Case morph? it makes so little sense.

  18. - Top - End - #108
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    Default Re: LGBTAIitp Part 60: Still Going Strong

    Quote Originally Posted by BisectedBrioche View Post
    This is also what I'm talking about (fully vaginoplasty, with a cavity).

    While dilating 3 times a day is time consuming (until you're able to do it less), you'll find that after you're discharged (I was discharged after a week, which as far as I can tell is standard), it's mostly just a matter of taking it easy (and avoiding any heavy lifting, or straining yourself).
    Fair, I'm just... scared. A part of me wants to go non-cavity because it'll be easier to take care of, but I'm worried about feeling "fake" or like a coward who chose this option for the wrong reason.

    Quote Originally Posted by Anonymouswizard View Post
    This, I'd be more worried if somebody had no trepidation.

    Not that I can really give anything more than well wishes, having no first or second hand experience here. But to bring them over from RB, good luck on the surgery Zodi!
    Thanks for the support.


    Back to normal Zodi avatars for awhile.
    Sig Banner by Pinkhaired August. No Regrets.

  19. - Top - End - #109
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    Default Re: LGBTAIitp Part 60: Still Going Strong

    Quote Originally Posted by LaZodiac View Post
    Fair, I'm just... scared. A part of me wants to go non-cavity because it'll be easier to take care of, but I'm worried about feeling "fake" or like a coward who chose this option for the wrong reason.



    Thanks for the support.
    That's understandable, but at the end of the day it's your body. All I can say is, anyone who has a problem with your choices in that respect can trip over while carrying heavy shopping in both hands.

    You've already done the bravest part getting this far.
    Hi, I'm back, I guess. ^_^
    I cosplay and stream LPs of single player games on Twitch! Mon, Wed & Fri; currently playing: Paper Mario (Mon/Wed) and Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney 3: Trials and Tribulations (Fri)

  20. - Top - End - #110
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    Default Re: LGBTAIitp Part 60: Still Going Strong

    Woo! That's super awesome! I'm actually recovering from a revision myself right now (going a bit rockier than expected but I think I'll be ok)

    Quote Originally Posted by BisectedBrioche View Post
    That's understandable, but at the end of the day it's your body. All I can say is, anyone who has a problem with your choices in that respect can trip over while carrying heavy shopping in both hands.

    You've already done the bravest part getting this far.
    Agree with this. It's definitely a big thing and being anxious is totally legit. I will also say that personally I find dilating to be a chore that's annoying but doable (tho granted, in my case I had 2 months off work and 1 month working from home before I went down to 2/day, which certainly makes it easier, and idk about what your situation will look like during recovery). You've got time to think about this so give yourself some room to breathe.

    If you wanna talk further/more privately then you're welcome to message me on discord.
    Quote Originally Posted by Dragonprime View Post
    Wouldn't a bulb only be sharp if someone broke it? Oh...wait...that's actually very fitting for this situation. Well played Ranger Mattos. Your metaphor-crafting is masterful indeed.

  21. - Top - End - #111
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    Default Re: LGBTAIitp Part 60: Still Going Strong

    Quote Originally Posted by BisectedBrioche View Post
    That's understandable, but at the end of the day it's your body. All I can say is, anyone who has a problem with your choices in that respect can trip over while carrying heavy shopping in both hands.

    You've already done the bravest part getting this far.
    Thank you. I've gotta keep that in mind.

    Quote Originally Posted by Ranger Mattos View Post
    Woo! That's super awesome! I'm actually recovering from a revision myself right now (going a bit rockier than expected but I think I'll be ok)

    Agree with this. It's definitely a big thing and being anxious is totally legit. I will also say that personally I find dilating to be a chore that's annoying but doable (tho granted, in my case I had 2 months off work and 1 month working from home before I went down to 2/day, which certainly makes it easier, and idk about what your situation will look like during recovery). You've got time to think about this so give yourself some room to breathe.

    If you wanna talk further/more privately then you're welcome to message me on discord.
    Will do, and good luck yourself!


    Back to normal Zodi avatars for awhile.
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  22. - Top - End - #112
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    Default Re: LGBTAIitp Part 60: Still Going Strong

    Quote Originally Posted by LaZodiac View Post
    Fair, I'm just... scared. A part of me wants to go non-cavity because it'll be easier to take care of, but I'm worried about feeling "fake" or like a coward who chose this option for the wrong reason.



    Thanks for the support.
    There is no one right way to transition. We all have things we are and arenít comfortable with and some things that are necessary, arenít necessary, and some things we never wanted to do in the first place. For example, I never had any kind of trans-related surgeries at all, just HRT and legal changes, and I am content with that at this point. That changes nothing about who I am and makes me no less of a woman than someone who has undergone all the surgeries in the world.

    You just need to figure out what works best for the results YOU want.
    Last edited by Dire Moose; 2021-12-06 at 03:25 AM.
    LGBTitp

  23. - Top - End - #113
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    Chimera

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    Default Re: LGBTAIitp Part 60: Still Going Strong

    I'd like to talk to someone about being Pansexual. I'm confused. I was bisexual, then gay, and now I just don't know, intellectually. I feel gay, does that make sense?
    I am ArlEammon. I've been here for 17 years, but I've lost access to my other account.

  24. - Top - End - #114
    Barbarian in the Playground
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    Default Re: LGBTAIitp Part 60: Still Going Strong

    Quote Originally Posted by DarthArminius View Post
    I'd like to talk to someone about being Pansexual. I'm confused. I was bisexual, then gay, and now I just don't know, intellectually. I feel gay, does that make sense?
    I am sure you will get some great advice from people much more qualified than I, but I want to say this:

    People are all different and the fact you do not feel comfortable fitting into someone else's labels is fine. Nothing wrong with you. You are thinking about and trying to find the path that best fits you. You do not need a hard label to do so. I have watched a few friends and two family members go through this and in each case once they stopped trying to force themselves into a pigeon hole box they felt better both about themselves and their lives.

    Labels might help with some conversations, but in the end you are not the label, you are a wonderful person and should be patient with yourself as you explore and find your path.

    Ok, I will go back to lurker mode.
    *It isn't realism, it's verisimilitude... seeming to be true within the context of the game world.

    "D&D does not have SECRET rules that can only be revealed by meticulous deconstruction of words and grammar. There is only the unclear rules prose that makes people think there are secret rules to be revealed."

    Consistency between games and tables is but the dream of a madman - Mastikator

  25. - Top - End - #115
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    Default Re: LGBTAIitp Part 60: Still Going Strong

    Quote Originally Posted by DarthArminius View Post
    I'd like to talk to someone about being Pansexual. I'm confused. I was bisexual, then gay, and now I just don't know, intellectually. I feel gay, does that make sense?
    Sexuality is not solid, and it might change with the times. But you don't have to fit into any label, while as humans we like to categorise none of the buckets cover the full nuance of sexuality.

    Maybe you'd be more comfortable with something like homoflexible rather than pansexual? Don't be afraid to associate with any identity, your sexuality is your sexuality and if you fit best in gay than you can be gay.
    Snazzy avatar (now back! ) by Honest Tiefling.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Zelphas View Post
    So here I am, trapped in my laboratory, trying to create a Mechabeast that's powerful enough to take down the howling horde outside my door, but also won't join them once it realizes what I've done...twentieth time's the charm, right?
    Quote Originally Posted by Lord Raziere View Post
    How about a Jovian Uplift stuck in a Case morph? it makes so little sense.

  26. - Top - End - #116
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    OrcBarbarianGirl

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    Default Re: LGBTAIitp Part 60: Still Going Strong

    Just chiming in to say how happy I am this thread exists! Feeling very welcomed.

  27. - Top - End - #117
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    Default Re: LGBTAIitp Part 60: Still Going Strong

    Quote Originally Posted by Quill View Post
    Just chiming in to say how happy I am this thread exists! Feeling very welcomed.
    All are welcome here!

    Glad to see you like the space. A little empty here of late, but we are still all around somewhere, ready to love, comfort and support in whatever types and amounts you need and are comfortable with.

    Co-Founder of LUTAS.
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    A novella about a wizard and a rock star, cross-dimensional travel, and healing wounds neither knew were there.

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  28. - Top - End - #118
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    Default Re: LGBTAIitp Part 60: Still Going Strong

    its been over two years since i last used this forum, but i'd feel awful if i browsed without saying hi to this thread. i definitely would not be where i am now without a place to talk about all the scary gender feelings i was having. but now im four years on hrt and thriving. (not really im very mentally unwell but that has nothing to do with gender)

    anyways just wanted to spread some cheer and happiness while i remembered this existed. wishing ny'all just the absolutely gayest year imaginable
    Thanks Uncle Festy for the wonderful Ashling Avatar
    I make music

  29. - Top - End - #119
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    Default Re: LGBTAIitp Part 60: Still Going Strong

    Iím still alive, and celebrating 5 years of being married to Mariah later this month. And I recently celebrated 4 years of HRT in November too.
    LGBTitp

  30. - Top - End - #120
    Ettin in the Playground
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    Default Re: LGBTAIitp Part 60: Still Going Strong

    Does anyone have recommendations for a queer-friendly TTRPG-focused Discord server?

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