A Monster for Every Season: Summer 2
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  1. - Top - End - #31
    Ogre in the Playground
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    Default Re: Find a use for the useless magic item above you

    In areas where alcohol is illegal, the customs agents use it to detect hidden contraband. The effect is obvious if their native language isn't commonly spoken here.

    Oven of the Wrathful Bread
    Any food baked in this oven roars when eaten and becomes painfully hot when chewed, inflicting a point of fire damage with each bite.
    Last edited by Bucky; 2021-04-12 at 11:45 PM.
    The gnomes once had many mines, but now they have gnome ore.

  2. - Top - End - #32
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    RedWizardGuy

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    Default Re: Find a use for the useless magic item above you

    It allows anyone with fire resistance to enjoy a hot meal on the road without a campfire, just get some bread baked in this wondrous oven and enjoy hot sandwiches on the go.

    Locket of Holding
    This incredible silver locket connects to a small extradimensional space capable of holding 50lb of material without affecting the weight of the locket, objects so stored are in no danger of falling out when the locket is open, requiring the wearer to deliberately reach in and remove them. The opening is the size of a copper piece and spells may not cross this boundary.

  3. - Top - End - #33
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Ironsmith's Avatar

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    Default Re: Find a use for the useless magic item above you

    Two words: snack compartment.

    Sash of Corpulence
    This cursed sash causes its wearer to rapidly gain weight in the form of body fat, at a rate of 10 lbs per day. This change is semi-permanent in nature, irreversible while the sash is worn and not reverting if the sash is removed (though it can be worked off when the sash's influence is gone).
    Who're you? ...Don't matter.

    Want some rye? 'Course ya do!


    Here's to us.
    Who's like us?
    Damn few,
    and they're aaall dead.


    *gushes unintelligibly over our cat, Sunshine*

    [Nexus characters, grouped by setting:
    Ouroboros: here
    Maesda: here
    ]

  4. - Top - End - #34
    Ogre in the Playground
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    Default Re: Find a use for the useless magic item above you

    Survive a famine situation.

    Boots of two left feet: These boots move by themselves... in all the wrong ways. Take a -5 magic penalty on any perform (dance) checks and reduce any Dex bonus to AC by 2. Once put on, you need either a Remove curse spell or to hold them in a fire until you take at least 10hp fire damage to remove them; in the latter case they jump off your feet and out of the fire by themselves, and appear undamaged.

  5. - Top - End - #35
    Troll in the Playground
     
    Dr.Gunsforhands's Avatar

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    Default Re: Find a use for the useless magic item above you

    I think this may cross the line between useless and deliberately cursed... oh! Wait! That name... it implies the existence of a sister pair. If we could only find the Boots of Two Right Feet and recombine them, then they will no doubt become extremely powerful!

    Next! +2 Chalice! (No description given. I think it gives +2 on... cup... checks?)
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  6. - Top - End - #36
    Pixie in the Playground
     
    BardGuy

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    Default Re: Find a use for the useless magic item above you

    Wardrobe malfunctions for female adventurers will be a thing of the past with the bonus to cup checks.

    Wand of warning: wand loudly alerts everyone nearby when the user is about to cast any spell.
    Being a mime means never having to say you're sorry.

  7. - Top - End - #37
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Ironsmith's Avatar

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    Default Re: Find a use for the useless magic item above you

    "Give me your money or I'll disintegrate you." "He'll freaking do it, man, this guy is not stable."

    Flex Goo
    This viscous fluid is totally indivisible; it will never, ever separate from itself, though it can be stretched, molded, or otherwise manipulated like putty. It has no other noteworthy properties.
    Last edited by Ironsmith; 2021-04-15 at 08:23 AM.

  8. - Top - End - #38
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    RedWizardGuy

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    Default Re: Find a use for the useless magic item above you

    Sounds like a magical children's toy to me, like playdough or that slime stuff, they can mold it and stretch it all they want, but it won't split up, so you never need to worry about them getting it stuck in your carpet or on your walls.

    Dust of Wetness
    When this strange powder makes contact with any amount of water it instantly transforms into water. This produces a volume of water equal to the volume of dust.

  9. - Top - End - #39
    Ogre in the Playground
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    Default Re: Find a use for the useless magic item above you

    Sounds like a reasonable children's toy, or a base substance for a hard-to-damage slime. Ninja'd

    Dust of Wetness sounds like a good way to have a hidden water supply for a fortified location, assuming it's plentiful. Also could be used before an electricity trap probably.

    Amulet of Channelling Dual Energies
    This amulet can channel either positive or negative energy. The trouble is, you can't predict which it does. Once per day you may activate the amulet, specify a target, and then you have a 50% chance to cast Cure Moderate Wounds as if you were a level 5 cleric, vs a 50% chance to cast Inflict Moderate Wounds as if you were a level 5 cleric.
    Last edited by paddyfool; 2021-04-15 at 09:47 AM.

  10. - Top - End - #40
    Ogre in the Playground
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    Default Re: Find a use for the useless magic item above you

    That's a 50% chance to instantly revive a teammate who's bleeding out. It's also a 50% chance to instantly kill them, but sometimes the alternative is to leave them to die.


    Boots of the Elocater
    These boots grant the ability to fly, but with an altitude limit of one foot. The surface underneath must be able to support the wearer or else they fall.
    Last edited by Bucky; 2021-04-15 at 11:17 AM. Reason: sp
    The gnomes once had many mines, but now they have gnome ore.

  11. - Top - End - #41
    Dwarf in the Playground
     
    ziproot's Avatar

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    Default Re: Find a use for the useless magic item above you

    Quote Originally Posted by Bucky View Post
    That's a 50% chance to instantly revive a teammate who's bleeding out. It's also a 50% chance to instantly kill them, but sometimes the alternative is to leave them to die.


    Boots of the Elocater
    These boots grant the ability to fly, but with an altitude limit of one foot. The surface underneath must be able to support the wearer or else they fall.
    This can let you get into the Dwarven lands. For a more serious answer, it can also let you go over traps activated by stepping on them or something similar.

    Wand of Random Teleportation
    This wand casts a teleport spell that takes you to a random location on your plane of existence. You must have enough space to fit there (so you can't teleport into a wall, for instance).

    EDIT: Fixed a typo.
    Last edited by ziproot; 2021-04-15 at 11:57 AM.
    My extended signature

    Quote Originally Posted by Peelee View Post
    Dictionary definitions never win debates, unless the topic up for debate is "what does the dictionary say about this"

  12. - Top - End - #42
    Pixie in the Playground
     
    BardGuy

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    Default Re: Find a use for the useless magic item above you

    This seems like it could be an actively good item to run in some groups that don't do PC deaths. An emergency GTFO button that has consequences in that the GM can put them where they want as a plot hook or as an additional quest to get back where they were. May lower dramatic tension knowing it's an option but if the players know PC deaths wouldn't be a thing anyway, it still works.

    Next: Boots of walking: These boots were made for walking. And that's all they do - no running, jumping or standing still.
    Being a mime means never having to say you're sorry.

  13. - Top - End - #43
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Ironsmith's Avatar

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    Default Re: Find a use for the useless magic item above you

    This basically doubles your overland speed, since these boots make you keep walking whenever you would sleep, so as long as you're pointed in the right direction when you nod off.

    Fafo's Walking Stick
    This brittle wooden pole breaks under nearly any pressure, but reassembles itself as soon as there is room. The splinters that result from this are dull and cannot penetrate the skin.
    Who're you? ...Don't matter.

    Want some rye? 'Course ya do!


    Here's to us.
    Who's like us?
    Damn few,
    and they're aaall dead.


    *gushes unintelligibly over our cat, Sunshine*

    [Nexus characters, grouped by setting:
    Ouroboros: here
    Maesda: here
    ]

  14. - Top - End - #44
    Pixie in the Playground
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    Default Re: Find a use for the useless magic item above you

    Open a shop and put it low on the shelf where kids can touch it. Decorate it with fools gold embroidery to make it look valuable. When someone drops it and it breaks, grab it so that it doesn't reassemble. Then point out that it's a rare and priceless antique and demand all the money in the customer's live savings.

    Fruit of the yellow tongue

    A fruit that looks and tastes like a peach. When eaten, it turns your tongue yellow permanently.

  15. - Top - End - #45
    Troll in the Playground
     
    Dr.Gunsforhands's Avatar

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    Default Re: Find a use for the useless magic item above you

    I mean, the obvious use that it would actually get is as a secret society's tattoo. The campaign probably gives it religious significance for the society that grows it. Also it's great in pie.

    Next! Frost Wilter / Heat Wilter

    These two artificial flowers are separate items with similar functions. One seems to wilt in temperatures below 0 degrees celsius. One seems to wilt in temperatures above 80 degrees celsius. It's a qualitative change; they don't seem to measure the temperature more finely than that.
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  16. - Top - End - #46
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Ironsmith's Avatar

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    Default Re: Find a use for the useless magic item above you

    Not much use in person, but you can mix them with teleportation and divination magic to determine the habitability of a place (where it's not immediately obvious).

    Rings of the Cabal
    While wearing a ring from this set, you and every other wearer are unable to perceive each other in any way. These rings have effect on those not wearing them.
    Who're you? ...Don't matter.

    Want some rye? 'Course ya do!


    Here's to us.
    Who's like us?
    Damn few,
    and they're aaall dead.


    *gushes unintelligibly over our cat, Sunshine*

    [Nexus characters, grouped by setting:
    Ouroboros: here
    Maesda: here
    ]

  17. - Top - End - #47
    Ogre in the Playground
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    Default Re: Find a use for the useless magic item above you

    The monstrous guards don't attack authorized visitors, and the authorized visitors don't even notice the monstrous guards. As a bonus, it protects the visitors' identities from each other. Please return the ring at the door on the way out.

    Hat of self-disguise
    This bowler hat gives +10 to Bluff checks to pass it off as a different hat, and +5 to Bluff checks to pass it off as a non-hat object.
    The gnomes once had many mines, but now they have gnome ore.

  18. - Top - End - #48
    Ogre in the Playground
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    Default Re: Find a use for the useless magic item above you

    Hat of self-disguise could be used in a bait and switch or similar con, e.g. to keep some valuable object out of the antagonists hands. ("So Lily the Lich thinks she has obtained the crown of Vecna, but actually she's just got a bowler hat... let's get far away from here before she finds out"). The hat-on-a-stick trick to check for snipers could also get a boost from it maybe. Or going with the crown disguise again, I'm sure there's mileage to be gained by roguish characters in impersonating a royal personage ("My crown has a glamour that allows me to make it look like a bowler hat in public"), or alternative authorities if, for instance, guard captains tend to have distinctive hats.

    Sword of babble
    As we all know, some enchanted swords can talk, but this one never stops blathering irritating nonsense continually whenever it's unsheathed. Besides that it's a regular sword.

  19. - Top - End - #49
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Ironsmith's Avatar

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    Deafen yourself and use this weapon as a distraction in combat. Or as an interrogation device.

    Hammer of Agony
    This warhammer has a 1% chance every round to slip from the wielder's hand and land on their big toe, inflicting one point of bludgeoning damage.
    Who're you? ...Don't matter.

    Want some rye? 'Course ya do!


    Here's to us.
    Who's like us?
    Damn few,
    and they're aaall dead.


    *gushes unintelligibly over our cat, Sunshine*

    [Nexus characters, grouped by setting:
    Ouroboros: here
    Maesda: here
    ]

  20. - Top - End - #50
    Halfling in the Playground
     
    Planetar

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    Default Re: Find a use for the useless magic item above you

    Quote Originally Posted by Ironsmith View Post
    Deafen yourself and use this weapon as a distraction in combat. Or as an interrogation device.

    Hammer of Agony
    This warhammer has a 1% chance every round to slip from the wielder's hand and land on their big toe, inflicting one point of bludgeoning damage.
    Use it as a warhammer. The Dmg you take, can be used to prolong your rage on occassion.

    42
    A board, which is written the number 42. The number occasionally changes to a random number with a focus on numbers within the first 100 numbers, though other numbers may be seen and no known upper limit exists. This change lasts a couple of seconds, and can take anywhere from a couple of seconds for another change, to the lifespan of the universe.

  21. - Top - End - #51
    Ogre in the Playground
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    Default Re: Find a use for the useless magic item above you

    The board is infamous for its key role in the Great Royal Street Address Prank of 447 and the following diplomatic incident.

    Wand of Summon Legs
    It functions as a Wand of Summon Monster, except that only the summons' legs and feet are visible and tangible. The summon has no sensation in the rest of its body, either, so it's blind, deaf etc.
    The gnomes once had many mines, but now they have gnome ore.

  22. - Top - End - #52
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Ironsmith's Avatar

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    Default Re: Find a use for the useless magic item above you

    If you ever find yourself in command of an army of Orcs and at risk of a breakdown in discipline over food rations, this wand can provide an alternative to maiming your Halfling prisoners.

    Unseeing Stone
    This glass sphere replicates the effects of a Clairvoyance spell once per day, except it always shows the least helpful angle possible (i.e. straight down at the floor).
    Who're you? ...Don't matter.

    Want some rye? 'Course ya do!


    Here's to us.
    Who's like us?
    Damn few,
    and they're aaall dead.


    *gushes unintelligibly over our cat, Sunshine*

    [Nexus characters, grouped by setting:
    Ouroboros: here
    Maesda: here
    ]

  23. - Top - End - #53
    Troll in the Playground
     
    Dr.Gunsforhands's Avatar

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    Good enough to target a teleport spell!

    Next: Fangs of the Nampire
    These prosthetic fangs are wearable in the mouth over one's regular teeth. While worn, the wearer can't be blocked by Carl spells counters. Once per day, one can speak a command word through the fangs to cause them and one's mouth to merge and grow to unusual size for 1 hour. The enlarged teeth are useless in combat, but can be used to gnaw on inanimate objects with no lasting damage to the fangs nor to the user's teeth.
    Last edited by Dr.Gunsforhands; 2021-04-26 at 12:17 PM.
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  24. - Top - End - #54
    Ogre in the Playground
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    Default Re: Find a use for the useless magic item above you

    Look, I'm not proud of it but sometimes there is no other way to get that jar open. And sometimes it's an easy way to dispose of evidence.

    Toothless Brush

    This appears to be a normal toothbrush, but any tooth brushed with it will immediately fall out of its owner's mouth 1d10 rounds after the brushing.
    Quote Originally Posted by 2D8HP View Post
    Work is the scourge of the gaming classes!
    Quote Originally Posted by Kish View Post
    Neither Evershifting List of Perfectly Prepared Spells nor Grounds to Howl at the DM If I Ever Lose is actually a wizard class feature.

  25. - Top - End - #55
    Halfling in the Playground
     
    Planetar

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    Default Re: Find a use for the useless magic item above you

    This is likely a good way to sunder a creature's bite attack to ensure they are more suitable to zoo, and containment during the first days of training. With a regeneration spell in the future for combat training proper.

    The First Move Chess-Game
    This chess game will whenever it's set up do a first move on both sides, then the animation ends until the pieces are set up once more.

  26. - Top - End - #56
    Ogre in the Playground
     
    lacco36's Avatar

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    Quote Originally Posted by totadileplayz View Post
    The First Move Chess-Game
    This chess game will whenever it's set up do a first move on both sides, then the animation ends until the pieces are set up once more.
    A great game starter for people that overthink their first move.

    Staff of Many Dramatic Effects

    This ornate staff has a small statuette of a dragon that sometimes moves on top and a small, crystal ball on the bottom. It is carved with ever-changing runes of ancient, indecypherable runes, changes color and the crystal ball often shows strange events.

    It can be used to produce swarms of butterflies, flies, prismatic effects, small, ominous black clouds (around the size of a small dog) that can be controlled. It can also provide small amounts of light, which changes color according to the mood and voice of the caster.

    Lastly, it provides a lightning and thunder effect (not actual lightning) whenever the wielder says something important (judged by the small dragon, so absolutely randomly).
    Call me Laco or Ladislav (if you need to be formal). Avatar comes from the talented linklele.
    Formerly GMing: Riddle of Steel: Soldiers of Fortune

    Quote Originally Posted by Kol Korran View Post
    Instead of having an adventure, from which a cool unexpected story may rise, you had a story, with an adventure built and designed to enable the story, but also ensure (or close to ensure) it happens.

  27. - Top - End - #57
    Ogre in the Playground
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    Default Re: Find a use for the useless magic item above you

    Could be used as a study aid for young illusionists or enchanters to puzzle out how it produces the wide range of effects it does.

    Could also be used to briefly impersonate a wizard while having no talent in that regard. Just as long as you don't talk.

    Wand of summon frightened critter
    This casts Summon Nature's Ally I, but the creature summoned immediately tries to run and/or hide, and will fight only if cornered.

  28. - Top - End - #58
    Ogre in the Playground
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    Default Re: Find a use for the useless magic item above you

    It's excellent bait for catching ambush predators. Or testing suspected pressure plates in a featureless hallway.

    Orcish Boxing Glove
    This "spiked" gauntlet is enchanted to not deal any damage. It uses an intricate set of buckles and thus requires 30 seconds to put on or remove.
    Last edited by Bucky; 2021-06-01 at 02:25 AM.
    The gnomes once had many mines, but now they have gnome ore.

  29. - Top - End - #59
    Troll in the Playground
     
    Dr.Gunsforhands's Avatar

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    Default Re: Find a use for the useless magic item above you

    That it doesn't deal damage at all, not even nonlethal, says to me that it's primarily designed for convincing stage combat. Orcs have a cultural affinity for brawling and don't appreciate human fight choreography; a swing doesn't carry any weight unless someone is physically struck. As the glove doesn't actually carry a dex penalty or anything, a thief who does not analyze it beyond a simple magic-detection spell may try using it for real only to be undone by the product of their avarice. On the other hand, a clever assassin could deduce the item's secret and switch it out for a deadly replica. Naturally, the bards that own the glove do little to prevent these popular plotlines from playing out.

    Next item: The Fire Stopper!
    This is a cork usable in standard wine bottles or potion flasks. When it is removed from such a container, the liquid inside ignites, shedding light as a simple lamp and consuming the contents at the same rate as lamp oil.
    Last edited by Dr.Gunsforhands; 2021-06-01 at 06:07 PM.
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  30. - Top - End - #60
    Halfling in the Playground
     
    Planetar

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    Default Re: Find a use for the useless magic item above you

    This is a great means to make bombs, while keeping the contents relatively safe, have a solid explosive in a soluble state in some form of liquid, and throw it at an enemy to cause the explosion. Alternatively, Water is abundant easily makeable by spells, and can be used to get more out of the create water cantrip, without needing another cantrip for light.

    The Paradox box
    When the box is opened you can read the top and bottom of the box. The Top says the bottom is lying, and the Bottom Says the Top is Telling the Truth. This registers as divination magic with the specific spell being detect truth. It is unknown which one was formed from the detect truth spell, if either.

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