Things I May No Longer Do While Playing 13: This Is A Banned List Not A Drinking Game

[Bohandas]

The Bene Gesserit is a secretive all-female organization of sorts in the Dune-verse. The concise description above is fairly accurate.

Plus they have a superpower for making people do whatever they demand, they all seem to be either middle or upper class, and they constantly use yoga jargon when they talk.

[Rater202]

There is no Exalted charm called Overwhelming Mary Sue Bull**** Enlightenment.

[Lord Raziere]

There is no Exalted charm called Overwhelming Mary Sue Bull**** Enlightenment.

* Not even if I make an Exigent of Mary Sues
** Mostly because I'd need to have a Goddess of Mary Sues to get it from.
*** I'd probably also be an illegal Exigent, the Unconquered Sun doesn't give sparks away for Mary Sue nonsense
**** My Mary Sue Exigent cannot have Adamant Circle Sorcery and Sidereal Martial Arts AND Void Circle Necromancy at Essence 1
***** The Bronze Faction WILL consider my Exigent a greater threat than the Solars and do anything to take me down
****** Especially if I start gathering a Dragon-Blooded lesbian polycule to try and make a bid for Empress

[Bohandas]

*None of the characters from Squidbillies ever lived in Innsmouth

*The "Ghost Eating Technique" used by the Exalted is not the same one used by Pac-Man

*House Phiarlan are not juggalos

*the Star of Chaos is not "a stylized drawing of a butt hole"

[Personification]

* Not even if I make an Exigent of Mary Sues
** Mostly because I'd need to have a Goddess of Mary Sues to get it from.
*** I'd probably also be an illegal Exigent, the Unconquered Sun doesn't give sparks away for Mary Sue nonsense
**** My Mary Sue Exigent cannot have Adamant Circle Sorcery and Sidereal Martial Arts AND Void Circle Necromancy at Essence 1
***** The Bronze Faction WILL consider my Exigent a greater threat than the Solars and do anything to take me down
****** Especially if I start gathering a Dragon-Blooded lesbian polycule to try and make a bid for Empress

*The backstory of my Exalted character cannot be that they are a Mary Sue who got planeshifted to a world populated by a large number of their own kind for "balance reasons"
**For several reasons, not the least of which is that it sounds like the plot of a mediocre webcomic...
***Or a likely much higher quality manga

[Lord Raziere]

*The backstory of my Exalted character cannot be that they are a Mary Sue who got planeshifted to a world populated by a large number of their own kind for "balance reasons"
**For several reasons, not the least of which is that it sounds like the plot of a mediocre webcomic...
***Or a likely much higher quality manga

**** This is not a weird form of Getimian Exaltation

* My Dragon-Blooded shikari may not be inspired by Menou from The Executioner and her Way of Life
** She does not have a Solar Anathema girlfriend and a bunch of tension surrounding their relationship

* My Changing Moon Lunar may not just be a transgender lesbian version of Marena of the Red Crescent
** May not make a Night Caste version of Secret her Solar Mate

* May not make a No Moon Lunar just to use lunar mutation charms to convert people into beefolk, snakefolk or any other kind of beastfolk

* There is no Exigents of the following: Sex, Lesbians, Time Travel, Takebacks, Breaking The Setting, Guns, Demons, Zen-Mu, The Brass Dancer, Ligier, squirrels, neomah, The Wyld, watermelons, or Unfinished Jokes

[Personification]

**** This is not a weird form of Getimian Exaltation

* My Dragon-Blooded shikari may not be inspired by Menou from The Executioner and her Way of Life
** She does not have a Solar Anathema girlfriend and a bunch of tension surrounding their relationship

* My Changing Moon Lunar may not just be a transgender lesbian version of Marena of the Red Crescent
** May not make a Night Caste version of Secret her Solar Mate

* May not make a No Moon Lunar just to use lunar mutation charms to convert people into beefolk, snakefolk or any other kind of beastfolk

* There is no Exigents of the following: Sex, Lesbians, Time Travel, Takebacks, Breaking The Setting, Guns, Demons, Zen-Mu, The Brass Dancer, Ligier, squirrels, neomah, The Wyld, watermelons, or Unfinished Jokes

...yet.ten

[Rater202]

The League of Extraordinary Floridamen is a concept that shall never see the light of day.

[Personification]

The League of Extraordinary Floridamen is a concept that shall never see the light of day.

But it's the sunshine state!

*Floridamen were not renamed Floridafolk in the latest edition.

[Rockphed]

The League of Extraordinary Floridamen is a concept that shall never see the light of day.

... this week in Exalted ...

* If overthrowing the evil overlord leads to massive inflation, social instability, and general lawlessness, "put him back in power" is not to be plan A.
** Plan A cannot be "find an eviler overlord to take his place" either.
*** Becoming his replacement is right out.

[Jervis]

... this week in Exalted ...

* If overthrowing the evil overlord leads to massive inflation, social instability, and general lawlessness, "put him back in power" is not to be plan A.
** Plan A cannot be "find an eviler overlord to take his place" either.
*** Becoming his replacement is right out.

Tarquin approved solutions are out then?

[Lord Raziere]

... this week in Exalted ...

* If overthrowing the evil overlord leads to massive inflation, social instability, and general lawlessness, "put him back in power" is not to be plan A.
** Plan A cannot be "find an eviler overlord to take his place" either.
*** Becoming his replacement is right out.

* Almost no problem can be solved with the words "embrace your inner Abyssal"
** or "Embrace the violence"
*** nothing good comes from "reaching heaven through violence"

* may not steal the form of a tax assessor just to go around to people demanding ridiculous sums of rice.
** May not point out that Fangs at The Gate says this is a viable Lunar strategy for fermenting rebellion

*My Black Claw Style teacher may not be any of the following: my mother, my sister, any teacher who educated me before age 18, my daughter, my talking pet, my master when I was a slave, my maid before I exalted as a Dragon-Blooded dynast, or anyone else of that nature.
** My Getimian may not get around the Black Claw teacher thing by having a teacher be from their Origin and thus doesn't exist.

[Personification]

... this week in Exalted ...

* If overthrowing the evil overlord leads to massive inflation, social instability, and general lawlessness, "put him back in power" is not to be plan A.
** Plan A cannot be "find an eviler overlord to take his place" either.
*** Becoming his replacement is right out.

This is just the plot of Mistborn

[Jervis]

* I may not describe Silvery Barbs as bombarding my opponent’s mind with cringy deviantart pictures
** Not even when it’s funny to do so
*** I may not post said deviantart pictures in the discord chad as reference

[Lord Raziere]

This is just the plot of Mistborn

* May not point out this is technically only 2/3rd's of the plot of Mistborn.

* The Children of Yatani are not the Getimian's or Rakan Thulio's plan to make a DB army to counter the Sidereal's one by bringing them in from a different version of Creation
** Nor are they the remnants of the Gunstar
*** or Dragon-Blooded people descended from a modern Earth
**** Nor are they from a world Gaia created after disappearing from Creation
***** they are not a lost First Age Dragon-Blooded colony returned
****** because their true origins are probably much more strange than any of those possibilities
******* The Children of Yatani are not an excuse to make whatever weird DB I want.

[Anonymouswizard]

* Solars are not 'prototype Nobilis'.

[Personification]

* May not point out this is technically only 2/3rd's of the plot of Mistborn.

I was actually considering specifying something along those lines, but I couldn't think of a way to make it not clunky.
In honor of Mr. Sanderson (spoilers for his stuff I guess):

*I may not make all of my plot twists revolve around a mysterious dead wife.
**Yes, for my sci-fi campaign I can have the plot twist be that the "Unkowable Things from Beyond the Stars" are actually a Pseudo-hivemind of ancient AIs
***The secondary plot twist may not be that all of the AIs are actually a digital copy of one guys dead wife.
****What do you mean "too late"?
*****No, the fact that the dimension made entirely out of the essence of dead wife turned evil because of dead husband does not make it better, that's just doubling down.

[Telok]

*I may not make all of my plot twists revolve around a mysterious dead wife.
**Yes, for my sci-fi campaign I can have the plot twist be that the "Unkowable Things from Beyond the Stars" are actually a Pseudo-hivemind of ancient AIs

* Not allowed to pull the "Harvey Mudd" thing ever again. No matter what.
** Definitely may not have the gem they trapped her ghost in come up for sale.

[Lord Raziere]

* My Dream-souled's Ideal may not be "Everyone should love each other as lesbians"
** or "Everything should become cute"
*** or "everything would be better if all people were catfolk"
**** may not reshape the world into memes

* May not play a Hearteater Exalted
** No not even if I limit my pawns to Fair folk or demons
*** My ever expanding mind control of all things is not just me showing my love
**** May not try to justify letting me live to the Sidereal by saying "just let me mind control the gods and I'll work with you to make things run smoothly up there"
***** or to the Dragon-Blooded "let me become the new Empress and all your civil war problems will be solved!"
****** Talking to the Autochthonians at all is right out
******* a little girl Hearteater mind controlling everyone into having tea parties with her is just a horror story in progress.

* My Umbral Exalted's Shadow is not just an excuse to have some Ichigo Kurosaki-esque hollow inside me
** The Shadow's Defining Intimacy may not be "Time for EDGE"
*** or "I'm the coolest"
**** or "Vengeance"
***** or "I'm the ultimate life form"
****** or "I must get my revenge on Itachi Uchiha"
******* or "Blood For Blood God"
******** or "The Ebon Dragon has a point"

[TeChameleon]

* If the only side-effect of gaining a Legendary Artifact for free is our airship suddenly sprouting a trans-dimensional attic, questioning it is unwise
** especially if another party member manages to gain a Faerie Dragon familiar from that same attic

[danielxcutter]

* My Dream-souled's Ideal may not be "Everyone should love each other as lesbians"
** or "Everything should become cute"
*** or "everything would be better if all people were catfolk"
**** may not reshape the world into memes

Hmm, depends, do I get to keep the plumbing down there?

Actually what’s a Dream-souled?

[Lord Raziere]

Hmm, depends, do I get to keep the plumbing down there?

Actually what’s a Dream-souled?

optionally canonical Exalted from the Exigents preview. Dream-souled are basically the exalted that replaces playable raksha in Ex3. they one of the Apocryphals- three Exalt types that could be canon, could not be. the other two are Umbrals and Hearteaters. the Dream-Souled do a lot of cool Wyld/Fae stuff. course they're charmsets aren't complete, intentionally so, so that people can homebrew them themselves, devs don't have time to make all the Exalt ideas possible.

* may not make an Umbral charm to make my eyes stronger by killing the person I love
** may not make an Umbral charm to defend against positive social influence titled "Too Good To Be True"
*** my charms to detect negative intimacies associated with cynicism and pessimism don't automatically let me find Sidereals
**** or politicians
***** or Guild merchants
****** or teenagers
******* may not make an Umbral charm to fire sith force lightning at people.

* may not use Dream-Souled charms to turn peoples houses into gingerbread ones to "solve world hunger"
** may not use Face-Changing Glamour to put silly illusory appearances on my enemies
*** using Waking Dream Ephemera just to be petty conwoman selling people things that disappear once the scene ends is distinctly lacking in imagination
**** my idealized form using Dream Champion's Trance may not take the form of a magical girl
***** Nor may it be going Super Saiyan
****** may not make Dream-Souled charms to defeat things using the power of friendship
******* or love
******** my Dream-Souled's Ideal may not be "Turn Creation into a world where the Power of Friendship/Love works".
********* making a charm to create magical ponies is right out.

[Tohron]

* Yes, the listed price for getting 1st level spells cast is 10 gp times the caster level. That does not mean I can pay 20,000 gp for a CL 2000 Skill Enhancement infusion.
** I may not Wish for an item with such an infusion active either.

[KorvinStarmast]

*May no longer trade my clothes for new ones (the tailor liked the cut of my foreign cloth) when it entails my dwarf just dropping his clothes on the floor and putting the new ones on since the tailor didn't have a changing room.
The other PCs advised my dwarf that being a bit more discreet in the future would be appreciated.
** May not encourage the paladin to adopt the turn of phrase "as hairy as a dwarf's backside"

[Bohandas]

*Slannesh's realm in the Immaterium is not to be described as "a combination of Hellraiser and Jackass"

[Rater202]

My Superhero costume cannot be a literal fursuit lined with kevlar and ballistic mesh.

[Anonymouswizard]

* I cannot bring an Eclipse Phase character into any crossover game.
** Especially one with science skills.

[danielxcutter]

*Slannesh's realm in the Immaterium is not to be described as "a combination of Hellraiser and Jackass"

I don’t know what Jackass is, but Hellraiser sounds fairly accurate for some parts of it.

[Telok]

I don’t know what Jackass is, but Hellraiser sounds fairly accurate for some parts of it.

I'm pretty sure there's a 24/7/365 speed/death metal concert going on everywhere at the same time too.

[Bohandas]

I don’t know what Jackass is

It's a movie and TV franchise that involves a bunch of stuntmen, all of whom are aging bros, doing pranks and stunts that all have some vulgar element to them and generally end up with people getting hit in the groin or covered in excrement or something like that.

And going back to my thing earlier, some of the stuff they do in Jackass could also be a Slannesh type thing, but the wackiness of it wouldn't really mix well with Slannesh as Hellraiser. Like imagine if instead of tearing you apart with spiked chains the cenobites jumped on your groin with a pogo stick, and that big rotating pillar that they nailed people's faces to was in the shape of a giant marital aid, and one of them showed up drunk when the box summoned them, and Pinhead's pins were all messed up and crooked because he put them in while riding in a dune buggy