Iron Chef E6 Appetizer Edition, Round XXXIX

[Zaq]

Welcome back to the Iron Chef Optimization Challenge E6 Appetizer Edition! We may be running low on traditional class-based ingredients here, but we won't benefit from not using them, so here we go with another one.

The form of this challenge is to take a particular D&D 3.5 game element (our "secret ingredient," or SI) and turn it into a functional E6 build, which must feature the SI as heavily as possible. (The only hard rule about this is that you must take at least one level—where applicable—in the SI, though judges are encouraged to look favorably on builds that take as many levels as possible in said SI or that otherwise use it as heavily as possible.) Your final build submission should consist of your 6 regular levels and your first 10 epic bonus feats, though providing a snapshot at earlier points through the progression is heartily encouraged. Entries are to be PM'd to the Chair (that would be me!), and they will be posted anonymously; our volunteer judges will then grade each build on a 1-5 point scale in four categories: Originality, Power, Elegance, and Use of the Secret Ingredient. The builds with the highest three scores will be awarded medals, with the Honorable Mention award going to the non-medaling build that the Chair likes best and/or that receives the most votes for HM in this thread. (HM may not always be awarded, particularly if the number of builds is very small.) And then we all have cake!*

*Note: You must provide your own cake.

This is basically like the regular Iron Chef, and let's be brutally honest with ourselves here: this isn't a gargantuan community, and we basically all know what we're talking about at this point. Make the builds, send 'em in, post some scores, and have fun. If you've got questions, lemme know. Still, let's lay out a few rules!

• Cooking Time: Builds must be submitted via PM to the Chair by 4:59 PM GMT - 9 on Monday, Aug 08, 2022 (1:59 AM GMT on Tuesday, Aug 09). The reveal shall be on the first evening the Chair has free following the cooking deadline, which is hoped to be that evening or the immediately subsequent one—I'll do my best, anyway. Judging is then encouraged to go as quickly as possible; if multiple judges volunteer, we'll set about a two-week window, but if we only get one judge, we'll try to wrap up as soon as possible after that judge presents scores. (I will admit that the deadline time may not be an exact science, but don't hide from me and we'll probably be cool.)
• Kitchen: Let's break this one down a bit.
  
  
  Spoiler: Let's talk about sources

  Show

  
  

  • ALLOWED: Almost all D&D 3.5 material published by WotC: Core, Completes, monster books, Races Of books, alternate power source books (Expanded Psionics Handbook, Magic of Incarnum, Tome of Battle, Tome of Magic, etc.), Spell Compendium, Book of Exalted Deeds, Book of Vile Darkness, Eberron material, Forgotten Realms material, and other WotC-published 3.5 material. (This list is NOT exhaustive and there are many other legal books that I did not mention by name!)
  • ALLOWED: Material from the 3.5 archives of the Wizards of the Coast website (including, but not limited to, the Mind's Eye articles). If you use it, link it.
  • ALLOWED: Official errata from WotC. If you're relying on this in a material fashion, it's a good idea to link it and to discuss it.
  • NOT ALLOWED: Unofficial errata, including "class fixes" (regardless of the source, including from the original author if not published in a WotC book) or fan-created content.
  • ALLOWED: Unupdated WotC-published 3.0 material (e.g., Sword and Fist, Masters of the Wild, etc.) except for 3.0 psionics. No 3.0 psionics allowed. If you are using 3.0 material, use the general-purpose skill updates (Wilderness Lore becomes Survival, Innuendo becomes Bluff, etc.) and the general-purpose rules updates (spells with a casting time of "1 action" become "1 standard action," etc.) when appropriate.
  • NOT ALLOWED: 3.0 material for which a direct 3.5 update exists. Use the updated material instead.
  • ALLOWED: Dragon Compendium and its errata.
  • NOT ALLOWED: Content from Dragon Magazine and/or Dungeon Magazine unless said content appears in an otherwise allowed source.
  • ALLOWED: Oriental Adventures, including the 3.5 update to Oriental Adventures from Dragon Magazine #318. This is a specific exception to the "no Dragon" rule!
  • NOT ALLOWED: Pathfinder content, regardless of whether it is "D&D 3.5 OGL" or not. If it didn't come from WotC, we don't want it.
  • ALLOWED: From Unearthed Arcana: racial paragon classes, alternate class features/variant classes, spelltouched feats, and variant races. (Traits and flaws are technically legal, but traits warrant a -0.5 point penalty in Elegance, and flaws warrant a -1 penalty in Elegance.)
  • NOT ALLOWED: Other Unearthed Arcana content, including (but not limited to) bloodlines, LA buyoff, fractional BAB/saves, alternate casting systems, alternate skill systems, item familiars, prestigious character classes, generic classes, gestalt, etc. When you're wondering if UA content is allowed, err on the side of caution and don't mess around with it.
  • NOT ALLOWED: Leadership, regardless of source. Game elements functionally equivalent to Leadership (including, but not limited to, Dragon Cohort, Undead Leadership, and Thrallherd) are similarly banned. (Familiars, Improved Familiar, animal companions, Wild Cohort, psicrystals, elemental envoys, and similar game elements are allowed, and they are not considered to be "Leadership." If the difference isn't obvious, feel free to contact the Chair with specific questions.)
  • NOT ALLOWED: Third-party content, homebrew, or other non-WotC content.
  • NOT ALLOWED: Epic feats from the Epic Level Handbook. Just because you're "epic" in E6 after 6th level doesn't mean that you're that kind of epic.
  • NOT ALLOWED: Any race or template with a level adjustment other than +0. (Or any other source of LA other than a race or template, if any such things exist.) However, as a specific exception for round 26, see below.
  • NOT ALLOWED: For our judges: penalizing solely based on legal sources used, regardless of whether those sources are plentiful, sparse, common, obscure, or something in between. If the material is legal, then it doesn't matter how many or how few books it came out of.
  • ALLOWED: Also for our judges: penalizing for using a source (other than material in Core; don't be vindictive about genuinely obvious stuff) that isn't listed in the build writeup. The chef may choose to present the sources in-line with the text, in a consolidated source list, or somewhere else, but if the source is listed (and is otherwise legal), it counts. If the source is not listed, you may choose to penalize for that.

  
  If you have questions about anything in this section (or hell, in this ruleset), feel free to ask the Chair.
  
• Character Creation: 32 point buy is assumed. For the purposes of this contest, Level Adjustment greater than +0 is banned. (This may be revised at a later point, but I don't feel that the E6 LA rules are conducive to fun in the context of this contest.) No more than two entries per chef per contest, please; if you submit two builds and somehow are so overcome with inspiration for a third that you can't help yourself, PM me and tell me which two you care about the most.
• Highlighted because of past issues: It is not enough for your build to end with a level adjustment of +0. You must be +0 from start to finish. No using ANY build elements with a level adjustment above +0, even if they then get mitigated or reduced somehow. However, note that a special exception is in place for round 26...
• Speculation: Please do not post any form of speculation before the reveal. Just don't do it, guys. It's not cool. This means NOT posting any of the following or anything substantially similar: what you think is going to be common, significant elements of your planned build or of other potential builds, or anything else that could directly influence someone else's build choices for good or for ill. (It's acceptable to ask for rules clarifications as appropriate, but try to avoid tipping your hand too much.) Speculation is bad because it can discourage people from posting builds and can also "taint the judging pool" when it comes to Originality, so please just try to be aware of how other people might react to your speculation.
• E6: Here's how E6 works for the purposes of this contest. Build your character normally for the first six levels. After you reach level 6, you stop gaining levels and start gaining bonus feats every time you would gain 5,000 XP. Since we aren't actually tracking XP, you'll basically list your first ten epic bonus feats in the order that you take them, and we think of them as being kind of like levels. We will not use the LA-equals-reduced-point-buy rules, instead preferring to just ban races with LA, at least for now. We will not use the "capstone feats"; all feats that you take must be normal legal 3.5 feats, not homebrew E6 ones. You may not use the Epic feats from the Epic Level Handbook, though if for some reason there are non-Epic feats from the ELH that you qualify for, you may take those. (I don't think there are any, but I'm sure someone will prove me wrong.) It is up to the discretion of each judge whether this is a "hard E6" (magic above 3rd level spells is simply beyond mortal reach, items that have a listed CL above 6th are just plain not available, etc.) or a "soft E6" (if you can somehow get the magic on your character, it's yours, regardless of level), though I honestly don't expect it to come up. Don't go crazy with making assumptions about items and we probably won't have to find out.
• Presentation: Please use the table found below in the spoiler. List your epic bonus feats (in clear order) after the table. If you find a clever way of formatting that that isn't annoying and that doesn't break anything, have fun; if it's portable, I may steal it for the next round. When sending your build or any disputes to the Chair, clearly include your build's name in the subject of the PM, and please present your build exactly as you want the Chair to copy and paste it into the thread.
  If you're using a picture, cite the source and follow any relevant citation rules. Because we have had issues with this in the past, when listing your skills, please make it very clear how many ranks you have at each level. There are multiple ways to do this and we do not wish to cramp anyone's individual style by dictating exactly how this must look, but make sure that somewhere in your entry there's an explanation of how many actual skill ranks you have. It's still fine to list total skill bonuses, if that's your style, but don't only list bonuses; make sure that there is a clear listing somewhere of your ranks alone. You are allowed, but not required, to use this extremely spiffy tool that mattie_p cooked up (thanks, mattie_p!).
  Spoiler

  Show

  Level	Class	Base Attack Bonus	Fort Save	Ref Save	Will Save	Skills	Feats	Class Features
  1st	New Class Level	+x	+x	+x	+x	Skills	Feats	New Class Abilities
  2nd	New Class Level	+x	+x	+x	+x	Skills	Feats	New Class Abilities
  3rd	New Class Level	+x	+x	+x	+x	Skills	Feats	New Class Abilities
  4th	New Class Level	+x	+x	+x	+x	Skills	Feats	New Class Abilities
  5th	New Class Level	+x	+x	+x	+x	Skills	Feats	New Class Abilities
  6th	New Class Level	+x	+x	+x	+x	Skills	Feats	New Class Abilities

  Code for the table:

  Spoiler

  Show

  [TABLE="class: head alt1 alt2"]
  [TR]
  [TH][B]Level[/B][/TH]
  [TH][B]Class[/B][/TH]
  [TH][B]Base Attack Bonus[/B][/TH]
  [TH][B]Fort Save[/B][/TH]
  [TH][B]Ref Save[/B][/TH]
  [TH][B]Will Save[/B][/TH]
  [TH][B]Skills[/B][/TH]
  [TH][B]Feats[/B][/TH]
  [TH][B]Class Features[/B][/TH]
  [/TR]
  [TR]
  [TD]1st[/TD]
  [TD]New Class Level[/TD]
  [TD]+x[/TD]
  [TD]+x[/TD]
  [TD]+x[/TD]
  [TD]+x[/TD]
  [TD]Skills[/TD]
  [TD]Feats[/TD]
  [TD]New Class Abilities[/TD]
  [/TR]
  [TR]
  [TD]2nd[/TD]
  [TD]New Class Level[/TD]
  [TD]+x[/TD]
  [TD]+x[/TD]
  [TD]+x[/TD]
  [TD]+x[/TD]
  [TD]Skills[/TD]
  [TD]Feats[/TD]
  [TD]New Class Abilities[/TD]
  [/TR]
  [TR]
  [TD]3rd[/TD]
  [TD]New Class Level[/TD]
  [TD]+x[/TD]
  [TD]+x[/TD]
  [TD]+x[/TD]
  [TD]+x[/TD]
  [TD]Skills[/TD]
  [TD]Feats[/TD]
  [TD]New Class Abilities[/TD]
  [/TR]
  [TR]
  [TD]4th[/TD]
  [TD]New Class Level[/TD]
  [TD]+x[/TD]
  [TD]+x[/TD]
  [TD]+x[/TD]
  [TD]+x[/TD]
  [TD]Skills[/TD]
  [TD]Feats[/TD]
  [TD]New Class Abilities[/TD]
  [/TR]
  [TR]
  [TD]5th[/TD]
  [TD]New Class Level[/TD]
  [TD]+x[/TD]
  [TD]+x[/TD]
  [TD]+x[/TD]
  [TD]+x[/TD]
  [TD]Skills[/TD]
  [TD]Feats[/TD]
  [TD]New Class Abilities[/TD]
  [/TR]
  [TR]
  [TD]6th[/TD]
  [TD]New Class Level[/TD]
  [TD]+x[/TD]
  [TD]+x[/TD]
  [TD]+x[/TD]
  [TD]+x[/TD]
  [TD]Skills[/TD]
  [TD]Feats[/TD]
  [TD]New Class Abilities[/TD]
  [/TR]
  [/TABLE]
• Contest houserules: Nearly the same as the main contest's rules here: all creatures are proficient with natural weapons they have or may acquire, bonus feats that are explicitly granted without meeting prereqs are usable even without those prereqs, and feats that affect which skills are class skills for you and/or how you spend your skill points (Able Learner, Martial Study, Truename Training, Apprentice, etc.) apply immediately at the level at which you take them (even though you normally spend skill points before taking a feat). When taking Open Minded as an epic feat, any skill that has ever been a class skill for you (including through your class, your race, your feats, or similar game elements, though please don't muck around with retroactively making something stop being a class skill for some stupid reason) is a class skill when determining how the 5 granted skill points may be spent. All usual rules about HD-related skill caps apply. When taking Open Minded as a non-epic feat, treat it as normal; the class skills of the class you took at the level you gained Open Minded (plus race, feats, etc.) are your class skills for those skill points, similar to if Open Minded's skill points came straight from your class.
• Judging guidelines: The minimum score in a category is 1, and the maximum is 5 (except in high-Originality rounds, wherein the maximum in Originality is 10). Judges are expected to be fair, consistent, and open-minded, and they are expected to make a good-faith effort to engage with any reasonable disputes that arise, especially when RAW is in question. That said, contestants are asked to not dispute more than necessary; let's do everything in good faith and really only dispute when a judge is being inconsistent, being unfair, or is otherwise grossly misinterpreting a build.
  Judges may not penalize Originality solely because a build is a tribute or homage to an existing creative work (in or out of D&D canon; note that this is not the same thing as penalizing Originality for using well-known optimization tactics), nor may judges penalize based solely on sources used (whether those sources are plentiful, sparse, common, obscure, or something in between, you should judge the build elements and how they work together rather than what book or what books they came out of, as long as those books are legal for this contest and are cited in the entry).
  As with the main contest, we will follow the "One Mistake, One Penalty" guideline, and it is very important that the judges adhere to it. I'm going to directly copy and paste this from the main thread, and hopefully the original author won't mind too much:
  
  Spoiler

  Show

  Judges are only allowed to penalise once for a given mistake. If someone messes up their skills and doesn't qualify for a PrC, ding them as hard as you like. Once. In one category. You don't then get to declare that because they didn't qualify for that PrC, they don't get those levels, and thus don't qualify for anything else. If Ranger is a common ingredient, ding them for Originality. Once. Don't also take off points for Two-Weapon-Fighting being a common ingredient.
  
  Non-exhaustive list of examples:
  
  Skills

  Allowed:
  

  • Giving a penalty for miscalculating the number of skill points gained
  • Giving a penalty for not having enough ranks to meet a prerequisite
  • Increasing the harshness of a skill miscalculation penalty if it affects critical skills including prereqs

  
  
  Not allowed:
  

  • Giving separate penalties for miscalculating skill points and for non-qualification where the non-qualification is solely caused by the miscalculation

  
  Prereqs

  Allowed:
  

  • Giving a penalty for not meeting prereqs
  • Scaling the penalty depending on how important the item that the build failed to qualify for is
  • Giving minimum score in UotSI for not qualifying for the SI
  • Not giving credit for (note: not the same as penalising for) tactics using feats or classes other than the SI that were not qualified for (but see below)

  
  
  Not Allowed:
  

  • "Cascading" failures to qualify - declaring that because a build doesn't qualify for a feat, for example, it also doesn't qualify for anything using that feat as a prereq
  • Treating a build as having fewer levels than it does because of FtQ for classes

  
  Other general things that are no longer allowed:
  

  • Penalising because someone has chosen to build a tribute to an existing creative work
  • Deciding that a backstory has not met a fluff prerequisite well enough, or because its method of meeting it is "unrealistic". You may penalise if a fluff prereq is not addressed at all, but not for how well it is addressed.

  
  
  Note that these are protections, not licenses. Deliberately taking a feat that you know you don't qualify for hoping to just suck up the judging penalty for a feat that you couldn't normally take is not okay, and may lead to your build being disqualified.
• Dispute guidelines (NEW, PLEASE PAY ATTENTION): Disputing is long, annoying, and emotional. It's also sometimes necessary, but it's often not actually something that makes everyone have more fun. Let's go into a little more detail here.
  
  Spoiler

  Show

  • Do NOT dispute to make an argument that goes fundamentally beyond what's in your write-up. It is the responsibility of the chef to make sure that the write-up is complete and contains their best arguments for what the build does and why it's awesome. If you didn't explain your tactics well or didn't spell out something that a judge misses, just do better next time. Don't drag it out after the fact.
  • Do NOT dispute just to be clever or witty or cheeky. Please. We're all adults here and so I assume you know what that means. Don't treat the build as a setup and your oh-so-clever dispute as the punchline. It's not as funny as it is in your head. Trust me. I've been down that road.
  • Do NOT dispute just to say "oh yeah, my bad, I missed that" or some equivalent. If you're not directly challenging the judge, save the commentary until after the reveal. I 100% get that the urge to respond to commentary is very strong, but type it out and sit on it for a while if you've gotta.
  • Do NOT dispute just to try to wheedle more points out of the judge. Note that this is different from saying that the judge is being truly unfair or is being truly wrong by black-and-white RAW. A dispute is NOT the place to try to scrape together a few last quarter-points. If you didn't put it in your write-up, that's on you. This also means that a dispute is really not the place to have long back-and-forth tit-for-tat arguments. That's a surefire way to get people grumpy. It's a contest on a D&D board, guys, not the results of a federal election.
  • Do NOT dispute to tear down another build. That's just plain not cool. If you entered the contest, it's not on you to judge the other builds.
  • DO dispute if the judge is being blatantly biased by giving you a substantially different ruling on a build element compared to another chef who used the same build element in nearly the same way. (Note that position in a build may affect if you're using that element in "nearly the same way" or not.) Please reserve this for the truly blatant examples. I mean it. Remember, it's the contestant's responsibility to make their best argument in the original write-up.
  • DO dispute if the judge is actively going against the contest rules. Note that there are relatively few ways in which a judge can go against contest rules (we intentionally give very wide discretion to our judges), but examples include truly breaking One Mistake One Penalty, penalizing just because of number of sources of (legal) material, and so on.
  • DO dispute if the judge is clearly ignoring unambiguous RAW. Note that this is for unambiguous RAW; if the RAW is shady and you're making an argument that isn't completely clear and that it wouldn't be strange for a GM to frown on, the judge has every right to frown on it as well. (You generally know when you're indulging in shady RAW. Be mature about this.) But if the judge is saying you didn't hit a prereq that you clearly did hit (and included in your write-up!), saying you can't do something that the plain text of the ability says you can do, or anything like that, by all means, call 'em out.
  • Do NOT dispute if the judge doesn't agree with your interpretation of ambiguous RAW. Yes, this is a retread of the previous bullet point; this is that important. If you're relying on ambiguous RAW, it's on you to lay out clearly why it should work the way you want it to work. Again, be mature and act in good faith: you really know when you're pushing things like this. If they don't like it, they don't like it. Move on.

  
  
  Disputing is a privilege, not a right. In the Chair's sole discretion, disputes that do not meet these guidelines and/or that do not seem to be offered in good faith may be suppressed. The Chair reserves the right to choose to post all, some, or none of a dispute if appropriate.
  
  
• Other bits and bobs: If there's something major and relevant I haven't mentioned, assume that the way I handle it will probably be the same as the main contest unless stated otherwise or unless doing so would be an obviously absurd result. If you've got questions, I'll give you answers.

This round's secret ingredient:
The BARD, from the PHB!



Allez Optimizer!

The Builds:

Name	Alignment / Race	Class Levels	Chef	loky1109	Total	Place
Brighid Smith	CG Sliverbrow Human	Bard 5/Warblade 1	Birchy	10.75	10.75	3rd
Corax	CE Kenku	Bardic Knack Mimicking Song Bard 6	MinimanMidget	16.75	16.75	1st
Namey Namesong	NG Bonesinger Spellscale	Loresong Dead Levels Bard 5/Ardent 1	daremetoidareyo	10.75	10.75	3rd(?)
Neil	NN Rat Hengeyokai	Bardic Knack Mimicking Song Dead Levels Bard 6	The Viscount	15.00	15.00	2nd

Spoiler: Contest History

Show

Round 4: Knight
Round 5: Ninja
Round 6: Racial Paragon Classes
Round 7: Hexblade
Round 8: Shugenja
Round 9: Swashbuckler
Round 10: Crusader
Round 11: Soulknife
Round 12: Factotum
Round 13: Prestige Classes
Round 14: Mountebank
Round 15: Sorcerer
Round 16: Dragon Shaman
Round 17: Lurk
Round 18: Paladin
Round 19: Scout
Round 20: Incarnate
Round 21: Shadowcaster
Round 22: Dragonmarks
Round 23: Fighter
Round 24: Pets
Round 25: Warlock
Round 26: Monsters
Round 27: Ardent (exhibition round)
Round 28: Rogue
Round 29: Signature Spells
Round 30: Any Prior Ingredient
Round 31: Ranger
Round 32: Tanking
Round 33: Psychic Warrior
Round 34: Flight
Round 35: Binder
Round 36: Skill tricks
Round 37: Barbarian
Round 38: Fire

Spoiler: Way Old Stuff (2012 and earlier; Amechra's run as Chair)

Show

Round 1: Divine Mind
Round 2: Monk
Round 3: Marshal

[Zaq]

Here's a few gentle recommendations that are intended to improve scores and make things easier for the judges. As always, THE RECOMMENDATIONS IN THIS POST ARE NOT RULES. Judges and contestants are free to honor them or ignore them; my intent here is only to help, and NONE of what I'm saying here is required. (That said, did you see the new dispute guidelines? Those ARE rules, so please go read them. And I'm even going to be better about enforcing them this time.)

Recommendations:

• Double-check ALL of your prereqs. Every. Single. One. Feats, PrCs, whatever. You might even go so far as to spell out when you meet each one, but again, that's not a requirement. But one of the single biggest causes of point loss is failure to meet prereqs.
  
• Tell the judges what's cool about your build! You spent hours or days on this (y'know, probably) and know it inside and out, but the judges are getting a whole bunch of these dishes all at once and don't know the build history of each one. You're significantly more likely to score well if you spell out exactly what makes you awesome than if you try to just let it stand on its own.
  
• Make it easy to read! Skill tables are awful, though they're an incredibly necessary evil. Full Monster Manual-style statblocks are occasionally useful but are also insanely dense if not formatted well. Judges are very likely to miss something if you aren't careful with how you present your info. Remember that judging takes a lot of time, energy, and focus, so don't rely on the judge being willing/able to decode something in order to see what makes you interesting!
  
• Be memorable. Remember that we've all seen these ingredients used at least once before. What makes you different?

Something I've really come to realize over the last nearly forty rounds is that, unlike regular IC, we don't necessarily need godawful garbage ingredients, since it's still a fun challenge to try to fit the essence of what makes a class cool into six short levels. I'd been afraid to use this one since it seemed "too good," but honestly? I think you folks can handle this and can still come up with some really creative stuff. Sing, O muse, of the trials of the bards!

[daremetoidareyo]

Yeehawwww!

[MinimanMidget]

Am I reading correctly that this is not a high Originality round? Either way, I strongly agree that E6 doesn't need garbage ingredients to keep the contest interesting. I'll try to come up with an entry.

[H_H_F_F]

Interesting.

Hard ingredient. Bard has been dug through a lot over the years. I don't know that I can come up with a new unifying weird trick. I'll try to participate anyway - I can probably build an interesting bard, and this is the bard round, after all, not the "one weird trick" round.

... Not that that'd be a terrible idea for a round, actually. A bit loose, sure, but it'll get the juices flowing.

Anyway, I'll see what I can come up with!

In the meantime, if anyone reading this is interested in judging this round of the main Iron Chef competition, I'm sure we'll all be very appreciative!

Also, just under a week left for this round of the Villainous Competition, which you can find in my signature.

[Venger]

In to cook. This'll be a fun one.

[thorr-kan]

Bard. Huh. Shiny!

[loky1109]

It seems I'll be judge this round. I'll be in the forest with friends all next week.

[H_H_F_F]

It seems I'll be judge this round. I'll be in the forest with friends all next week.

Thanks, loky!
Have fun!

[AsuraKyoko]

Interesting ingredient. Count me in to cook!

[The Viscount]

I'm hooked.

[daremetoidareyo]

I'm super psyched for this round. I know i suggested it and everything, but in reality, i didn't have any plans already set in place. And then...I found something beautiful.

[H_H_F_F]

Everything I come up with is so booooring

Bards are too good.

[MinimanMidget]

May I please request an extension? I don't think I can get it finished tonight.

[Zaq]

I've had multiple requests for an extension, so the deadline is now a week from today! I'll update the OP right now.

[MinimanMidget]

I've had multiple requests for an extension, so the deadline is now a week from today! I'll update the OP right now.

Thanks Zaq, that's a relief.

[daremetoidareyo]

Thanks zaq

[Zaq]

Found out I'm a little more busy tonight than expected, so the reveal will most likely be tomorrow evening.

[Zaq]

Band: First Level Spells
Album: Sonic Fire
Song: Pyroclastic Lava Waltz

Iron Chef Appetiser: Brighid Smith, The Elvish Fire Dancer!



Equipment: Two Throwing Axes, a Chain Shirt

Alingment: Chaotic Good

Race: Sliverbrow Human

Stats

Str 10 Int 12

Dex 16 Wis 10

Con 15 Cha 14

ASI to Con


The idea of this build is very simple:
1: Use Dragonfire Inspiration+Punishing Stance to get +GazillionD6 on every attack

2: Use sources of extra attacks such as TWF and Wolf Fang Strike to put those D6s to good use

3: Use spells to do Gishy things.

Spoiler: The Build

Show

Level	Class	Base Attack Bonus	Fort Save	Reflex Save	Will Save	Skills	Feats	Class Features
1st	Bard 1	+0	+0	+2	+2	Concentration 4, Spell Craft 4, Preform (Dance) 4, Tumble 4 Jump 4 Knowledge (Arcana 4), (Nature 4)	Dragonfire Inspiration, Weapon Finesse	Bardic music, bardic knowledge, countersong, fascinate, inspire courage +1
2nd	Warblade 2	+1 (+2)	+2	+3 (+4)	+3	Balance 5		Battle clarity (Reflex saves), weapon aptitude
3rd	Bard 2	+2 (+3)	+2	+3 (+4)	+3	Concentration 6, Spell Craft 5 Preform (Dance) 6 Tumble 6	Somatic Weaponry (CM)
4th	Bard 3	+3 (+4)	+3	+3 (+4)	+3	Concentration 7, Preform (Dance) 7, Tumble 7 Jump 5 Knowledge (Arcana 5), (Nature 5), (Religion 2)		Inspire competence
5th	Bard 4	+4 (+5)	+3	+4 (+5)	+4	Concentration 8, Preform (Dance) 8, Tumble 8 Knowldge (Religion 3), Skill Trick	Collector of Stories
6th	Bard 5	+4 (+5)	+3	+4 (+5)	+4	Concentration 9, Preform (Dance) 9, Tumble 9 (Arcana 6), (Nature 6), (Religion 4)	Song of The Heart

Spoiler: Epic Feats

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Epic Feats
Dragontouched (Dragon Magic)
Draconic Heritage (Dragon Magic)
Melodic Casting (Complete Mage)
Travel Devotion
Two Weapon Fighting
Improved Ininative
Knowledge Devotion
Travel Devotion
Travel Devotion
Travel Devotion

Spoiler: Lv1-3: I do 8d6 Damage at level 3

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Spoiler: Standard Steps

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Standard Steps:

Dragonfire Inspiration (Feat): 1d6 fire damage, scales with Inspire Courage

Somantic Weaponary (Feat) Cast Spells while TWF/ holding a shield

Prestidigitation (Cantrip): Do a magic trick.

Mending (Cantrip): Magic sewing kit

Message (Cantrip): Magic walky-talky

Mage Hand (Cantrip): Short range telekinesis

Flare (Cantrip): Dazzle one creature

Ray Of Hope (1st lv Spell) (BoED) +2 morale bonus on saving throws, attack rolls, ability checks and skill checks.

Inspirational Boost (1st lv Spell) (SC) +1 to inspire courage

Punishing Stance (1st lv Stance): +1d6 Damage, -2AC

Moment of Perfect Mind
(1st lv Manuver): Concentration ranks to Will

Wolf Fang Strike (1st lv Manuver): TWF as a standard action, -2/-2 attack mod

Steely Strike (1st lv Manuver): Hit two foes with one attack

Brighid had finally passed bard college! It was time to show the awesomeness of elvish fire dancing to the world! Preferably on monster butt.

Brighid starts her adventures in Bard for Elvish Fire Dance(st) Dragonfire Inspiration, and then moves over to Warblade for Wolf Fang Strike. Brighid can now Wolf Fang Strike every other turn by abusing the fact that Warblade can use attacks to refresh it's Manuvers. She also has full movement during this, which is quite nice. Then she heads back to Bard for First Level Spells.

Brighid now has a buffing routine. First she makes sure she's in Punishing Stance, and then when combat starts she drops an Inspirational Boost (Swift Action) into Bardic Music (Standard Action) 3d6 of extra damage die, that always work. The party rouge is going want his guild training "refunded"

Now for the fun part: While under her buffs Brighid's basic attacks do 4d6 damage. (1d6 From a Throwing Axe, 1d6 From Punishing Stance, 2d6 From Dragonfire Inspiration.) When using Wolf Fang Strike, this can be doubled to 8d6.

If she NEEDS to hit something she uses Inspire Courage for the +2 Attack Roll bonus. This lowers her damage to 2d6+2 per attack, though. If she needs the damage too, just cast Ray Of Hope instead. (Apparently, Brighid took a choral music class at bard college) And... remember that she will be buffing her parties damage output as well.

Brighid also grab Somantic Weaponry, which lets her TWF and Gish.


Skills Wise: Concentration for Spells and Moment of Perfect Mind, Spell Craft for Somantic Weaponry, Preform for Bardic Music, Tumble for evading AoO, Balance for avoiding being flat-footed, Knowledge because bardic knowledge.

Spoiler: LV 4-6: Not much better at dancing, but better at spells

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Spoiler: Magic Dance Steps

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Light (Cantrip) This + Somantic Weaponry = Glowy Sword. 11/10, Best Cantrip

Herald's Call (1st lv Spell) (SC): Slows targets with 5HD or less

Improvision (1st Lv Spell) (SC): Grants a pool of Luck Point (CLx2) that can be used to applied to attack rolls, skill checks and ability checks.

Bladeweave (2nd Lv Spell) (CAd)
After an attack, make a follow-up touch attack that dazes

Cure Moderate Wound: Heal 2d8+CL Hit points

Whirling Blade (2nd Lv Spell) (CAr)
Hurls a single slashing weapon, allowing you to attack all foes in a 60ft line

"Aww man..." "Whats up?" "I haven't improved my dancing skill at all! It's not fair! You've got some great Manuvers Like-" "IRON HEART SURGE" "Really, Caleb? Really?"

Not much happens for these three levels apart from getting another 1d6 of damage. Or at least, things that are worth talking about now. The primary things to talk about are the new spells. Improvision lets Brighid be really good at an important skill check. Cure Moderate Wound lets her heal... yay...

However, the most interesting thing is Whirling Blade:
[Compete Arcane] "The weapon deals damage just as if you had swung it in melee, including any bonuses you might have from ability scores or feats" This wording may allow Brighid to apply Punishing Stance and Dragonfire Inspiration to it, thereby allowing it to benefit from her main sources of damage.

To get the maximum benefit from a swift action spell in combat, Brighid makes sure to use the spell on the same turn she uses a Wolf Fang Strike. This is because on her other turns swift action will be used to do other things, such as recharging her Warblade Manuvers.

She also does 5d6 damage with her basic attacks now, but that's not important.

Spoiler: EPIC: Nothing resists my flames, for they deal SONIC DAMAGE!!!

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Feel the wrath of my Pyroclastic Lava Waltz, foolish beasties! MY FIRE IS HOTTER THAN YOURS!- Brighid Smith, before taking on a horde of fire elementals at Pelor's Wroth

Dragon touched > Draconic Heritage (Feat Chain) (DM)
Lets Brighid do the Pyroclastic Lava Waltz by letting her change the element of her Dragonfire Inspiration to Sonic. This is thanks to Brighid having Pyroclastic Dragon ancestor. Somehow.

Melodic Casting (Feat) (CM) Lets Brighid keep up a Inspirational Boost boosted Dragonfire Inspiration all day.

This also means she changes her buffing routine to Ray of Hope (Standard) + Bladeweave (Swift). This new routine let's her hit things more often, die less often and daze people. With her awesomeness.

Even better, she does not need to buff to be effective, because if she misses out on her routine she only loses out attack roll and defensive bonuses, meaning she's still doing 10d6 damage every other round!

Travel Devtion (Feat) (CC)

And now, once per day Brighid can use full round actions to our hearts content, without disadvantages. This makes more sense for her with...

TWF (Feat)

Brighid now changes her buffing routine to Ray of Hope and Travel Devotion. Now nothing will stand before her and the power of 10d6 damage every round. At least, once per day.

Improved Initiative (Feat)
Brighid wants to go first so she can buff first. As any gish worth her salt knows, the person who buffs first, Wins

Knowledge Devotion (Feat)
Free damage by passing knowledge checks? And you can a +2 most of the time by having the collector of stories Skill Trick? Brighid thinks this feat is is awesome. That mean you should too. Why? Because she's a expert on awesome, that's why!

3 Extra uses of Travel Devotion (Feat)
Brighid wants the power to destroy everything in her path four time per day. I don't blame her.

[Zaq]

Band: Noxious Smokesticks
Album: Crystalfall
Song: Razor Ice

Corax of the Black Rooks
CE Kenku Bard 6

Spoiler: Introduction

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The children throw snowballs in Sunset Park, until they see the clouding of their breath on the freezing air and decide to be dragons instead. They roar and swoop at each other, arms outstretched and flapping. Their parents, huddled in the warmth of the bright pavilions scattered between the paths, watch indulgently as they sip their mulled wine. There are dancers and singers, jugglers and jongleurs, storytellers and shopkeepers, each vying to capture the attention of those gathered to celebrate this Crystalfall.

Corax drifts among the crowd, nibbling absently at a piece of sausage on a stick. Not bad, he decides, and the same can be said of the bard singing that old standard ‘The Glass Tower’s Shards’. The ballad is so traditional, so familiar, that it would take an extraordinary voice to make it anything other than deathly dull; the singer manages to make it merely boring. Unsurprising, Corax thinks in a moment of reflexive, professional scorn. Human voices are nothing special in timbre or expression.

Or resonance.

The bard holds her final note with inexcusably overdone vibrato, and Corax walks on without even pretending to join in the faint, polite applause. The gong will sound soon, calling spectators to the Sculpture Platform, but anyone who waits that long will find themselves stuck at the back of the crowd. Corax has never cared for being jostled.

The judges are already on the Platform, moving among the delicate, gleaming towers of carved ice. They mutter commentary to each other, examining every minute detail critically and comparing notes. There’s only one of them that really matters, though, and Corax watches the proud old woman as she bends down to examine the intricate filigree of a sculptor’s signature on a translucent spire.

Her knees creak.

To the left, the sculptors wait behind a silken rope. They watch the judges hungrily, anxiously; when two of them shake their heads over one sculpture, there’s an audible gasp from their ranks. It’s always struck Corax as funny. There’s the cost of the ice – because the artists will not accept just any lump of solid water - then the cost of their magically-insulated workshops, kept at precise temperature for weeks while the artists carve – and the strain, stress, and sabotage inevitable in any competition. All this for some fancy icebergs that will be on display for one day, then thrown into the Dagger to melt.

That’s unfairly dismissive, he supposes. There are stranger ways to express power, and they all serve to feed him and his kind.

The old woman straightens and clears her throat. It’s barely audible over the sounds of the festival, but the other judges turn at her signal. She nods.

The mallet of the gong swings out.

Corax inhales.

The mallet arcs in.

The gong shivers with the contact, its low note booming out.

Corax sings to the ice. His note is high, sustained and perfectly pitched. The sculpture explodes outward into razor-sharp shards.

He is gone before the old lady falls.

Spoiler: Ability Scores

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Ability	Score	Modifiers	Final Score
Strength	9	-2 (racial)	7 (-2)
Dexterity	14	+2 (racial)	16 (+3)
Constitution	14	Starting languages: Common, Kenku, Auran, Gnome	14 (+2)
Intelligence	14	-	14 (+2)
Wisdom	8	-	8 (-1)
Charisma	17	+1 (Level 4)	18 (+4)

Spoiler: Build

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Level	Class	Base Attack Bonus	Fort Save	Reflex Save	Will Save	Skills	Feats	Class Features
1st	Bard	+0	+0	+2	+2	Bluff (+4) 4; Craft (alchemy) (+4) 4; Diplomacy (+4) 4; Disguise (+4) 4; Hide (+4) 4; Knowledge (arcana) (+4) 4; Move Silently (+4) 4; Perform (sing) (+4) 4;	Darkstalker	Bardic music, bardic knack, mimicking song, fascinate, inspire courage +1
2nd	Bard	+1	+0	+3	+3	Bluff (+1) 5; Craft (alchemy) (+1) 5; Diplomacy (+1) 5; Disguise (+1) 5; Hide (+1) 5; Knowledge (arcana) 4; Move Silently (+1) 5; Perform (sing) (+1) 5; Speak Language (elvish);
3rd	Bard	+2	+1	+3	+3	Bluff (+1) 6; Craft (alchemy) (+1) 6; Diplomacy (+1) 6; Disguise (+1) 6; Hide (+1) 6; Knowledge (arcana) 4; Move Silently (+1) 6; Perform (sing) (+1) 6; Speak Language (halfling);	Ice Harmonics	Inspire competence
4th	Bard	+3	+1	+4	+4	Bluff (+1) 7; Craft (alchemy) (+1) 7; Diplomacy (+1) 7; Disguise (+1) 7; Hide (+1) 7; Knowledge (arcana) 4; Move Silently (+1) 7; Perform (sing) (+1) 7; Speak Language (dwarven);
5th	Bard	+3	+1	+4	+4	Bluff (+1) 8; Craft (alchemy) (+1) 8; Diplomacy (+1) 8; Disguise (+1) 8; Hide (+1) 8; Knowledge (arcana) 4; Move Silently (+1) 8; Perform (sing) (+1) 8; Speak Language (orc);
6th	Bard	+4	+2	+5	+5	Bluff (+1) 9; Craft (alchemy) (+1) 9; Diplomacy (+1) 9; Disguise (+1) 9; Hide (+1) 9; Knowledge (arcana) 4; Move Silently (+1) 9; Perform (sing) (+1) 9; Speak Language (Quor) (+1) 5;	Jack of All Trades	Suggestion

Epic Feats
Obtain Familiar
Improved Familiar (air elemental)
Song of the Heart
Winter's Blast
Music of Making
Extra Music
Lyric Spell
Force of Personality
Great Fortitude
Extra Music

Spoiler: Spells per Day

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Level	0th	1st	2nd
1st	2	-	-
2nd	3	0+1	-
3rd	3	1+1	-
4th	3	2+1	0+1
5th	3	3+1	1+1
6th	3	3+1	2+1

Spoiler: Spells Known

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Level	0th	1st	2nd
1st	Detect Magic, Lullaby, Message, Prestidigitation	-	-
2nd	Detect Magic, Lullaby, Mage Hand, Message, Prestidigitation	Disguise Self, Sleep	-
3rd	Detect Magic, Ghost Sounds, Lullaby, Mage Hand, Message, Prestidigitation	Disguise Self, Silent Image, Sleep	-
4th	Detect Magic, Ghost Sounds, Lullaby, Mage Hand, Message, Prestidigitation	Disguise Self, Silent Image, Sleep	Detect Thoughts, Ice Darts
5th	Detect Magic, Ghost Sounds, Lullaby, Mage Hand, Message, Prestidigitation	Disguise Self, Share Talents, Silent Image, Unseen Servant	Detect Thoughts, Heroism, Ice Darts
6th	Detect Magic, Ghost Sounds, Lullaby, Mage Hand, Message, Prestidigitation	Disguise Self, Share Talents, Silent Image, Unseen Servant	Detect Thoughts, Heroism, Ice Darts

Spoiler: Level 1

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So we're a Kenku, in a world where hardly anyone even knows they exist. We don't want to give that secret away, so we're going to be very sneaky. If you want to sneak around in a world of magic, you have to have Darkstalker. We maintain a disguise at all times, and keep flash pellets and smokesticks handy in case we ever get caught and can't talk our way out of it. Like many first-level characters, we're going to be plinking with a crossbow most of the time if we find ourselves in a fight. Tanglefoot bags, noxious smokesticks, and alchemist's fire/frost/spark, or the slightly more powerful (but also more expensive) acidic fire are all useful in combat, but too expensive to use all the time, especially at level 1. Mimicking song is a really cool ability that suits a kenku sneak perfectly. Bardic knack isn't particularly useful to begin with, but it gets better later. Fascinate and inspire courage, on the other hand, are only going to be useful in extremely niche situations. Our selection of cantrips offers a variety of utility effects.

Spoiler: Level 2

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Not much changes at this level. Learning languages is important for bardic abilities to function, and it's obviously useful for spying purposes. First level spells are nice - sleep is well known for its fight-ending ability at low levels, and disguise self both allows for more potent disguises, and allows you to switch disguises on the fly.

Spoiler: Level 3

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Ice Harmonics is a very cool (pun intended) feat that allows you to explode ice with your voice to damage nearby enemies. It's obviously situational, since it requires nonmagical ice in your opponent's square, but on the bright side, it's 2d6 + Cha, no save, no attack roll. So how do we get ice near our enemies? Well, if we have the time to set it up, wetting the floor, then freezing it with freeze powder should work. Powdered water lets you do it without having to carry a bunch of water around yourself. If you've got the time to do it, you can even combine this with razor ice powder to turn chokepoints into razor ice (similar to spike growth, but more damage), although razor ice is explicitly magical, so you can't blow those squares up with Ice Harmonics. We also get inspire competence at this level. It's an ability that I think gets underrated - if you use it and Aid Another, you can significantly boost an ally's skill check. Of course, we may not have any allies to work with - more on that later.

Spoiler: Level 4

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Second level spells! Detect Thoughts is fabulously useful for both spying and detection, but the big item here is Ice Darts. It's a strong damage spell to begin with, but more importantly, it's a Conjuration (Creation) spell with SR: No and Duration: Instantaneous. That being the case, the actual ice objects created by the spell are not magical and don't disappear after they hit an enemy. Which means they can then be exploded, one by one, with Ice Harmonics! There's obviously a big problem with this - if the enemy moves after being hit with the spell, they won't be in the same square as the ice. A surprise round, or even just a tanglefoot bag could help with this, but neither of those are a reliable solution. More on this later, too.

Spoiler: Level 5

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At this point, Sleep is really starting to lose its usefulness, so it's time to swap it out. Share Talents is a really cool spell that gives two creatures a long-lasting bonus to skill checks, as long as one of them has at least one rank in the skill. Unseen Servant is fairly useful in general, but in our case, it has a specific purpose - it can pick up ice darts and drop them in enemy squares to be exploded. Finally Heroism is just a nice +2 to pretty much everything.

Spoiler: Level 6

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The combination of Jack of All Trades and Bardic Knack is fairly well known, if only because it's so useful. In our case, the main point isn't just to personally make untrained skill checks, but also to be able to make Aid Another checks to help your teammates.

Spoiler: Obtain Familiar, Improved Familiar

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A familiar is enormously useful. It shares our skill ranks, and with inspire competence, Aid Another, and (if the situation calls for it) even share talents and heroism, we can give it a hefty bonus to any skill we need. It can also Aid Another us, if we'd prefer to make the check ourselves (such as crafting). On top of that, it can also pick up dropped ice darts and drop them in enemy squares for us to blow up. Our familiar of choice is an air elemental, which is a nice thematic match for a kenku, as well as being able to fly and speak Auran.

Spoiler: Song of the Heart

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Inspire competence is cool, and this increases the size of the bonus we can provide. It also boosts inspire courage, fascinate, and suggestion, for the rare occasion where any of those are a worthwhile use of our time.

Spoiler: Winter's Blast

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This is a nice two-for-one. It gives us (finally) a way to deal damage without using spell slots, music uses, or even alchemical items. It also boosts the caster level on Ice Darts to a third dart - more damage, another bit of ice to explode.

Spoiler: Music of Making

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It's very important to have a good track for your crafting montages! Since we already have Song of the Heart, this is a hefty +6 to Craft checks.

Spoiler: Extra Music

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We have a lot of ways to use Bardic Music, and six per day just isn't going to be enough.

Spoiler: Lyric Spell

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I know I just said that we didn't have enough Bardic Music, but it's not like we've got a lot of spell slots, either. We can't burn music to use spells all the time, but the ability to create an extra spell slot or two when you really need to will definitely come in handy sometimes.

Spoiler: Force of Personality

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A +5 to almost every Will save we'll ever make is well and truly worth the price of entry.

Spoiler: Great Fortitude

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+2 is a lot less impressive than +5, no doubt about it, but a terrible Fort save is a bad weakness to have.

Spoiler: Extra Music

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Ten musics is still a little thin, considering everything we're planning on doing with it, but fourteen will hopefully get us through most days.

Spoiler: Stats

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Hit Dice: 6d6 (38.5 hp)
Initiative: +3
Speed: 30 ft.
Armor Class: 17 (+4 chain shirt +3 Dex), touch 13, flat-footed 14
Base Attack/Grapple: +4/+2
Saves: Fort +6, Ref +8, Will +4 (+9 against mind-affecting)
Skills: Bluff +13, Craft (alchemy) +11, Diplomacy +13, Disguise +13, Hide +14, Knowledge (arcana) +6, Move Silently +14, Perform (sing) +13
Other skills: Str-based +1, Dex-based +6, Con-based +5, Int-based +5, Wis-based +2, Cha-based +7

Spoiler: Sources

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• Kenku: MM3
• Bardic Knack, Share Talents: PHB2
• Mimicking Song: Dungeonscape
• Darkstalker: Lords of Madness
• Ice Harmonics, Ice Darts, freeze powder, razor ice powder: Frostburn
• Powdered Water: Dragon Compendium
• Jack of All Trades, Extra Music, Lyric Spell, Force of Personality, flash pellets: Complete Adventurer
• Obtain Familiar: Complete Arcane
• Improved Familiar: DMG
• Song of the Heart, Magic of Making, acidic fire, noxious smokestick, alchemist's frost, alchemist's spark: Eberron Campaign Setting
• Winter's Blast: Complete Mage
• Everything else: SRD content

[Zaq]

Band: Silvers from Hamlets
Album: Namey Tames
Song: 1d10 Miles

Namey Namesong

NG spellscale bonesinger: Undead(augmented humanoid) (dragonblood)

Loresong Dead Levels Bard 5/Ardent 1

You hear that noise, son? That's Namey. He sets the schedule around here. Every friday night, the undead join us and party, leaving goods and cash in the little tribute posts near the drummers guild. Namey tames the beasts of these woods, makes them gentle. I heard that even the were-rats of Myth Draegor's sewers pay a tribute to the lord of music, Namey.

Folks say that he was a gifted musician who died. The Spellscale draconic circle magic are said to have animated him after his untimely death. Folks say that they even mixed in the bones of other famous musicians, creating the lord of song up on Old Splinter peak mountain. The guy can Wail. They say that on clear nights, he can be heard in Port City of Far Reach. And sure enough, I saw a courier carrying a massive chunk of change to add to our tribute.

Spoiler: Abilities

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Abilities	Initial	Race / Template	4th
STR	8		8
DEX	9		9
CON	8	-2 (6) / NA	-
INT	16		16
WIS	15		15
CHA	17	+2	20

Spoiler: Tables

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Level	Class	Base Attack Bonus	Fort Save	Reflex Save	Will Save	Skills	Feats	Class Features
1st	Loresong Bard	0	0	2	2	36: {+4} Perform (wind instruments): 4; {+4} Diplomacy: 4; {+3} perform (stringed instruments): 3; {+2} Perform (storytelling): 2; {+4} Bluff: 4; {+3} gather information: 3; {+4} Use Magic Device: 4; {+4} Listen: 4; {+4} sense motive: 4; {+1} knowledge (geography): 1;	Favored In guild (Performers)	Bardic music, countersong, fascinate, inspire courage +1, Loresong
2nd	Dead Level Bard	1	0	3	3	9: {+1} Perform (wind instruments): 5; {+1} Diplomacy: 5; perform (stringed instruments): 3; Perform (storytelling): 2; {+1} Bluff: 5; {+1} gather information: 4; {+1} Use Magic Device: 5; {+1} Listen: 5; sense motive: 4; knowledge (geography): 1; {+2} 2; Listen to this skill trick	Listen to this (Skill trick)	Rally Performance
3rd	Bard	2	1	3	3	9: {+1} Perform (wind instruments): 6; {+1} perform (sing): 1; {+1} Diplomacy: 6; perform (stringed instruments): 3; Perform (storytelling): 2; {+1} Bluff: 6; gather information: 4; {+1} Use Magic Device: 6; Listen: 5; {+4} Concentration: 4; sense motive: 4; knowledge (geography): 1; 2;	Versatile Performer (stringed instruments, singing, storytelling)	Inspire competence
4th	Dead Level Bard	3	1	4	4	9: {+1} Perform (wind instruments): 7; {+1} perform (sing): 2; {+1} Diplomacy: 7; {+1} perform (stringed instruments): 4; {+1} Perform (storytelling): 3; {+1} Bluff: 7; gather information: 4; {+1} Use Magic Device: 7; {+1} Listen: 6; {+1} Concentration: 5; sense motive: 4; knowledge (geography): 1; 2;		Refine Performance
5th	Bard	3	1	4	4	9: {+1} Perform (wind instruments): 8; {+1} perform (sing): 3; {+1} Diplomacy: 8; {+1} perform (stringed instruments): 5; {+1} Perform (storytelling): 4; {+1} Bluff: 8; gather information: 4; {+1} Use Magic Device: 8; {+1} Listen: 7; {+1} Concentration: 6; sense motive: 4; knowledge (geography): 1; 2;
6th	Ardent	3	1	4	6	7: {+2 CC} Perform (wind instruments): 9; perform (sing): 3; Diplomacy: 8; {+4} psicraft: 4; perform (stringed instruments): 5; Perform (storytelling): 4; Bluff: 8; gather information: 4; Use Magic Device: 8; Listen: 7; {+1} Concentration: 7; sense motive: 4; knowledge (geography): 1; 2;	practiced manifester	Communication Mantle (Telempathic projection, missive), Mental power Mantle

Epic Feats	Source	Prereqs
Favored (performers)	Cityscape p.61	membership in guild
Expanded knowledge (control sound)	xph p.46	manifester level 3rd
Negotiator	srd	-
Business Savvy	Dungeon Master's Guide II, p. 184	Negotiator
Primary contact	cityscape p.61	favored
Subsonics	Complete adventurer p.112	Perform (any) 10 ranks, bardic music,
Soothe the beast	Eberron Campaign setting p.60	Perform 6 ranks, Bardic music class feature,
Undead empathy	Eberron Campaign Setting p. 61	charisma 13
wanderer's diplomacy	PHB2 p.85	4 ranks in Bluff, Diplomacy, and Sense Motive,
Dragonfire inspiration	Dragon Magic p. 17	CHA 11, bardic music, dragonblood subtype,

Citations	Source	More information
Dead level Bard	web	Spoiler Show Rally Performance (Ex): Starting at 2nd level, a bard hones his skill as a public musician and can reroll a Perform check once per day, but only when attempting to impress audiences for the purpose of earning money. A bard must take the result of the reroll, even if it's worse than the original roll. See the Perform skill description. Refine Performance (Ex): At 4th level, a bard learns how to make his performances more appealing to the public of a prosperous city and is considered to have rolled at least a 2 on each d10 or d6 when determining how much money was earned each day from a Perform check. See the Perform skill description. At 5th, 7th, 10th, 11th, 13th, 16th, and 17th level, a bard is considered to have rolled 1 number higher on each d10 (for example, a least 3 at 5th level, at least 4 at 7th level, etc.).
Loresong Bard	Dungeonscape p.8	Spoiler Show Level: 1st. Replaces: Do not gain the bardic knowledge ability. Benefit: 1/day, as an immediate action, you can gain a +4 insight bonus on a single attack, check, or save. You gain one additional daily use of this ability at every odd-numbered bard level (3rd, 5th, and so on).
Bonesinger	Ghostwalk p.157 + 3.5 update	Spoiler Show Hit Dice: Increase to d12. AC: A bonesinger gains a +3 natural armor bonus. If the base creature already has natural armor, use the better value. Special Attacks: A bonesinger retains all the spe- cial attacks of the base creature and gains the follow- ing special attack. Wind of Death (Su): Once per day, a bonesinger can create a roiling area of winds that smells of rotting corpses. The wind of death works like a gust of wind, plus any creature caught in it must succeed on a Fortitude save (DC 10 + 1/2 bonesinger’s HD + bonesinger’s Cha modifier) or be nauseated for 1d4+1 rounds. Special Qualities: A bonesinger retains all the special qualities of the base creature and gains the following abilities. Cooperative Magic (Sp) Corrupt Healing: A bonesinger produces inflict effects with its spells instead of cure effects. Singing Bones (Sp): Before it is animated as an undead, the bones of a bonesinger are carved with grooves and tiny holes by a master musician. The unnatural breeze that surrounds a bonesinger augments its musical per- formance, giving it a +2 bonus on all Perform checks as if it had the Skill Focus (Perform) feat. It loses this bonus when it is within an area of silence or in any place with no air (underwater, in a vacuum, and so on). Because of the constant noise about it, a bonesinger takes a –10 penalty on Move Silently checks.
Spellscale	Races of the Dragon p.23
Hlal Meditation	Races of the Dragon p.25	Spoiler Show He gains a (racial)bonus on Perform (storytelling) checks (1/2 Character level) and the use of the Heighten Spell feat three times on that day.
Favored in Guild	DMG 2 p.227	Spoiler Show Select one of your guild's associated skills. As long as you remain a member of that guild, you gain a +2 competence bonus on all checks made with that skill. Performer: While in a city that has a guildhouse, you can substitute a Perform or Profession check for a Diplomacy or Gather Information check by offering your service for free. In addition, you gain twice the normal income when using the Perform or Profession skill to earn money.
Listen to This	complete scoundrel p.87	Spoiler Show Prerequisite Listen 5 ranks, Benefit Whenever you make a successful Listen check to hear a noise, you can describe that sound any time up to 1 hour later with such clarity that any individuals hearing the description are treated as if they had heard the sound themselves.
Versatile Performer	Complete Adventurer p.112	Spoiler Show Prerequisite Perform (any) 5 ranks Benefit Pick a number of Perform categories equal to your Intelligence bonus (minimum 1). For the purpose of making Perform checks, you are treated as having a number of ranks in those skills equal to the highest number of ranks you have in any Perform category. You cannot change these categories once you have picked them, but your score in them automatically increases if you later add additional ranks in your highestranked Perform category. You gain new categories of your choice if your Intelligence bonus permanently increases. In addition, you gain a +2 bonus on a combined Perform check when using two or more forms of performance at the same time, such as a bard strumming a lyre while singing. In such cases, add the bonus to the higher of your two Perform skill modifiers.
Practiced manifester	complete Psionic p.57	Spoiler Show Prerequisite Psicraft 4 ranks,
Template instructions	Monster Manual p.291	Spoiler Show Generally, if a template does not cause a change to a certain statistic, that entry is missing from the template description
Cave Harp	Underdark p.67	Spoiler Show Caveharp: This small harp is a masterwork instrument that grants the user a +2 circumstance bonus on Perform checks made while playing it. Its sound carries for 1d6 miles down unobstructed tunnel passages, so it can both entertain and serve as a long-distance communication device.
Alphorn	Song and silence p.47	Spoiler Show Bardic Music: The alphorn’s deep pitch carries its sound to a distance of 1d10 miles. This allows the use of inspire greatness, countersong, and inspire courage effects even when great distances separate the musician from his or her listeners.
Oligarch	Power of Faerun p.74	Tables that add a +3 to profit checks for being an oligarch
Elven Harp	Races of the Wild p.169	Spoiler Show Like any masterwork instrument, an elven harp grants a +2 circumstance bonus on Perform checks made with it. Characters with at least 5 ranks in Perform (string instruments) gain an extra +1 circumstance bonus on Perform checks made with the harp (for a total bonus of +3). Hand: 150 gp, 2 lb.; Lap: 350 gp, 4 lb.; Great:1,500 gp, 150 lb.
Song Collar	Races of Stone p.160	Spoiler Show These iron tubes are designed to aid traveling musicians in learning new or complex compositions for the lute, violin, or another similar stringed instrument. Built to fit snugly over a normal quarterstaff, this item consists of a long metal collar that slips down over the top half of the staff. If a character uses a song collar for 1 hour a day on seven consecutive days, he gains a +2 bonus on Perform checks involving that particular instrument and composition. A song collar does not prevent a quarterstaff from being used normally in combat. Price 15 GP, 2 lbs.
Autonomous Harp	Dragon Compendium p.161	Spoiler Show The masterwork harp is a construct capable of movement and has statistics identical to a Medium animated object made of wood. Like a golem, it follows the commands of its creator or those its creator designates. In addition to the normal actions an animated object can take, the autonomous harp can be commanded to play itself as a free action (playing itself is also a free action for the harp), providing a +2 circumstance bonus on Perform checks made within 20 feet that would benefit from musical accompaniment. Price 6,250 gp; Weight 40 lb.

Spoiler: spells/powers

Show

Spells/Powers

Spell	Level	Source	Notes
Fine Tuning	0	Song and Silence	Spoiler Show Transmutation Casting Time: 1 round Range: Touch Target: One instrument Duration: 1 minute per level Spell Resistance: Yes (harmless) This spell enables the caster to make an ordinary instrument perform as if it were of masterwork quality. For the duration of the spell, the instrument grants the user a +2 circumstance bonus on Perform checks, or an alternate effect as described in Chapter 3 for that instrument type, if desired. Fine-tuning has no effect if cast upon an instrument already of masterwork quality. Focus: The target of the spell.
Songbird	0	Spell Compendium p.195	Spoiler Show Transmutation Casting Time: 1 round Range: Personal Target: You Duration: Performance +1 hour or until discharged; see text Anyone who hears or views your performance becomes favorably inclined toward you. This spell grants you a +1 competence bonus on your next Charisma-based check involving any one person who saw the performance. This effect lasts for the duration of your performance and up to 1 hour immediately following. You must begin the performance within 1 hour of casting the spell for it to have any effect.
Ghost harp	0	spell Compendium p.104	Spoiler Show Divination Casting Time: 1 minute Range: Touch Target: Object touched Duration: 5 minutes / level Saving Throw: None Spell Resistance: No You prepare an object that records and replays a song previously played or sung in its vicinity. When cast, the spell searches a radius of 50 feet for the lingering notes of a tune played there within the last day. It records these notes and reverberations. At your verbal command, "Play," the ghostharp replays the music. The tune repeats until you command it to stop, or until its duration comes to an end. The ghostharp does not record conversations. Its imperfect replay can't reproduce bardic music or other magical effects, nor can it cast spells.
Read Magic, Prestidigitation, Summon Instrument	0	CORE
Share Talents	1	PHB2	Spoiler Show +2 to skill checks at 10 min/level
Ghost Pipes	1	Lost Empires of Faerun	Spoiler Show Transmutation Casting Time: 1 standard action Range: Touch Target: One musical instrument Duration: 1 minute/level (D) Saving Throw: Will negates (object) Spell Resistance: Yes (object) By means of this spell, you can cause one musical instrument you touch to float a few feet above the ground and play itself. The instrument must be intact and in playable condition (no missing strings, clogged mouthpieces, or other impediments to proper use). The instrument plays any tune you desire as though a skilled musician were playing it, regardless of whether you can play the instrument in question. If used in conjunction with your bardic music ability, the ghost pipes grant a +2 competence bonus on your Perform check. Focus: The instrument to be played.
Inspirational Boost	1	Spell Compendium p. 124
Focusing Chant	1	Spell Compendium p.96	Spoiler Show Enchantment (Compulsion) Casting Time: 1 swift action Range: Personal Target: You Duration: 1 minute (D) You gain a +1 circumstance bonus on attack rolls, skill checks, and ability checks for the duration of the spell.
Fortissimo	2	Song and Silence	Spoiler Show Evocation Casting Time: 1 action Range: Medium (100 ft. + 10 ft./level) Target: One creature or item Duration: 1 minute/level Saving Throw: None Spell Resistance: No Fortissimo doubles the volume of one source of sound specified by the caster. Bards often use this spell to help their music carry to larger audiences—or just be heard over the din of a noisy tavern. When casting fortissimo on a creature, the caster may specify items that the creature is wearing or carrying for inclusion in the effect. For example, casting fortissimo on a singer and including her lute would make both her song and her accompaniment twice as loud. If the affected creature or item can generate a sonic or language-based attack, such as a command spell, a harpy's song, the fascinate effect of bardic music, or a horn of blasting, the saving throw DC against that attack increases by +2. If a sonic attack deals damage (like a shout), the spell increases that damage by +1d6 points. Fortissimo counters and dispels silence and is countered and dispelled by it. If cast at a target affected by silence, it negates the effect for that creature or item only.
Animate Instrument	2	Complete Scoundrel	Spoiler Show Transmutation Casting Time: 1 standard action Range: Touch Target: Instrument touched Duration: 1 minute/level Saving Throw: None Spell Resistance: No You imbue your musical instrument with the ability to play at your command. This instrument can play a tune on your behalf even while you are busy with other actions. As long as this spell is in effect, you can cause the instrument to begin playing as a swift action, effectively mimicking and continuing your performance. The instrument uses your Perform modifier for the purpose of bardic music checks. Once the animated instrument picks up the performance, you do not have to concentrate to maintain its effect. Thus, you can continue a performance or bardic music effect that relies on the use of a musical instrument and also cast spells, activate magic items by spell completion or command words, or even use another bardic music ability. You can animate any nonmagical musical instrument, such as a piano, fiddle, or harp. If the instrument must be carried or held while played, it floats in the air in the square in which you cast the spell. The animated instrument cannot move. It continues to play until the spell expires or the instrument is damaged. An animated instrument's AC is 10 + any relevant size modifiers; most handheld instruments are Tiny. Material Component:One working musical instrument.
Telempathic projection	1	SRD
Missive	1	SRD
Control Sound	2	SRD

Spoiler: Write up

Show

We are here to make money.
Look at this guy, well this corpse of a guy.
He was a spellscale. inherently charismatic.
But he was favored in guild, a performers guild. That means he gets double the money for his performances.
Not only that, but he was skilled in the alphorn. Those can be heard 1d10 miles away.
If we animate him as a bonesinger, we get rid of the fact that he’s a wimp, he’ll live forever, he’ll grow as a musician, and the wind in his bones will give him a skill focus in singing.
And as for dead levels, he has advantage on perform checks to make money
And later dead levels allow him to make a higher minimum on d10 and d6s rolled to earn money…and those dice are the same ones you use for alphorns and cave harps to determine the range of their sound penetration.
He’s a versatile performer, so he can combine his multi-instrumentality to the mix.
Which means if he performs on a mountain overlooking a prospersous city on land, and the cave leads to underground settlements, he can play his cave harp to reach 1d6 miles away.
When his spell casting grows, he can double to the reach of these performances by casting fortissimo.
Throw a few psionic bones in there, and he can manifest control sound turn these instruments noises into storytelling songs, combining his singing ability and racial proclivity for storytelling through Hlal into masterwork performances.
The versatility of combining multiple performance types will lead to bonuses from masterwork items stacking with the strange musical proclivities of storytelling and song as a giant lump performance check sum.
And if the bonesinger, keeps at it, he’ll be favored by another musicians guild, tripling or quadrupling his nightly earnings in towns that have guildhouses.
He’s undead, so he could develop undead empathy.
And if we are favored in multiple guilds and we control the nightly performances by having the ability to pitch sound 2d10 miles (minmum 6) above ground and 2d6 miles (minimum 4) underground. This makes the bonesinger an oligarch of sorts
So why not make him his own enterprise and create him a business. This will allow him to make monthly earnings checks based on his prodigious skill. And those earning checks will be tripled or quadrupled because he’s favored and favored in performing guilds.
The joy his music creates will endear him to nearby animals as well as the undead in these areas. It will also allow him to chase down rare instruments in the areas that can hear him if he performs for free as a gather information check with wanderer’s diplomacy. Im talking magic instruments and song collars of the great songs to train him in a masterful repertoire.
We will be on track to gather 9-12d6 (minmum 18-24) gold per prosperous city that is within soundshot of him. Not to mention all of the silvers from hamlets. And then, once per month he can make a profit check for his business, DC 25 with +20 something modifier, with each number above 25 being multiplied by 25 and then doubled twice because of the doubling of income from places with guild houses.
With primary contacts in these guilds, the bonesinger shall be able to harness their skill to master subsonics.
And at the height of his power, he’ll be able to make all allies within miles to wield fire through draconic inspiration.
This is why I am beseeching you, circle magic clerics of the spellscales, to create this bonesinger.

[Zaq]

Band: Haggard Thaddeus
Album: Hardened Criminal Keyboard Instruments
Song: The Tunes

Neil, Chitterer Regnant
N Rat Hengeyokai Bard 6

Stats

Spoiler

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(in hybrid form)
Str 9
Dex 10 (12)
Con 14
Int 14
Wis 12 (10)
Cha 17 (increase at 4)

Backstory

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The Grey family were a very respectable family. They lived in a grand old house out in the countryside, warm and dry even in the worst of weather. They had a beautiful daughter whom many wished to wed. As much as they wished that for her, they knew they could not choose her suitor yet. They wanted for her to raise her own family in one of the many rooms in the grand old house, but they knew that it wouldn’t be safe to do so as long as the giants were around. As long as anyone could remember, the giants had tromped around like they owned the world, eating everything in sight and causing great thunderous rackets wherever they went. The Grey family refused to leave the grand old house, but they knew this couldn’t stand. So they sent out for help.
They had begun to lose hope when Neil arrived. He cut an odd figure, piebald as he was, but there was a resolute energy in his eyes and a certain charm in his air. He told the Grey family that he would drive the giants out. He said that when he did, he would like to come live in the grand old house with their beautiful daughter, if she would have him. At this she tittered and hid her face behind her soft pink hands. The Grey family asked how they could help in his endeavor. He told them to call for every family ally and friend they could find, and let him do the rest.

~~~

Someone must have been playing tricks on Thaddeus Gonk. There had always been quiet noises in the nice little house at night, the sort of soft creaking of it settling. As he got on in years he was starting to understand how it felt. He certainly was no stranger to his own cracks and groans. Lately he had been hearing different noises. Scuttling, skittering, scratching noises. It had him on edge. Worse, the furniture had started moving. Not before his eyes, of course, but when he got up to get a cup of tea and returned to his favorite stuffed chair, it always seemed to be a little farther or a little closer to the wall than it was supposed to be.
And today, in the center of the drawing room, there was a stout little rat by the fireplace, looking for all the world like he was playing at a tiny rat-sized instrument. There was even plinky-plonky little rat music emanating from the thing. More still, the little fellow wasn’t all bad. Thaddeus rubbed his eyes as he stepped closer. No change. This was really happening. He couldn’t help but laugh. At the end of the little performance, he had to applaud.
“If you like it that much, you can show your appreciation in coin.”

Now this was too much. Thaddeus looked around for someone hiding in a cupboard before he realized the sound had come from the rat on the floor. He looked back. The rat had extended a little upturned paw, gesturing expectantly. The utter cheek of it! He couldn’t resist. Thaddeus fished a coin out of his purse and flipped it to the rat.
“Here you go, sir rat. That laugh was well worth it. Go ahead and give this to whoever it was. I’m impressed with the dedication. It’s got to be Gail the alewife, right? She never could resist a bit.”

To his astonishment, the rat caught the coin as it approached, and started to roll it away. He hadn’t really thought through what would happen, but tossing a coin to a musician was such a natural habit at this point he did it almost without thinking.

“I have neither master nor mistress, and my name is Neil.”
Thaddeus realized in the silence that remained that he had thrown the rat a gold piece. Surely he had meant to reach for a copper?

~~~

This was getting out of hand. One rat in the drawing room was a fine prank, but Thaddeus could swear he was seeing the fellow everywhere out of the corner of his eye. He’d look back and it would suddenly be on the other end of the room, or nowhere at all. He was hearing that music in his room at night, echoing through in his dreams. Once or twice he’d dozed off to it in his chair and woken up on his lawn. He swore he locked the door, but he must have unlocked it while sleepwalking. He liked living in the nice little house, but was it worth it? He’d considered asking for help from some of the other townspeople, but they’d laugh him out of the pub with a story like that. He’d almost worked up the courage the other day, but all he could manage was to say he’d been having rat problems. Everyone else had made very understanding noises, and then they moved on to ribbing Bob the vintner when he had trouble closing his tab.

~~~

Thaddeus was haggard when he answered the knock at the door. He’d been sleeping terribly, always trying to catch a glimpse of that rat he knew was watching. He’d been feeling ever more frequent creeping dread at the near-incessant scratching in the walls.
“What is it?”

The visitor seemed oddly familiar, but he couldn’t place him. There was a certain beadiness to his eyes that had Thaddeus guarded.
“Good evening. Are you Thaddeus Gonk?”

“I am. Who’s asking?”

“I have a proposition for you. I’d like to purchase your house.”
There was an oddly soothing rhythm to the stranger’s words, a sort of musical tint to his accent.

“This old house? I don’t know about that. I’ve lived here all my life.”

“Mr. Gonk, don’t you mind how far away it is from everything else?”

“Well I guess it is getting to be something of a walk to the pub nowadays.”

“Exactly. Now, I’m willing to make you a very generous offer for the house. We can close today, cash in hand.”
At this, Thaddeus saw the respectably sized sack of coin the stranger was brandishing towards him.

“Interesting, but I don’t think I can let it go for that little. Perhaps we can negotiate something more.”

“I’m not interested in haggling, Mr. Gonk. Your house is infested with rats. You should sell it to me before things get worse. I promise I can take care of them.”

“Infested? Now that’s going a bit far, don’t you think? I wouldn’t say – “

At this, he turned inside to gesture, and he saw them. Rats. Endless, countless, rats scurrying all across his floor, crawling up and down the walls. He snatched for the bag from the stranger’s hand and was already out the door, turning back over his shoulder to shout out, “Deal! Take the blasted place! Key’s on the hook. They’re your problem now!”

The stranger was already closing the door behind him, and the last glimpse Thaddeus caught through the crack was of the man’s face crinkling into a very ratlike smile.

Build

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Level	Class	Base Attack Bonus	Fort Save	Ref Save	Will Save	Skills	Feats	Class Features
1st	Bard 1	+0	+0	+2	+2	Bluff 4, Diplomacy 4, Hide 4, Move Silently 4, Perform (Keyboard Instruments) 4, Spellcraft 4, Tumble 4, Use Magic Device 4	Iron Will	Bardic Music, Bardic Knack, Fascinate, Inspire Awe, Mimicking Song
2nd	Bard 2	+1	+0	+3	+3	Bluff 5, Diplomacy 5, Hide 5, Move Silently 5, Perform (Keyboard Instruments) 5, Spellcraft 5, Tumble 5, Use Magic Device 5		Rally Performance
3rd	Bard 3	+2	+1	+3	+3	Intimidate 6, Perform (Keyboard Instruments) 6, Use Magic Device 8	Martial Study (Devoted Spirit(Crusader Strike))	Inspire Competence
4th	Bard 4	+3	+1	+4	+4	Bluff 7, Diplomacy 6, Intimidate 7, Perform (Keyboard Instruments) 7, Tumble 7, Use Magic Device 7		Refine Performance 2
5th	Bard 5	+3	+1	+4	+4	Bluff 8, Diplomacy 8, Hide 6, Intimidate 8, Perform (Keyboard Instruments) 8, Tumble 8, Use Magic Device 8		Refine Performance 3
6th	Bard 6	+4	+2	+5	+5	Bluff 9, Diplomacy 9, Hide 8, Intimidate 9, Perform (Keyboard Instruments) 9(10 with primary contact), Tumble 9, Use Magic Device 9	Hardened Criminal (Perform(Keyboard Instruments))	Suggestion

Epic Feats
Jack of All Trades
Melodic Casting
Favored (Performers Guild)
Primary Contact
Subsonics
Soothe the Beast
Doomspeak
Shape Soulmeld (Soulspeaker Circlet)
Open Least Chakra (Crown)
Bonus Essentia

Spells per Day/Spells Known

Level	0lvl	1st	2nd
1st	2/4
2nd	3/5	0*/2
3rd	3/6	1/3
4th	3/6	2/3	0*/2
5th	3/6	3/4	1/3
6th	3/6	3/4	2/3

Spells Known:
0th: Ghost Sound, Lullaby, Mage Hand, Prestidigitation, Resistance, Summon Instrument
1st: Charm Person, Grease, Immediate Assistance, Unseen Servant
2nd: Ice Darts, Invisibility, Dimension Leap

Play Tips

Spoiler

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Did this build crystallize from an old internet image? Yes. We’re going to run with this concept nonetheless, and the build is operated under the assumption that you will be in rat form at all times. The rat form as presented in OA is identical to the one in the srd, other than lacking a swim speed. Talk to your DM about whether you can consider this an update. I’d certainly argue that you should, but it’s not crucial to the build if you don’t. Regardless, you will have weapon finesse and some nice racial skill bonuses. Due to how hengeyokai works, if you need to be medium you can take hybrid form. There’s hardly any reason to take human form. The basic concept is investing heavily into skulking around while misleading and unnerving people.

To that end I’ve selected a few ACFs. Rally performance and refine performance are free, take them over nothing. Mimicking song lets you boost move silently for yourself and allies. Inspire awe allows you to render enemies shaken. Bardic knack allows you to effectively have 3 ranks in all skills, and when combined with jack of all trades it means you are also considered trained in everything. Is being kind of good at everything very impressive? Not especially, though it is very on-brand for bard and makes you a multi-instrumentalist. Is being kind of good at everything while being a rat significantly more impressive? I’d argue yes, as demonstrated here.

For feats, martial study is primarily here to get intimidate as a class skill, though having healing on hand is nice. I’ve taken it at 3 so there’s no question of being able to take a 1st level maneuver, but if your DM agrees that you can take it at 1, it would be nice to move up and start investing early. Iron will is needed for hardened criminal, which lets you take 10 with any one skill. I’ve selected perform, naturally, for better bardic music and casting, as melodic casting lets you use perform instead of concentration. Favored is primarily here for primary contact, though the benefit of double money from performing is quite nice. Primary contact gives you an extra skill point which can explicitly exceed normal caps. That’s good, because we need 10 ranks for subsonics, a neat feat that lets you affect enemies with bardic music without them knowing you’re doing it. That becomes especially fun when pelting them with doomspeak, to debuff them against all your other abilities. Make them afraid or fascinated, when they think it’s just because you’re a really cool rat. Soothe the beast lets you use bardic music to turn rats to your cause, on top of being able to speak with them via hengeyokai. For our last feats, the soulspeaker circlet when bound and invested lets you understand and speak 3 languages of your choice, a handy way to communicate while a rat and use suggestion even with its language restriction. Because of the way the essential effect works, you can remove and reinvest to select new languages when faced with different targets.

For skills, perform is naturally maxed out for bardic music purposes, bluff, diplo, and intimidate are natural face skills that follow, and tumble helps you get around unscathed. Hide of course helps you stay hidden, and UMD lets you use wands. If you’d like to focus more on wands, consider taking hardened criminal for UMD instead.

Let’s talk spells. Mage hand and unseen servant allow you to grab things out of reach, open doors, and generally operate in a medium-sized world. (Humorously, your strength in rat form is the same the unseen servant. You should be able to, if not pool your strength together, count as favorable conditions to let it drag up to 200 pounds.) Summon Instrument means you don’t have to worry about finding carrying space for your keyboard. Charm person is extremely valuable in manipulating people into forfeiting all mortal possessions. Grease and dimension leap are great for battlefield control and maneuverability. Invisibility of course has many uses in and out of combat. Ice Darts provides a reliable means of no-save damage.

Sources

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Rally Performance, Refine Performance: Dead Levels Web Enhancement
Hardened Criminal: City of Stormreach
Jack of All Trades: Complete Adventurer
Melodic Casting, Immediate Assitance: Complete Mage
Martial Study: Tome of Battle
Iron Will, Bard, Ghost Sound, Lullaby, Mage Hand, Prestidigitation, Resistance, Summon Instrument, Charm Person, Grease, Unseen Servant, Invisibility: Player’s Handbook
Soothe the Beast: Eberron Campaign Setting
Subsonics: Complete Adventurer
Favored, Primary Contact: Cityscape
Doomspeak: Champions of Ruin
Shape Soulmeld, Open Least Chakra, Bonus Essentia, Soulspeaker Circlet: Magic of Incarnum
Bardic Knack: Player’s Handbook 2
Hengeyokai: Oriental Adventures
Mimicking Song: Dungeonscape
Inspire Awe: Dragon Magic
Ice Darts: Frostburn
Dimension Leap: Magic of Eberron

[Zaq]

There you have it! They're finally here, performing for you! If you know the words, you can join in too! (And by join in too, I mean judging for us! Get to it!)

[loky1109]

I see you need a judge. I'm coming! Maybe tomorrow, maybe middle of the next week.

[daremetoidareyo]

I see you need a judge. I'm coming! Maybe tomorrow, maybe middle of the next week.

Excellent. Many thank yous

[loky1109]

Table.

Name	Alignment / Race	Class Levels	Chef	Total	Place
Brighid Smith	CG Sliverbrow Human	Bard 5/Warblade 1
Corax	CE Kenku	Bardic Knack Mimicking Song Bard 6
Namey Namesong	NG Bonesinger Spellscale	Loresong Dead Levels Bard 5/Ardent 1
Neil	NN Rat Hengeyokai	Bardic Knack Mimicking Song Dead Levels Bard 6

[H_H_F_F]

HM to Namey.

[loky1109]

I'm starting today.

[loky1109]

It seems I have a slight cold.

For now only one entry evaluated. I expect to recover by Monday-Tuesday and continue.

[loky1109]

Sorry for delaying. It should be done today.