Anonymouswizard's Astoundingly Assonant Random Banter #240

[Peelee]

Everyone in this thread finds themself teleported to a manor house in the middle of a seemingly abandoned city. It has foods and medicine and so on, enough to stay alive indefinitely... But ten minutes after we spawn in there are zombies at the gate.

Non-infectious but otherwise they're standard Romero types, a small hoard of them, and more show up every couple of days.

The first inanimate object you see after turning to your left is what you had to fight them off with.

I have... a reasonably heavy walking stick.

I have a pharmacy. Well, technically, a full convenience store and pharmacy.

[Rater202]

I have a pharmacy. Well, technically, a full convenience store and pharmacy.

...Okay, I think you win.

[Lord Raziere]

*looks left*

All I'd have are fantasy books and old dvds.

[enderlord99]

I have a bedsheet. Not sure if it's fitted or unfitted.

[Peelee]

...Okay, I think you win.

Drive throughs for the win!

[Keltest]

I have a grocery store supercenter type building. I picked a good time to read this thread.

[Peelee]

I have a grocery store supercenter type building. I picked a good time to read this thread.

Red or blue?

[Rater202]

I have a grocery store supercenter type building. I picked a good time to read this thread.

Sorry, peelee, Keltest just knocked you down to number 2.

[theangelJean]

I have ... An empty sewing machine box?

I'm dead.

[Rater202]

I have ... An empty sewing machine box?

I'm dead.

Well, remember, we're all there together. I'm sure that Peelee or Keltest can spare something for you.

[Peelee]

Well, remember, we're all there together. I'm sure that Peelee or Keltest can spare something for you.

I wanted to say that when you declared me the winner, and then again when you said I'm not in second place. I will definitely share the wealth.

[Qwertystop]

Everyone in this thread finds themself teleported to a manor house in the middle of a seemingly abandoned city. It has foods and medicine and so on, enough to stay alive indefinitely... But ten minutes after we spawn in there are zombies at the gate.

Non-infectious but otherwise they're standard Romero types, a small hoard of them, and more show up every couple of days.

The first inanimate object you see after turning to your left is what you had to fight them off with.

I have... a reasonably heavy walking stick.

Pile of miscellany from previous meals, none of which is any good for the job – empty juice bottle, bowl, spoon.

[LaZodiac]

Everyone in this thread finds themself teleported to a manor house in the middle of a seemingly abandoned city. It has foods and medicine and so on, enough to stay alive indefinitely... But ten minutes after we spawn in there are zombies at the gate.

Non-infectious but otherwise they're standard Romero types, a small hoard of them, and more show up every couple of days.

The first inanimate object you see after turning to your left is what you had to fight them off with.

I have... a reasonably heavy walking stick.

Exercise elliptical bike. So at least I'll be fit.

[TaiLiu]

Everyone in this thread finds themself teleported to a manor house in the middle of a seemingly abandoned city. It has foods and medicine and so on, enough to stay alive indefinitely... But ten minutes after we spawn in there are zombies at the gate.

Non-infectious but otherwise they're standard Romero types, a small hoard of them, and more show up every couple of days.

The first inanimate object you see after turning to your left is what you had to fight them off with.

I have... a reasonably heavy walking stick.

I have a glass mug! The undead are exceptionally vulnerable to glass, so I feel pretty safe.

[Beeftank]

I’m in my bedroom, so I have my dresser. The whole thing is kind of heavy, maybe I could take the drawers out and swing those around?

[Mystic Muse]

I have either my bedframe or my apartment wall depending on how you look at it.

[theangelJean]

Well, remember, we're all there together. I'm sure that Peelee or Keltest can spare something for you.

Ooh! Does that mean it's crazy scheme time? *Ponders how to make the box useful*

[BisectedBrioche]

Everyone in this thread finds themself teleported to a manor house in the middle of a seemingly abandoned city. It has foods and medicine and so on, enough to stay alive indefinitely... But ten minutes after we spawn in there are zombies at the gate.

Non-infectious but otherwise they're standard Romero types, a small hoard of them, and more show up every couple of days.

The first inanimate object you see after turning to your left is what you had to fight them off with.

I have... a reasonably heavy walking stick.

A wig stand.

...I guess I could wear the wig for extra head protection and use the stand itself like a polearm?

[Anonymouswizard]

If Peelee or Keltest have a hacksaw and some duct tape I can get the legs off this table and try quad-wielding them. Although they might be better with somebody who already knows how to breakdance.

[Metastachydium]

The first inanimate object you see after turning to your left is what you had to fight them off with.

Heh. He-heh. It's a good thing I read the whole sentence before doing anything. Because guess what is stored to my left in a fashion that leaves it visually perceptible? My battleaxe.

[Fyraltari]

Great. I have an electric radiator and the flower has a battleaxe. That's just great.

[Cazero]

I have a smartphone. I call for backup.

[Anonymouswizard]

Great. I have an electric radiator and the flower has a battleaxe. That's just great.

Hmm... I wonder if I can get this in my signature.

I have a smartphone. I call for backup.

Get your priorities straight.

Order us pizza first, THEN call for backup.

[Fyraltari]

Hmm... I wonder if I can get this in my signature.

Sure, why not?

[Anonymouswizard]

I have ordered a box of Guardsmen and paints. They should arrive in the near future, and hopefully it'll turn out I still have the muscle memory.

[Metastachydium]

Great. I have an electric radiator and the flower has a battleaxe. That's just great.

What should I say? C'est la vie!

Get your priorities straight.

Order us pizza first, THEN call for backup.

SEND MORE PARAMEDICS! SEND MORE COPS!

[Manga Shoggoth]

A plug rack connected to the mains. With a very long cable...

Shocking!

[Form]

Everyone in this thread finds themself teleported to a manor house in the middle of a seemingly abandoned city. It has foods and medicine and so on, enough to stay alive indefinitely... But ten minutes after we spawn in there are zombies at the gate.

Non-infectious but otherwise they're standard Romero types, a small hoard of them, and more show up every couple of days.

The first inanimate object you see after turning to your left is what you had to fight them off with.

I have... a reasonably heavy walking stick.

A pen. I shall write a scathing essay outlining that it is morally wrong to eat brains. Or I would if I also had paper.

I wanted to say that when you declared me the winner, and then again when you said I'm not in second place. I will definitely share the wealth.

You're a lousy dragon, Peelee.

Get your priorities straight.

Order us pizza first, THEN call for backup.

SEND MORE PARAMEDICS! SEND MORE COPS!

I don't know if we've got enough pizza for all of them...

[Anonymouswizard]

A plug rack connected to the mains. With a very long cable...

Shocking!

Badum-tish!

[Peelee]

You're a lousy dragon, Peelee.

Just because dragons traditionally try to hoard wealth, but that just has the pendulum shift towards the peasants mounting crusades to slay the dragons. This could be avoided by having a dragon help share wealth such that there are no peasants, and the dragon would still be able to have a fabulous draconic lifestyle.

I am an excellent dragon.