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  1. - Top - End - #1
    Troll in the Playground
     
    MindFlayer

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    Default Dawn Zealot, feel free to PEACH

    There are those who even the most militant of clergy look upon warily. Individuals who have sold themselves to causes with a fervor that beggars belief. On occasion, one of these fervent faithful may discover a way to unlock the powers of the domains.
    There is no formal training nor organization for Dawn Zealots. Instead, they come from all walks of life with the only trait tying them together being their unswerving devotion to their individual beliefs.

    Hit-Die: d10
    Armor: Light, Medium, Light Shield and Bucklers
    Weapons: Simple and a single Exotic Weapon chosen at first level
    Skill Points: 4
    Skill List
    Str: Climb, Jump, Swim
    Dex: Balance, Tumble
    Con: Concentration
    Int: Knowledge (Religion), Search
    Wis: Listen, Sense Motive, Spot, Survival
    Cha: Bluff, Disguise, Gather Information


    Lvl Base Attack Fort Ref Will Special -1- -2- -3- -4- -5- -6-
    1st +0 +2 +0 +2 Domains, Spellcasting 2 - - - - -
    2nd +1 +3 +0 +3 Bonus Feat 3 - - - - -
    3rd +2 +3 +1 +3 Divine Channeling, Mettle 3 - - - - -
    4th +3 +4 +1 +4 Zeal of Faith 4 2 - - - -
    5th +3 +4 +1 +4 Quick cast 1/day, 3rd Domain 4 3 - - - -
    6th +4 +5 +2 +5 Spell power +2 4 3 - - - -
    7th +5 +5 +2 +5 Bonus Feat 4 4 2 - - -
    8th +6/+1 +6 +2 +6 Zeal of Faith (2nd feat) 4 4 3 - - -
    9th +6/+1 +6 +3 +6 4th Domain 4 4 3 - - -
    10th +7/+2 +7 +3 +7 Quick cast 2/day, Zeal 4 4 4 2 - -
    11st +8/+3 +7 +3 +7 Spell power +3 4 4 4 3 - -
    12nd +9/+4 +8 +4 +8 Bonus Feat, Zeal of Faith (-2) 4 4 4 3 - -
    13rd +9/+4 +8 +4 +8 Divine Channeling (full attack) 4 4 4 4 2 -
    14th +10/+5 +9 +4 +9 5th Domain 4 4 4 4 3 -
    15th +11/+6/+1 +9 +5 +9 Quick cast 3/day 4 4 4 4 3 -
    16th +12/+7/+2 +10 +5 +10 Spell power +4, Zeal of Faith (3rd feat) 5 4 4 4 4 2
    17th +12/+7/+2 +10 +5 +10 Bonus Feat 5 5 4 4 4 3
    18th +13/+8/+3 +11 +6 +11 Spell power +5 5 5 5 4 4 3
    19th +14/+9/+4 +11 +6 +11 6th Domain 5 5 5 5 4 4
    20th +15/+10/+5 +12 +6 +12 Quick cast 4/day, Zeal, Zeal of Faith (-3) 5 5 5 5 5 4

    Domains
    Dawn Zealots begins with the two domains of their choosing, treating their class level as Cleric levels. They gain the benefits of the domain granted powers and add the domains' spell list to their spells known. Dawn Zealots gain an additional domain at levels 5, 9, 14, and 19.

    Spellcasting
    A Dawn Zealot casts divine spells drawn from their domain choices. They can cast any spell they know without preparing ahead of time. Like other spellcasters, a cleric can cast only a certain number of spells of each spell level per day. In addition, they receives bonus spells per day if they have a high Wisdom score.
    To cast a spell, a Dawn Zealot must have a Wisdom score equal to at least 10 + the spell level (Wis 11 for 1st-level spells, Wis 12 for 2nd-level spells, and so forth). The Difficulty Class for a saving throw against a Dawn Zealot's spell is 10 + the spell level + the Dawn Zealot's Wisdom modifier.

    Bonus Feat
    Dawn Zealots receive bonus feats at levels 2, 7, 12, and 17. They must meet all prerequisites to qualify for their feats.

    Divine Channeling
    Beginning at 3rd level, you can use a standard action to cast any touch spell or single-target spell you know and deliver the spell through your weapon with a melee attack. Casting a spell in this manner does not provoke attacks of opportunity. The spell must have a casting time of 1 standard action or less. If the melee attack is successful, the attack deals damage normally; then the effect of the spell is resolved.

    At 13th level, you can cast any touch spell or single-target spell you know as part of a full attack action, and the spell affects each target you hit in melee combat that round. Doing so discharges the spell at the end of the round, in the case of a touch spell that would otherwise last longer than 1 round.

    Mettle
    At 3rd level and higher, a Dawn Zealot can resist magical and unusual attacks with great willpower or fortitude. If they makes a successful Will or Fortitude save against an attack that normally would have a lesser effect on a successful save (such as any spell with a saving throw entry of Will half or Fortitude partial), they instead completely negates the effect. An unconscious or sleeping Dawn Zealot does not gain the benefit of mettle.

    Zeal of Faith
    At 4th level gain a metamagic feat that you meet the prerequisites for. You may apply it to your spells with the slot penalty reduced by 1 a number of times per day equal to your wisdom modifier. The slot penalty reduction is for each spell effected, not per individual feat.
    At 8th and 16th levels an additional metamagic feat may be chosen for this.
    The slot penalty reduction becomes 2 at 12th and 3 at 20th.

    Quick Cast
    Beginning at 5th level, you can cast one spell each day as a swift action, so long as the casting time of the spell is 1 standard action or less. Quick Cast is mutually exclusive in it's effect and cannot be combined with any metamagic.

    You can use this ability twice per day at 10th level, three times per day at 15th level, and four times per day at 20th level.

    Spell Power
    Starting at 6th level, you can more easily overcome the spell resistance of any opponent you successfully injure with a melee attack. If you have injured an opponent with a melee attack, you gain a +2 bonus on your caster level check to overcome spell resistance for the remainder of the encounter. This bonus increases to +3 at 11th level, to +4 at 16th level, and to +5 at 18th level.

    Zeal
    At 10th level a choice must be made between heart and mind.
    Heart: Numerical bonuses to ability scores from spells the Dawn Zealot casts are increased by 50%. At 20th level, the effect is increased to a 100% bonus
    Mind: Spells the Dawn Zealot casts are Empowered without raising the slot level required. At 20th, the effect is increased to a 100% bonus
    Last edited by LairdMaon; 2022-10-15 at 01:38 AM.

  2. - Top - End - #2
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Chimera

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    Default Re: Dawn Zealot, feel free to PEACH

    I’ll post more tomorrow on this but first thought, would make a very good sovereign speaker

    Ok after a reading this class is more or less divine champion (or whatever that accelerated domain casters name is) as a 0-20 class. That’s pretty neat. You’re definitely encouraged to stick with it till 20 to get those extra domains for spontaneous casting. I also recommend anyone playing it to pick up a wand of domain substitution.

    For abilities it’s pretty nice. Mettle is underused. The auto quicken gives some dynamic gameplay. I like it
    Last edited by Jervis; 2022-06-23 at 12:32 PM.

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    Alabenson's Avatar

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    Default Re: Dawn Zealot, feel free to PEACH

    Alright, so starting off with the class concept, this looks to be a divine gish with a focus on using Domains as a spell list. Now, divine gishes have a fair bit of support already, but the Domain-focused aspect is unique enough for a base class that I think it works.
    With regards to the basic class design, any proper class needs to have multiple options to contribute in combat, and at least some way of contributing outside of combat. As a gish, the class naturally is going to have options to use weapon attacks or spells as appropriate, so it’s covered in combat, and the class has sufficient spellcasting ability that I’d say out of combat should be covered too. So the basic class structure looks fine.
    Moving on to abilities, the class looks like its going to want to have either Str or Wis as a primary stat, with Con and either Str or Wis as a secondary stat, and the rest would either be tertiary or dump stats depending on the specifics of the build. I can see the class being a bit more varied in terms of stat distribution depending on the specifics of what someone’s building, but nothing that would push it into the realms of being problematically MAD, so that looks good too.
    Next, I’d want to look at the class role and chassis. The Dawn Zealot looks to be intended as a martial class first and foremost. While it does get 9th level casting, its not going to have a large enough spell list to act as a primary caster. The Dawn Zealot’s chassis looks mostly fine for that, the only remotely questionable bits are the fact that the Dawn Zealot gets 3/4 and that it doesn’t have martial weapon proficiencies. I would say the former issue is less concerning than the latter, given that the class has 9th level casting to make up for the mediocre BaB, and neither issue is particularly significant.

    The class abilities are where I start to see some issues that would need to be addressed.
    Domains/Spellcasting: I have a couple of thoughts here. First, I would add some language specifying that the Dawn Zealot is able to use their Dawn Zealot class level when determining the effects of their Domain’s granted powers. Otherwise, by RAW several domain powers, such as those provided by the Strength and Death domains, would become completely useless since they are based on the character’s Cleric class level. Secondly, I would consider dropping automatically granting the War domain, and just letting the character pick any two domains. This would allow for more flexibility when building characters, and the War domain isn’t necessarily going to be appropriate for every deity. That said, if you did this I would also make two additional changes; granting the class martial weapon proficiency, and drop granting Holy Warrior as a bonus feat (I will go into more detail why I think this is necessary when I get to that).

    Determined Zeal: I don’t really understand the reason for including this ability at all. It looks as though it was based on the Barbarian’s Rage ability, but is both much better and much worse than that ability. Unlike Rage, Determined Zeal doesn’t have any downsides to using it, which eliminates some of the tactical aspects of using it. However, the bonuses offered by Determined Zeal are, by and large, rather mediocre for the Dawn Zealot. The Con bonus is useful and the DR isn’t nothing, but the class has fairly little use for Dex even with only medium armor, and a bonus on Will saves is fairly redundant for a Wisdom-focused class with good Will saves. What I would recommend here is reevaluating what you want this ability to actually accomplish for the class, and adjust the bonuses it grants accordingly.
    Also, the ability lacks any wording on how long it lasts per use, so that would need to be added.

    Divine Channeling: This is another ability that I don’t really fits in with the class as written. The ability relies on the Dawn Zealot having useful touch spells, but there aren’t all that many of those available through Domains. That means that a Dawn Zealot has to choose between being shoehorned into selecting very specific Domains or being unable to use one of their class features. Frankly, I’d probably recommend just dropping this feature and replacing it with something else entirely, given how poorly it works with the mechanics of the rest of the class.

    Zeal of Faith: My main concern here is that metamagic reducers have the potential to become broken very easily. That said, it does have a use per/day limit, which is a good start, but I would add language preventing applying multiple Zeal of Faith reduced metamagics to a single use of the ability, and I’d also recommend disallowing combining Zeal of Faith with Quick Cast. That should tamp down on most of the serious potential abuses.

    Spell Power: I don’t really have any mechanical issues with this ability, but I would suggest changing the name as “Spell Power” frequently refers to a feature offering increased caster level, which could cause some confusion.

    Holy Warrior: I’m going to reiterate what I suggested earlier when discussing Domains and advised dropping this bonus feat altogether. The problem with this feat on the Dawn Zealot as written is that it provides too much for no cost. On a Cleric, the feat requires that the Cleric dedicate one of their two domain slots of a given level to their War domain spell and keep that spell uncast to retain the bonus. This balances the benefit of the feat’s bonus to the cost of A) sacrificing the ability to prepare a different, possibly more useful spell and B) keeping the spell you did prepare uncast. On the other hand, the Dawn Zealot as written receives the feat’s bonuses just for not casting all of their high-level spells, and since they receive both the War Domain and the feat automatically, they don’t even have to pay a cost in terms of build resources.

    Zeal of the Heart: This ability has similar issues to Divine Channeling, in that it relies on the Dawn Zealot selecting some of the very few Domains that actually provide a numerical bonus. I do like the idea for an ability that strengthens the Dawn Zealot’s Domain powers, but I think this ability needs a bit more work.

    Overall, I think this class as a lot of potential, but I’d review how some of the class abilities work together with the Domain-based spellcasting mechanic you’ve set up.
    If brute force isn't working, that just means you're not using enough of it.

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    Troll in the Playground
     
    MindFlayer

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    Default Re: Dawn Zealot, feel free to PEACH

    Thanks for the input, Alabenson!

    I can see how War and Holy Warrior can come off as giving a bit much while also giving too much specific direction. I'll reconsider it, probably overnight.

    Determined Zeal is intended to give a touch of tanky to the class.
    ...
    I just read my own words right there. Yeah, that'll need a refit.

    Divine Channeling is mostly an extra tool for the class. It needn't always be useful, but it's there ready to go if/when the occasion calls for it.

    Good call on the missing language for Zeal of Faith. I'll update that.

    Zeal of the Heart... I kinda turned this into its own unique domain power, didn't I?
    Perhaps if I come up with a couple alternatives. So a Dawn Zealot can choose a "focus".

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    Default Re: Dawn Zealot, feel free to PEACH

    One thought I've had for Divine Channeling is that you could expand it to work with any single-target spell as opposed to just touch spells. That would make the ability useable for most builds without dramatically impacting the feature's power.
    If brute force isn't working, that just means you're not using enough of it.

    When in doubt, set something on fire. If not in doubt, set something on fire anyway.

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    Default Re: Dawn Zealot, feel free to PEACH

    That's both interesting and not broken. Update complete!

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    Person_Man's Avatar

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    Default Re: Dawn Zealot, feel free to PEACH

    Looks excellent. In particular, I think that half casters tend to be painfully underpowered at mid-high levels compared to full casters. And on the flip side, full casters tend to be insanely overpowered at high levels, when each of their spells is capable of winning many encounters, turning D&D into a game of rocket tag. But this class avoids those problems, by having the half-caster progression tuned slightly higher/faster, and bolstered by a very heathy dose of feats, domains, and metamagic. And its all super customizable, but well laid out.

    For me personally though, I don't like the Quick Cast ability. It overlaps with Quicken Spell Metamagic, and any kind of action advantage can quickly break an encounter, turning it into rocket tag. Similarly, I could see some game breaking combos with Zeal of Faith and the Arcane Thesis Feat. Perhaps consider other divine inspired standalone abilities, and one big/cool 20th level capstone instead of a piling up a bunch of medium sized ones.

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    Ogre in the Playground
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    Default Re: Dawn Zealot, feel free to PEACH

    In case the thread is somehow not locked, I'll point out that the Domain feature could be better phrased as "Dawn Zealots begins with the two domains of their choosing, treating their class level as Cleric levels", the Heart option of Zeal could be better phrased as "Numerical bonuses to ability scores from spells the Dawn Zealot casts are increased by 50%. At 20th level, the effect is increased to a 100% bonus", and the Mind option could be better phrased as "Spells the Dawn Zealot casts are Empowered without raising the slot level required. At 20th, the effect is increased to a 100% bonus"

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    Troll in the Playground
     
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    Default Re: Dawn Zealot, feel free to PEACH

    Thank you, Morphic Tide. I took your advice and updated the wording.

    Quote Originally Posted by Person_Man View Post
    For me personally though, I don't like the Quick Cast ability. It overlaps with Quicken Spell Metamagic, and any kind of action advantage can quickly break an encounter, turning it into rocket tag. Similarly, I could see some game breaking combos with Zeal of Faith and the Arcane Thesis Feat. Perhaps consider other divine inspired standalone abilities, and one big/cool 20th level capstone instead of a piling up a bunch of medium sized ones.
    I've been considering this. I almost directly stole Quick Cast from Duskblade. I'm debating what else could replace it. Also thinking I might move Zeal from level 20 to 19. That would make room for a solid capstone, though I'm at a loss what to do for that.

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    Pixie in the Playground
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    Default Re: Dawn Zealot, feel free to PEACH

    Quote Originally Posted by LairdMaon View Post
    I've been considering this. I almost directly stole Quick Cast from Duskblade. I'm debating what else could replace it. Also thinking I might move Zeal from level 20 to 19. That would make room for a solid capstone, though I'm at a loss what to do for that.
    Quick Cast could be replaced by casting from off spell list (either from an unchosen domain and/or the cleric list). You could also continue the spell pattern to give 7th level spells at 19th and 20th levels. I personally think that a bunch of progressing abilities all improving at 20th is a valid capstone, but if you don't like that maybe a 1/day activated ability that for 1 minute allows Quick Casting, expanded spell list, full attacking as a standard action, unlimited turn attempts to power any divine feat (possibly gaining a divine feat in case they don't have one), or some other martial/divine ability that fits with the class and isn't overpowered to have for 1 minute 1/day at 20th level.

    Also, if Zeal of Faith is used with a metamagic feat with less then 3 adjustment how does the adjustment work? Is it to a minimum of spell level? If Zeal of Faith (Still, -2) and Still (level 2) a level 2 or level 1 slot? Is (Still, Silent) (level 2) a level 3 or level 2 slot?

    Also also, does proficiency with light shields imply proficiency with bucklers? Not to mention the lack of Diplomacy as a class skill kind of makes sense, but the lack of Intimidate less so (though I suppose they can still put ranks in it).

    Simple weapons is kind of limited for a more martial class, you could give them proficiency in one martial weapon (something I've seen and used a lot) though proficiency isn't necessarily that important. This might have been an oversight from when the War domain was mandatory and thus the deity's favored weapon was automatically handed proficiency and Weapon Focus.

    Overall, a very nice class, a good divine counterpart to the duskblade in a way that doesn't step on the paladin's, ranger's, or other divine gish's toes. One of the things people sometimes forget about in a class (or magic system, or homebrew in general) is the importance of elegance, and this class manages to retain that while still providing depth.

  11. - Top - End - #11
    Troll in the Playground
     
    MindFlayer

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    Default Re: Dawn Zealot, feel free to PEACH

    Quote Originally Posted by Halrax View Post
    Quick Cast could be replaced by casting from off spell list (either from an unchosen domain and/or the cleric list). You could also continue the spell pattern to give 7th level spells at 19th and 20th levels. I personally think that a bunch of progressing abilities all improving at 20th is a valid capstone, but if you don't like that maybe a 1/day activated ability that for 1 minute allows Quick Casting, expanded spell list, full attacking as a standard action, unlimited turn attempts to power any divine feat (possibly gaining a divine feat in case they don't have one), or some other martial/divine ability that fits with the class and isn't overpowered to have for 1 minute 1/day at 20th level.
    For now, I'm sticking with it as-is. Give it a playtest and see how it feels. If it doesn't work out, I'll definitely sift through your ideas to see what feels more appropriate. Thank you!

    Quote Originally Posted by Halrax View Post
    Also, if Zeal of Faith is used with a metamagic feat with less then 3 adjustment how does the adjustment work? Is it to a minimum of spell level? If Zeal of Faith (Still, -2) and Still (level 2) a level 2 or level 1 slot? Is (Still, Silent) (level 2) a level 3 or level 2 slot?
    It would absolutely be too a minimum of the spell's level. That why the text specifies affecting the penalty from the feat as opposed to the spell level.

    Quote Originally Posted by Halrax View Post
    Also also, does proficiency with light shields imply proficiency with bucklers? Not to mention the lack of Diplomacy as a class skill kind of makes sense, but the lack of Intimidate less so (though I suppose they can still put ranks in it).
    I'll update it to show light shields and bucklers.

    Quote Originally Posted by Halrax View Post
    Simple weapons is kind of limited for a more martial class, you could give them proficiency in one martial weapon (something I've seen and used a lot) though proficiency isn't necessarily that important. This might have been an oversight from when the War domain was mandatory and thus the deity's favored weapon was automatically handed proficiency and Weapon Focus.
    I was thinking of completely skipping martial weapons and adding a single exotic weapon proficiency. Just another aspect of their non-standard origins.

    Quote Originally Posted by Halrax View Post
    Overall, a very nice class, a good divine counterpart to the duskblade in a way that doesn't step on the paladin's, ranger's, or other divine gish's toes. One of the things people sometimes forget about in a class (or magic system, or homebrew in general) is the importance of elegance, and this class manages to retain that while still providing depth.

    To humbly misquote Shrek:
    "Donkey[Me]: All right, I hope you heard that? She called me[my class] a 'noble steed[elegant].' She thinks I'm[my class] a steed[is elegant]."

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