Tzardok's Miscellaneous Homebrew Repository

[Metastachydium]

Here a little thing inspired by folklore from the alps.

Well, it really is little! (Bhu had a version of it relatively recently; that one was an Animal-type cryptid commonly mistaken for a Dragon, though.)

New Creature: Tatzelwurm
Small dragon

Amor Class: 16 (+3 Dex, +1 size, +2 natural), touch 13, Flat footed 14

T 14, FF 13.

Skills: Hide +10, Jump +8, Move Silently +10, Spot +9, Swim +9

Don't forget the size bonus to Hide! Should be +14 with it. (Also, could you add that usual Skills thing with the effects of the swim speed to the description? I'm totally not asking because I forgot it has a swim speed and thought you overexpended the skill budget at first.)

Feats: Ability Focus (Breath Weapon), Multi-Attack, Spring Attack (B)

Bonus Spring Attack, Pounce, three naturals and it's a playable Small thing that likes to Hide? This sounds like a chassis for precision damage!

When a tatzelwurm attacks or wants to intimidate a creature, it produces a shrill whistling.

I was wondering why a weird looking ambush predator with a difficult, less than sociable personality would have CHA as its best score, and this would help explain that… If it were an ability. Or a racial bonus to Intimidate. Or Intimidate were, at least, on the skill list. Hm.

Tatzelwürmer have a strange liking for milk, especially cow milk, and often attack herds of cattle to drain their udders.

Go weird folklore critter doing weird folklore things! AVENGE MY KIN!

Tatzelwürmer speak Draconian

Still called Draconic!

[Tzardok]

Well, it really is little! (Bhu had a version of it relatively recently; that one was an Animal-type cryptid commonly mistaken for a Dragon, though.)

Yes, I saw it when I was nearly finished and thought for a moment wether I should abandon the project. I decided against it.

There have been tatzelwurm sightings in Switzerland, Austria, Bavaria and Italy for five hundred years, with the story apparantly being derived from older stories about fights against dragons and linnorms, and the sightings have been getting progressively smaller and less fantastic over the centuries. They practically flow from mythic being to cryptid with no clear delineation.

T 14, FF 13.

Fixed.

Don't forget the size bonus to Hide! Should be +14 with it. (Also, could you add that usual Skills thing with the effects of the swim speed to the description? I'm totally not asking because I forgot it has a swim speed and thought you overexpended the skill budget at first.)

Fixed.

I was wondering why a weird looking ambush predator with a difficult, less than sociable personality would have CHA as its best score, and this would help explain that… If it were an ability. Or a racial bonus to Intimidate. Or Intimidate were, at least, on the skill list. Hm.

I originally wanted them to have Frightful Presence, but that looked kinda silly on such a small thing, and forgot to replace it with anything. I'll think about it. I also imagine it as having a very healthy, nearly over-developed ego (which I forgot to write into the description. Fixed).
I just noticed that I also forgot to include the color scheme.

Go weird folklore critter doing weird folklore things! AVENGE MY KIN!

You wouldn't believe how many stories there are about snakes and dragons sneaking into cattle herds and sucking the udders dry without anybody noticing. I couldn't not include it. It also fits with old stories about dragons and linnorms really liking milk and demanding tribute in form of gallons of the stuff.
Therefore, and to strengthen the connection between linnorms and tatzelwürmern, I'll declare that linnorms also really love milk. (I don't know who originally came up with the "tatzelwürmer are linnorm larvae" stuff, but I really like it.)

Still called Draconic!

§%&$!

[Metastachydium]

Yes, I saw it when I was nearly finished and thought for a moment wether I should abandon the project. I decided against it.

There have been tatzelwurm sightings in Switzerland, Austria, Bavaria and Italy for five hundred years, with the story apparantly being derived from older stories about fights against dragons and linnorms, and the sightings have been getting progressively smaller and less fantastic over the centuries. They practically flow from mythic being to cryptid with no clear delineation.

Heh. A right call has been made!

I originally wanted them to have Frightful Presence, but that looked kinda silly on such a small thing, and forgot to replace it with anything. I'll think about it. I also imagine it as having a very healthy, nearly over-developed ego (which I forgot to write into the description. Fixed).
I just noticed that I also forgot to include the color scheme.

Ah, I see! I do that a lot too, with high CHA as a shorthand for 'it's cute' or high WIS to say 'vigilant to the point of paranoia'. That said, spooky noises special attacks are a thing. You could actually have it whistle scarily if you wanted it to!

You wouldn't believe how many stories there are about snakes and dragons sneaking into cattle herds and sucking the udders dry without anybody noticing. I couldn't not include it. It also fits with old stories about dragons and linnorms really liking milk and demanding tribute in form of gallons of the stuff.
Therefore, and to strengthen the connection between linnorms and tatzelwürmern, I'll declare that linnorms also really love milk. (I don't know who originally came up with the "tatzelwürmer are linnorm larvae" stuff, but I really like it.)

Colossal Dread Linnorm: [Crashes through the tavern wall as though it were tissue paper.] A BUCKET OF MILK, IF YOU WILL, STOUT YEOMAN!

§%&$!

[EVIL laughter!!]

[Tzardok]

Ah, I see! I do that a lot too, with high CHA as a shorthand for 'it's cute' or high WIS to say 'vigilant to the point of paranoia'. That said, spooky noises special attacks are a thing. You could actually have it whistle scarily if you wanted it to!

Added the Shrill Scare special attack. Also shifted the skill points from Spot to Intimidate and gave it some racial boni to Intimidate and Jump.

Colossal Dread Linnorm: [Crashes through the tavern wall as though it were tissue paper.] A BUCKET OF MILK, IF YOU WILL, STOUT YEOMAN!

I imagine it more like: "I'll devastate the whole kingdom unless you sacrifice every day 100 barrels of milk to me! PER CAPITA! MUAHAHA!"


Something completely different: I recently returned to the Fate franchise because the fan-translation of Fate/Extra CCC was finally finished (I've been waiting for that for years). And now I'm wondering about maybe making brewing some stuff from there. Are you familiar with Fate?

[Metastachydium]

Added the Shrill Scare special attack. Also shifted the skill points from Spot to Intimidate and gave it some racial boni to Intimidate and Jump.

Shrill Scare (Su): A tatzelwurm's shrill whistling is disproportinally horrifying. As a Swift Action, the tatzelwurm can let loose a piercing whistle that causes all creatures except for other dragons within 30 ft that can hear the tatzelwurm to be shaken for 2d6 rounds, unless they manage a Will save (DC 15). A creature that suceeds on its save is immune to that tatzelwurm's Shrill Scare for 24 hours.
Skills: A tatzelwurm has +4 racial bonus to Intimidate and Jump checks.
This is a sonic mind-affecting fear effect.

2d6 rounds? That thing means business, but I like it! Just make sure to move the underlined bit to where it belongs (unless it has a mind-affecting Jump, which would be badass, if weird).

I imagine it more like: "I'll devastate the whole kingdom unless you sacrifice every day 100 barrels of milk to me! PER CAPITA! MUAHAHA!"

Well, my version was likely to end with lots of wights and a "WHAT A SENSELESS WASTE OF HUMANOID LIFE" quip as well, but yeah. Linnorms are creeps, and know how to think big.

Are you familiar with Fate?

As a philosophical concept, yes. As a franchise, I've heard weird things, but otherwise less so.

[enderlord99]

When you mention a videogame franchise called "Fate" do you mean the one by Imageepoch or the one by Wildtangent?

[Tzardok]

2d6 rounds? That thing means business, but I like it! Just make sure to move the underlined bit to where it belongs (unless it has a mind-affecting Jump, which would be badass, if weird).

Too much? I thought a minute was too long, and a round too short, and then decided to go for random.

Well, my version was likely to end with lots of wights and a "WHAT A SENSELESS WASTE OF HUMANOID LIFE" quip as well, but yeah. Linnorms are creeps, and know how to think big.

I'd say they think exactly the right size for their bodies. Goddamit, Rennbuu! That was supposed to stay blue!

As a philosophical concept, yes. As a franchise, I've heard weird things, but otherwise less so.

It does have its idiosyncracies, yes. Even beyond the meme-y stuff, it was made by a philosopher in a completely different language. But the underlying metaphysics can be quite interesting, if you manage to get beyond the fanon and the mistranslations. Of course, I've fallen very behind, but I try to catch up.

When you mention a videogame franchise called "Fate" do you mean the one by Imageepoch or the one by Wildtangent?

Huh, I didn't know that Imageepoch made Fate/Extra. I never heard of either company before.

The franchise is by a guy named Nasu Kinoko and his company Type-Moon and includes Visual Novels like Fate/Stay Night, anime like Fate/Zero or The Case Files of Lord El-Melloi, or the gacha game Fate/Grand Order. I think they outsourced Fate/Extra to Imageepoch.

[Metastachydium]

Too much? I thought a minute was too long, and a round too short, and then decided to go for random.

On the "much" side, yes, but nothing to really worry about. I think it's fine.

Rennbuu

I must ask at this point. Why are you lugging a Slaad Lord about?!

It does have its idiosyncracies, yes. Even beyond the meme-y stuff, it was made by a philosopher in a completely different language. But the underlying metaphysics can be quite interesting, if you manage to get beyond the fanon and the mistranslations. Of course, I've fallen very behind, but I try to catch up.

Hm. Well, I'm unlikely to pick up any reference you make, but don't let that stop you.

[Tzardok]

I must ask at this point. Why are you lugging a Slaad Lord about?!

Be honest. If a slaad lord decided to spend time with you, could you drive him off? I'm not Primus.

[Metastachydium]

Eh, that's fair. Just make sure you keep your alcohol intake in check. You said this one attracts the implanting-happy sort of its folk.

[Tzardok]

Eh, that's fair. Just make sure you keep your alcohol intake in check. You said this one attracts the implanting-happy sort of its folk.

Don't worry. I'm a teetotaler. I'm totally into tea.

Now after that little joke, I'd like to post the results of a project I've been working on (no, not the big one; that one's on ice for the moment) since the talk about Elemental Wood inspired me. I hope people will like it and that the epic one actually does its flavour text justice. So without further ado, I present:

Fauna of Flora

Zurrzirr
Large Vermin (Extraplanar)
Hit Dice: 5d8+15 (37 hp)
Initiative: +5
Speed: 10 ft. (2 squares), Fly 50 ft. (Good)
Amor Class: 18 (-1 Size, +5 Dex, +4 natural), touch 14, Flat footed 13
Base Attack/Grapple: +3/+9
Attack: Claw melee +4 (1d6+2)
Full Attack: Two claws melee +4 (1d6+2)
Space/Reach: 10 ft./5 ft.
Special Attacks: Cloud of pollen
Special Qualities: Darkvision 60 ft., vermin traits
Saves: Fort +7, Ref +6, Will +1
Abilities: Str 15, Dex 21, Con 16, Int -, Wis 10, Cha 2
Skills: Spot +5
Feats: -
Environment: Elemental Plane of Wood, Elemental Plane of Air
Organisation: Solitary or pack (5-8)
Challenge Rating: 4
Treasure: None
Alignment: Always neutral
Advancement: 6-10 HD (large); 11-20 HD (huge)
Level Adjustment: +1

The zurrzirr is an insect that adapted to the air space of Wood, but can also be found in Air. They prefer the border region called the Blooming Reaches where they bath in the blooms, yet their travels may lead them anywhere on the two planes (and rarely beyond) where large enough flowers bloom to be pollinated by them.
In appearance, a zurrzirr resembles a cross between a dragonfly and a scorpion, with only two pairs of legs and four pairs of wings. Two claws, somewhere between a scorpion's pincers and a mantis' forelegs, serve as its weapon of defense. The buzzing of its many wings gives the zurrzirr its name. Zurrzirrs are practically always covered in a thick layer of pollen. When agitated, it shakes the pollen loose with nervous wingbeats and shrouds itself into a cloud of pollen.
Zurrzirrs are nectar drinkers. Their preferred flowers are those large enough that they can practically bath in them, covering themselves with pollen of all kind while sucking up the nectar at the ground. Zurrzirrs are usually solitary, but from packs if food is plentyful. As the Elemental Planes don't have seasons, zurrzirr matings don't happen periodical. Instead the formation of a pack triggers the mating instincts. Zurrzirr matings are preceded by acrobatic flight displays. After mating, the female lays sticky clumps of eggs at the undersides of the leaves of their food trees. The eggs hatch within two weeks and the nymphs, who are vegetarious, grow to full size and winged state within three months. Zurrzirrs live up to three years, less when mating often.

Cloud of Pollen (Ex): When irritated or endangered, the zurrzirr stirrs up its pollen and forms a cloud with a radius of 20 ft. around itself. Any creature in the cloud enjoys concealment (20 %), except against the attacks of zurrzirrs, as their sight is not inhibited by the cloud. Any creature with lungs that needs to breath except zurrzirrs must make a Fortitude save against DC 15 on their turn. If they fail, they lose their action for that round as they are too busy sneezing, coughing and crying from swollen eyes.
The DC is based on Con.
Skills: A zurrzirr's large eyes grant it a racial bonus of +5 to Spot.


Soil Diver (Template)
Sometimes the result of magical crossbreeding, sometimes caused by living in locations that feel the touch of Elemental Earth, and sometimes born through random magical mutation, soil divers are land-dwelling variants of usually aquatic creatures. These beings live in the ground, treating it just like the water others of their kind live in. Some theorize that the bulette is descended from a soil diver version of a shark before evolving into something different.
Soil divers tend to look less aquatic than the normal versions, with reptilian scales or mole-like fur where fish scales, slimy skin or a seal's coat were before. Similiarily, fins and crests become stubby clawed legs and ridges.

Creating a soil diver
„Soil diver“ is an inherited template that can be added to any aberation, animal, dragon, magical beast, monstrous humanoid or vermin with a Swim speed, but no Burrow speed. The soil diver uses all the base creatures statistics and special abilities except as noted here.
Size and type: Animals and vermin with this template become magical beasts, but creature types remain unchanged otherwise. Remove the Aquatic subtype. If the base creature has the Water subtype, replace it with the Earth subtype.
Speed: Soil divers lose their Swim speed, but can burrow at the same speed. Soil divers with no base land speed gain one of 5 ft. Unlike other burrowing creatures, soil divers can run while burrowing, but only in very light and soft earth light soil or sand.
Special Qualities: A soil diver retains all the special qualities of the base creature (except for Amphibious) and additionally gains Tremorsense 60 ft. If the base creature has a sensory ability (like Darkvision, Blindsense or Blindsight) at a higher range, use that range instead for the Tremorsense.
Abilities: Alter from the base creature as follows: Dex -2. Burrowing through earth requires less flexible muscles than swimming.
Environment: Change to plains or hills, but keep temperatur. Soil divers are also common in Mother Soil, the border between Wood and Earth, and a bit less common elsewhere in Elemental Earth.
Challenge Rating: +0
Level Adjustment: +0


Genie, Shengzhang
Large Outsider (Air, Earth, Extraplanar, Fire, Water) or (Extraplanar, Wood)
Hit Dice: 7d8+21 (52 hp)
Initiative: +7
Speed: 20 ft. (4 squares), Fly 60 ft. (Perfect)
Amor Class: 20 (-1 Size, +3 Dex, +4 natural, +4 ironwood chain shirt), touch 12, Flat footed 17
Base Attack/Grapple: +7/+16
Attack: Slam melee +11 (1d8+5) or spike ranged +10 (1d6+5, 3x)
Full Attack: Two slams melee +11 (1d8+5) or four spikes ranged +10 (1d6+5, 3x)
Space/Reach: 10 ft./10 ft.
Special Attacks: Calm weather, spell-like abilities, spikes
Special Qualities: Darkvision 60 ft., immunity to acid and poison, planeshift, resistence 10 to electricity and sonic, telepathy 100 ft., woodland stride, woodsense 60 ft.
Saves: Fort +8, Ref +8, Will +10
Abilities: Str 21, Dex 17, Con 16, Int 11, Wis 16, Cha 14
Skills: Craft (any) +10 or Profession (any) +13, Concentrate +13, Diplomacy +14, Knowledge (any one) +10, Listen +13, Sense Motive +13, Spellcraft +10, Spot +13
Feats: Combat Casting, Improved Initiative^B, Iron Will, Weapon Focus (Spike)
Environment: Elemental Plane of Wood
Organisation: Solitary, company (2-4) or band (6-15)
Challenge Rating: 7
Treasure: Standard
Alignment: Always neutral good
Advancement: 8-14 HD (large), 15-21 HD (huge)
Level Adjustment: +5

The Shengzhang, the genies of Wood, are of generally peaceful nature and probably the most benevolent of all genies in regard to mortals. This may be because of their general obscurity and a quirk of their ability to fulfill wishes that makes them relatively uninteresting to the kind of people who routinely try to enslave genies: their wishes simply fail if they aren't used for selfless and benevolent purposes.
A typical Shengzhang stands 10 ft tall and wears hanfu-style robes and a turban or a veil. His face seems to be covered with a scary wooden mask, but this mask actually is his face and moves nearly as fluid as one made of flesh. Male shengzhang have wild and bristly beards.
A Shengzhang speaks Common, Sylvan, Celestial, Aquan and one other elemental language.

Calm Weather (Sp): A Shengzhang can exert control over the weather to calm storms and placate the elements. This ability works similiar to control weather cast by a druid at 12th caster level, except it is used as a standard action, the weather changes within one round instead of 10 minutes, and it can't create inclement weather or worsen current situations. Storms can be calmed, heat cooled, cold warmed, rain reduced to pleasant showers, burning sun covered by clouds and wind reduced to a refreshing breeze. Calm weather is the equivalent to a 6th level spell and can be used once per day.
Calm weather dispells any active spells, powers etc of 6th level or lower in the area that manipulate weather or create wind automatically. Effects of higher level are dispelled if the Shengzhang succeedes at a dispelling check against the effect.
Planeshift (Sp): Like all genies, a Shengzhang can enter any of the elemental planes, the Astral Plane, or the Material Plane. This ability transports the genie and up to eight other creatures, provided they all link hands with the genie. It is otherwise similar to the spell of the same name (caster level 13th).
Spell-like abilities: At will – backbiter^SC (DC 13), comand plants (DC 16), detect magic, entangle (DC 13), invisibility (self only), plant growth; 3/day – antilife shell, heroes' feast, iron wood, wood shape; 1/day – divination; 1/week – limited wish (only to non-genies). 12th caster level.
Spikes (Ex): A Shengzhang can grow and shoot large wooden splinters from its arms. This is a ranged attack with a maximum range of 120 ft and no range increments. These spikes deal 1d6 + Str-Mod base damage and have a critical multiplier of 3x (if the shengzhang's size changes, the damage dice changes with it). It can shoot up to four spikes per round.
Woodsense (Su): A Shengzhang is automatically aware of any creature within 60 ft that touches any kind of vegetation and can pinpoint their location.

Society of the Shengzhang
During the War of Law and Chaos, the Shengzhang served from the backlines by growing alchemical ingredients, good food to keep up morale and other plant based ressources for the war effort. Their role nowadays is similiar, often selling and sometimes gifting their plant products to other genie societies. Especially the Great Padisha of the Marids receives a yearly tribute from the Shengzhang Empire, as they fear the Marids' great power and capricious nature while at the same time believing Water to be the most necessary of the other elements. The Marids in turn consider them an uninteresting vasal state.
The best relationship exists between Djinn and Shengzhang. Both genie races like and respect each other and often engage in trade. Shengzhang and Qorrashi have a cool, but cordial affiliation with each other; Shengzhang and Erimish are united in mutual respect, but don't actually care for or need the other's services or talents; and between Shengzhang and Dao exists mutual scorn. Efreet are avoided by Shenzhang and consider them and their realm to be beneath their notice in return, Surreshi complain too much for the Shengzhang's taste, and Jann are in their mind pitiable cousins who obviously represent a less stable mixture of the four elements than the superior Shengzhang.
The Shengzhang Empire is the largest and most influential society on Elemental Wood and mostly made up of provinces that are given a large amount of independence, but are also expected to come together for each other's or the Empire's benefit. A province is ruled by a noble who bears the title Gong. The Gong have the right through majority to depose the emperor, the Huangdi, if they feel he or she doesn't rule wisely enough anymore, and choose a new one amongst themselves; a right that have only made use of once since the War of Law and Chaos ended.
The current Huangdi is Xunmei Fatimah Nasu Daling, Matriarch of Bloom, Mistress of the World Tree, Souvereign Over All That Grows, The Multiverse's Cornucopia, Fruitful Provider, Commander of Vine and Thorn, and so on and so forth, and rules her Empire from the City of Teak, where the Paradisical Palace serves as the centre of her rule. The Huangdi is a severe, but not unkind woman whose main indulgence is displays of temperance and who is open to honest pleas for help from visitors.


Gronkh
Medium monstrous Humanoid (Extraplanar, Fire)
Hit Dice: 7d8+21 (52 hp)
Initiative: +6
Speed: 30 ft. (6 squares), Burrow 15 ft, Climb 20 ft.
Amor Class: 18 (+2 Dex, +6 natural), touch 12, Flat footed 16
Base Attack/Grapple: +7/+11
Attack: Heavy pick melee +11 (1d6+6/x4) or dart ranged +9 (1d4+4)
Full Attack: Heavy pick melee +11/+6 (1d6+6/x4) or dart ranged +9/+4 (1d4+4)
Space/Reach: 5 ft./5 ft.
Special Attacks: Smoulder
Special Qualities: Darkvision 60 ft., DR 5/piercing, immunity to fire, vulnerability to cold
Saves: Fort +5, Ref +7, Will +6
Abilities: Str 18, Dex 15, Con 16, Int 15, Wis 9, Cha 16
Skills: Climb +22, Diplomacy +13, Sleight of Hand +12, Survival +9
Feats: Improved Initative, Iron Will, Power Attack, Snatch Arrows^B
Environment: Elemental Plane of Wood, Elemental Plane of Fire
Organisation: Solitairy, pair or gang (3-6)
Challenge Rating: 5
Treasure: Double standard
Alignment: Usually chaotic good
Advancement: 8-14 HD (medium); 15-21 HD (large)
Level Adjustment: +2?

Gronkhs are a race of good-natured beings that mostly inhabit the Smoldering, the border of Elemental Wood and Elemental Fire, where the matter of Wood has burned to large masses of charcoal.
A gronkh is a 5 ½ foot high humanoid with the long arms and short legs of an ape. Their skin is ash grey, but covered in most places by spiky growths of coal that make them look demonic and intimidating, an impression that quickly disappears after talking to these excitable and distractable creatures. Gronkh mostly feed on charcoal, but can survive on rock coal. They supplement their diet with smoked meat and vegetables.
Gronkhs are playful and sociable. They love to climb, to throw and catch darts at each other, to make jokes and pranks, to build stuff from blocks they hew from the coal, and to play puzzle and riddle games with each other or visitors. Because of their inattentive nature, they tend to miss clues, meaning that they often lose to others, but they take that with humor.
A gronkh speaks Ignan, Common and Orc.

Smoulder (Su): A gronkh can as a Swift Action cause the coal covering its body to smoulder and glow. While this happens, any creature that attacks the gronkh in melee (except those using reach weapons) and any creature the gronkh hits with its melee weapons (again, not when using reach weapons) takes 1d6 fire damage. Furthermore, the gronkh produces a veil of smoke that gives it concealment. A gronkh can smoulder for up to 20 rounds per day. Deactivating this ability is a Swift Action.
Skill: Gronkhs have a +8 racial bonus on Climb checks and can always choose to take 10 on Climb checks, even if rushed or threatened.


Leafy Sea Serpent
Leafy sea serpents are the smallest and most cowardly of sea serpents (see Dragon #345). These highly specialized ambush predators are covered with leaf-like appendages that make them seem like floating masses of water plants. They let victims come close and then blind them with their breath weapon, rendering them helpless against their sudden strikes. When this strategy fails, they often flee and hide to try anew.
Their adaptation to water plants meant that they prefered to live closer to land than other sea serpents, and this left them in a precarious position when the larger and deeper living sea serpents gathered to eradicate them. Caught between the hostile dry land and their enemies' turf, the leafy sea serpents evaded their extinction by collectively fleeing to the Inner Planes. Nowadays leafy sea serpents are mostly extinct on the Material; most of them dwell in the Swaying Forest, the infinite forest of seagrass that lies on Water's side of the border between Water and Wood, with some groups dwelling in Water proper and others instead on Wood's side of the border, in the brackish water of the giant mangrove known as the Stilting Roots.
Leafy sea serpents are usually Lawful Evil.

Spoiler: Tables

Show

Age	Size	HD	Str	Dex	Con	Int	Wis	Cha	BAB/Grapple	Attack	Fort	Ref	Will	Breath Weapon (DC)	Frightful Presence	CR
Wyrmling	T	3d12+3 (22 hp)	7	14	13	10	14	7	+3/-7	+3	+4	+5	+5	1d4 (12)	—	2
Very young	S	6d12+12 (51 hp)	9	14	15	10	16	9	+6/+1	+6	+7	+7	+8	2d4 (15)	—	3
Young	M	9d12+18 (68 hp)	13	14	15	12	16	9	+9/+10	+10	+8	+8	+9	3d4 (16)	—	5
Juvenile	M	12d12+36 (114 hp)	15	14	17	12	18	11	+12/+14	+14	+11	+10	+12	4d4 (19)	—	7
Young adult	L	15d12+45 (142 hp)	17	14	17	14	18	11	+15/+23	+17	+12	+11	+13	5d4 (20)	17	9
Adult	L	18d12+72 (189 hp)	19	14	19	14	20	13	+18/+26	+21	+15	+13	+16	6d4 (23)	20	11
Mature adult	H	21d12+105 (241 hp)	23	14	21	16	20	13	+21/+35	+25	+17	+14	+17	7d4 (25)	21	12
Old	H	24d12+120 (276 hp)	25	14	21	16	22	15	+24/+39	+29	+19	+16	+20	8d4 (27)	24	14
Very old	H	27d12+162 (337 hp)	27	14	23	18	22	15	+27/+43	+33	+21	+17	+21	9d4 (29)	25	16
Ancient	H	30d12+180 (375 hp)	29	14	23	18	24	17	+30/+47	+37	+23	+19	+24	10d4 (31)	28	17
Wyrm	G	33d12+231 (445 hp)	33	14	25	20	24	17	+33/+56	+40	+25	+20	+25	11d4 (33)	29	19
Great wyrm	G	36d12+288 (522 hp)	35	14	27	20	26	19	+36/+60	+44	+28	+22	+28	12d4 (36)	32	21

Age	Speed	Initiative	AC	Special abilities	SR
Wyrmling	40 ft., swim 70 ft.	+2	16 (+2 size, +2 natural, +2 Dex)	Water subtype, Immunity to Poison, Leafy Outline, Sudden Strike +1d6	—
Very young	40 ft., swim 70 ft.	+2	18 (+1 size, +5 natural, +2 Dex)	Poison	—
Young	40 ft., swim 80 ft.	+2	20 (+8 natural, +2 Dex)	Sudden Strike +2d6	—
Juvenile	40 ft., swim 80 ft.	+2	23 (+11 natural, +2 Dex)		—
Young adult	40 ft., swim 90 ft.	+2	25 (-1 size, +14 natural, +2 Dex)	DR 5/Magic, Sudden Strike +3d6	12
Adult	40 ft., swim 90 ft.	+2	28 (-1 size, +17 natural, +2 Dex)	Light footSC	14
Mature adult	40 ft., swim 90 ft.	+2	30 (-2 size, +20 natural, +2 Dex)	DR 10/Magic, Sudden Strike +4d6	16
Old	40 ft., swim 100 ft.	+2	33 (-2 size, +23 natural, +2 Dex)		18
Very old	40 ft., swim 100 ft.	+2	36 (-2 size, +26 natural, +2 Dex)	DR 15/Magic, Sudden Strike +5d6	20
Ancient	40 ft., swim 110 ft.	+2	39 (-2 size, +29 natural, +2 Dex)	veil of shadowMH	22
Wyrm	40 ft., swim 110 ft.	+2	40 (-4 size, +32 natural, +2 Dex)	DR 20/Magic, Sudden Strike +6d6	24
Great wyrm	40 ft., swim 120 ft.	+2	43 (-4 size, +35 natural, +2 Dex)	Ferocity of the Sanguine RageDrMa	26

Breath Weapon (Su): A leafy sea serpent's breath weapon is a cone of black acidic liquid that attacks the eyes. Any creature in the cone takes the indicated acid damage und must make a Fortitude save to avoid being blinded for 1 minute. This ability counts as poison; neutralize poison restores the sight, and abilities that protect against poison (like a dwarf's racial bonus to saves) apply agains the blindness.
Leafy Outline (Ex): While in brackisch water and water full of kelp, sea grass and other aquatic plants, a leafy sea serpent receives a +10 circumstance bonus to Hide and ignores size penalties to Hide.
Skills: Leafy sea serpents have Hide, Move Silently, Survival and Swim as additional class skills.


Malum Malum
Medium Magical Beast (Extraplanar)
Hit Dice: 12d10+36 (102 hp)
Initiative: +5
Speed: 40 ft. (8 squares), Climb 20 ft.
Amor Class: 22 (+5 Dex, +7 natural), touch 15, Flat footed 17
Base Attack/Grapple: +12/+15
Attack: Bite melee +17 (1d6+3)
Full Attack: Bite melee +17 (1d6+3) and two claws melee +15 (1d4+1)
Space/Reach: 5 ft./5 ft.
Special Attacks: Apple of discord, apple of wisdom
Special Qualities: Darkvision 60 ft., lesser plant traits, low-light vision, negative vulnerability, positive adaptation, resistence 10 to electricity and fire, scent
Saves: Fort +11, Ref +13, Will +7
Abilities: Str 17, Dex 21, Con 17, Int 16, Wis 16, Cha 17
Skills: Bluff +21, Climb +26, Hide +20, Move Silently +20, Sense Motive +18
Feats: Ability Focus (Apple of Discord), Dodge, Multiattack, Skill Focus (Bluff), Weapon Finesse
Environment: Elemental Plane of Wood, Positive Energy Plane
Organisation: Solitary, pair or bushel (3-5)
Challenge Rating: 8
Treasure: No coins, standard goods, standard items
Alignment: Always chaotic evil
Advancement: 13-22 HD (medium); 23-30 HD (large)
Level Adjustment: +5

The malum malum (plural: mala mala) is a malevolent inhabitant of the Cornucopia, the border between Elemental Wood and the Positive Energy Plane, where the plants overflow with fruit of all kind.
A malum malum resembles a snake with legs. Leaves cover most of its torso, between which fruits looking like ruby-red apples grow. A typical malum malum is between 4 and 7 ft long.
The mala mala are beings without any negative energy in their metaphysical make-up. This makes them immortal and immune to age and mundane sicknesses. As a result, they look down on most other living beings, who are „contaminated with negative energy“ in their opinion and therefore „barely alive at all“. Because of that, mala mala believe that they can torment these half-beings with impunity, which they usually do by pretending to be benevolent bringers of poisonous gifts and sowing, through both magical and mundane means, strife. Watching humanoids fighting over something that will destroy the owner is the highest amusement for a malum malum.
A malum malum speaks Common, Draconic, Sylvan and Elf.

Apple of Discord (Su): A malum malum can lay an enchantment on a small or smaller object within 30 ft. that it can see. This object exudes a feeling of coveting and possessivenes. Any creature except mala mala that sees the object must make a Will save (DC 21) or feel the desire to possess it. This creature will do anything it can to get it into its possession and keep others from having it. (A creature will generally not do acts that crassly go against its alignment or any codes of conduct it is under). A creature that isn't under threat currently may make a new save once per minute.
The enchantment dissolves after 1 hour, leaving every affected creature clear-headed. The DC is based on Charisma. This is a mind-effecting charm effect.
Apple of Wisdom (Su): A malum malum may shed once per day one of the fruit growing on its body and infuse it intent and positive energy. Any living creature that eats the fruit gains one of the following effects, as chosen by the malum malum when the ability is activated: Fast Healing 3, enhancement bonus +4 to all skills based on physical abilities, enhancement bonus +4 to all skills based on mental abilities. The effect lasts for an hour.
When creating the fruit, the malum malum can (and usually does) also put a curse on the fruit. When the fruit's boon ends, the eater must make a Fortitude save (DC 19) or suffer from one of the following drawbacks for 8 hours, as chosen by the malum malum when the ability is activated: feeblemind, confusion, -4 to all physical abilities (min 1), nauseated. Remove curse at 12th caster level and break enchantment dispel these effects, but spells based on positive energy (like panacea) can't, instead resetting the duration. The curse also disappears if the target becomes affected by energy drain or a harm spell. Living constructs get a bonus of +4 to their save.
Deathless that eat the fruit gain the boon without suffering the curse, as do mala mala and other living creatures with an affinity for positive energy (like ravids or lumi). Undead and living creatures with a connection to negative energy (like kir-lanan) that eat the fruit don't gain any benefits from it. Instead they take 6d6 damage from positive energy (Fortitude halves, DC 19).
DC is based on Charisma. An Apple of Wisdom remains empowered until it is used or destroyed, but a malum malum can't empower more than three Apples of Wisdom at once.
Lesser Plant Traits (Ex): Hybrid beings like the malum malum enjoy most of the traits of plants. Mala mala are immune to mind-affecting effects, poison, sleep effects, paralysis, polymorph and stunning. Unlike real plants they are subject to critical hits. Abilities that only affect plant creatures can affect a malum malum, but it receives a +4 to saves against the effect.
Negative Vulnerability (Ex): A malum malum takes +50% more damage from any effect that deals damage through negative energy. It also takes a penalty of -4 to saves against effects based on negative energy. Evil clerics can turn a malum malum as if it were deathless.
Positive Adaptation (Ex): A malum malum regains +50% more hit points from any effect that restores hit points and is based on positive energy. Mala mala are immune to all negative or damaging effects or side effects that are based on positive energy.


The Conqueror Worm
Colossal Outsider (Air, Earth, Extraplanar, Fire, Water) or (Extraplanar, Wood)
Hit Dice: 72d8+1080 (1404 hp)
Initiative: +9
Speed: 80 ft. (16 squares), Burrow 160 ft
Amor Class: 73 (-8 size, +1 Dex, +10 deflection, +60 natural), touch 13, Flat footed 72
Base Attack/Grapple: +72/+119
Attack: Bite melee +96 (16d6+43, 19-20/2x)
Full Attack: Bite melee +96 (16d6+43, 19-20/2x)
Space/Reach: 60 ft./50 ft.
Special Attacks: All-consuming rush, consume space, improved grab, spell-like abilities, summon epic worms, swallow whole
Special Qualities: Abomination traits, aura of utter consumption, DR 25/Epic and Adamantine, entropic grace, Fast Healing 50, Immunity to acid and negative energy, SR 72, tremorsense 500 ft.
Saves: Fort +67, Ref +53, Will +59
Abilities: Str 69, Dex 12, Con 40, Int 3, Wis 24, Cha 31
Skills: Climb +104, Concentrate +90, Listen +82, Swim +104
Feats: Cleave, Combat Reflexes, Great Cleave, Improved Critical (Bite), Improved Initiative, Improved Sunder, Power Attack, Weapon Focus (Bite)
Epic Feats: Damage Reduction 4x, Devastating Critical (Bite), Epic Fortitude, Epic Prowess 2x, Epic Reflexes, Epic Sunder, Epic Will, Overwhelming Critical (Bite), Quicken Spell-Like Ability (Disastrous Orbs), Quicken Spell-Like Ability (Spellworm), Quicken Spell-Like Ability (Summon Epic Worms), Spellcasting Harrier, Superior Initiative
Environment: Elemental Plane of Wood, Negative Energy Plane
Organisation: Unique... hopefully
Challenge Rating: 60
Treasure: None
Alignment: True neutral
Advancement: 73+ HD (Colossal)
Level Adjustment: -

Where Wood meets Negative Energy, in the Plain of Putrefaction, where everything alive rots and decays into sludge, a monstrum burrows its way through the rotting matter. Unimaginably old, possessed of power that even the gods are careful of, this greatest of all maggots has no agenda besides feeding a hunger as vast as the planes itself. Only legends tell of its name: The Conqueror Worm.
The Conqueror Worm is resembles a titanic worm or maggot, a grey-ish blood red in colour, with thousands of small legs growing from its belly. It is hundreds of feet long, and has never been seen in its totality; survivors of encounters with it only ever saw parts of it breaking from the foul ground.
Legends claim that the Conqueror Worm is the Father of All Maggots, the First Worm. Some speculate that it is the first worm to gnaw a World Tree, and that creatures like Nidhöggr are echoes or spawn of it. Others (especially those of the Doomguard) theorize that it was born the first time a living being died and rotted, and that it grew with every being that has died since. It, so the theory, will continue to do so until it has grown to infinite size and devour the Great Wheel. And lastly, the most scared of whispers tell of multiple Conqueror Worms, that there is in fact a whole race of those beings. And that they continue to breed.
The Conqueror Worm does not communicate.

Abomination Traits: Immune to polymorphing, petrification, and other form-altering attacks; not subject to energy drain, ability drain, or ability damage, or death from massive damage; immune to mind-affecting effects; cold resistance 20; nondetection; true seeing at will; blindsight 500 ft.
All-Consuming Rush (Ex): As a Full-Round Action, the Conqueror Worm can move up to double its speed in a straight line with its mouth wide open. All creatures in its path must make a Reflex save (DC 75). Any creature that succeeds is pushed to side. Any creature that fails takes damage as if it was hit by the Worm's bite and is swallowed whole. The DC is based on Strength.
Aura of Utter Consumption (Su): The Conqueror Worm is surrounded by an aura of entropy that erodes everything, even magic and supernatural effects. Any spell, power, utterance or other effect within 60 ft. around the Worm has its caster/manifester/etc level reduced by 10. Any such effect within 40 ft. around the Worm has its caster level reduced by 20. Any such effect within 20 ft has it reduced by 40. Spells etc with an area that partially overlaps one of those radii have the reduction only applied in the overlap.
Furthermore, each missile that is shot into this aura takes 20 points of damage through negative energy per section of the aura it crosses. If the missile is destroyed before reaching the Worm, it doesn't deal any damage. Magic missile weapons may make a Fortitude save (DC 56) for half damage.
Additionally, every creature within 60 ft. of the Worm must make a Fortitude save per round (DC 56) or suffer 1 negative level. Negative levels gained this way even apply to constructs and undead. All saves are based on Charisma.
Consume Space (Su): As a Standard Action, the Conqueror Worm can eat space itself that seperates it from its meal. This works like a cone-shaped breath weapon with a range of 500 ft. Anything in that area must make a Reflex save (DC 61) or be moved in a straight line as close to the Conqueror Worm as possible. After Consuming Space, the Conqueror Worm must wait 1d4 rounds before it can do so again. The DC is based on Constitution.
Entropic Grace (Ex): The pure power of entropy and decay exuded by the Conqueror Worm protects it. It receives its Cha-bonus as a deflection bonus to AC and as a resistence bonus to all saves.
Improved Grab (Ex): To use this ability, the Conqueror Worm must hit a creature with a bite attack. It can then attempt to start a grapple as a free action without provoking an attack of opportunity. If it wins the grapple check, it establishes a hold and can swallow the opponent whole.
Swallow Whole (Ex): The Conqueror Worm can try to swallow a grabbed opponent by making a successful grapple check. Once inside, the opponent takes 10d12+60 points of bludgeoning damage plus 60 points of acid damage per round from the Worm’s gizzard and and suffers 3 negative levels per round (DC to remove the level drain: 56, DC based on Charisma). Negative levels gained this way even apply to constructs and undead. A swallowed creature can cut its way out by using a light slashing or piercing weapon to deal 100 points of damage to the gizzard (AC 80). Once the creature exits, muscular action closes the hole; another swallowed opponent must cut its own way out. The Conqueror Worm's interior can hold 2 Colossal, 8 Gargantuan, 32 Huge, 128 Large, 512 Medium or smaller opponents.
Spell-like abilities: At will – heightened disastrous orbs (DC augmented to 50), spellworm^ELH (DC augemented to 55)
Summon Epic Worms (Sp): Up to six times per day, the Conqueror Worm can summon two paragon^ELH fiendwurms^MM2, four paragon nightcrawlers or four paragon century worms^FF. (The portal in the fiendwurms's gizzard leads into the Conqueror Worm's gizzard. Therefore the fiendwurms can't belch out demons). The summoned worms are not directly under the Conqueror Worm's control, but will work to support it (and are generally smart enough to stay out of its way and not get eaten).

[Tzardok]

Wood Genasi
Like other genasi, wood genasi are humans with ancestry from the elemental planes, in this case Elemental Wood. In some rare cases, a wood genasi can also be born from the union of two opposed para-genasi, like a smoke and an ooze genasi. They are rarer than para-elemental genasi, but more common than the practically non-existent quasi-elemental ones. Wood genasi tend to be patient, but in a more active way than earth genasi, and prefer to improve themselves and outgrow obstacles instead of either weathering them or attacking them head on. Wood genasi tend to be true neutral.
Wood genasi stand usually taller than their human parrents and have at least one feature that reflects their element: bark-like skin, leaves in their hair, or limbs that look like carved from precious wood.

Racial Traits
Wood genasi have the following traits:

• +2 Constitution, +2 Wisdom, -2 Dexterity, -2 Charisma: Wood genasi are tough and far sighted, but wooden in their movements and demeanor I crack myself up :-D
• Medium
• Base speed 30 ft.
• Wooden creation (Sp): Wood genasi can once per day create a single wooden weapon or up to ten pieces of wooden ammunition fit for their own size. For every four character levels this weapon or ammunition receives an enhancement bonus of +1. In all other regards this ability works like minor creation with a caster level equal to the genasi's character level.
• +1 racial bonus on saving throws against all wood- and plant-based spells and effects. This bonus increases by +1 for every five class levels the genasi attains.
• Photosynthesis (Su): Wood genasi don't need to eat on days they get their daily ration of water and at least two hours of sunlight.
• Clerical Focus: A wood genasi cleric must choose a deity who grant access to the Plant or the Wood domain and select one of those two as one of her two domains.
• Outsider: Wood genasi are Visceral outsiders.
• Automatic languages: Common. Bonus languages: Any, except secret languages, such as Druidic.
• Favoured Class: Wu Jen
• Level Adjustment: +1

Wood Gen
Tiny Outsider (Air, Earth, Extraplanar, Fire, Water) or (Extraplanar, Wood)
Hit Dice: 1d8+1 (5 hp)
Initiative: +1
Speed: 20 ft. (4 squares), fly 60 ft. (perfect)
Armor Class: 15 (+2 size, +1 dex, +2 natural), touch 13, flat-footed 14
Base Attack/Grapple: +1/-8
Attack: Slam +4 melee (1d2/x3)
Full Attack: Two slams +4 melee (1d2/x3)
Space/Reach: 2-1/2 ft./0 ft.
Special Attacks Spiky fists
Special Qualities: Darkvision 60 ft., elemental endurance, elemental travel, fetch spells, immunity to acid, vulnerability to fire
Saves: Fort +3, Ref +3, Will +4
Abilities: Str 9, Dex 12, Con 12, Int 13, Wis 15, Cha 10
Skills: Concentration +5, Escape Artist +5, Hide +11, Knowledge (Arcane) +5, Knowledge (The Planes) +5, Listen +4, Move Silenty +3, Search +5, Spellcraft +5, Spot +4, Survival +6
Feats: Combat Casting^B, Weapon Finesse
Environment: Any elemental plane
Organization: Solitary
Challenge Rating: ½
Treasure: Standard
Alignment: Often neutral good
Advancement: 2-3 hd (tiny), 4-6 hd (small)
Level Adjustment: -

Spiky Fists (Su): A wood gen's arms and weapons grow spikes and thorns when attacking. It deals 1 additional point of piercing damage when it hits in melee. Also the critical damage multiplier of its natural and artificial melee weapons is increased by 1.

A wood gen's master must choose any one of the elemental subtypes to be "primary" in regard to the Elemental Protection class feature.

[Metastachydium]

Elemental Wood

ELEMENTAL WOOD!

[Beat.]

How come there's not a single Plant there?

I hope people will like it and that the epic one actually does its flavour text justice.

It is an ABOMINATION. But I'll tackle it separately later, if you don't mind that, lest it eats my sanity. (That's a lot of HD there.)
So without further ado, I present:

Zurrzirr
Large Vermin (Extraplanar)

A proper pollinating bumbledragonscorpion with an onomatopoeic name? Good.

Hit Dice: 5d8+15 (27 hp)

37 hp.

Base Attack/Grapple: +3/+9
Attack: Claw melee +5 (1d6+3)
Full Attack: Two claws melee +5 (1d6+3)

That should be +4 for 1d6+2, unless you meant to give 'em a higher STR, in which case grapple's off.

Level Adjustment: +1

Vermin with LA will never cease to amuse.

Soil Diver (Template)

Okay, this is a fun twist on Amphibious Creature. Well done.

Soil divers tend to look less aquatic than the normal versions, with reptilian scales or mole-like fur where fish scales, slimy skin or a seal's coat were before.

What's wrong with slimy skin, though? (Asking for a friend. (The friend may or may not be a friendly earthworm.))

Genie, Shengzhang
Large Outsider (Air, Earth, Extraplanar, Fire, Water) or (Extraplanar, Wood)

Base Attack/Grapple: +7/+15

Grapple +16.

The Shengzhang, the genies of Wood, are of generally peaceful nature and probably the most benevolent of all genies in regard to mortals. This may be because of their general obscurity and a quirk of their ability to fulfill wishes that makes them relatively uninteresting to the kind of people who routinely try to enslave genies: their wishes simply fail if they aren't used for selfless and benevolent purposes.

Everything is better with PLANTIES! It's just a fact.

Calm Weather (Sp)

Very wholesome. I like it.

Spell-like abilities: At will – backbiter^SC (DC 13), comand plants (DC 16), detect magic, entangle (DC 13), invisibility (self only), plant growth; 3/day – antilife shell, heroes' feast, iron wood, wood shape; 1/day – divination; 1/week – limited wish (only to non-genies). 12th caster level.

No Speak with Plants? How can they not have Speak with Plants?!

Gronkh
Medium monstrous Humanoid (Extraplanar, Fire)

Attack: Heavy pick melee +11 (1d6+6/x4) or throwing dart ranged +9 (1d4+4)
Full Attack: Heavy pick melee +11/+6 (1d6+6/x4) or throwing dart ranged +9/+4 (1d4+4)

Throwing dart? The only non-throwing darts not fired from dart throwers in the whole game that I can recall would be called "blowgun" in this context.

Leafy Sea Serpent
Leafy sea serpents are the smallest and most cowardly of sea serpents (see Dragon #345). These highly specialized ambush predators are covered with leaf-like appendages that make them seem like floating masses of water plants.

Leafy Seahorse Dragons for the win!

Their adaptation to water plants meant that they prefered to live closer to land than other sea serpents, and this left them in a precarious position when the larger and deeper living sea serpents gathered to eradicate them.

Man, the other Sea Serpents are jerks.

Sudden Strike +1d6

Sudden Strike and it makes sense! We have a new one, ladies and gentlemen.

Leafy Outline (Ex): While in brackisch water and water full of kelp, sea grass and other aquatic plants, a leafy sea serpent receives a +10 circumstance bonus to Hide and ignores size penalties to Hide.

Circumstance: the best kind of bonus (a bonus bonus, so to say?)!

Malum Malum

No. Way. I can't believe you actually did that! (Bonus points are being earned for the Latin Latin pun pun as we speak.)

Medium Magical Beast (Extraplanar)

Not an Outsider, though? Besides the thematic side of things, good Will and good skills wouldn't look half bad on these.

Speed: 40 ft. (6 squares), Climb 20 ft.

8 squares.

Apple of Wisdom (Su):

A big one, but quaintly executed.

but spells based on positive energy (like panacea) can't, instead resetting the duration. The curse also disappears if the target becomes affected by energy drain or a harm spell. Living constructs get a bonus of +4 to their save.
Deathless that eat the fruit gain the boon without suffering the curse, as do mala mala and other living creatures with an affinity for positive energy (like ravids or lumi). Undead and living creatures with a connection to negative energy (like kir-lanan) that eat the fruit don't gain any benefits from it. Instead they take 6d6 damage from positive energy (Fortitude halves, DC 19).
DC is based on Charisma.

I like these positive/negative interactions in particular.

Wood Genasi

I just love these. Would play, would recommend.

[*]Wooden creation (Sp): Wood genasi can once per day create a single wooden weapon or up to ten pieces of wooden ammunition fit for their own size. For every four character levels this weapon or ammunition receives an enhancement bonus of +1. In all other regards this ability works like minor creation with a caster level equal to the genasi's character level.

Does the wooden stuff grow from them? (I assume otherwise, but I had to ask.)

[*]Photosynthesis (Su): Wood genasi don't need to eat on days they get their daily ration of water and at least two hours of sunlight.

AUTOTROPHY! Yes to autotrophy!

Wood Gen
Tiny Outsider (Air, Earth, Extraplanar, Fire, Water) or (Extraplanar, Wood)

Spiky Fists (Su): A wood gen's arms and weapons grow spikes and thorns when attacking. It deals 1 additional point of piercing damage when it hits in melee. Also the critical damage multiplier of its natural and artificial melee weapons is increased by x1.

I'd go with "is increased by 1" for mathematical accuracy.

[Tzardok]

ELEMENTAL WOOD!

[Beat.]

How come there's not a single Plant there?

It's Fauna of Flora, nor Flora of Flora.

A proper pollinating bumbledragonscorpion with an onomatopoeic name? Good.

That one was the first one I came up with, followed by His Dread Majesty, the Conqueror Worm. I'm quite proud of it, and of the fact that it weaponizes hayfever.

37 hp.



That should be +4 for 1d6+2, unless you meant to give 'em a higher STR, in which case grapple's off.

Fixed.

Okay, this is a fun twist on Amphibious Creature. Well done.

Thank you. I was worried that it didn't do more, but on the other hand does it need to be more complex?

What's wrong with slimy skin, though? (Asking for a friend. (The friend may or may not be a friendly earthworm.))

*shrug* I thought more of snakes, moles, blindworms etc as "target creature" esthetics.
Edit: Also, imagine how cute a fluffy fuzzy octopus would look like.

Grapple +16.

Fixed.

Very wholesome. I like it.

I studied up a bit on muslims in China for this, and came upon a bunch of folktales in which muslims possess or strive to possess magic items that calm storms and use them for their community's sake. So I decided to include this here.

No Speak with Plants? How can they not have Speak with Plants?!

Didn't think of it. I also imagine them more like farmers and gardeners; non-sapient plants are probably more ressource than being for them.

Throwing dart? The only non-throwing darts not fired from dart throwers in the whole game that I can recall would be called "blowgun" in this context.

Germanism on my part, sorry. (The German name for darts is "Wurfpfeile", throwing arrows. I must've crossed some associations there.)

Man, the other Sea Serpents are jerks.

No good sea serpents around. No good linnorms either. Weird. Are there any great and powerful dragon-kin that are good?

Sudden Strike and it makes sense! We have a new one, ladies and gentlemen.

I was wondering if I should instead use Sneak Attack, but then I decided that it wouldn't make much of a difference either way. These serpents don't hunt together often enough for the Flanking rider to come into play.

No. Way. I can't believe you actually did that! (Bonus points are being earned for the Latin Latin pun pun as we speak.)

Not an Outsider, though? Besides the thematic side of things, good Will and good skills wouldn't look half bad on these.

Those were the ones that changed the most over time (followed by the gronkhs, who were for some time elementals), probably because I didn't have a solid idea what I actually wanted them to do and be. They have been outsiders, monstrous humanoids, plants and fey at different nebulous points. In the end, I stand by Magical Beast. The concept is after all that they are alive and of flesh and blood (for certain definitions of flesh and blood), just "better". Outsiders as beings that are more spiritual stuff pretending to be flesh and blood are a less good fit IMO. One could make a case for Visceral Outsider, but I'm happy with where they are now.

8 squares.

Fixed.

I like these positive/negative interactions in particular.

Having had positive energy with drawbacks before, I felt that negative energy with a positive side effect would be appropriate.

Does the wooden stuff grow from them? (I assume otherwise, but I had to ask.)

I'd assume so.

I'd go with "is increased by 1" for mathematical accuracy.

Fixed.

[Metastachydium]

A'right, back to business!

The Conqueror Worm
Colossal Outsider (Air, Earth, Extraplanar, Fire, Water) or (Extraplanar, Wood)

Attack: Bite melee +95 (16d6+43, 19-20/2x)
Full Attack: Bite melee +95 (16d6+43, 19-20/2x)

+94 to-hit (+72 BAB, +29 STR, +1 feat, -8 size).

Skills: Listen +82, Swim +104

Come on, that's, like, 150 skill points spent on invisible cross-class half-ranks there!

Feats: Cleave, Combat Reflexes, Great Cleave, Improved Critical (Bite), Improved Initiative, Improved Sunder, Power Attack, Weapon Focus (Bite)
Epic Feats: Damage Reduction 4x, Devastating Critical (Bite), Epic Fortitude, Epic Prowess, Epic Reflexes, Epic Sunder, Epic Will, Overwhelming Critical (Bite), Quicken Spell-Like Ability (Disastrous Orbs), Quicken Spell-Like Ability (Spellworm), Quicken Spell-Like Ability (Summon Epic Worms), Spellcasting Harrier, Superior Initiative

I count one missing feat.

The Conqueror Worm is resembles a titanic worm or maggot, a grey-ish blood red in colour, with thousands of small legs growing from its belly.

…so not really like a worm or maggot?

It is hundreds of feet long, and has never been seen in its totality; survivors of encounters with it only ever saw parts of it breaking from the foul ground.

I like how you're working around the whole "a monster can only have so much space" issue.

Others (especially those of the Doomguard) theorize that it was born the first time a living being died and rotted, and that it grew with every being that has died since. It, so the theory, will continue to do so until it has grown to infinite size and devour the Great Wheel.

That is beautifully ominous.

The Conqueror Worm does not communicate.

What does it do with its big stupid Telepathy, then?

Aura of Utter Consumption (Su): The Conqueror Worm is surrounded by an aura of entropy that erodes everything, even magic and supernatural effects. Any spell, power, utterance or other effect within 60 ft. around the Worm has its caster/manifester/etc level reduced by 10. Any such effect within 40 ft. around the Worm has its caster level reduced by 20. Any such effect within 20 ft has it reduced by 40. Spells etc with an area that partially overlaps one of those radii have the reduction only applied in the overlap.
Furthermore, each missile that is shot into this aura takes 20 points of damage through negative energy per section of the aura it crosses. If the missile is destroyed before reaching the Worm, it doesn't deal any damage. Magic missile weapons may make a Fortitude save (DC 51) for half damage.
Additionally, every creature within 60 ft. of the Worm must make a Fortitude save per round (DC 51) or suffer 1 negative level. Negative levels gained this way even apply to constructs and undead.

DC 56.

Lastly, the Conqueror Worm applies his Charisma bonus as a deflection bonus to AC.

This bit looks tacked on with no mechanical or thematic connection to anything eles the ability does.

Consume Space (Su): As a Standard Action, the Conqueror Worm can eat space itself that seperates it from its meal. This works like a cone-shaped breath weapon with a range of 500 ft. Anything in that area must make a Reflex save (DC 56) or be moved in a straight line as close to the Conqueror Worm as possible. After Consuming Space, the Conqueror Worm must wait 1d4 rounds before it can do so again. The DC is based on Constitution.

DC 61 (someone's been fiddling with numbers in post-production, eh?). (Also: man, now you'll think half my next Elemental's thing exists to just spite you here.)

Swallow Whole (Ex): The Conqueror Worm can try to swallow a grabbed opponent by making a successful grapple check. Once inside, the opponent takes 10d12+60 points of bludgeoning damage plus 60 points of acid damage per round from the Worm’s gizzard and and suffers 3 negative levels per round (DC to remove the level drain: 51, DC based on Charisma).

DC 56 once more.

Negative levels gained this way even apply to constructs and undead.

MORE NEGATIVE THAN THOU IN YoUR FACE!! (Nice!)

The Conqueror Worm's interior can hold 2 Colossal

I continue to enjoy the "Colossal size for this thing is just a shorthand for BIGGER" stuff.

, 8 Gargantuan, 32 Huge, 128 Large, 512 Medium or smaller opponents.

Summon Epic Worms (Sp):

Somehow this sounds far more comical to me than it has any right to.

fiendworm (…) (The portal in the fiendworm's gizzard

MM2 spells it Fiendwurm.

It's Fauna of Flora, nor Flora of Flora.

[Grumblegrumble.] Still not fair.

I'm quite proud of it, and of the fact that it weaponizes hayfever.

I know you know I AGREE and APPROVE.

*shrug* I thought more of snakes, moles, blindworms etc as "target creature" esthetics.

I guess… [Sad earthworm wriggling noises from the background.]

Edit: Also, imagine how cute a fluffy fuzzy octopus would look like.

No need to imagine. I've seen crochet octopodes and the like and you're making a fairly convincing argument here.

Didn't think of it. I also imagine them more like farmers and gardeners; non-sapient plants are probably more ressource than being for them.

And to think I liked them for a moment there!

Germanism on my part, sorry. (The German name for darts is "Wurfpfeile", throwing arrows. I must've crossed some associations there.)

Oh, German compunds are the best! (And compunds beat out the English way of "let's just eat another language, it might have a word for it" just about always for me anyhow.)

No good sea serpents around. No good linnorms either. Weird. Are there any great and powerful dragon-kin that are good?

Huh. Well, some of the Landwyrms are kinda Neutral? I suppose?

Those were the ones that changed the most over time (followed by the gronkhs, who were for some time elementals), probably because I didn't have a solid idea what I actually wanted them to do and be. They have been outsiders, monstrous humanoids, plants and fey at different nebulous points. In the end, I stand by Magical Beast. The concept is after all that they are alive and of flesh and blood (for certain definitions of flesh and blood), just "better". Outsiders as beings that are more spiritual stuff pretending to be flesh and blood are a less good fit IMO. One could make a case for Visceral Outsider, but I'm happy with where they are now.

I kinda feel like Fey could have worked even then. But yeah, that's fair.

[Tzardok]

Finally time and brain power enough to deal with this.

+94 to-hit (+72 BAB, +29 STR, +1 feat, -8 size).

+95 to-hit (+72 BAB, +29 STR, -8 size, +1 Weapon Focus (Bite), +1 Epic Prowess).

Incidentally, does Epic Prowess apply to grapple checks? It says +1 to all attack rolls, and grapple checks are a specialized attack roll, aren't they?

Come on, that's, like, 150 skill points spent on invisible cross-class half-ranks there!

I got too used to stupid things having low skill points. Ugh, let's see... Move Silently and Hide? Concentrate and Intimidate? ... I'll go with Climb annd Concentrate.

I count one missing feat.

Yet another one? *groan* I'll just add another instance of Epic Prowess. Now the to-hit is +96! Hah!

…so not really like a worm or maggot?

It's an abomination, what do you expect? Also, if you want to conquer, you need to put a lot of boots on the ground.

That is beautifully ominous.

The Multiverse is made out of so much stuff, someone has to eat it up before it goes bad.

What does it do with its big stupid Telepathy, then?

Listen in to other people's earworms. Or a copy-paste error. Either or. Technically I should also remove the true sight ability, as it's blind, but who cares?

This bit looks tacked on with no mechanical or thematic connection to anything eles the ability does.

Technically it is. The deflection bonus was there at the beginning, to give it at least something resembling a touch AC, and then I decided to put it here as the best space available. Y'know what, make it something else:
Entropic Grace (Ex): The pure power of entropy and decay exuded by the Conqueror Worm protects it. It receives its Cha-bonus as a deflection bonus to AC and as a resistence bonus to all saves.

DC 61 (someone's been fiddling with numbers in post-production, eh?).

Actually no. I have no idea what happened here. Maybe I somehow made a mistake when halving the HD at the start and then continued to use the wrong number?

MORE NEGATIVE THAN THOU IN YoUR FACE!! (Nice!)

Everything decays. Iron rusts, stone erodes, and bone and flesh rot, no matter how magic immune or negative infused it is.

[Metastachydium]

+95 to-hit (+72 BAB, +29 STR, -8 size, +1 Weapon Focus (Bite), +1 Epic Prowess).

Oh right, sorry. Missed that one. (Epic feats these days…)
[/QUOTE]

Incidentally, does Epic Prowess apply to grapple checks? It says +1 to all attack rolls, and grapple checks are a specialized attack roll, aren't they?

I'd say it should.

It's an abomination, what do you expect? Also, if you want to conquer, you need to put a lot of boots on the ground.

Heh. [Imagines the thing wearing tiny Colossal little combat boots.]

Technically it is. The deflection bonus was there at the beginning, to give it at least something resembling a touch AC, and then I decided to put it here as the best space available. Y'know what, make it something else:
Entropic Grace (Ex): The pure power of entropy and decay exuded by the Conqueror Worm protects it. It receives its Cha-bonus as a deflection bonus to AC and as a resistence bonus to all saves.

I like it!

[Tzardok]

I'd say it should.

Has been added in.

[Tzardok]

Uncommented.

Just for Pun 4: Abracalabrador

Medium Magical Beast
Hit Dice: 7d10+7 (45 hp)
Initiative: +3
Speed: 40 ft. (8 squares)
Armor Class: 19 (+3 Dex, +6 natural), touch 13, flat-footed 16
Base Attack/Grapple: +7/+10
Attack: Bite +10 melee (1d6+4)
Full Attack: Bite +10 melee (1d6+4)
Space/Reach: 5 ft./5 ft.
Special Attacks: Utterances
Special Qualities: Darkvision 60 ft., low-light vision, scent
Saves: Fort +6, Ref +8, Will +5
Abilities: Str 16, Dex 17, Con 12, Int 15, Wis 13, Cha 11
Skills: Hide +9, Listen +7, Sense Motive +7, Spot +7, Survival +7, Truespeak +15
Feats: Iron Will, Run, Skill Focus (Truespeak), Track^B
Environment: Warm plains
Organization: Solitary, pair, or pack (7-16)
Challenge Rating: 4
Treasure: None
Alignment: Usually chaotic good
Advancement: 8-14 HD (Medium); 15-21 HD (Large)
Level Adjustment: +2 (cohort)

Believed to be a close relative of the blink dog, the abracalabrador is of similiarily benevolent, but much more mischievous nature. The foxish creatures enjoy befuddling intruders in their territory with the bizarre effects they create with a simple barked command.
An abracalabrador speaks (besides a natural talent for Truespeak) Common and Blink Dog.

Utterances: An abracalabrador can speak certain utterances as if it had a number of truenamer levels equal to its HD. It can speak the utterances eldritch attraction, vision sharpened (only reversed), create object, seize item and word of opening.

A note: I prefer to use the Truenaming fix in the Book of Words, and used it to determine what level of utterances the abracalabrador should get.
Edit: The Book of Words can be found in this thread. or directly downloaded here.

[Metastachydium]

[QUOTE=Tzardok;25961391]Abracalabrador[/B]

My.

Special Attacks: Utterances

Oh, my.

The numbers are all shiny, bright and correctly computed as usual. I'd give an expert opinion on the power level, LA and such, but that would require my looking into truenaming-related stuff, and I'll need my sanity largely intact next week.

[Beni-Kujaku]

Just for Pun 4: Abracalabrador

Those are a lot of vowels.

The foxish creatures enjoy befuddling intruders in their territory with the bizarre effects they create with a simple barked command.

I was about to question the ease of truespeech with canine vocal chords, but as someone who once argued that a Shrieker Fungus could truespeak, I will not go down that way.

Utterances: An abracalabrador can speak certain utterances as if it had a number of truenamer levels equal to its HD. It can speak the utterances eldritch attraction, vision sharpened (only reversed), create object, seize item and word of opening.

Oh, cool, you chose the fun ones. Just have to have a Silence utterance and we can have an invisible, inaudible dog throwing magically created items on the PCs' heads using "the Universe hears you just fine". Also, funny thing about bringing an object to your hand with seize item is... You need hands!

A note: I prefer to use the Truenaming fix in the Book of Words, and used it to determine what level of utterances the abracalabrador should get.

As you should. The BoW is great. I think my favorite part (apart from making the most conceptually fun but mechanically broken class actually playable) is the description of word of opening. "You inform the universe that a door is supposed to be open". I can just imagine Ao looking down at a single dog and shout in a rumbling voice "Oh, yeah, you're right, didn't see I left that one closed. Let me fix that real quick."

There's not really anything good here except fixed-list truenaming, so I think WotC would assign something like LA+2. And I think CR 5 (or even 4) is enough, after all it doesn't really have anything to damage the PCs in a fight.

[Tzardok]

Those are a lot of vowels.

I think the balance of vowel to consonants is quite right.

Oh, cool, you chose the fun ones.

Well, I chose those because I looked up what utterances best fit a stage magician. There aren't a lot of illusion utterances, so.. I made do.

Also, funny thing about bringing an object to your hand with seize item is... You need hands!

My dog can catch objects flying at it well enough without hands, thank you.

There's not really anything good here except fixed-list truenaming, so I think WotC would assign something like LA+2. And I think CR 5 (or even 4) is enough, after all it doesn't really have anything to damage the PCs in a fight.

Accepted.

Edit: Say Beni, do you have an opinion on the Elemental Wood creatures?

[enderlord99]

If I may make a request, I'd like to see an Ashtadhatu Dragon brewed up (perhaps as a hybrid of Gold and Prismatic, but maybe some other combination would work better)

[Tzardok]

An interesting idea, but if it happens, it will take some time. I've got the flu, and don't feel like brewing anything besides herbal tea. Sorry about that.

[enderlord99]

Understandable.

Sorry to hear about your illness.

[Beni-Kujaku]

Now after that little joke, I'd like to post the results of a project I've been working on (no, not the big one; that one's on ice for the moment) since the talk about Elemental Wood inspired me. I hope people will like it and that the epic one actually does its flavour text justice. So without further ado, I present:

Fauna of Flora

I like that title. Are elementals fauna or material? What about plant creatures? Is a shambling mound fauna?

Zurrzirr

The buzzing of its many wings gives the zurrzirr its name.
A very good way to give more insight on a particular aspect of a monster (here, the sound it makes) without breaking immersion, I love it.

Abilities: Str 15, Dex 21, Con 16, Int -, Wis 10, Cha 2
Level Adjustment: +1

Kinda high overall physical stats for a vermin. Also, insects generally have a much higher Cha than non-insect (Monstrous) Vermin in 3.5. Not sure if that's really relevant, it's just the same kind of thing as "mammals and birds generally have 2 Int, non-mammal non-bird animals generally have 1", but since you described the zurrzirr as an insect...
However, something much less debatable is that a creature with no intelligence cannot have a level adjustment.

In appearance, a zurrzirr resembles a cross between a dragonfly and a scorpion, with only two pairs of legs and four pairs of wings. Two claws, somewhere between a scorpion's pincers and a mantis' forelegs, serve as its weapon of defense.

I'm a bit disappointed by the Zurrzirr's attacks. Only claws, really? I would have liked to see a scorpion stinger if you want to go the scorpion/dragonfly hybrid route. Not even a poison, or Improved Grab, or any rider at all? At least affecting a grappled creature with pollen every round would have given the zurrzirr a bit more personality.

Zurrzirrs are practically always covered in a thick layer of pollen. When agitated, it shakes the pollen loose with nervous wingbeats and shrouds itself into a cloud of pollen.
Cloud of Pollen (Ex): When irritated or endangered, the zurrzirr stirrs up its pollen and forms a cloud with a radius of 20 ft. around itself.

Can it do that at will? Isn't it out of pollen at one point? Does it eat the pollen itself? Does it have a hive? Does it willingly pollinate the flowers of the plane? I'd like to know more about its society, or, barring that, its life cycle. I don't know what makes it "wood plane"-ey, or why it can live in the plane of Air. As it is, it feels like a background monster with no reason to interact with the party. Overall, a bit disappointed by the monster, besides the name which is great.

Soil Diver (Template)

Sure, that's not a bad template. I'm a bit doubtful of the +0 LA. Burrow is generally slightly better than swim, and gaining +2 Str for -2 Dex is just asking for min-maxing. My first thought was that Water Orcs would love this template. Maybe you already thought about it by restricting it to non-humanoids, which I thought felt a bit artificial. Perhaps the type restriction is enough, but I'd consider removing the +2 Str to align this template with the Amphibious one.

Genie, Shengzhang

Like was already said, a very wholesome monster, with well-written appearance (I particularly like the mask-face), lore and personality. I very much likey. Agree with LA+5 (maybe +6), but I'd increase the CR to 7. Even if we don't count limited wish, there are slightly too many high-level SLAs for CR 6, especially on an Outsider. I chuckled at the fact that even the narrator got bored listing all the Huangdi's titles ^^ Also agree with how Calm Weather uses the 5e dispelling method, only requiring a roll if the targetted effect is of a higher level than the dispelling effect. Probably should have been the same in 3.5 as well.

Gronkh

Urgh. One single ability on a 7 RHD creature, and it's a defensive one? The number of options of a monster should grow with its number of RHD. Here, there is no reason I can see not to only give it 3 or 4 RHD. Especially for a nice and playful species, 7 RHD seems kind of a lot. I'd like to know a few ways with which they use their natural talents to play pranks. How do they use Smoulder if not in combat (since they don't seem the fighting type)? "They supplement their diet smoked meat and vegetables." I think a "with" is missing here. Also, where do they find smoked meat? It's not that common either on the planes of Wood or Fire.


I'll tackle the Leafy Sea Serpent, the Malum Malum (such a good name and reference) and the Conqueror tomorrow or overmorrow.

[Metastachydium]

An interesting idea, but if it happens, it will take some time. I've got the flu, and don't feel like brewing anything besides herbal tea. Sorry about that.

Get better, you fiend!

Is a shambling mound fauna?

Tzardok tells me Planties don't count. I was sad to learn that.

However, something much less debatable is that a creature with no intelligence cannot have a level adjustment.

Well, tell that to the Hairy Spider and Sword Spider^MComp, as updated to 3.5 standards by PGtF!

I'm a bit disappointed by the Zurrzirr's attacks. Only claws, really? I would have liked to see a scorpion stinger if you want to go the scorpion/dragonfly hybrid route. Not even a poison, or Improved Grab, or any rider at all? At least affecting a grappled creature with pollen every round would have given the zurrzirr a bit more personality.

I'd argue weaponized hay fever is more of a personality than the old standard isuue Improved Grab/Poison kind of fare.

Can it do that at will? Isn't it out of pollen at one point?

I'd assume that's an easy thing to remedy on its homeplane.

[Beni-Kujaku]

Leafy Sea Serpent
Leafy sea serpents are the smallest and most cowardly of sea serpents (see Dragon #345). These highly specialized ambush predators are covered with leaf-like appendages that make them seem like floating masses of water plants.

Thank you for that, it's surprising that we don't have a leafy seadragon monster in the first place.

They let victims come close and then blind them with their breath weapon, rendering them helpless against their sudden strikes. When this strategy fails, they often flee and hide to try anew.

I like them having slightly more complex tactics than other sea serpents.

when the larger and deeper living sea serpents gathered to eradicate them.

... Why?

Caught between the hostile dry land and their enemies' turf, the leafy sea serpents evaded their extinction by collectively fleeing to the Inner Planes.

... How?

Normalization remarks : Sea Serpents generally have their swim speed increased by increments of 20ft rather than 10ft, and have all their SLAs on even-numbered age categories.

CR 2/3/5/7/9/11/12/14/16/17/19/21 ?

The fact that the Strength score increases by 4 at the age categories immediately following a size increase and not during the during increase triggers me slightly.

The breath weapon is nice. I like rider effects.

Malum Malum
Medium Magical Beast (Extraplanar)
Challenge Rating: 9
Level Adjustment: +4

Does it have hands? Generally creatures with no hands make pretty bad PCs. Still, +4 seems good if slightly high even for WotC, and I'd say CR 8.

The malum malum (plural: mala mala)

Mala mala, do-doo, do-do-do.

The mala mala are beings without any negative energy in their metaphysical make-up. This makes them immortal and immune to age and mundane sicknesses. As a result, they look down on most other living beings, who are „contaminated with negative energy“ in their opinion and therefore „barely alive at all“.

Fun to have an evil creature made of Positive Energy, and the biblical references everywhere are very much appreciated. Love it all. I'd have gone even further and made it not that physically strong (since its physical attacks are lackluster anyway), but increasing its Cha even more to go with the "Father of Lies" aesthetic. Alternatively, lean into the serpent thing and give it Improved Grab on its bite, maybe with a Suggestion ability on grappled foe to emulate it wrapping around its prey and whispering in their ear. It already has fire and electricity resistance 10, why not go with acid and cold immunity to finish up the angel-like energy resistances?

Apple of Discord (Su): A malum malum can lay an enchantment on a small or smaller object within 30 ft. that it can see. This object exudes a feeling of coveting and possessivenes. Any creature except other mala mala that sees the object must make a Will save (DC 21) or feel the desire to possess it. This creature will do anything it can to get it into its possession and keep others from having it. (A creature will generally not do acts that crassly go against its alignment or any codes of conduct it is under). A creature that isn't under threat currently may make a new save once per minute.

"Any creature except other mala mala". So, this particular malum malum is affected by its own Apple of Discord, as written ^^
Why not add something like "and is compelled to use it at any occasion if applicable, such as donning an armor, striking with a weapon, eating affected foods and using affected magic item's special properties"? I feel like it would add even more to the ability.

The enchantment dissolves after 1 hour, leaving every affected creature clear-headed. The DC is based on Charisma. This is a mind-effecting charm effect.

More of a compulsion, isn't it?

Apple of Wisdom (Su): A malum malum may shed once per day one of the fruit growing on its body and infuse it intent and positive energy. Any living creature that eats the fruit gains one of the following effects, as chosen by the malum malum when the ability is activated: Fast Healing 3, enhancement bonus +4 to all skills based on physical abilities, enhancement bonus +4 to all skills based on mental abilities. The effect lasts for an hour.

How long does the fruit stay enchanted? One day? More? It would be fun to have the malum malum walk around with three apples of wisdom, one for itself to show it's harmless, one for Eve and one for Adam.

The Conqueror Worm

Gosh darnit, how are we even supposed to rate a CR 60 dumb stupid thing? Still, 60 seems a bit too much. Summoning two CR 33 monsters to help is good, but not that impressive at such immensely overpowered heights. I'd say CR 48-50 is already plenty (remember the Phaethon is only CR 34. Maybe it would be CR 60 by the Hecatoncheires' standard, but the Hecatoncheires is already over-CRed, and at least they have half a brain). I don't know how much you can include good feat choice in the CR (your feats are miles ahead of the average in the ELH). Weird space too, since in 3.5 all Colossal creatures have a face of 30x30ft. Stupid norm (3.0 Leviathan weeps), but a norm nonetheless. That said, I see the update to the ELH have Devastation Vermin be 50x50 so maybe epic creatures break the rules.

That definitely should have been an Elder Evil, it having signs of apocalypse would not be out of place.

All-Consuming Rush (Ex):

Funny, a gnome that succeeds on this roll can move more than their speed just moving out of the way.

Aura of Utter Consumption (Su):

This is a fantastic ability. Everything in there is great. Adding something that actually suppresses the effect if they reach 0 CL as by an antimagic zone would make it slightly more encompassing.

Consume Space (Su):

Fun one.

Improved Grab (Ex):

As written, only works on Gargantuan or smaller creatures. You should specify it works on Colossal creatures.

Summon Epic Worms (Sp):

How long do they stay around? Are they controlled? Because honestly, them being uncontrolled but friendly would be much better than them being controlled by a creature with Int 3.

[Tzardok]

I'm a bit disappointed by the Zurrzirr's attacks. Only claws, really? I would have liked to see a scorpion stinger if you want to go the scorpion/dragonfly hybrid route. Not even a poison, or Improved Grab, or any rider at all? At least affecting a grappled creature with pollen every round would have given the zurrzirr a bit more personality.

The "scorpion" part of the description is mostly because it was the best way I could come up to say "it's got a long tail like a dragonfly, but it can move and bend it instead of being stiff". I also don't see why it should have Improved Grab or something like that; it's not a carnivore after all.

Can it do that at will? Isn't it out of pollen at one point? Does it eat the pollen itself? Does it have a hive? Does it willingly pollinate the flowers of the plane?

Yes, it can do so at will. I thought about having some kind of mechanic where it needs to "reload" pollen, but it got to complicated for no gain. So I went with the simple "whenever it needs pollen it has pollen". No, it feeds on the nectar of the flowers. No, it doesn't live in hives. It forms at best small packs. Pollinating is practically all it does.

I'd like to know more about its society, or, barring that, its life cycle. I don't know what makes it "wood plane"-ey, or why it can live in the plane of Air. As it is, it feels like a background monster with no reason to interact with the party. Overall, a bit disappointed by the monster, besides the name which is great.

I mean, its a horse-sized vermin that exists to pollinate impossibly large flowers, the kind you'd probably see on a world-tree. So it fits Wood, and it fits Air because it has too many wings and just the bare minimum of legs. I mean, I could take off the rest of the legs and have it have even more wings I guess.
But a bit more life cycle I can do. Do you like this additional paragraph:

Zurrzirrs are nectar drinkers. Their preferred flowers are those large enough that they can practically bath in them, covering themselves with pollen of all kind while sucking up the nectar at the ground. Zurrzirrs are usually solitary, but from packs if food is plentyful. As the Elemental Planes don't have seasons, zurrzirr matings don't happen periodical. Instead the formation of a pack triggers the mating instincts. Zurrzirr matings are preceded by acrobatic flight displays. After mating, the female lays sticky clumps of eggs at the undersides of the leaves of their food trees. The eggs hatch within two weeks and the nymphs, who are vegetarious, grow to full size and winged state within three months. Zurrzirrs live up to three years, less when mating often.

Sure, that's not a bad template. I'm a bit doubtful of the +0 LA. Burrow is generally slightly better than swim, and gaining +2 Str for -2 Dex is just asking for min-maxing. My first thought was that Water Orcs would love this template. Maybe you already thought about it by restricting it to non-humanoids, which I thought felt a bit artificial. Perhaps the type restriction is enough, but I'd consider removing the +2 Str to align this template with the Amphibious one.

Yeah, removing the Str is probably the right call. Fixed.

Like was already said, a very wholesome monster, with well-written appearance (I particularly like the mask-face), lore and personality. I very much likey. Agree with LA+5 (maybe +6), but I'd increase the CR to 7. Even if we don't count limited wish, there are slightly too many high-level SLAs for CR 6, especially on an Outsider. I chuckled at the fact that even the narrator got bored listing all the Huangdi's titles ^^ Also agree with how Calm Weather uses the 5e dispelling method, only requiring a roll if the targetted effect is of a higher level than the dispelling effect. Probably should have been the same in 3.5 as well.

CR increased. I'm glad you like them.

Urgh. One single ability on a 7 RHD creature, and it's a defensive one? The number of options of a monster should grow with its number of RHD. Here, there is no reason I can see not to only give it 3 or 4 RHD. Especially for a nice and playful species, 7 RHD seems kind of a lot. I'd like to know a few ways with which they use their natural talents to play pranks. How do they use Smoulder if not in combat (since they don't seem the fighting type)? "They supplement their diet smoked meat and vegetables." I think a "with" is missing here. Also, where do they find smoked meat? It's not that common either on the planes of Wood or Fire.

This may require me going over them again when I'm more focused. Regarding the meat, I'd assume that there are beasts that can be hunted and eaten on both sides.

Get better, you fiend!

Thank you, thank you. I do feel a bit better, though that cough is annoying.

Thank you for that, it's surprising that we don't have a leafy seadragon monster in the first place.

... Why?


... How?

Would you believe me that I came up with a great story about that, but after I sat down to actually design the creature, I'd already forgotten it?

Normalization remarks : Sea Serpents generally have their swim speed increased by increments of 20ft rather than 10ft,

That's intentional. Leafy appendages make good camouflage, but lousy streamlineshape.

and have all their SLAs on even-numbered age categories.

Switched a few around.

CR 2/3/5/7/9/11/12/14/16/17/19/21 ?

Thanks!

The fact that the Strength score increases by 4 at the age categories immediately following a size increase and not during the during increase triggers me slightly.

Huh. Didn't notice that... let's change it a bit.

Does it have hands? Generally creatures with no hands make pretty bad PCs. Still, +4 seems good if slightly high even for WotC, and I'd say CR 8.

Fun to have an evil creature made of Positive Energy, and the biblical references everywhere are very much appreciated. Love it all. I'd have gone even further and made it not that physically strong (since its physical attacks are lackluster anyway), but increasing its Cha even more to go with the "Father of Lies" aesthetic. Alternatively, lean into the serpent thing and give it Improved Grab on its bite, maybe with a Suggestion ability on grappled foe to emulate it wrapping around its prey and whispering in their ear. It already has fire and electricity resistance 10, why not go with acid and cold immunity to finish up the angel-like energy resistances?

I went with fire and electricity because of the energy types, these two feel very "positive" or "energetic" to me, while acid and cold are more "negative" or "decaying" (and sonic is neither nor). See also the Conqueror Worm being immune to acid and resistent to cold, but not to fire and electricity. Cha boost is a good idea, as is the whisper ability (I was looking for a way to bring in the Forked Tongue feat anyway; I wasn't sure if it would work with Apple of Discord).

"Any creature except other mala mala". So, this particular malum malum is affected by its own Apple of Discord, as written ^^
Why not add something like "and is compelled to use it at any occasion if applicable, such as donning an armor, striking with a weapon, eating affected foods and using affected magic item's special properties"? I feel like it would add even more to the ability.

Didn't think of it. The Apple of Discord is wanted for itself, it is usually not used. Still something to think about.

More of a compulsion, isn't it?

Is it? I find it more interesting as a charm. It's in a certain way like Charm Person. The base assumption of your thought is changed ("I like that person", "I want that thing"), but how you react to it is still you. Not only does that fit to the rider that codes of conduct and such aren't broken in the pursuit of the thing, I like the thought that people being good and less greedy stymies the malum malum.

How long does the fruit stay enchanted? One day? More? It would be fun to have the malum malum walk around with three apples of wisdom, one for itself to show it's harmless, one for Eve and one for Adam.

I think I imagined them being permanent, but that's probably too much. Three does fit, so I'll add a rider.

Gosh darnit, how are we even supposed to rate a CR 60 dumb stupid thing? Still, 60 seems a bit too much. Summoning two CR 33 monsters to help is good, but not that impressive at such immensely overpowered heights. I'd say CR 48-50 is already plenty (remember the Phaethon is only CR 34. Maybe it would be CR 60 by the Hecatoncheires' standard, but the Hecatoncheires is already over-CRed, and at least they have half a brain).

Wanted it to have a higher CR than any other abomination. So yes, that's the Hecatoncheires' standard. *shrug*

That definitely should have been an Elder Evil, it having signs of apocalypse would not be out of place.

If you can gate it to the Material, you can have it bring Signs.

Funny, a gnome that succeeds on this roll can move more than their speed just moving out of the way.

I'm imagening gnomes flying around like bowling pins.

This is a fantastic ability. Everything in there is great. Adding something that actually suppresses the effect if they reach 0 CL as by an antimagic zone would make it slightly more encompassing.

Didn't think it was needed. I usually assume that CL 0 or lower means it stops working. (Not even suppressed, but simply gone.)

As written, only works on Gargantuan or smaller creatures. You should specify it works on Colossal creatures.

Does it? The text says:

To use this ability, the Conqueror Worm must hit a creature with a bite attack. It can then attempt to start a grapple as a free action without provoking an attack of opportunity. If it wins the grapple check, it establishes a hold and can swallow the opponent whole.

Should affect all creatures, shouldn't it?

How long do they stay around? Are they controlled? Because honestly, them being uncontrolled but friendly would be much better than them being controlled by a creature with Int 3.

Creatures summoned by abominations stay 1 hour and are usually totally controlled. Still, good point. I'll add that (and double the number of summoned creatures just for fun).

[Beni-Kujaku]

I also don't see why it should have Improved Grab or something like that; it's not a carnivore after all.

Yeah, I know, I'm just a sucker for weird attacks beyond just rolling to hit and for damage (weird in the large sense of "anything happening after it hits", not specifically unheard of).

Zurrzirrs are nectar drinkers. Their preferred flowers are those large enough that they can practically bath in them, covering themselves with pollen of all kind while sucking up the nectar at the ground. Zurrzirrs are usually solitary, but from packs if food is plentyful. As the Elemental Planes don't have seasons, zurrzirr matings don't happen periodical. Instead the formation of a pack triggers the mating instincts. Zurrzirr matings are preceded by acrobatic flight displays. After mating, the female lays sticky clumps of eggs at the undersides of the leaves of their food trees. The eggs hatch within two weeks and the nymphs, who are vegetarious, grow to full size and winged state within three months. Zurrzirrs live up to three years, less when mating often.

"periodical*ly*", "Vegetari*an*"
The paragraph is perfect! It gives everything I like in a monster. Ecology, background events that can lead to plot hooks, and signs that you can put in your game for players to know that this monster is there. Amazing.

Would you believe me that I came up with a great story about that, but after I sat down to actually design the creature, I'd already forgotten it?

That, is tantalizing, sir.

I went with fire and electricity because of the energy types, these two feel very "positive" or "energetic" to me, while acid and cold are more "negative" or "decaying" (and sonic is neither nor). See also the Conqueror Worm being immune to acid and resistent to cold, but not to fire and electricity.

Oh, okay, I just thought it was an angel reference. Would have made even more biblical sense, but it's not necessary, the reference is already abundantly clear.

Cha boost is a good idea, as is the whisper ability (I was looking for a way to bring in the Forked Tongue feat anyway; I wasn't sure if it would work with Apple of Discord).

Happy to help! Yes, Forked Tongue specifies "through verbal means", which the Apple of Discord does not use. In that case, then Charm Monster would probably be better than Suggestion (since Forked Tongue specifies charm effects).

Didn't think of it. The Apple of Discord is wanted for itself, it is usually not used. Still something to think about.

Yes, but it would make sense to combine the ability with the Apple of Wisdom. And really be much more fun than just wanting to own the thing, which does not really mean much.

Is it? I find it more interesting as a charm. It's in a certain way like Charm Person. The base assumption of your thought is changed ("I like that person", "I want that thing"), but how you react to it is still you. Not only does that fit to the rider that codes of conduct and such aren't broken in the pursuit of the thing, I like the thought that people being good and less greedy stymies the malum malum.

Well, Sympathy is a compulsion effect, not a charm. There are really few effects with the charm descriptor, and nearly all of them are just variations of Charm Person/Monster/Animal. The rest are just captivating effects or inspiring bard spells (giving a bonus or a reroll). The only exception is Rapture of the Deep, which makes someone charmed by "the music of the Abyss" to the point that they do nothing except look in the distance. So either you're charmed by a person or by music, but never by an object (and honestly, I'd argue rapture of the deep could be a compulsion, like Coma).

I think I imagined them being permanent, but that's probably too much. Three does fit, so I'll add a rider.

I think permanent would be a bit much, since the malum malum is intelligent enough to gather a bunch of them. And it would be weird, since even apples don't last eternally once they fall off. Three days is good for me.

If you can gate it to the Material, you can have it bring Signs.

Yaaay!

Faint : Any dead creature starts rotting faster, becoming unfit for Raise Dead spells after one day. Spells that preserve them, such as Gentle Repose, require a DC 15 caster level check or fail to be cast.
Moderate : All food starts rotting in a few days, maggot appear in meat a few hours after a creature is killed. All Raise Dead spells automatically fail, and Resurrection spells only function for a week after death before the corpse is completely reduced to dust. Creatures of Venerable age make a Fort save (DC 10) each week or take one point of Con drain. Dragons in their Twilight make their Con save once per week instead of once per year.
Strong : Any food except fruits eaten directly from the tree and meat eaten directly from living creatures becomes unfit for consumption (treat eating enough food for one day as a poison with a DC 15 dealing 1d6 Con as initial and secondary damage). Old or older creatures must make a DC 15 Fort save every day or take 1 point of Con drain. All Great Wyrm dragons enter their Twilight (and must save every week).
Overwhelming : Creatures start rotting away while they're still alive. Plants and animals become poisonous and inedible (DC 15 poison, 1d6 Con/1d6 Con). Every day, all creatures take 1d6 Con damage. A DC 20 Fort save reduces the damage to 1 Con. Additionally, all dragons enter their Twilight and must save every day.

Didn't think it was needed. I usually assume that CL 0 or lower means it stops working. (Not even suppressed, but simply gone.)

For most things, it does (since the duration becomes 0, or the effect disappears for Fireball or similar spells), but Concentration spells generally do not care about that (see Silent Image, for example), and other weird spells do not care at all about caster level (Scorching Ray just throws one ray, but still works).

Does it? The text says:

Should affect all creatures, shouldn't it?

No. The description for Improved Grab says "Unless otherwise noted, improved grab works only against opponents at least one size category smaller than the creature.". In general, no size is specified, but it doesn't mean the Ankheg can Improved Grab a Colossal creature, for example.

Creatures summoned by abominations stay 1 hour and are usually totally controlled. Still, good point. I'll add that (and double the number of summoned creatures just for fun).

Because there is no kill quite like OVERKILL!