Funny Campaign Creation Help

[Looptwiss]

By Morodin's Beard! This is perhaps the best campaign setting about which I have ever read! Hilarity abound! Clever changes to myths and fables of childhood memory suited to mesh with the 3.5 world. LO! This campaign setting may find itself at my table within the fortnight! I AM OFF!

[Pronounceable]

Blatantly and shamelessly steal as much as you can from Discworld. Especially the early books.

[drawingfreak]

Thinking of putting together a Mime class. If this already exists, please help me find it.

The Mime
"I hate mimes." -anyone. No one likes mimes.

And now, you can hate mimes for a reason beyond their creepy exterior and silence. When these mimes perform, their gags become real. No one knows who discovered this ability, but mimes have been taught how to create actual invisible walls ever since.
Role: A mime's role in the party is that of a part trickster, part fighter, part spell caster. At first, no one will expect the mime of all things to actually do anything. Then when they are hit with an invisible club, they won't know what hit them, LITERALLY! (ba dum chish)
Organization: Mimes are all part of the MAMA (Mimes Against Mime Abuse) association. Their protests aren't well heard of. They're a quiet bunch. They trade secrets and information on their creations willingly and consider it flattery when other mimes use their ideas.
Races: Any race can be trained as a Mime. The most common are humans.
Religion: Mimes all believe in a god that follows some form of mimery. There is, however, St. Nottaclaoon (pronounced with a snooty French accent). He is the deity in charge of all mimes and mime-like actions.
Other Classes: While mimes tend to be friendly toward members of other classes, the other classes just don't care for mimes only because they are mimes. Mimes have their uses, though.

Game Information
Abilities: Charisma is the main stat for a mime as it is in charge of their Perform [Miming] checks. Dexterity is also good as it is used to control the mimed objects as well as add to the character's Armor Class.
Alignment: Any nonlawful. A mime is a free spirit who does what he pleases. This is rather unfortunate for the rest of us.
HD: d6

Class Skills
Balance (DEX), Bluff (CHA), Diplomacy (CHA), Escape Artist (DEX), Move Silently (DEX), Perform [Miming] (CHA), Sleight of Hand (DEX), and Tumble (DEX).
First Level: (4+INT mod)+4
Additional Levels: 4+INT mod

{table]Level|BaB|Fort|Ref|Will|Special|Mime-ings Per Day
1|+0|0|0|+2|Mime-ings, +1 Miming|5
2|+1|0|0|+3|+1 Miming|6
3|+2|+1|+1|+3||8
4|+3|+1|+1|+4|+1 Miming|9
5|+3|+1|+1|+4|+1 Miming|10
6|+4|+2|+2|+5||12
7|+5|+2|+2|+5|+1 Miming|13
8|+6/+1|+2|+2|+6|+1 Miming|14
9|+6/+1|+3|+3|+6||16
10|+7/+2|+3|+3|+7|+1 Miming|17
11|+8/+3|+3|+3|+7|+1 Miming|18
12|+9/+4|+4|+4|+8||20
13|+9/+4|+4|+4|+8|+1 Miming|21
14|+10/+5|+4|+4|+9|+1 Miming|22
15|+11/+6/+1|+5|+5|+9||24
16|+12/+7/+2|+5|+5|+10|+1 Miming|25
17|+12/+7/+2|+5|+5|+10|+1 Miming|26
18|+13/+8/+3|+6|+6|+11||28
19|+14/+9/+4|+6|+6|+11|+1 Miming|29
20|+15/+10/+5|+6|+6|+12|+1 Miming|30[/table]

Weapon Proficiencies
All simple and martial as long as they are mimed.
All light and medium armor and shields as long as they are mimed, including the Tower Shield.

Miming
Making a miming check: Perform Miming check DC=5 x object level
Others can make Perform Miming checks within the Mime Aura, but at a DC of (5 x object level)+10.
A Mimed object lasts for 1d6+CHA mod rounds or if it is Mimed away at a DC of 5.
A Mimed object can only exist within 15ft+5ft per CHA mod point. (Ranged weapons can damage past Mime Aura but the damage causing object disappears instantly afterwards.)
Cannot take 10 or 20 on performance checks.
Dexterity is used when calculating attacks and damage with Mimed weapons and when moving Mimed objects. Normal weapons and objects still require Strength.
Moves: (NEED HELP HERE...THESE ARE ALL ADJUSTABLE IF NEEDED)
Melee

• 1 ex: dagger
• 2
• 3 ex: longsword, +1 swortsword
• 4
• 5 ex: huge longsword

Ranged

• 1 ex: sling
• 2
• 3
• 4
• 5 ex: catapult

Defense

• 1 ex: buckler
• 2
• 3
• 4
• 5 ex: huge leather

Trap

• 1
• 2
• 3
• 4
• 5

Object

• 1
• 2
• 3
• 4
• 5

Penalties:
Miss Perform DC by:

• 5-1d2+CHA mod damage to HP
• 10-1d4+CHA mod damage to HP
• 15-1d6+CHA mod damage to HP. Loses 1d2+(current CHA mod) CHA points for 1d2 days
• Critical Fail-Character loses 1d8+ CHA mod HP and is unconscious for 1d2 rounds. Loses 1d4+(current CHA mod) CHA points for 1d4 days

[DracoDei]

Wise Old Hermit

• Mute: A Wise Old Hermit is incapable of speaking save for when he uses Wise Words.
  <SNIP>
• Favored Class: Cleric

Strictly read this means they need the "Silent Spell" feat and must apply it to all their spells... I would allow them to mutter unintelligibly under their breath or maybe shout total non-sense ("Pickle-squirrels were-radish fanging deathwish.")* for their verbal components as another exception to their muteness.

*Even in the worst moments I imagine "Words of Wisdom" making more sense than this... something along the lines of: "A halberd a day keeps the demilich away."

[drawingfreak]

Made the Mime post. ^

[DracoDei]

For what it is worth there was an issue of "Shoulin(sp) Showdown" that had a mime that seems to match the one you are trying to create...

[Uncle Festy]

This looks fun. I motion for the inclusion of "Summon Plot Exposition" and "Detect Plot Hook" spells, as well as the "Campaign Villan" template.

[Heliomance]

Don't forget the Craft Disturbing Mental Image feat. Although I feel that should be a skill - Craft (disturbing mental image)

[drawingfreak]

For what it is worth there was an issue of "Shoulin(sp) Showdown" that had a mime that seems to match the one you are trying to create...

...
Gong Yi Tanpai!

Sorry. If you can find it online, then please link it. I would love to see what they did. Right now, I need someway if telling the different levels of Mimery apart. I'm making it kind of like the Talent Trees in d20 modern.

[drawingfreak]

Another note:
As I continue making this world, it seems to be leaning more toward the Kingdom of Loathing form of humor and reference. And I'm ok with that.

Basically, nerd culture and pop culture references galore with no end in sight. Please keep this in mind as we continue and as you make suggestions.

CAMPAIGN IDEA:
The Hook: I'm not sure how the players are joined together, but I want them to find a Sahn'Ta Elf on the edge of death. He informs them that he escaped from a demon named Sahn'Ta and that his entire race are slaves. It is his dying wish that they destroy the demon once and for all. Thankfully, he has just enough energy left in him to tell them they need the Staff of Krin'Gul to defeat him. However, they cannot get to (location name under debate...something like Holiday Town or Holiday Land or something. It'll have various holiday references) by normal means of travel. They need to locate the scattered remains of Rudolf Hitler. It is ironic, because he was the reason the Elves summoned Sahn'Ta in the first place. Long genocidal story. I'll tell you later. Anywho, the remains are scattered and need to be located. Of course he will give a clue as to the location of the first piece of the Staff and to the first piece of Rudolf Hitler. Then he dies mysteriously.

Any suggestions? What next?

[Jolly Steve]

I have a table of plot ideas based on puns, which you might find useful.

It's at www.apolitical.info/webgame/tables , in the 'Adventure Ideas' section (right down the bottom).

[MrEdwardNigma]

Three things:
-I once made a mime class myself. They were mute casters who could summon invisible walls and such.
-Resembling Kingdom of Loathing is never a bad thing.
-When are you starting this campaign? I want in!

[Destro_Yersul]

I suggest an item along the line of "+(x) chocolates of yummy"

Anyone coming within 5ft of the chocolates must make a will save or eat one.

[Baxbart]

There are whole threads of stupid magic items going, such as this one: http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=65786

Definitely worth browsing through for some ideas.

[Uncle Festy]

I think we need a guild of wizards who think that the world is a game, and worship the almighty "game master" who they believe controls the world. Everyone thinks they're crazy, of course.
And yes, this is based just a bit off of RM from 8-bit, but more focus on the GM, and less on a guild of min-maxers.

[drawingfreak]

NEW MONSTER! He hails from the lands controlled by the evil Sahn'Tah.

{table]|The Rabbits of Cadburry
Size/Type|Diminutive Magical Animal
Hit Dice|1d10+1 (6 hp)
Speed|10ft. (2 squares)
Initiative|+2
Armor Class|16 (+4 size, +2 Dex), touch 16, ff 14
Base Attack/Grapple|+1/-16
Attack|Slam +0 melee (1) or Bite +0 melee (1d2)
Full Attack|Slam +0 melee (1) or Bite +0 melee (1d2)
Space/Reach|1 ft./0
Special Attacks|none
Special Qualities|Darkvision 60ft., Low-light vision, Magic Egg Laying
Saves|Fort +3, Ref +4, Will -4
Abilities|STR 1, DEX 15, CON 12, INT -, WIS 3, CHA 14
Skills|-
Feats|Run
Environment|Hawl’Edaeland
Organization|Solitary, or Pairs
Challenge Rating|1
Treasure|see Magic Egg Laying notes
Alignment|Good
Advancement|2-4 HD (Diminutive), 5-8 (Tiny)
Level Adjustment|-[/table]

Magic Egg Laying
The monster is supplied with standard treasure. HOWEVER, this treasure comes inside a chocolate egg that the rabbit lays in its final moments of life.

[drawingfreak]

As I will be playing this at my college for the next two quarters every Friday (starting January 11), I will be needing to break this campaign up over 18 weeks (or days if you prefer to see it that way). Week 1 and Week 18 are easy. I just need some assistance in splitting the game up over the Fridays.

Week 1
Introduction to the In-Sahn'Tah-ty
The players will start at level 4. Like every good RPG, I will have the player's begin by fighting rabbits. Nothing special about them. Just rabbits. Thus, the game starts with combat in Bakerwood Forest.

At the end of combat, they stumble upon an escapee from the slave driven Hawl’Edaeland. {{Listen DC 10/Spot DC 15}} He is a Sahn'Tah elf, as opposed to Keh'Blur and Cah'Blur. The elfs will be the only ones who can tell the difference, and are offended should anyone else not see it. {{INT DC 30, each race wears a separate color. Keh'Blurs wear Blue, Cah'Blurs wear Red, and Sahn'Tahs wear Green. Also, the nose is shaped slightly differently. Keh'blurs are rounder, Cah'Blurs are pointier, and Sahn'Tahs are in the middle.}}

The Sahn'Tah elf is injured and sick, on the edge of death. He introduces himself as Hermey and requests that the players stop the evil Sahn'Tah and that due to his Expositionitis (an incurable disease {{that means Clerics have no power to stop it}} caused by traveling in between planes of existence without the proper training), he must give them all the information they need before finally finding peace in the afterlife.

He tells them of the Staff of Krin'Gul. It is an item of power so...er...powerful that it can "de-level", if such a thing as levels existed, Sahn'Tah, making him defeatable. It is created by combining 4 items (number of items subject to change): the Snow-globe of E. Frost {{location undecided}}, Starheart Metal, the Bracelet of Sir Richard of Simones, and a big stick fashioned from the wood of a Bakerwood tree bearing the mark of all the good races.

However, to save themselves from the horrors of Expositionitis, they will need a guide to Hawl’Edaeland. Centuries ago, there was an evil tyrant by the name of Rudolf...*pause for dramatic effect*...Hitler. He brought many an elf to Hawl’Edaeland to force them to work the toimetal mines and then would commit acts of genocide against them as well. Millions of elves died. Some elves became so desperate, they dared summon a beast of jolly red evil to stop the reign of Rudolf Hitler. Sahn'Tah did as they wished, scattering Rudolf Hitler's remains to the five corners of the world.

The players must therefore collect the pieces of Rudolf Hitler {{locations undecided}}, and find a way to return his spirit to it so that they may have a guide through the planer rifts to Hawl’Edaeland.

With all said and done, Hermey finally dies. That night, the group of players see a shooting star land a large mountain in the east. They must travel through the Gumdrop Gorge, brave the Gingerbread Men infested Frosting Hills, and survive the climb to the top of the Big Rock Candy Mountain to retrieve the first item: the Starheart Metal.
[/Endofunbearablylongstoryidea]

This may be a bit much to do in the first week alone. With the trials of the Gumdrop Gorge, the delicious Gingerbread Men, the Undead Charlie Horse, the temptations of the Big Rock Candy Mountain, and the fierce beast that lives in the peak...not to mention the time it takes to create the characters and the initial hunt for the rabbits (I plan on having 6)...it seems like a lot.

What I need:

• locations for the different collectibles
• sidequests to fill in time if needed
• more collectible ideas to add to the Staff of Krin'Gul if need be
• how to divide the body of Rudolf Hitler
• assistance splitting the quest over 18 Fridays