A Monster for Every Season: Summer 2
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  1. - Top - End - #1
    Dwarf in the Playground
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    Default The Order of the Stick: July! (>'.')>

    Wow. Forget my previous theory, we're not even gonna NEED divine intervention to mess with this relationship :P

    That said, Durkon's look on the last panel is priceless.

    So what are the odds that Hilgya is still around by the time they get back to the party?

    The Voice of Mod: Edited the "teh" out of the title. There will be no use of l334 on my board! :P ;)

    The Voice of the Dude who Made the Topic: It's not l33t, merely a little rearrangement of letters! But if you insist...however, Kirby insisted on making an appearance.

  2. - Top - End - #2
    Halfling in the Playground
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    Default Re: The Order of the Stick: July! (>'.')>

    Hilgya's Chaotic is showing...

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    Halfling in the Playground
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    Default Re: The Order of the Stick: July! (>'.')>

    So is her Evil!!

    What's the odds that hubby is from Durkon's clan?

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    Halfling in the Playground
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    Default Re: The Order of the Stick: July! (>'.')>

    or a close relation... hehe

    go go married harlot!

  5. - Top - End - #5
    Dwarf in the Playground
     
    Flumph

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    Default Re: The Order of the Stick: July! (>'.')>

    Is that Durkon, or Michael Douglas?

    I guess I feel most sorry for Ivan...he was sweet, but she tried to (apparently repeatedly) poison him...yikes.
    Any sufficiently analyzed magic is indistinguishable from SCIENCE!

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    Halfling in the Playground
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    Default Re: The Order of the Stick: July! (>'.')>

    It's only been established that she's Chaotic, not nessessarily Evil.

    Granted, Poisoning someone is usually considered evil, but if she was really, really pissed off enough... I mean, she said she coulden't stand the guy...

  7. - Top - End - #7
    Dwarf in the Playground
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    Default Re: The Order of the Stick: July! (>'.')>

    Nah. Maybe I'm biased, but I doubt a chaotic evil character would be able to restrain themselves long enough to manage something like this. It would be more like... "Oh look, there's a cute little bunny hopping through the dungeon. FLAMESTRIKE! Muahahahahaha! How I love the smell of burning fur in the morning!"

    Of course, I could be prejudiced since the other folks I roleplay with once made themselves a chaotic evil party, that proceeded to slaughter entire towns just for the fun of it...
    I am... no one.

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    Dwarf in the Playground
     
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    Default Re: The Order of the Stick: July! (>'.')>

    Crossbow wedding, huh? ;)

    Well, part of me says "I can see this won't work out. I remember when Fry (in Futuruama) was having a good time with Amy until she said, "I like hanging out with you", and then he freaked out. Could be something like that"

    Part of me thinks of Vir (from Babylon 5) who was engaged to be married to a woman, who was nice and pleasant and charming, but also killed hundreds of Narns and blankly thought nothing of the fact. "Maybe we can work it out. All relationships have problems."

    ;) Either way, it's going to be funny, and one heck of a ride, I think.


    To Strive, To Seek, To Find, And Not To Yield

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    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    OldWizardGuy

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    Default Re: The Order of the Stick: July! (>'.')>

    Ah, yes, Durkon's first glimpse of the Wonderful World of Intimate Relationships.

    First, there's the fun.
    Then come the nightmarish revelations and the crushing responsibilities.

    Just imagine the new things he'll experience if Hilgya is now with child! Oh, the things he'll do and the places he'll go!
    Alignments are objective. Right and wrong are not.
    Good: Will act to prevent harm to others even at personal cost.
    Evil: Will seek personal benefit even if it causes harm to others.
    Law: General, universal, and consistent trump specific, local, and inconsistent.
    Chaos: Specific, local, and inconsistent trump general, universal, and consistent.

  10. - Top - End - #10
    Titan in the Playground
     
    Starbuck_II's Avatar

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    Default Re: The Order of the Stick: July! (>'.')>

    She is either Chaotic Evil or Chaotic Neutral.
    Neurtal would be alignment if she didn't think of Poison herself.

    If an outside force motivates you toward evil act then you are Chaotic Neutral, but if yu think of it yourself you are evil!

    Its what the Player's handbook says :P

    Fry married once didn't he? Fish girl but she couldn't put out. (Fish don't have sex sadly)

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    Alarra's Avatar

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    Default Re: The Order of the Stick: July! (>'.')>

    Fry did indeed marry. Hey cool! I've actually seen that episode. I have seen so few episodes of that show that the fact that I can actually comment on one amazes me.

    I was outzombied by the baby!
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    Quote Originally Posted by Amotis View Post
    Alarra ate all my awesome and now she's always acknowledged as awe-inspiring awesome. Alliteration aside, Alarra is awesome.

  12. - Top - End - #12
    Dwarf in the Playground
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    Default Re: The Order of the Stick: July! (>'.')>

    Quote Originally Posted by ShadowDragon8685
    Granted, Poisoning someone is usually considered evil, but if she was really, really pissed off enough... I mean, she said she coulden't stand the guy...
    The guy seemed like a nice person, though, and it seemed like she was overreacting. Offering someone a foot massage doesn't really qualify as "crushing their spirit", methinkupos

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    Bugbear in the Playground
     
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    Default Re: The Order of the Stick: July! (>'.')>

    Quote Originally Posted by Starbuck_II
    Fry married once didn't he? Fish girl but she couldn't put out. (Fish don't have sex sadly)
    Which of course leads us to ask "How do merfolk make babies?"
    “I promise, we will find all your moms. And I'm gonna tell!.”- Wonder Woman

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    Giant in the Playground Administrator
     
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    Default Re: The Order of the Stick: July! (>'.')>

    Quote Originally Posted by Starbuck_II
    She is either Chaotic Evil or Chaotic Neutral.
    Neurtal would be alignment if she didn't think of Poison herself.

    If an outside force motivates you toward evil act then you are Chaotic Neutral, but if yu think of it yourself you are evil!
    Fascinating, but quite untrue. A character does not become Evil the moment they think of or perform an Evil action. Whether or not you think of something yourself is also irrelevent; there is no "I was following orders" exception on Evil acts.
    Rich Burlew


    A Monster for Every Season: Summer 2, the sixth set of monster miniatures for your tabletop game—now including digital tokens to use in your favorite virtual tabletop. Available from Gumroad!

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    Bugbear in the Playground
     
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    Default Re: The Order of the Stick: July! (>'.')>

    ...Unless you're under a Geas.
    “I promise, we will find all your moms. And I'm gonna tell!.”- Wonder Woman

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    Retired Mod in the Playground Retired Moderator
     
    Alarra's Avatar

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    Default Re: The Order of the Stick: July! (>'.')>

    Quote Originally Posted by Scorpina
    Which of course leads us to ask "How do merfolk make babies?"
    They had an explanation for that...which is what made Fry freak out in the first place....sadly i cannot remember what it was.

    I was outzombied by the baby!
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    Quote Originally Posted by Amotis View Post
    Alarra ate all my awesome and now she's always acknowledged as awe-inspiring awesome. Alliteration aside, Alarra is awesome.

  17. - Top - End - #17
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
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    Default Re: The Order of the Stick: July! (>'.')>

    Well, you see, the male fish ejects his seed into the water, and the female absorbs it into her egg sac, fertilizing them in the process.

    There was also the episode that Fry made it with his grandmother.
    "Yep, I did the nasty in the pasty."

    >_>
    <_<

    Who thinks that Helgya is actually Durkon's grandmother?
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    Dwarf in the Playground
     
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    Default Re: The Order of the Stick: July! (>'.')>

    Well, not to side track this any more than need be, but she would lay the eggs and Fry would pass over them and fertilize them.

    (cut to Fry running from the merbabe's home as fast as possible)

    (got all 5 seasons, seen them more times than I care to admit ;) Course I could be wrong... I've only seen that episode twice )

    back on topic: I would so not want to be Durkon right now. In all likelyhood the term "screwed" just took on a whole new meaning for him. ;D

    (okay a bit out of line, but I couldn't resist)


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  19. - Top - End - #19
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Scorpina's Avatar

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    Default Re: The Order of the Stick: July! (>'.')>

    "Oh great, a lesson in not changing history from Mr. I'm My Own Grampa!" ;D

    Wouldn't Helgya be significantly older than Durkon, if that were the case?
    “I promise, we will find all your moms. And I'm gonna tell!.”- Wonder Woman

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  20. - Top - End - #20
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
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    Default Re: The Order of the Stick: July! (>'.')>

    Well, dwarves are all funky anyway. I'm surprised she doesn't have a beard of some sort. :P
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  21. - Top - End - #21
    Pixie in the Playground
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    Default Re: The Order of the Stick: July! (>'.')>

    I would place her Alignment as Chaotic Neutral. She is completely and blindly self-centered, to the extent that she interpreted her Husband's actions as truly 'stifling.'

    She chose poison, not because she is 'evil' - her actions were really not intended to cause harm for the sake of causing harm, or because she held real malice for her husband, but rather she is so selfish that she simply chose the most expedious option to get what she wants - in this case it would be her husband's death, and when that failed, chose the next most expedious option, to run away.

  22. - Top - End - #22
    Pixie in the Playground
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    Default Re: The Order of the Stick: July! (>'.')>

    Quote Originally Posted by BollaertN
    I would place her Alignment as Chaotic Neutral. She is completely and blindly self-centered, to the extent that she interpreted her Husband's actions as truly 'stifling.'

    She chose poison, not because she is 'evil' - her actions were really not intended to cause harm for the sake of causing harm, or because she held real malice for her husband, but rather she is so selfish that she simply chose the most expedious option to get what she wants - in this case it would be her husband's death, and when that failed, chose the next most expedious option, to run away.
    Selfishness to the extent that you will kill others for your own benifit is Evil in D&D3.x terms.

    To quote the rules: "Some evil creatures simply have no compassion for others and kill without qualms if doing so is convenient."

    Sounds like what we see to me.

    CE does not mean ravening maniac any more than CN means insane.

  23. - Top - End - #23
    Halfling in the Playground
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    Default Re: The Order of the Stick: July!

    Ah poor Durkon, I would be very careful around her now ("Eh.. A sanwich? May I cast Detect Poison? Whaddaya mean 'no'!?").

    I so hope that he leaves in the middle of the night, rejoins the Order (of the Stick) and declares that Elan will have to take his role as cleric. ALL BOW TO BANJO THE CLOWN ("He's called Banjo because he has a litte...." "Yeah I get it")


    EDIT: Lets dance!

    (>'.')> <('.'<)
    Looking for an online D&D game... email me if you have something. please?

  24. - Top - End - #24
    Pixie in the Playground
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    Default Re: The Order of the Stick: July! (>'.')>

    Quote Originally Posted by DougL

    Selfishness to the extent that you will kill others for your own benifit is Evil in D&D3.x terms.

    To quote the rules: "Some evil creatures simply have no compassion for others and kill without qualms if doing so is convenient."
    While that is true, and equally as valid an interpretation, I still tend to give her the benefit of the doubt, because her outlook seems more capricious than steadafstly evil. I suppose the argument could be made she's on the cusp of both Alignments.

    Generally speaking, Alignments in D&D are objective rather than subjective, so you can definitely make a strong case for Evil.

    But for me the matter of her apparent lack of insight is a potential mitigating factor. For example, if she REALLY believed that her husban doting on her, loving her, and trusting her, was indicative that he was a horrible person out to crush her spirit, I would doubt she has the mental capacity to choose evil. In modern parlance, she might be a sociopath or otherwise clinically mentally ill. And while she may be capable of great acts that are evil, I tend to reserve the title of Evil for those whose actions are not mitigated by mental imbalance.

    On the other hand, this is a lot of deep speculation for a well-drawn stick figure comic strip, deisgned to be humorous, so I freely admit I'm reading WAY too much into it :-)

  25. - Top - End - #25
    Pixie in the Playground
     
    Tzor's Avatar

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    Default Re: The Order of the Stick: July! (>'.')>

    Crossbow wedding? I'm seeing a good case for an annulment here. My guess is that this happened before her conversion to Loki, but if not that's also grounds for an annulment, since I doubt that any priests of Loki would officiate at the crossbow wedding of a priestess of Loki.

    Of course the poisoning the husband is a bummer.

    On the other hand, she choose Durkon of her own free will, so she might be safe as long as you do the cooking and never ever ask if she wants her feet massaged.

    Still, there's no reason they can't be "friends." ;D

  26. - Top - End - #26
    Pixie in the Playground
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    Default Re: The Order of the Stick: July! (>'.')>

    Quote Originally Posted by Tzor
    Still, there's no reason they can't be "friends." ;D
    Friends with Benefits, even! :-p

    However, I suspect this will not end well.

  27. - Top - End - #27
    Dwarf in the Playground
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    Default Re: The Order of the Stick: July! (>'.')>

    Quote Originally Posted by BollaertN
    However, I suspect this will not end well.
    Mmm. Since there's all this talk about Futurama (which I love also), lemme throw in a Bender quote that sums up what is probably going to happen, any way you slice it:

    "Comedy's a dead artform. Now tragedy...heh, heh, heh, THAT's funny."

  28. - Top - End - #28
    Dwarf in the Playground
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    Default Re: The Order of the Stick: July! (>'.')>

    Okay, it's right-wing, fundamentalist religion time here in the Not-so-Okie-dokie Corral!

    So, what happened here? Durkon listened to the voice of temptation, and succumbed to the evils of un-married intimacy! For shame, for shame, thus shall he be verily punished!

    BUT!!!!!

    He can't die the heinous death he doth truly deserve, due to the fact that he's not Janet Leigh. But already he is seeing how badly he's erred, and already he's realizing the depth of his sin.

    So, Hilgya (sorry, didn't remember the spelling) is due for a cosmic-sized put down, so that we can all learn the lesson that out-of-wedlock intimacy, even if it is of the sweet dwarven kind, must never be tolerated, and thusly shall all who engage in it be punished.

    Wow, I never knew right-wing, religous fundemtalist ranting could be so invigorating! Who's got a beer?

  29. - Top - End - #29
    Dwarf in the Playground
     
    Flumph

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    Default Re: The Order of the Stick: July! (>'.')>

    "Why couldn't she be the one with the fishy part on top, and the lady part on bottom?" -Fry

    Then later:

    "Well, I found that I loved her, but I wasn't IN love with her" -Fry
    whispering"Trouble in bed" - Amy
    *nods* - Leela

    And my all time favorite Bender quote: "Life is hilariously cruel".
    Any sufficiently analyzed magic is indistinguishable from SCIENCE!

  30. - Top - End - #30
    Pixie in the Playground
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    Default Re: The Order of the Stick: July! (>'.')>

    Poor, poor Durkon. I really feel sorry for him. There's just so many problems: the "already married" thing, the fact that she seems either CN or CE, and I think he's LG, her interpretation of foot massages as unkind, the opposed deities . . .

    Of course, because I'm a hopeless romantic, I think this will all work out. But it probably won't.

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