Things that make your GM hate you

[JMobius]

You know, those dastardly tricks that you pull out of nowhere that break their rails, ruin their plans, and foil all their attempts to kill you.

Last weekend, I broke out a DMM Maximized Celestial Brilliance cast by a Radiant Servant of Pelor, in a world being assaulted by a zombie plague. That one earned a round of applause from everyone, including the GM, who shortly thereafter hit me with an Eternity of Torment.

I got better though.

[Adumbration]

Where's the Celestial Brilliance from? (Also, you could just simply add what it exactly means to those of use who can't be bothered checking three books. )

Sounds good, though.

[Da King]

Lets see..... I have:
1. In a Campaign, we were given a series of weapons which I figured out were made out of some sort of radioactive material. I tried to build a nuke, and the DM ended up rewinding the timeline of the campaign back 2 weeks so we never found the weapons.
2. Helped a fellow PC burn down a forest, while transporting a caravan of explosives through it.
3. Attempted to kill a party member with explosives, and blew up half an inn.
4. Succeeded in killing said party member with explosives, and destroyed an entire cave.
5. Burned down and looted several magic shops.
6. Played a Druid, and incorrectly read many rules.
7. Creatively used stone shape and wood shape far too often.
8. Took over a town and named it "Fresca" after the drink that happened to be sitting on the table.
9. Failed at management of background music.
10. And Finally, destroyed every adventure hook the DM threw at us.

[Vexxation]

Where's the Celestial Brilliance from? (Also, you could just simply add what it exactly means to those of use who can't be bothered checking three books. )

Sounds good, though.

Book of Exalted Deeds.

120-foot burst (doubled for Radiant Servant). Lasts 1 day per caster level, dealing d6 damage per round to undead in the inner 60 feet (120 feet for Radiant Servants).

Maximized it's dealing 6 damage per round to every undead within 120 feet of the affected object. It'll last at least 13 days (required to cast a level 7 spell, or a level 4 maximized). A round is 6 seconds. A day is 86,400 seconds. 13 days is 1,123,200 seconds. This gives you 187,200 rounds. Each round deals 6 damage to everything undead in 120 feet.

I like it.

[Jade_Tarem]

3. Attempted to kill a party member with explosives, and blew up half an inn.

Half? You're doing it wrong.

[JMobius]

It'll last at least 13 days (required to cast a level 7 spell, or a level 4 maximized).

10 days. It was DMM maximized. ;)

[Vexxation]

10 days. It was DMM maximized. ;)

Ah. I've heard that DMM was cheesy but never investigated how so. In which book might one find such cheese?

[arguskos]

I've done a few good ones.

1. I helped another player (who was a vampire) utterly annihilate a temple of St. Cuthbert by teleporting us in, having him kick the door in, casting Acid Storm on the whole place (melting everything inside, save the one guy he wanted to turn into another vamp), and teleporting myself away, just in time to get back to the bar for the next round of ales.

2. I took the Firey Burst reserve feat (create fire at will pretty much) in a campaign that turned out to have way too many plant-based monsters and boats.

3. I abused the fact that I knew the spell descriptions better than he did, and made good use of that fact (for example, the fact that Dimension Door doesn't need a target, just a direction+distance, so if I knew exactly how far away the treasure vault was...)

4. I helped a player abuse magnetism, and single-handedly invented an electro-magnet, which we then used in an imitation of Mystery Men (basically, mount an electro-magnet to a vehicle, charge into a heavily defended castle, and turn on the magnet till everyone is incapacitated, then leap out and kill everyone).

I'm sure there are more, but I can't recall any at the moment.

-argus

Also, Divine Metamagic is in Complete Divine if I recall.

[Vexxation]

Also, Divine Metamagic is in Complete Divine if I recall.

Yup, Complete Divine, and man, is that sexy.
Especially where it doesn't say you have to have a metamagic to choose it.

Though I'm sure that's errata'd out.

[JMobius]

Ah. I've heard that DMM was cheesy but never investigated how so. In which book might one find such cheese?

Complete Divine.

Some of these are really good. Let's keep them coming. :D

[arguskos]

Yeah, if I recall, DMM was errata'd to make you pick a metamagic, I think in... Magic of Faerun? Or Player's Guide to Faerun maybe? However, it most assuredly has been so errata'd. Also, taking Persistent Spell is just CHEESE. >_<

Oh, another one: I once helped to start a world-consuming war when my party and I killed off a king, and installed a puppet ruler that we controlled behind the scenes. Also, that puppet was an elder orb beholder that we befriended. Needless to say, this didn't make us any friends among everyone else in the world, esp. when we launched on a holy crusade to purge the globe of heretics (we were a super-righteous party, and thought we'd converted the beholder to goodness... man, were we wrong...).

-argus

[Chronicled]

As a Beguiler, spamming Detect Thoughts with the "don't think about elephants!" tactic. And the Conceal Spellcasting skill trick (essentially, free Still+Silent on your spell, usable once minute with a Sleight of Hand check).

As a Cleric, making heavy use of Shape Stone to leave statues all over the landscape with "St. Cuthbert is better than your god." inscribed on the bottom.

As a different Beguiler, managing epic Bluff checks at level 6 (yay Glibness!).

And I knew that my DM was ticked at my level 1 Sorcerer's Grease on his skeleton boss's sword when as a replacement, a Brilliant Energy sword appeared in its hand . And promptly took out our meleers . (Had that campaign gone on, he probably would have killed me and only allowed a Warmage or Healer as caster options for me. His idea of caster play was like the alleged style of the development team.)

More to come.

[Dausuul]

I'm not usually too much of a problem player, but there was this one campaign...

First, we met a well-connected fellow with a plot hook. Instead of accepting the plot hook, I killed him. Given the fellow's connections, we then decided it would be wise to skip town, thus invalidating the entire plot.

Later, in another town, we were hired to retrieve some stolen magic items from under a mountain (it was the 3E remake of White Plume Mountain, for anyone interested). I used an area attack in an inadvisable location, and collapsed the mountain. Although some generous rulings on the workings of dimension door allowed us to avoid being crushed to death, the magic items were lost for good, and we decided to skip town again.

Finally, we managed to get a goddess pissed off at us after we inadvertently killed her last paladin. Possibly the DM was anticipating that we would skip town again and we'd have some kind of "escape the goddess's wrath" plot. Instead, I led the party in converting to the worship of that goddess.

The campaign ended shortly after that.

[Thrawn183]

Can we post ones we plan to do?

[Chronicled]

Finally, we managed to get a goddess pissed off at us after we inadvertently killed her last paladin. Possibly the DM was anticipating that we would skip town again and we'd have some kind of "escape the goddess's wrath" plot. Instead, I led the party in converting to the worship of that goddess.

That? Awesome.

[Conners]

Lets see..... I have:
1. In a Campaign, we were given a series of weapons which I figured out were made out of some sort of radioactive material. I tried to build a nuke, and the DM ended up rewinding the timeline of the campaign back 2 weeks so we never found the weapons.
2. Helped a fellow PC burn down a forest, while transporting a caravan of explosives through it.
3. Attempted to kill a party member with explosives, and blew up half an inn.
4. Succeeded in killing said party member with explosives, and destroyed an entire cave.
5. Burned down and looted several magic shops.
6. Played a Druid, and incorrectly read many rules.
7. Creatively used stone shape and wood shape far too often.
8. Took over a town and named it "Fresca" after the drink that happened to be sitting on the table.
9. Failed at management of background music.
10. And Finally, destroyed every adventure hook the DM threw at us.

.......... LOL XD XD LOLOLOLOL!!!! Man... I'm tempted to invite you over to some of my campaigns, but I don't think I'm good enough yet to work out how to counter your bizarreness (I see little problem with naming your town after a soda, it's YOUR fre**in' town!).

[Totally Guy]

I've been thwarted as a DM by my players 3 weeks before the campaign is even going to start.

On Saturday, more like early sunday morning... we finally finished our 3.5 campaign in which I was a player. Anyway the ending of our campaign used nearly exactly the same twist that I was going to use when I took over.

When they get so far into the story I have planned they'll all stop and say, "You ripped that concept off from our last game!" I have a log book that I can use to prove I thought of it independently. Still annoying though. Maybe I'll make adjustments.

[Pie Guy]

Continually using darkness to knock monsters into lava, whichwas a good thing, as there was only a monk (me), a drow assassin(providing the dark), an almost always absent cleric, and a wu jen, who was consequently tripped into lava by the attack made on me by the assassin. the cleric was not availible for comment.

[Naihal]

Link to the Things I am not allowed to do while gaming thread, because it's in the same vein and because it must never be forgotten.

In my current campaign, the DM has thrown my group into some bizzare plane infested with undead. Somehow, it's not connected to the rest of the cosmology, meaning we can't escape with plane shift. Our current goal is to find a way off, and last session we infiltrated the main base of a cult spread across the plane in order to find what they knew about the properties of the plane. We successfully made it into the center of their base and retrieved their records, and were about to leave when the DMPC stopped us.

The DMPC, a nycter paladin, was determined to wait until the cult members came and found us so that he could slaughter them for their "vile worship." Naturally, no one else was interested, so my wizard made the nycter an offer: the rest of the party would leave and hide a short distance away and watch how the nycter's fight went; when he dropped to low health, my wizard would cast regroup to teleport the nycter out. The nycter agreed, and ran off to start his fight while the rest of the party ran off out of the base. The nycter managed to take down a good portion of the cult's forces (and about half an hour of real time while the DM DMed the battle between his own PC and his NPCs) but was still knocked down to near critical health. My wizard cast regroup as planned.

It didn't work.

As the DM had made sure to point out several times previously, the plane we were on was cut off from all others, including the Astral Plane - meaning teleport spells didn't work. The nycter perished at the hands of the cult, and the rest of the party got away without a scratch. I can only imagine how the DM will take revenge on my character.

[Quirinus_Obsidian]

1: Playing a Large or larger sized character. This will also make your other players hate you. As most corridors and hallways are 8ft. high and 10 ft wide... that means you take up all and then some of the available space. Imagine a character that size in a aquatic environment, like Savage Tide?

2: Playing the same character, over and over and over again, ad nauseum. Sure they may have different feats, some different class abilities, but if all of them have the same personality or behavior, that gets really old.

----------------
Now playing: The Gathering - In Motion #2
via FoxyTunes

[valadil]

Oh, where to begin... Let's go with character back story.

Wrote background in spanish. In my defense the character was mexican.

Gave character surname of "DeJesus" just to see if DM would notice.

For my cannibalistic jungle Dwarf barbarian, Bucky duForrest, I downloaded an old SNL sketch script and replaced every instance of "Bill" with "Bucky" and "Brasky" with "duForrest." GM didn't notice. (For you youngins, the sketch was about a bunch of drunk guys talking about the epic feats of their buddy Bill Brasky and was later ripped off by Chuck Norris facts.)

Gave DM a copy of the "Eye of Argon" with Jim Theiss crossed out and another PC's name written in. Made DM read it out loud.

[quiet1mi]

changeling + beguiler + high cha + imagination = off the rails in 30 seconds flat

[Roderick_BR]

Funny, most tales here would mean instant death to the PCs in some groups I played... Your DMs are too nice to you, people

[EndgamerAzari]

2: Playing the same character, over and over and over again, ad nauseum. Sure they may have different feats, some different class abilities, but if all of them have the same personality or behavior, that gets really old.

*face of intense hate*

My 'friend' Johnny has, by my record, played seven MUTE SAMURAI characters.

[Gem Flower]

Blindness spell. It's low-level and very fun. Biggest climactic battle = Everyone delaying their turns until after mine, I cast Blindness, someone else does a coup de grace. Eventually he stopped letting us use it, though.

[Jade_Tarem]

Blindness spell. It's low-level and very fun. Biggest climactic battle = Everyone delaying their turns until after mine, I cast Blindness, someone else does a coup de grace. Eventually he stopped letting us use it, though.

Being blind doesn't subject you to coup de grace. You have to be helpless. The blind guy can be sneak attacked, though.

[MR.PIXIE]

I am the GM... but somthing i hate is when im like " okay you turn the coner of the damp halway and see three--" then im interupted by the archer who says " Does 27 hit?" "umm...*checks* yeah" "SNEAK ATTACK!!" Totaly ruins the game.

[Adumbration]

I am the GM... but somthing i hate is when im like " okay you turn the coner of the damp halway and see three--" then im interupted by the archer who says " Does 27 hit?" "umm...*checks* yeah" "SNEAK ATTACK!!" Totaly ruins the game.

Well, I do bet it came as a surprise.

[Destro_Yersul]

My favourite was spamming Backbiter, or whatever it's called, on everything with a weapon. Our DM was fond of using monsters that did absurd amounts of damage, you see. It was even better when I did it to an ogre, who managed to crit and one-shotted himself.

[TheCountAlucard]

One time, I was in a truly bad solo game; the DM played it like a cutscene, made my first-level bard (with the wealth of a fifth-level bard and a GOLEM servant) a general in the king's army (which was then defeated, no dice rolled, with my bard "knocked out from behind"). I woke up in a dungeon with the princess (nine levels higher than me) on a quest to find the king.

I fell asleep.