Dancing Fox Inn LVII: New Thread for the New Decade

[Viera Champion]

((Banner by Celtois))

Welcome to the Dancing Fox Inn! Come and try our one of a kind beverages and food, chat with friends, or grab a private room and relax. All are welcome to the Dancing Fox Inn. (Except those nasty rust monsters. Not ALL rust monsters, just those.)

We would like to ask, please, no smoking in the establishment unless you are on fire. We understand that there are often exceptions. Thank you for understanding. Be sure to enjoy your stay.
White Text is back! Mocking your memes!
If your characters are upstairs, please use this thread to avoid confusing the other occupants
Comment on the previous thread's white text.
Map:
There is no map. The Inn has as much space as is needed, as many tables as is needed, as many rooms as needed (Upstairs), as many corners as needed, and so on.
There is, however, a description:
No way, but I do Feel Fantastic.
Description:

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The inn is . . . indescribable. Size wise, anyway. It has as many tables as needed, and as many chairs as needed. So that needn't be said as well.
However, the floors have been . . . completely changed.
They were rough hewn logs. They are now laminated hardwood. All of the broken, dirty glasses and silverware have been removed, and replaced with better, more functional (And clean) ones. The kitchen is, by far, the best room in the inn. Sparklingly clean, the best equipment out there, and so on. The entire inn has been renovated. It is now made of better wood, and is much cleaner. It's not the prettiest building in the town, but it's functional. Which is what counts.
Also, any damage done to the inn will fix itself by the next day. So don't worry.

Disclaimer: The only thing changing about the inn is the size. So it will allow anyone in. And will supply as many corners as needed. Nothing else is changing. And it never does change. It just . . . you watch it, it . . seems to stay the same, but you know it changes, but . . . it doesn't, but . . .. (Think about it, and your head (or whatever contains your central nervous system) will explode. This is quite an endevour to clean, so please refrain from such an action)

Fuzzy llamas are better
Current Staff:
Nerick- Barkeep and Manager
???- Barboy (Apply within)
Gabriella - Barmaid
Julie - Waiter
Jessica - Cook
Psudonym - Bard
(If the person with the job, such as the barboy, if that person does not come around for a month (Or so), they lose the job. Not to be mean, but to clear up the space, so that someone else who might want it can have it.)
NOW HIRING: A Waiter / Waitresses, Barboy.
If you're none of these but think you can help, ask about a job, ask Nerick, IC.
((Also if you have a Banner idea, please, PM it to... dunno, Quinsar or Celtois.))
Ringringringring

NPC's:

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Name: Naim Elless.
Race: Human.
Gender: Genderless.
Description: Completely average height, weight, and so on.
He's the bartender when Nerick isn't around.

But can you have your cake?
THE MENU:

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Be sure to keep an eye out for our DAILY SPECIALS!
Wines*:
Chimera Cabernet - A hearty red with hits of oak and black cherry.
Elven Wine – imported straight from Elven lands unless the cart turned
Merfolk Merlot - Full-bodied with a hint of rose.

Bar Drinks*:
Swampwater - A delicious lemon-lime delight but a tad . . . swampy
Shocker Lizard’s Chider – Sends a shock through your body, bound to wake you up electro-zaps!
Mai Tai - Dark and pineapple juice. PINEAPPLE!!
Sneak on the Beach - Vodka, Cranberry juice, pineapple juice and Peach Schapps. *sneak sneak sneak*
Rust Monster - Scotch and Drambuie drink and your sword explodes.
Coffee - buzzzzz. Fiji
Ice Liqueur - Guaranteed to cool you down. . . .
Dragon's Liver Buster - The strongest drink in the house. Don't say we didn't warn you... (Doesn't actually make your liver explode) [unless you're a dragon...]
Ichor Liquor - Made from a fermented mix of various kinds of blood, the perfect drink for vampires and similar creatures, like Kurvis. >:p
Haley's Liquer - named for the redheaded rogue, a sweet creme liqueur, excellent over ice. And while you're asleep, she'll loot your body
Wizard Blizzard - The effect depends on the spell stored in it. Other than that, it's made with crushed ice and Bourbon. Or a meteor swarm
Manticore Martini – a regular Martini but stirred with a spike from a Manticore tail, giving it an exotic taste. And it's poisonous!
Melon Juice – relaxes the mind - Now available without alcohol!
Green Tea - with a hint of sugar Coffee? Tea? Monster?
Beholder's Earl Grey - It's a tea named after everyone's favorite abberation. Need I say more? Yes, actually. What's in it?
Root Beer – For those who have a weak stomach
Cold Milk – For the kids
Burning Brandy- To keep the Archbishop happy Who is never around . . .
Apple Cider - Non-alcoholic, fruity goodness! Ah, cheesy goodness.

Beers, Ales & Such*: Beer beer beer jiddily beer beer beer!
Thunder Ale - puts a boom in your tummy Then your tummy explodes!
Grim Brewery brand Ginger Ale - deathly good Hmm . . . lawsuit, anyone? If it does kill, than it's murder, but if it doesn't, than it's false advertising.
Dwarven Brandy - comes from dwarven lands
Pirate's Drink (Rum) - Be drunk while saying "Yarrr!" Garr! Arr! Marr! Blarg!
Guilders Ale - a tasty treat that doesn't mess with your mind Or does it?
Rouges Rum - Warning: You may pickpocket while drunk No 'may' about it.
Fairy Ale - You'll think you can fly Really should upgrade this to Red Bull, as that does give you wings.

Fizzy Drinks: (courtesy of Leigh and Mee. Thanks!) They say we're welcome.
Blueberry buzz - Spyte soda, with blueberries, and blueberry syrup in it.
Banana beer - Root beer, banana slices, whipped cream on the top, and a cherry on that. Goes well with Muffins.
Leigh special - A warm coffee (Bubbly, of course...with your choice of a hazelnut or chocolate flavor), with a swirl of peppermint, a stick of cocoa, and optional sprinkles and whipped cream. BUY ME!
Triple threat - Root beer and coffee swirled together, with a lemon wedge jammed on the rim. It accepts its fate.
K's special - Carbonated water, mixed with cream, pineapple flavoring, coconut sprinkled on top, then a few strawberries dropped into it. Very good. No one is going to buy it.
Ice cream float - Your choice of flavors.
The cute drink - Just like K's special, but it has some fruit on the top. A lime slice as a smile, and two cherries as eyes. It's cute. It also comes with a little umbrella. It really is.
Spryte - the regular, boring drink.

Food:
Peanuts Oh yes there is.
Chips & Dip and salsa! No, I slay you!
Curry - Chicken, beef, pork, or seafood OmNomNom indeed.
Cured Ham Steak So it isn't hurt, right? As it got a cure spell?
BBQ Hydra Heads Delicious
Salads (Spring Greens, Caesar, and Italian Pasta) Springs? Like, metal springs? Ew.
Pork Chops Enter the pork.
Mutton Chops No. Just no.
Golden Apple May cause wars.
Fish (Cod, Eel, Trout, Salmon) – Served with a lemon wedge or lime.
Fresh Bread That's reserved for the prisoners!
Fine Aged Cheddar So much better.
Fava Beans Go great with liver.
Birdseed for all those avians out there.
Berries - all kinds, blue, black, straw purple, mauve, hamster.
Roasted Quail - kinda like a small turkey but not. See?
And anything else you may want. Just ask.

Dessert:
Muffins Moofins?
Brownies The place is lousy with them.
Slice of cake (Chocolate, cheese, whatever...) It's not a lie.
Milkshake So order one already.
Cookies For Dallas
Pie (Pick a flavor) Apple.

*Can substitute the alcohol for a magical liquid that can make anybody drunk, no matter what the resistance, for a little extra.

We hope you enjoy your stay at the Dancing Fox Inn!

Some Excellent Poems
Dancing Fox Inn and DFI '09
The Ballad of the Inn
We Dream of a Town

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[Viera Champion]

Eldena shoots the the cork off of a bottle of champagne to celebrate the new thread and the new year. She doesn't drink it though. Alcohol isn't good when you are pregnant.

[Recaiden]

Cleo tries to take the bottle of champagne for herself, since Eldena clearly shouldn't and isn't going to drink it.
Happy New Year, says the musician.

[Beans]

Seiner, whom I am using barely at all these days, appears because I feel like it.
Happy New Year, everyone!
Hopefully Beans won't forget about me as much!
((Be careful what you wish for, sweetie.
Nyahaha.))

[Viera Champion]

Now I feel even worse for Beans characters.

Eldena hands Cleo the champagne.
Happy New Year!

[Recaiden]

Happy new year to you too, time traveling girl, says Cleo, pouring herself a glass of the champagne, then offering the bottle to Seiner.

[Beans]

Seiner pours herself a glass.
Ooh, thanks!
Yay, sham-pain!

[Recaiden]

((Is she even old enough to drink? Either legally or safely?))
Sure thing. And clearly, I never even caught your name. I'm Cleosepha. Sip at the glass.

[Beans]

I'unno.
Depends. I mean, the Nexus doesn't have a standard drinking age, does it?

[Recaiden]

I don't know. It'd probably be rather low if it did. But 6 months is still pushing it.
Also, how does alcohol affect cats. Cleo considers testing for any differences. But she'd probably spill the glass.

[Beans]

Well, she's 6 months temporally and about 19 physically.
Sip.

[Recaiden]

19. Older than I thought.
Sip. She'll just ask the other ones what Seiner's name is.

[Beans]

Wait, was she asking Seiner's name?
Sorry, brain dead over here.
She answers promptly.
My name's Seiner, nice to meet you.

[Recaiden]

That's neat. Nice to meet you too.

So what brings you here?

[Beans]

Well, I was sort of born here.

[Recaiden]

Really? I think you're only the second native I've met. Nevermind.

[Beans]

Who's the first?

[Recaiden]

Wait, 3rd. I actually know of 2 dragons who were born here. Cleo shrugs.
But a lot of us seem to come from elsewhere.

[Beans]

She nods.
I know.
My mother's not from here either. She's from Hell, because she's an archdevil.
She says this brightly and casually.

[Recaiden]

Cleo nods and accepts this. It's not even unusual.
Are you just a normal devil then? You seem too nice.

[Beans]

No, I'm... I dunno what I am.
Apparently I was pulled into existence because my little sister was feeling sad and alone and she needed somebody. So poof, I'm here and she has a big sister. She smiles.
And anyway, my mother doesn't really do evil things. She mostly signs forms for the punishment of the wicked and that sort of thing.

[Recaiden]

Ah. That's good for her then.
I see. Why does she need to be an archdevil to do that? Aren't most of them more concerned with taking over the world and so on?

[Beans]

I dunno, really. I don't pay much attention to diabolic stuff.

[Recaiden]

You're not going to go into the family business or anything, then? Another shrug.

[Beans]

No, I think not.
I think I might become a teacher or something.

[Recaiden]

Ooh. That's a great line of work, teaching.
And deadtime.

[Chas the mage]

Chas walks in. he looks like he had a wild party last night.

Richard is here, drinking gin.

The colonel, lieutenant and the corporal (Richards ex-soldiers) are here. they seem unaware of Richards existence.

about half a dozen of Richard's active troops walk in, as well. they to are unaware of Richard. the troops look like they have modified armor, including a face mask.

[Recaiden]

Joneleth is here from somewhere.
Hey Richard! How goes the war? Gotten many innocent people killed lately?

[Beans]

Seiner is here, but she backs toward the ladies' room to avoid this scary conflict.

[Recaiden]

Sure, go hide in deadtime. I can wait.
Joneleth gets a glass of cider and sits down to drink it.