Let's Rank all the Months!

[Gaius Hermicus]

Hi GitP,

I have seemingly developed an obsession with ranking the months. Here's my list, but I'd like to hear other people's opinions too, since I am (shockingly) not omniscient.

1. June: June is the best month. The weather is perfect, just like summer, but not too hot, and my birthday also happens to be during this month.

2. May: May is pretty damn nice for the same reasons as June: good weather and just a general sense of relaxation. It loses points slightly for having final exams, though.

3. October: I love Halloween. Absolutely love it. Plus, fall is amazing in New England.

4. December: Christmas is quite nice, but the weather is pretty crap compared to October. It's winter without snow.

5. July: Ah, summer!

6. September: October, but warmer. It ranks lower because it doesn't have Halloween.

7. August: Ah, summer! Except sweltering and humid, and I swear the mosquitoes are out to kill me.

8. April: The end of April is great. The first taste of summer is in the air, and you finally start to break out of that mud season slump. The beginning sucks. It sucks hard.

9. February: Snow. Mountains of snow. I hate the cold, and I hate snow.

10. January: Basically the same as February, except with the added hell of exams.

11. November: I'm sorry, I just don't like Thanksgiving very much. The weather is awful, and Halloween season is over. The too-early Christmas advertising makes it even worse.

12. March: March is the worst. No matter what happens, March is always characterized by chronic moisture. Either it's warmish and the snow melts, leaving mud absolutely everywhere, or it snows heavy. There's usually freezing wind too, and nothing interesting ever happens in March. It is the worst month, no contest.

Share your opinions!

[Caerulea]

Salve Gai Hermice,

Spoiler: Rankings

Show

1. January. I like winter, also, my birthday is here. Unfortunately the temperature of winter has slowly been increasing.
2. June. School is basically over, and the weather is nice. Also, nothing I really have to do.
3. December. Christmas is always good; it's an excuse to spend time with the family and take a break.
4. July / August, basically like June, but occasionally too hot.
5. November. Thanksgiving, plus crisp autem air is the best.
6. October, like November except without Thanksgiving.
7. May.
8. Febuary. Winter, but with no breaks.
9. April. Start of Spring.
10. March. Like Febuary but with slightly warmer weather.
11. September. Start of school (uggh).

The whole year is actually pretty nice.


—Caerulea

[Peelee]

Best month: September. Weather is perfect, especially at the end.

All others are the worst. Honorable mention for April-August for the warmth.

[understatement]

August is unbearable in the heat.

November has nice weather.

[NontheistCleric]

I live in the tropics, so weather is roughly the same the entire year round.

December is nice because the monsoon season comes around then and makes things cooler. I also remember it fondly as the time of the end-of-year school holidays.

The other months are more or less equal to me.

[Tvtyrant]

August is my favorite month. I like the heat and length of day, having enough daylight to go on two walks a day or a 15 mile hike and not have the sunset on me is great. I also tend to be more active in sunny times in general, I always lose 10-30 pounds over the summer.

[Kyrell1978]

For me it's September, October, November, May, April, June, March, July, August, December, January, February. I don't like extreme weather either way, but really hate the cold.

[veti]

January is the best. Blazing hot, with several holidays, and the city is two parts empty.

When I lived in the northern hemisphere my favourite was September. As a kid, the start of school felt like a new beginning, a time of possibilities. As an adult, it still felt optimistic. Still sunny and pleasant, but no longer hot enough to be uncomfortable.

[Khedrac]

The UK perspective: Obligatory Link

Spoiler: Lyrics for those interested

Show

https://lyricstranslate.com/en/donald-swann-song-weather-lyrics.html

[Both] January brings the snow,
Makes your feet and fingers glow.

February's ice and sleet,
Freeze the toes right off your feet.

Welcome, March, with wint'ry wind,
Would thou wert not so unkind.

April brings the sweet spring showers,
On and on for hours and hours.

Farmers fear unkindly May ,
Frost by night and hail by day.

June just rains and never stops,
Thirty days and spoils the crops.

In July the sun is hot,
[Flanders] Is it shining?
[Swann] No it's not!

[Both] August, cold and dank and wet,
Brings more rain than any yet.

Bleak September's mist and mud
Is enough to chill the blood.

Then October adds a gale,
Wind and slush and rain and hail.

Dark November brings the fog,
Should not do it to a dog.

Freezing wet December, then...
Both: b***** January again!
(January brings the snow),
(Makes your feet and fingers glow!)

[Heliomance]

January is hands down the worst. Christmas is over, the word is cold and bleak, and there's still most of winter left, it's months to go before you have any chance of seeing the sun again. It's also at least twice as long as any other month.

[Magic_Hat]

I think we're all forgetting a month:

[Vizzerdrix]

Hi GitP,

I have seemingly developed an obsession with ranking the months. Here's my list, but I'd like to hear other people's opinions too, since I am (shockingly) not omniscient.

1. June: June is the best month. The weather is perfect, just like summer, but not too hot, and my birthday also happens to be during this month.

2. May: May is pretty damn nice for the same reasons as June: good weather and just a general sense of relaxation. It loses points slightly for having final exams, though.

3. October: I love Halloween. Absolutely love it. Plus, fall is amazing in New England.

4. December: Christmas is quite nice, but the weather is pretty crap compared to October. It's winter without snow.

5. July: Ah, summer!

6. September: October, but warmer. It ranks lower because it doesn't have Halloween.

7. August: Ah, summer! Except sweltering and humid, and I swear the mosquitoes are out to kill me.

8. April: The end of April is great. The first taste of summer is in the air, and you finally start to break out of that mud season slump. The beginning sucks. It sucks hard.

9. February: Snow. Mountains of snow. I hate the cold, and I hate snow.

10. January: Basically the same as February, except with the added hell of exams.

11. November: I'm sorry, I just don't like Thanksgiving very much. The weather is awful, and Halloween season is over. The too-early Christmas advertising makes it even worse.

12. March: March is the worst. No matter what happens, March is always characterized by chronic moisture. Either it's warmish and the snow melts, leaving mud absolutely everywhere, or it snows heavy. There's usually freezing wind too, and nothing interesting ever happens in March. It is the worst month, no contest.

Share your opinions!

This couldn't't be any more wrong. October is most best. Halloween is best holiday.

November is SECOND best. Mainly because my birthday is then. And thanksgiving.

December is last because Christmas sucks.

Everything else doesn't matter.

[CheesePirate]

I like December the most. It's the darkest month but there are lights everywhere, both outside and inside. More than a month of Yule¹ celebrations, lasting until mid January.

¹ not Christmas

[Scarlet Knight]

I like December the most. It's the darkest month but there are lights everywhere, both outside and inside. More than a month of Yule¹ celebrations, lasting until mid January.

¹ not Christmas

1. December: Christmas and New Years eve in the same month; school vacation, and the snow then is magical.

2. July: Ah, glorious summer! 4th of July ! Babes , beaches , bikinis!

3. June, like July but with no holiday & colder water.

4. August - still summer! Great baseball weather. Except toward the end depression sets in as school approaches

5. May flowers! Life returns!

6. April: showers cause this month to drops a spot, but top half because of Easter.

7.October has Halloween and folliage. Net negative as the world begins to die and politicians go full bore.

8. March is when the snow melts, & is kite season. But Lent...

9. September: the world cools and we go back to school. So sad. Hurricanes...

10. November: yes Thanksgiving but too-early Christmas advertising and cold makes it bad.

11. February: cold dreary but short.

12. January :Basically the same as February, except longer.

[2D8HP]

"April is the cruellest month, breeding
Lilacs out of the dead land, mixing
Memory and desire, stirring
Dull roots with spring rain.
Winter kept us warm, covering
Earth in forgetful snow, feeding
A little life with dried tubers.
Summer surprised us, coming over the Starnbergersee
With a shower of rain; we stopped in the colonnade,
And went on in sunlight, into the Hofgarten,
And drank coffee, and talked for an hour.
Bin gar keine Russin, stamm’ aus Litauen, echt deutsch.
And when we were children, staying at the archduke’s,
My cousin’s, he took me out on a sled,
And I was frightened. He said, Marie,
Marie, hold on tight. And down we went.
In the mountains, there you feel free.
I read, much of the night, and go south in the winter.

What are the roots that clutch, what branches grow
Out of this stony rubbish? Son of man,
You cannot say, or guess, for you know only
A heap of broken images, where the sun beats,
And the dead tree gives no shelter, the cricket no relief,
And the dry stone no sound of water. Only
There is shadow under this red rock,
(Come in under the shadow of this red rock),
And I will show you something different from either
Your shadow at morning striding behind you
Or your shadow at evening rising to meet you;
I will show you fear in a handful of dust.

Frisch weht der Wind
Der Heimat zu,
Mein Irisch Kind,
Wo weilest du?

“You gave me hyacinths first a year ago;
They called me the hyacinth girl.”
—Yet when we came back, late, from the Hyacinth garden,
Your arms full, and your hair wet, I could not
Speak, and my eyes failed, I was neither
Living nor dead, and I knew nothing,
Looking into the heart of light, the silence.
Öd’ und leer das Meer.

Madame Sosostris, famous clairvoyante,
Had a bad cold, nevertheless
Is known to be the wisest woman in Europe,
With a wicked pack of cards. Here, said she,
Is your card, the drowned Phoenician Sailor,
(Those are pearls that were his eyes. Look!)
Here is Belladonna, the Lady of the Rocks, The lady of situations.
Here is the man with three staves, and here the Wheel,
And here is the one-eyed merchant, and this card,
Which is blank, is something he carries on his back,
Which I am forbidden to see. I do not find The Hanged Man. Fear death by water.
I see crowds of people, walking round in a ring.
Thank you. If you see dear Mrs. Equitone, Tell her I bring the horoscope myself:
One must be so careful these days.

Unreal City,
Under the brown fog of a winter dawn,
A crowd flowed over London Bridge, so many,
I had not thought death had undone so many.
Sighs, short and infrequent, were exhaled, And each man fixed his eyes before his feet.
Flowed up the hill and down King William Street,
To where Saint Mary Woolnoth kept the hours
With a dead sound on the final stroke of nine.
There I saw one I knew, and stopped him, crying “Stetson!
You who were with me in the ships at Mylae!
That corpse you planted last year in your garden,
Has it begun to sprout? Will it bloom this year?
Or has the sudden frost disturbed its bed? Oh keep the Dog far hence, that’s friend to men,
Or with his nails he’ll dig it up again!
You! hypocrite lecteur!—mon semblable,—mon frère!”"

-THE BURIAL OF THE DEAD

[Dragonquetra]

I live in Phoenix (Arizona) where the summers are brutal so keep that in mind.

01. October. Summer officially over. Halloween Season.
02. December. Christmas, I love joy of the season.
03. November. My birthday month.
04. March. GMs Day. Cold temperature starts to break, decent weather for going out.
05. May. Free Comic Book Day.
06. April. Weather can vary, either being cold or decent for outings.
07. September. Hot weather can start to break in the latter half of the month, a good time for outings.
08. June. Warm, but not too much to make going out too uncomfortable for the first half of the month. Good month for swimming at night.
09. July. Too hot during the day, but another good month for swimming outside at night.
10. January. Gets cold, time to break out a second comforter.
11. February. Cold af. Not a fan of Valentine's Day.
12. August. Furnace outside.

[Peelee]

I liveg in Phoenix (Arizona) where the summers are brutal so keep that in mind.

Spoiler: You had to expect this, really.

Show

[Dragonquetra]

Spoiler: You had to expect this, really.

Show

Yep. If I had the means, I'd move to somewhere in Washington, away from the coast and not next to a river.

[Manga Shoggoth]

The UK perspective:

Truly, there is not enough Flanders and Swann in the world.

[The Extinguisher]

Here's a definitive list and no I dont take constructive criticism

1. October aka Halloween month. this is an obvious choice i will elaborate no further
2. June. the sun hasnt begun its hate campaign against the world, but also, you can go outside without seven layers of clothing. a perfect middle month
3. November. Sure its cold, sure its miserable, but thats what hot cocoa is for! curl up in a ball of blankets and cats and try not to think about the upcoming holiday assault
4. April. Its got the funny number in it. Nuff said.
5. October again. So good its on the list twice, cause its also got stuff that isn't halloween. look at those trees how can you not love those trees
6. May. its like june, but wetter
7. January. the best time of year to sell off old gym equipment you bought last year and never used
8. September. gets points for being so close to october, with the trees and the crisp fall air, but also casts a miasma of stress over every single school that ruins everyones day
9. July. do you like heat? do you like a whole lot of heat? we got a whole lot of heat and not much else?
10. March. I dont have much against march, but theres not really a lot going on? sorry march
11. August. July 2: you thought we were done with the heat?
12. December. I.........................

If you disagree with this list, write your answers on a postcard and throw them into the sea. if Poseidon wills it, they will find me

[Caerulea]

Do you take destructive criticism? Here, have a confetti bomb and also the statement "your list is completely wrong". I also tried the postcard method. Did it work?

—Caerulea

[Vizzerdrix]

Here's a definitive list and no I dont take constructive criticism

Hmm... you have November out of place, but you get points for doubling down on Octobers.

[Peelee]

School was fun as a kid, is going to be even better as a parent, and Halloween is alright, I guess. Y'all are weird.

[Durkoala]

The UK perspective: Obligatory Link

Spoiler: Lyrics for those interested

Show

https://lyricstranslate.com/en/donald-swann-song-weather-lyrics.html

[Both] January brings the snow,
Makes your feet and fingers glow.

February's ice and sleet,
Freeze the toes right off your feet.

Welcome, March, with wint'ry wind,
Would thou wert not so unkind.

April brings the sweet spring showers,
On and on for hours and hours.

Farmers fear unkindly May ,
Frost by night and hail by day.

June just rains and never stops,
Thirty days and spoils the crops.

In July the sun is hot,
[Flanders] Is it shining?
[Swann] No it's not!

[Both] August, cold and dank and wet,
Brings more rain than any yet.

Bleak September's mist and mud
Is enough to chill the blood.

Then October adds a gale,
Wind and slush and rain and hail.

Dark November brings the fog,
Should not do it to a dog.

Freezing wet December, then...
Both: b***** January again!
(January brings the snow),
(Makes your feet and fingers glow!)

I was going to post this!

[Aedilred]

January is grim as. It's dark, nobody has any money, there's nothing much to look forward to, half the people you know are deliberately killing fun with Veganuary, Dry January, or new year's resolutions they haven't yet given up on, so the social scene is dead. And tax returns are due at the end of the month if you have to do them? Just terrible.

February is a marginal improvement in every respect except the weather, which is often worse.

December ranks higher than January purely because it's party season.

March is a nothing month which is characterised for me only by a surfeit of family birthdays and other gift-giving occasions which are always a pain. Not that I don't like giving people things but choosing presents is a minefield and it also incorporates Mothering Sunday and not too infrequently Easter as well. Plus the clocks go forward so you lose an hour in bed? Lame. There's also a quarter day so quarterly bills become payable, but on the bright side at least there's no council tax.

When I was at school September was my least favourite month because it was wet and you had to go back to school after the summer. Thanks to climate change, it's now generally fairly hot, and school is no longer a consideration so it's gone up in my estimation.

August by contrast has plummeted in my estimation since it's too hot and all the kids are on holiday so everywhere is more crowded. It does include my birthday though.

June is generally too hot for me these days.

July oddly seems to be cooler and wetter than either August or June, most years, but

A few years ago I would have said October was one of my favourite months but climate change has once again played a part and the British autumn (one of my favourite seasons) has been eroded.

November is like October except darker but there is Bonfire Night.

I have no particularly strong feelings about May or April but they are often quite wet and many of the redeeming features of springtime have once again been spoiled by climate change, so they are often too hot for me too.

If I had to rank them, I guess I'd go something like (descending order):

1. September
2. November
3. December
4. October
5. May
6. April
7. August
8. July
9. February
10. March
11. June
12. January

but I would rather not.

[Cockroach King]

I don't want to sound mean but anyone who doesn't put February as last is wrong. Make up your mind already month: is it 28 days or 29? Also all other months are 30 or 31 days. Stop being so different!

[Peelee]

I don't want to sound mean but anyone who doesn't put February as last is wrong. Make up your mind already month: is it 28 days or 29? Also all other months are 30 or 31 days. Stop being so different!

Excuse me, February gets bo us points for leap year. You can have a birthday that doesn't exist but every for years, how awesome is that?

Frankly, I'm of the opinion we should have 13 months of 28 days each, then a monthless New Years Day (a bank holiday) and, every four years, a second monthless day immediately following New Years Day, Leap Day (also a bank holiday). Each month is exactly four weeks, every date will fall on the same day each year but will still rotate as years change, any planning or scheduling working off a weekly or bi-weekly basis would be simplified. Once we figure out the date conversions and whatnot, we'd be all set.

[Cockroach King]

Excuse me, February gets bo us points for leap year. You can have a birthday that doesn't exist but every for years, how awesome is that?

Were you born on the 29 of February? If not do you only celebrate your birthday and get birthday gifts once every 4 years?

[Peelee]

Were you born on the 29 of February? If not do you only celebrate your birthday and get birthday gifts once every 4 years?

I was not, no. I used to be know triplets, whose mom was born on 2/29, though. That was a rare lady. Don't know the details of her birthday parties, though.

[Xuc Xac]

I live in the tropics, so weather is roughly the same the entire year round.

2. July: Ah, glorious summer! 4th of July ! Babes , beaches , bikinis!

I live literally a stone's throw from Waikīkī, so my life is pretty much non-stop sun, sand, surf, and bikinis as far as the eye can see. If it wasn't for holidays, I wouldn't have much sense of time passing. I often don't even think about what day of the week it is.