AMEN V: Rise of the Maggots

[Lord Magtok]

((My appologies.))

*Moon Called looks around with a grin. She hands Saurous a pair of sunglasses.* Oh, quit whinning, you little emo. *A strange, talking rabbit walks up to her, munching on a carrot.*

Eh, what's up, doc?

Hehehe...emo. *Laughs a little before continuing to squirm on the ground in agony.*


Lesse here. We have an insane Belkar-esque dude. A robotic warlock? A straitjacketed pogogoer... and...umm. some other guys. I need a niche.

No! I'm no wimpy little warlock loser. I'm a cyborg!

Non-magical, and proud of it, man!

...now excuse me while I lie here in unspeakably awful pain.

[Rex Idiotarum]

* Rex Flies accross the room and Pogos off the wall *
Mayonnaise sent you, didn't he?

[Mr. Moon]

*A short, chuby, bald hunter comes running out of the forest, chassing a duck*

I'm tellin' ya, it'sthp rabbit stheasthon!

Why you wasicly foul, get back here!

Look! Look! There'sth a rabbit over there!

Neeh, sorry doc. It's duck season.

No it'sth not! It'sth rabbit stheaon!

*Meanwhile, the hunter is aiming at both, constantly switching between target as they arguee over which season it is.*

Duck season!

Rabbit stheasthon!

Rabbit season!

Duck stheasthon! Fire!

*BLAM!* *The duck gets shot by the hunter, resulting in severly blackend feathers and beak.*

You're disthpicable. I hate you.

[Meynolds]

Chuck flies across the time-space continuum and delivers a solid kick... to the head of MC.

[Cyrano]

Hehehe...emo. *Laughs a little before continuing to squirm on the ground in agony.*



No! I'm no wimpy little warlock loser. I'm a cyborg!

Non-magical, and proud of it, man!

...now excuse me while I lie here in unspeakably awful pain.

Explain the robe. And the claws.
*glances around*

*walks up and kicks Magtok in his unmentionables again.*

I may be no Chuck Norris, but time is on my side!

*does it again*

GOD THIS IS FUN!

*continues.*

[Saurous]

*A short, chuby, bald hunter comes running out of the forest, chassing a duck*

I'm tellin' ya, it'sthp rabbit stheasthon!

Why you wasicly foul, get back here!

Look! Look! There'sth a rabbit over there!

Neeh, sorry doc. It's duck season.

No it'sth not! It'sth rabbit stheaon!

*Meanwhile, the hunter is aiming at both, constantly switching between target as they arguee over which season it is.*

Duck season!

Rabbit stheasthon!

Rabbit season!

Duck stheasthon! Fire!

*BLAM!* *The duck gets shot by the hunter, resulting in severly blackend feathers and beak.*

You're disthpicable. I hate you.

...can we please move on? I'd like to watch cartoon characters fight it out all night, but I have better things to do.



Chuck flies across the time-space continuum and delivers a solid kick... to the head of MC.

*Saurous somehow catches Chuck in a massive hand of force*

Where do you think you're going?

[Mr. Moon]

*a portal opens up and a foot lunges out of the portal to hit Moon Called, who is watching the creatures with a fair amount of amusment.*

Ow. That hurt.

Aw... but the little bunny is cute! And sarcastic.

*she blinks as the foot nearly kicks her head. A nano second later, instincts kick in, and she is knealing, with her sword between her and the foot. Then she realises it's just a foot in the air, and stands, looking rather embaresed.*

[Lord Magtok]

Explain the robe. And the claws.
*glances around*

*walks up and kicks Magtok in his unmentionables again.*

I may be no Chuck Norris, but time is on my side!

*does it again*

GOD THIS IS FUN!

*continues.*

Augh! You jerk! You'll pay for this later!

The claws are robotic, and the robe...I just thought it looked cool! Whats so wrong about that?!?

Ow! *Utters a string of profanities, just enough to make a sailor blush. (Not that there are any sailors at AMEN)*

[Meynolds]

Chuck transcends dimensions again, hitting Magtok in the unmentionables... again.

[Lord Magtok]

YOU AGAIN?!?

*An even greater string of profantities follow.*

[Saurous]

Aw... but the little bunny is cute! And sarcastic.

*she blinks as the foot nearly kicks her head. A nano second later, instincts kick in, and she is knealing, with her sword between her and the foot. Then she realises it's just a foot in the air, and stands, looking rather embaresed.*

'K...Chuck Norris aside, we could stand here for a while, but who knows what horrible creatures may come up to us. Besides, I want to keep moving before a Golden Saint shows u-

*A woman dressed in golden armor walks up to them, sword drawn. She has beast-like yellow eyes, and a winged helmet. She gives off a disturbingly bright glow of yellow*

Who are you two, and why do you think you are worthy enough to stand in the world of Sheogorath?

*Saurous's sunglasses shatter as the Saint walks up*

Dear gods, the light burns!

*He hides behind MC, covering his eyes*

[Cyrano]

Augh! You jerk! You'll pay for this later!

The claws are robotic, and the robe...I just thought it looked cool! Whats so wrong about that?!?

Ow! *Utters a string of profanities, just enough to make a sailor blush. (Not that there are any sailors at AMEN)*

THATS IT! THATS MY NICHE!

*delivers a farewell kick*

Avast, me hearties! It be D'anna, Androgenous captain of this 'ere vessle! The "Unfortunate Landlubber!" So called because this 'ere AMEN has no water! Arrrgh!
*cliimbs into boat, sets up Calamari Cannons*

[Meynolds]

Chuck strikes D'anna Biers with a roundhouse kick to the head.

[Mr. Moon]

'K...Chuck Norris aside, we could stand here for a while, but who knows what horrible creatures may come up to us. Besides, I want to keep moving before a Golden Saint shows u-

*A woman dressed in golden armor walks up to them, sword drawn. She has beast-like yellow eyes, and a winged helmet. She gives off a disturbingly bright glow of yellow*

Who are you two, and why do you think you are worthy enough to stand in the world of Sheogorath?

*Saurous's sunglasses shatter as the Saint walks up*

Dear gods, the light burns!

*He hides behind MC, covering his eyes*

Uh, hi. *Moon Called says, trying to remain chearful and ruling her lover out in the way of options.* My freind and I are just visiting. We meen no harm. Really. *she hides her greatsword behind her back, the effect of which being ruined by the fact that it still sticks out from behind her back. She gives what she hopes is her most convincing smile.*

[Lord Magtok]

THATS IT! THATS MY NICHE!

*delivers a farewell kick*

Avast, me hearties! It be D'anna, Androgenous captain of this 'ere vessle! The "Unfortunate Landlubber!" So called because this 'ere AMEN has no water! Arrrgh!
*cliimbs into boat, sets up Calamari Cannons*

Gods no...I've helped create a monster...:smalleek:

[Saurous]

Ah, I see. Sheogorath is not exactly prejudice to those of evil or good. He only rules over Madness, and does not stick to an alignment. I suggest that you continue to Bliss. If you continue down this road, you'll reach the city.

*She smiles, and the aura grows brighter. Saurous whimpers*

((Magtok, let's just say that Saurous is going to be completely and utterly insane after this adventure, and I doubt he would enjoy coming home to see a pirate and all this madness))

[Lord Fullbladder, Master of Goblins]

"Well, dear... madam... sir... thing... Padawan, I have a robe too. I just choose to have varying outfits. Unlike Saurous, who never changes, or Magtok, who clones his wardrobe. I also have claws." Fullbladder shows off devilish goblinoid claws. "And yet I'm a Druid/Surgeon/Wizard/Mechanic. So.... Physical appearances may vary. As may voices."

Fullbladder proceeds to make a fashion statement, stealing as he often does from another dimension, continuity, and multiverse. This time it's a certain Emporer's wardrobe. Fullbladder finds it rather drafty.

[Mr. Moon]

((There there Maggot. You can take solice in the fact that when Moon Called gets back, and she sees this mess you've caused, you are freaking doomed. ^_^))


Ah, I see. Sheogorath is not exactly prejudice to those of evil or good. He only rules over Madness, and does not stick to an alignment. I suggest that you continue to Bliss. If you continue down this road, you'll reach the city.

*She smiles, and the aura grows brighter. Saurous whimpers*

Thank-you, my friend. He reminds me of someone I know, actualy. *She smiles, and hands Saurous a new, magicle pair of sunglasses.*

[Cyrano]

Gods no...I've helped create a monster...:smalleek:

First off, I DESERVED A KICK FROM CHUCK! YAY! IMA KEEP THE BRUISE FOR EVA!

Secondly, Magtok, why are we here if not to be monsters? To prey on the weaknesses and fears of the unenlightened? To be, in short, Cephalopod Pirates of the Seven Landmasses!

AVAST YE, HEARTIES! I be relocatin'!

*summons a few exatons of squid to pound the back of the boat, acting like jet propulsion*

SO LONG, SUCKAS!

*hits a wall.*

Hey, this was a new boat! dastards!

*summons calamari from below, flies outside of city bounds.*

Now, I create my rotting fortress!

Thousands of dead calamari rise, shifting, twisting! Dunes of the things! YES! For now the city of Calamari Rising is here! The quick and the dead alike arise to create my undead fortress of doom!

*raises miles of city, Calamari Cannons, Cephalopod Elites, Pogoctopi, and the dreaded Cuttlefish Wizards.*

And with this my power shall rival that of the gods themselves!

If the gods had rotting squid cities!

Which they DONT!@

[Lord Magtok]

((There there Maggot. You can take solice in the fact that when Moon Called gets back, and she sees this mess you've caused, you are freaking doomed. ^_^))

Wha-? :smalleek: This isn't really my fault..its that newbie's fault! The NEWBIE!!!

...And how did I just hear an OOC voice? :smallconfused:

[Saurous]

Thank-you, my friend. He reminds me of someone I know, actualy. *She smiles, and hands Saurous a new, magicle pair of sunglasses.*

Thank you, again. *Saurous switches the sunglasses quickly*

*The Saint smiles, and the aura calms. She heads off, chasing the cartoon characters away*

...are my eyes bleeding? *A pair of red streams come from behind the glasses*

[Cyrano]

Wha-? :smalleek: This isn't really my fault..its that newbie's fault! The NEWBIE!!!

...And how did I just hear an OOC voice? :smallconfused:

Avast ye! iT be my Psychic Cephalopod Amplifiers! Also, I've been in Calamari Rising since the beginning of time! You're screwed, and nuthin' you can do about it!

But hey, I'll let you take solice in Calamari Rising if you let me have access to your mechanical cloner devices.

[Rex Idiotarum]

Why Dead Squid?
* Rex Grins, revealing a sharp fang, which he cuts his finger upon. He moves his and swiftly, and you can see the blood form a circle of Symbols before falling to the ground, Fire consumes the whole Calamarivill. *

Meh, * he says, while dramatically walking through the flames like Sephiroth did * Power to rival gods, I guess a 0th Divine Rating may count.

[Lord Magtok]

Avast ye! iT be my Psychic Cephalopod Amplifiers! Also, I've been in Calamari Rising since the beginning of time! You're screwed, and nuthin' you can do about it!

But hey, I'll let you take solice in Calamari Rising if you let me have access to your mechanical cloner devices.

NEV-*Suddenly remembers the recent string of groin kicks.* :smalleek:

...Umm...go ahead. Just don't break anything...please...:smallfrown:

*Limps slowly towards Calamari Rising (A city?)*

[Cyrano]

Why Dead Squid?
* Rex Grins, revealing a sharp fang, which he cuts his finger upon. He moves his and swiftly, and you can see the blood form a circle of Symbols before falling to the ground, Fire consumes the whole Calamarivill. *

Meh, * he says, while dramatically walking through the flames like Sephiroth did * Power to rival gods, I guess a 0th Divine Rating may count.

Ahem. Perhaps you didnt notice A, the lack of EMBALMING FLUID, and B, the instantaneous nature of my city.
*re rises*
*fire prooofs*
Ummm.....
*element proofs*
*Chaotic proofs*
*Rex proofs.*
*spaceship proofs*

Ahoy there, Cyborg Warlocky boyo! Ayes, Calamari Rising be my stinking city o' Squid and Cuttlefish! Enjoy the sights, the sounds, the smell, and enough military security to give pause to the Grand Moff Tarkin himself! Also, hurryp up.

*jets thousands of dead squid behind magtok to speed him up. Closes gates behind him*

Welcome...TO HELL!!!! MUWHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH!

Im just kiddin ya, this is Calamari Rising. Welcome to my parlour...ship...thing. Ignore the laser squid, don't try and kick any babies, and come into the ship! It smells better there.

[Mr. Moon]

Thank you, again. *Saurous switches the sunglasses quickly*

*The Saint smiles, and the aura calms. She heads off, chasing the cartoon characters away*

...are my eyes bleeding? *A pair of red streams come from behind the glasses*

*Moon Called frowns at the streams of read trickling out from under the sunglasses.* I am going to lift the sunglasses. Prepare yourself. Don't close you eyes.

*Moon Called lifts the glasses, and whistles.* Yes, your eyes are most deffinitly bleeding. *pulls out a scroll of Cure Moderate Wounds and heals Saurous, then replaces the sunglasses.*

((I gotta go, I may or may not be on tomarow.))

[Saurous]

Thanks again. I really need to learn more than two healing spells.

((I guess this will continue tommorrow, or whenever it is you get back?))

[Lord Magtok]

Ahoy there, Cyborg Warlocky boyo! Ayes, Calamari Rising be my stinking city o' Squid and Cuttlefish! Enjoy the sights, the sounds, the smell, and enough military security to give pause to the Grand Moff Tarkin himself! Also, hurryp up.

*jets thousands of dead squid behind magtok to speed him up. Closes gates behind him*

Welcome...TO HELL!!!! MUWHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH!

Im just kiddin ya, this is Calamari Rising. Welcome to my parlour...ship...thing. Ignore the laser squid, don't try and kick any babies, and come into the ship! It smells better there.

Fine...I'll come to your ship...but... I'm not... a damn...warlock! :smallmad:

*Continues to limp, but at a slightly faster pace.*

*Moans loudly.* You weren't kidding...I have entered hell! :smallfrown:

[Rex Idiotarum]

* Does the symbols city calamarivil burns again *
Ah, the nature of Caster's blood, can overcome any magic not infused with some of the same power level.

[Lord Fullbladder, Master of Goblins]

A camerazard pair scurries under the door of Calimary Rising, using every precaution not to be detected. One, the smaller, folows Magtok. The other probes the darkest corners of the strange cephalopod-based citadel.

And all the while they are monitored. By a suspicious goblin, by government agents called upon by the suspicious goblin, and perhaps by the Gods themselves.

"Something is rotten in the state of Calimar. And I'd be willing to bet my balls that it is devilishly clever."

[Cyrano]

* Does the symbols city calamarivil burns again *
Ah, the nature of Caster's blood, can overcome any magic not infused with some of the same power level.

*looks around.*

Yo! Warlocky! Get back here!

*amid the cries of "NOt a WARLOCK!" D'anna bleeds Magtok of some of blood (no! he bleeds him of something OTHER than blood! What else would you BLEED?) and uses it to recast the spells.*

*What the hell. Taking a bit of blood dropped by RI in his spellcasting, D'anna recasts it's spells. It also extracts a tiny bit of soul to regrow anothe RI....in it's thrall! It won't work, but it's fun seeing tiny RI's scream in pain.*

Avast, me hearties! This ere nation needs a navy!

*With a cry of WOOOOOOSH, the land is blanketed in squid. Amongst which other squid swim. It's a sea of squid. And sailing it's waters, the oceanic Black Ark of Calamari Rising!*

Doomsday device? Yes please!

Oh, and warlocky, I be wanting yer little clony device. Yeees.... an ARMY of cyborg warlocks!

PS, "something is rotten in the state of Calamar"? Maybe, oh, THE ENTIRE CITY IS MADE OF DEAD SQUID!?!?!??!

[Lord Fullbladder, Master of Goblins]

((Yes, I found it quite ironic as well. Just what Fullbladder, my actual self, or almost any pseudo-incarnation I have ever created would say))

[Vespe Ratavo]

Vespe sneaks through the base. Everyone else is logged off or asleep, time to steal their stuff!

Vespe proceeds to steal Lord Magtoks stuff.

[Rex Idiotarum]

A-ha, I've caught the Night-Thief!

[Castaras]

* Pinafore floats in. It glares at anyone who is watching *

Don't ask.

* Floats into kitchen *

[Dartonus]

*Quickly pulls the door of the cabinet I am hiding in shut, having Put love potion in all the food*

[Castaras]

* Summons some fresh food and eats *

And now to give this food to everyone else...

Hang on, someone's put extra potion on these...hmm...

Thanks to whoever did this :smallamused:

[Dartonus]

*Voice, muffled from accidentally hiding in the Knive cabinet*
You're welcome!

[Castaras]

* Opens knife cupboard. *

Now if you would be so kind to get out of here, please?

(( Brb ))

[Dartonus]

*Fires squirt gun loaded with love potion in her face after casting Superior Invisibility on self, then runs like hell*

[Castaras]

* Casts blindness on self *

Right. Now to go do something else while I wait for it to wear out.

[Lord Magtok]

Gods...this would be a lot less traumatic if I knew what a pinafore was...

...Or if I could convince that damn fool I'm not a warlock!

*Limps away from the squid-city, back towards AMEN.*

Better there where MC can kill me...than near that mad man/woman/thing.

[Meynolds]

Chuck Norris appears again, kicking Magtok in the groin. Hard.

Oh, and a pinafore is a dress. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pinafore for details.

[Rex Idiotarum]

Hey, where's the Conditioner?

[Castaras]

* Ghostly hand hands over conditioner *

Here. At least I'm not the only pinafore here. Although there's a few teapots here...:smallamused:

[PirateMonk]

I'm just a Flumph. Please don't land on me. :smallfrown: Or Dartonus, but for a different reason.

[Saurous]

*The "Little Teapot" song begins playing over all the intercoms*

Heheheh...

[Rex Idiotarum]

Hahahahah, Magtok doesn't even need to change his avatar!

[Castaras]

Hmm, Saurous does though...Only a little though...:smallamused:

[Lord Magtok]

Hahahahah, Magtok doesn't even need to change his avatar!

:smallfurious: I'd kill you...if I wasn't in so much pain...

[Castaras]

:smallfurious: I'd kill you...if I wasn't in so much pain...

Poor little Maggie, in his little dress...

* Carefully floats out of range *

[Vespe Ratavo]

The teapot comes galumphing in. Ok, who turned the infinite improbability drive back on?

[Meynolds]

Chuck leaps at the teapot and shatters it with one solid kick.

[Saurous]

:smallfurious: I'd kill you...if I wasn't in so much pain...

Aww, is little Miss Maggie angry? :smallamused:

[Vespe Ratavo]

Chuck leaps at the teapot and shatters it with one solid kick.

((That, my friend, is called godmodding, and not looked kindly upon. But, I will play along this time.))

The teapot shatters. An army of them enters and attacks Meynolds.

[Castaras]

((That, my friend, is called godmodding, and not looked kindly upon. But, I will play along this time.))

(( Godmodding is allowed here, y'know. We ain't townies, we're godmodding freaks. ))

[Meynolds]

Meynolds looks surprised to be attacked by teapots, Chuck Norris looks surprised that he is not.

[Rex Idiotarum]

Mayonnaise what are you doing here?

[Castaras]

* Ghostly pinafore starts singing *

Maggie in her dress,
dances down the street
Sun shining in her eyes
Shoes tapping to the beat

And then along comes her love
The true and mighty knight
He grabs her hand and kisses her
Holding her so tight

They danced away,
The knight kissing her robotic hand
And he leads down to the pub
Where a romantic dance is played by the band.

Maggie in her sparkling dress
Was such a sight to see
Dancing upon the pub floor
She came within the top three

And then the knight took her hand
Kissing her with passion
He told her how he loved her
Especially her sense of fashion

[Vespe Ratavo]

(( Godmodding is allowed here, y'know. We ain't townies, we're godmodding freaks. ))

((Oh. Very well then. *devilish grin*))

Cthulu appears. 1d3 investigators per round. And one of them is Meynolds. No saving throw. He dies horribly in Cthulus crabby claws.

[Lord Magtok]

Aww, is little Miss Maggie angry? :smallamused:

*Draws a shiny black silenced pistol, and fires it across time and space at Saurou's neck.*


* Ghostly pinafore starts singing *

Gah! You will die too!

[Meynolds]

Meynolds, the player, looks rather surprised to be killed.
Meynolds, the half-dragon sorcerer, looks rather surprised to be killed.
Meynolds, the paladin, thinks "Not again."
Chuck kicks Cthulu in the groin.

[Castaras]

Can't kill the true Castaras though, she will carry on singing...:smallamused:

Maggie in her dress,
dances down the street...

[Fus.Weapon 1337]

*puts a regular VHS tape down on a table, and leaves*

[Lord Magtok]

Can't kill the true Castaras though, she will carry on singing...:smallamused:

Maggie in her dress,
dances down the street...

It seems there is only one way to end this. I must become reborn.

*Self-Destructs.*

*A new clone shows up.*

Alright, now it's time to make you all pay. :smallannoyed:

*Loads a rifle.*

[Castaras]

Haven't got the true Castaras yet...:smallamused:

* Pinafore picks up VHS tape *

[Vespe Ratavo]

Cthulu shoots lasers from the laser beam on top of his frickin head at Chuck Norris. ((Cookie for the reference))

[Lord Magtok]

*Fires an anti-pogo round at Rex, and then runs into the kitchen to smash up all the pastries.*


((Dr. Evil.))

[Castaras]

Nooooooooo! You're destroying my kitchen! :smalleek:

* Pinafore swoops into kitchen *

[PirateMonk]

"Hey, I have a crazy idea: Why don't we stop killing each other and make a musical out of our struggle with and victory over EVIL?"

[Meynolds]

The laser beam hits Chuck Norris. Turns out this one is a solid illusion, and it vanishes.

[Vespe Ratavo]

"Hey, I have a crazy idea: Why don't we stop killing each other and make a musical out of our struggle with and victory over EVIL?"

Cthulu dances at the idea. I get to be me!
Ok then, as soon as I turn back to an elf, lets start.

((Going to be off for a little bit))

[Lord Magtok]

Nooooooooo! You're destroying my kitchen! :smalleek:

* Pinafore swoops into kitchen *

*The cyborg dips a claw into a cake, and tosses the handful of pastry at the pinafore. It then smacks the oven with the rifle, fires at a few vials, and swallows a vial that was scanned and had only Magtok DNA.*

[Vespe Ratavo]

Vespe sets to work composing. I'm just a poor psychopath nobody loves me

HE'S JUST A POOR PSYCHO FROM A POOR FAMILY SPARE HIM HIS LIFE FROM MY MONSTROSITY!

Cthulu, you have a very nice singing voice.

Why thank you.

[Castaras]

*The cyborg dips a claw into a cake, and tosses the handful of pastry at the pinafore. It then smacks the oven with the rifle, fires at a few vials, and swallows a vial that was scanned and had only Magtok DNA.*

* Pinafore fades away. Clone pinafore comes in *

Wreck it if you must then. I can always rebuild...

* Sighs and floats away *

[Lord Fullbladder, Master of Goblins]

A teapot trying to wear a frock coat bounces grumpily into the room. It then whistles annoyingly. For some reason you think it's trying to tell you something. Perhaps Timothy has fallen into a well filled with toxic ooze again.

At this thought, a Troll runs past the teapot, in the other direction. It shouts "I save you, Timotty!"

The teapot sags in defeat. Then it has a brainstorm. It bounces closer to Meynolds, or whatever incarnation of Madness Meynolds has become. It whistles again, and lines up it's spout with Meynold's side or chest.

It then proceed to fire a series of crossbow bolts into Meynolds, tracing out a pattern reading something along the lines of this.


Why am I a teapot? Furthermore, how is it that I, a teapot, am able to bounce around, whistle controllably, and fire crossbow bolts from my spout? And, on a completely unrelated topic, how much gender confusion will this bring Meynolds? I think I've shot him over a hundred times. How can I even see? Would anyone care for some tea?

[Meynolds]

All the Meynolds' are dead now. There were only 3, the player, the paladin, and the half-dragon sorcerer.

Now the player is extra dead.

[PirateMonk]

Baleful Polymorph?

[Saurous]

*Meanwhile, in the Shivering Isles, Sheogorath appears, and does a jig on Saurous's skull. He then disappears*

Huh? I'm awake, I'm awake.

[Vespe Ratavo]

Vespe runs around and swings his glowing axe to and fro.

[Cyrano]

*amidst the ruins of a city made entirely of squid, D'anna sits, melancholy and smelling like the de'el himself.*

Nobody loves my dead squid city. Nobody loves me. I guess I'll just go eat worms.


OF DEMIGODLINESS!

Or I could just sit here, all alone, humming LotR Musical songs whilst waiting for death to come.

Hmmm.... Tough decision, eh. Oh well! Time to go steal someone's nachos.

*and with that, the ghostly form of D'anna The Landlubbing Pirate floats along on his floating raft of squid, towards the sinister thingymagig of AMEN. This is a bad sign for all of your nachos.*

[Castaras]

* Floats back to the kitchen ruins *

Was pretty thorough, I'll grant him that.

* Goes incorporeal and watches random things happen. *

[Saurous]

*Maur wanders through the chaos that is AMEN HQ*

Ooooooh...this isn't going to end well when someone with an actual sanity gets here...

[PirateMonk]

There isn't anyone like that, and if there was, they'd deserve what they got coming through here.

[Cyrano]

There isn't anyone like that, and if there was, they'd deserve what they got coming through here.

A....barrage of cyborg squid? Because I don't think ANYONE deserves that.

ANYONE.

[Saurous]

There isn't anyone like that, and if there was, they'd deserve what they got coming through here.

Oh, right, I forgot about that.

Speaking of insanity, where's Dad? I haven't seen him in two days now. Is he still in the Madness Realm or whatever?

[Dartonus]

Begin the MADNESS!!!
Ulitharid
Ulitharid
Ulitharid
Ulitharid
Elder Brain
Ulitharid
Ulitharid
Ulitharid
Ulitharid
ELDER BRAIN!!!!

[Cyrano]

Begin the MADNESS!!!
Ulitharid
Ulitharid
Ulitharid
Ulitharid
Elder Brain
Ulitharid
Ulitharid
Ulitharid
Ulitharid
ELDER BRAIN!!!!


I find your lack of insanity.....disturbing.
ALSO, I killed the elder brain. Thrice. WITH MY TEETH. MMmmm. Ingested intelligence 203.

[Dartonus]

Meh, I wasn't able to obtain a copy of LoM today. Maybe tomorrow.

[Saurous]

Good lord, when did this place change from AMEN (Association of the Malicious, Evil, and Nefarious) to AIMI (Association of the Insane, Mad, and Idiotic)? This is just silly. We are a group for those who are evil, not completely and utterly insane!


...and how can I see any of this? I'm not even sure where I am anymore.

[Vespe Ratavo]

Substitute the 7 radishes for the win all base numa numa yay! bhjsanhejnfujn4rtgoiua4n8gin4eougn48go5i8hgo58hg! Not to mention the parsely! Parfait and you only three easy payments of 99.999!

Vespe floats by with two sparrows for feet and a coconut for a head.

[Saurous]

Gods, I hate you all. :smallannoyed:

*Back in the Madness Realm, Saurous curls into a little ball and sits by the gate mumbling something about AMEN falling apart*

[Cyrano]

Gods, I hate you all. :smallannoyed:

*Back in the Madness Realm, Saurous curls into a little ball and sits by the gate mumbling something about AMEN falling apart*

All you have to do is wish, little man! Watch! I wish you were buried under a MOUNTAIN of cephalopod!

*Saurous becomes buried. Yay.*

I wish Cephalop was pronounced Sephalope.

I wish that I could sail the seven landmasses...on squid! Huzzah!

*D'anna flys into the sunset, proppelled by infinite squid.*

[Dartonus]

I'm better at being evil than I am at being insane.
*Still under the effect of Superior invisibilty, squirts Saurous with love potion*

[Lord Fullbladder, Master of Goblins]

Oh, right, I forgot about that.

Speaking of insanity, where's Dad? I haven't seen him in two days now. Is he still in the Madness Realm or whatever?

A suddenly wizened looking Fullbladder walks up to Maur.

"Son, your father is lost to this world, as I am lost to my own. Never shall the land be again cursed by his vile loving habits and odd personality quirks. The Way to Madness is crumbling.

"You see, my boy, there is a path--a tunnel, if you will, between this world and the Realm of Madness. Your father managed to find his way through, so to Madness did he travel. But others, many, many others, cannot leap the hurdles necessary. They clog up the plumbing, as it were. They simply go insane, whereas he who manages to get through leaves this plane for the Next.

"Well, to borrow from a famous chronicler, 'the path was made by the mad, and the mad keep it. They do not suffer the sane to pass.' But Saurous, dependable, sane old Saurous, he managed to get through. The Mad saw this, and realized their ways were flawed. To keep morel ike him out, they are breaking the Way. And without the Way between the Realms, what went in... stays in."

The goblin appears genuinely remorseful. Then he leaves young, montrous Maur, the son of Saurous.

[Saurous]

A suddenly wizened looking Fullbladder walks up to Maur.

<Rambling goes here>


The goblin appears genuinely remorseful. Then he leaves young, montrous Maur, the son of Saurous.

But...but...he didn't go alone...Mom went with him...

*Maur sits down, his eyes watering. He then stands back up*

Wait, you're just screwing with my head again, aren't you?

[Mr. Moon]

((I'm back. Where were we? Something about your eyes bleeding, Saurous?))

[Saurous]

((Yeah, and something about Bliss. Oh, and Fullbladder made Maur cry because he thought that the portal to Madness was collapsing))

[Mr. Moon]

((Oh, really? Maur! Knee him in the unmentionables!

Bliss is a city, right?))

[Saurous]

((Indeed.))

*Saurous begins walking down the pathway*

I guess we should get moving now....

"Aww, great, it's the colored role-playing voice again. That can't be good."

Saurous sighs.

[Lord Fullbladder, Master of Goblins]

"And that, my boy, is the one question we all all want to know the answer to," Fullbladder answers oddly to Maur question. "And some of won't like the alternative."

((I can change my unmentionables with the pulling of a trigger. If Maur tries anything...))

[Mr. Moon]

Oh dear." Moon Called mutters, adding a curse under her breath. "Oh well. I suppose the only way out of here is somewhere in Bliss?"

[Cyrano]

Dudes, like, Im totally a hippy now! A hippy cephalopod pirate! Lets like, go butt in on Sauarsroausrsa* plot!

*((spelling?))

And then we can, like, I dunno, have a father son meeting! With hemp! And like, calamari! Dudes, I've got some marinara! So, lets, like, be super crazy and reshore up the way to madness! Or something! Hey look, a penny!

[Saurous]

"Well, actually, it would be in New Sheoth, unofficially referred to as 'Split'." A map appears next to Saurous, and a pointer appears in his right hand. The map depicts a large island, with several notes on it, including "The Fringe", "The Hills of Suicides", "New Sheoth", "The Madgod's Boot", etc. Saurous brings the pointer up to the edge of the Fringe, an area in the north west.

"You see, we are here at the moment, and New Sheoth is...here." He shifts the pointer to a spot in the eastern part of the island. The names "New Sheoth", "Bliss", and "Crucible" are all placed atopt a city-like area.

"The city is on the direct border between Dementia and Mania, and so each side of it reflects it's respective realm. Bliss is the half in Mania, and is happy, colorful, and bright. Crucible is the darker half in Dementia, and is messy, dull, and unwelcoming. Sheogorath makes his home here." He points to the outer edge of the city, right on the split between Crucible and Bliss. "But, otherwise, yes. Our best place to go is New Sheoth."

[Mr. Moon]

"I... see..." Moon Called mutters, squinting at the map. "How far away are we? Two, three days?"

[Rex Idiotarum]

My Divination must be messed up, I just had Deja Vu.

[Saurous]

"I... see..." Moon Called mutters, squinting at the map. "How far away are we? Two, three days?"

"Well, if we move fast enough, we may make it in just one. It isn't exactly a big place." Saurous notes, with a smirk. The map and pointer both disappear.

((No, Rex, you're just completely insane))

[Cyrano]

AHEM!
Um, excuse me.

Ahem.
This is AMEN, yes? Malicious? Evil? Nefarious?
Than why are you all like "Ooh let's save our families and cook them a nice meal!" eh? Just leave them to die a horrible, maddening death. it'll happen eventually. And, is it just me, or do I speak in fetching colours?

[Mr. Moon]

((Sorry, computer problems.))

Moon Called smiles. "Good. For some reason, I'm worried about Maur. Possibly because he's been alone for about two days now."

[Saurous]

"As am I. He can handle himself well, but imagine what torturous madness must be going on." He says, with a shudder. "Well, let's get moving."

He begins moving down the pathway.

[Mr. Moon]

"I'm not sure I want to." Moon Called says, following Saurous. After a while, she fills the silance. "So, I'm geussing you come here often?"

[Rex Idiotarum]

Hm, the hiccup's gone, erased from fool's memories, which mean's a powerful threat's coming to confront us.

[Saurous]

"...yeah. Although I usually visit through research rather than actually coming here. It changes a lot, so you never really know what to expect.' He pauses, looking around. "I always forget how breathtaking this place is. Albeit, a bit too colorful for my taste...

[Cyrano]

Hellooooo! You are not SUPPOSED to be altruistic! Bah. nevermind. Off in some other land where "evil" equals "saving lives." Wimps!

And Rex, unless Fool is a name, then you have badly grammaricalness!

[Mr. Moon]

"Somehow, I don't think researching this kind of environment would tell you much. You know, the whole realm of madness makes one think that it might be, you know, constantly changing." The drow/elf shrugs, resting her greatsword on her shoulder. "But you're right. It's really an amazing terrain. I should take Maur here, teach him about military tactics in unstable terrain."


((Edit: Meh. My brother wants on, so I have to go. Gah. Tomarow's monday....))

[Rex Idiotarum]

"Fool" is a subtle reference to Saurous.

[Lord Fullbladder, Master of Goblins]

And Rex, unless Fool is a name, then you have badly grammaricalness!

"What ye've got 'ere be nuttin' but a vein o' Fool's Gold!"

The Idiot Lord is grammatically correct, you insolent worm.

[Cyrano]

"What ye've got 'ere be nuttin' but a vein o' Fool's Gold!"

The Idiot Lord is grammatically correct, you insolent worm.

Insolent? Insolent? ILL SHOW YOU INSOLENT!

*ahem*

Maybe I wanna go to that party, eh? YOu go all the time! Go out with your little adult friends and just "have a few drinks" and "Fool around" eh? Well, maybe I'd like to fool around to! Bloody hypocrite, you can't stop me! Ha!

Also, Idiot Lord is, grammatically, "The Lord who is an Idiot."

Therefore, you are WRONGO.

And he was grammatically correct, when he said it was a name.

[Rex Idiotarum]

Actually, it's "The King of the Idiots," or "The Idiot's King"

[Lord Fullbladder, Master of Goblins]

Not really, and you are insolent, and I'm very far from wrong, much less wrongo.

[Cyrano]

Actually, it's "The King of the Idiots," or "The Idiot's King"

I know what your name is. Lord Fullbladder The Goblin Master Dude Guy Person called you the "Idiot Lord." Thats missaying your name. I was just being grammatical.

And, ^ I already SAID I was insolent, why are you far from wrong, and how can you be far from wrongo without any proof you aren't wrong?

[Lord Magtok]

*Sneaks around quietly, breaking some of Saurous's stuff, and putting traps on the more valuable things.*

[Saurous]

*The objects reform, and the traps disappear. A laser cannon slides out of it's niche in the cieling, and aims at Magtok. A note sits on top of it. It reads:


Get the Hell out of my vault, Magtok.

-Saurous

The cannon begins charging*

[Lord Magtok]

Damn...

*Walks away, towards Fus's room.*

He did that thing once...and now I'm going to get my revenge!

*Does the same thing that was done in Saurous's room, only to Fus's stuff. And with a sledgehammer.*

[Fus.Weapon 1337]

*pops out of nowhere, grabs the sledgehammer, and smashes Magtok with it. Again. And again. And again.*

[Castaras]

* Laughs at all the chaos *

Wait...I'm still a pinafore? AHHH!

* Floats away *

[V Junior]

AMEN! Pray to whatever evil gods you serve!

An epic paladin celestial weilding a Holy Avenger is in the air.

I am the Celestial V! All evil in this horrid den of scoundrels will be destroyed by MY SWORD! DIE! SMITE EVIL!

-charges, and chops Magtok's body to bits, and any clone afterwards. also, i destroy the pinafore. for the fun of it-

[Rex Idiotarum]

O! A Fight!
* Tags the Paladin with a Sword Draw Technique and Continues to Swiftly hit even after the kick-back has been initiated, after the Plaladib get Out of reach, Rex disappears and hits the Paladin from the other side preforming an array of techniques until out of reach and teleports underneath the Paladin and hits upward in the roof. *

I call the maneuver "Pong."

[V Junior]

-smite rex-

Chaoctic Evil? HA! Stupid Evil more like! Smite Evil! HAHA!

-uses cleric abilities to heal self :P-

Until next time, AMEN... Until next time...

-plane shift-

[Rex Idiotarum]

In one swift movement that appears to be a bock of the smite, he spray some of his own blood on the Paladin.

[V Junior]

Hmm? Blood? Oh dear... -wipe wipe- AGH! COME OFF! -gets the ariel out- Ah well... -cleans at 30 degrees- :P

[Rex Idiotarum]

* as the pally washes off, symbols remain, they remain attached to that pally's skin in fact. *

* Rex, back at home, sits down on the couch *

Ah, the nature of curses, she'll find this one to be hell. Blood curses can't be cursed.

[Goblin Music]

interesting good thing i got transdimensional spell

(normality restored)

[Korith]

Hmm? Blood? Oh dear... -wipe wipe- AGH! COME OFF! -gets the ariel out- Ah well... -cleans at 30 degrees- :P

*Activates dimensional auto-follow spell*

No need to slaughter me, Ms. Paladin. I am not one of those Chaotic Moronic feebleminded followers of a possessed robot in a cloak.

Though I do make a pretty good sword golem.

*Ahem*

I would like to procure a certain...supply...of holy weaponry for my Mark-Omega Sword Golem. It's simply an emergency backup in case I have to slaughter all of AMEN on a moment's notice and don't have the spells to do it myself.

[V Junior]

*Activates dimensional auto-follow spell*

No need to slaughter me, Ms. Paladin. I am not one of those Chaotic Moronic feebleminded followers of a possessed robot in a cloak.

Though I do make a pretty good sword golem.

*Ahem*

I would like to procure a certain...supply...of holy weaponry for my Mark-Omega Sword Golem. It's simply an emergency backup in case I have to slaughter all of AMEN on a moment's notice and don't have the spells to do it myself.

She turns towards you.

Name your price.

((tell me over PM))

[Lord Fullbladder, Master of Goblins]

Fullbladder cringes away, putting a shoulder between Crazy Sword Lady and his necessary-to-being-Fullbladder organs. He also brings up both hands and makes the 'sanctuary' cross-type gesture.

"I'M NEUTRAL! I'M NEUTRAL! Not that it'll probably matter, being a member of a 'monster' race and all... PLEASE DON'T KILL ME! I'M A PHYSICIAN!"

[Castaras]

* Summons another kitchen to replace broken one *

Ah, that's good.

* Walks in and starts cooking and brewing to fill up empty shelves. *

[Vespe Ratavo]

Vespe builds a pool filled with sharks with frickin' laser beams on their heads.

[Rex Idiotarum]

Is that in the budget? *Rex says from the couch. *

Meh, I have some... errands I have to attain to. Magtok, don't let this place be destroyed while I'm gone.

O! and, * he snaps his fingers, that paladin's chest starts to burn * come find me if you want to get that off. *disappears out a portal *

[Saurous]

*Maur wanders into Vespe's shark room, and rubs his hands together. He walks over to the sharks, and fiddles with the frickin' laser beams on their heads*

[Lord Magtok]

*A new clone of Magtok shows up from a cloning lab that was convieniently located far out of the paladin's reach.*

Why does this place smells like Good? *Holds nose.*

And why don't paladins ever bathe?

[Goblin Music]

the RC car zips in to the tank o sharks and zips around in there.

[Saurous]

*Maur finishes his meddling, and walks away, whistling innocently*



***

Meanwhile, back in the Shivering Isles, the two AMENites begin approaching the massive shadow of a city in the distance after a very uninteresting walk down the roadway. Saurous raises his arms in the air.

"Freakin' finally."

[Lord Magtok]

*Magtok gets to building some random robo-death machine, and orders a Titan from "Metal Arms:Glitch in the System" to riddle the kitchen with bullets and blast it with rockets.*

[Saurous]

*Maur walks over to Magtok, watching him build his robot death machine*

Whatcha' doing?

*He hides his various robotic-system-ruining devices behind his back*

[Lord Magtok]

Me? I'm just building something so it looks like I actually am getting something accomplished, while I install the game SW: Empire at War directly into my mind.

...Whats that behind your back?

[Mr. Moon]

*Maur finishes his meddling, and walks away, whistling innocently*



***

Meanwhile, back in the Shivering Isles, the two AMENites begin approaching the massive shadow of a city in the distance after a very uninteresting walk down the roadway. Saurous raises his arms in the air.

"Freakin' finally."


Moon Called smiles. "Yup." She looks at the city, and shudders. "I don't much like the looks of that place. Oh well. Maybe I can get some training in." The elf/drow shrugs, and continues on.

[Lord Fullbladder, Master of Goblins]

A bored camerazard launches itself Mission Impossible-style from the ceiling, securely fastened by some strange, technorganic vine. It lands on Magtok's head, and looks upside down at his face quizzically. Then it looks quickly at Maur, then at the robotic destruction derby occuring. The camera protruding from it's skull buzzes slightly as it zooms in and a light flickers at it's side as it begins recording. The spool of film sticking slightly out the top of the camera begins to rotate as film is used.

[Saurous]

"Hopefully we'll be able to get an audience with Sheogorath before the day is over. Bliss and Crucible are fine places, they don't have too much violence in either, but you never know what kind of psychopath you may run into..." He trails off, and leaves Moon to figure out the rest.

((And I'll be right back. The shower is calling me.))

[Mr. Moon]

Moon Called shrugs. "I should be able to fend for myself." She smiles, and heads forward.

((I've gotta go. Brother wants on. I want my own computer...))

[Vespe Ratavo]

Vespe comes into his shark room. James Bond descends from a cage in the ceiling.
Do you expect me to talk?
No, Mr. Bond, I expect you to die! Fire the lasers!
Nothing happens.
I said FIRE THE LASERS!
The sharks happily flap their tails.
Oh well. Now, Mister Bond, before I slowly lower you into the shark pool, I must tell you my plans for world domination in great detail. You see, I plan to take over all the timestreams, as it is my only chance at bringing back my friends and family to life, or at least that's what the devil said. Now, I plan to take over this timestream by...
While Vespe blathers on, James Bond teleports away.
And then we take the frickin laser and....darn. He got away. Stupid everyone taking Wizard levels... Vespe goes off to his room.

[Goblin Music]

the RC car shoots (which is in the tank) a bomb at Vespe

[Vespe Ratavo]

Vespe gets hurt. Why you little.... He shoots frickin laser beams from his frickin eyes at the car.

[Lord Magtok]

*Magtok wanders away from the scene between the car and Vespe, hoping to not get injured as badly as he did yesterday(or was it that day before yesterday?)

He moves slowly, trying to not annoy the Zard on his head.*

[Goblin Music]

the shark tank takes all the damage.

[Vespe Ratavo]

Cthulu Flaghn Ryleh!
Vespe turns into Cthulu and grabs the Car/tank and condemns it to a horrible claw/tentacly death.

[Goblin Music]

a voice issues from the indestructible amphibious RC car
tis just a flesh wound!

[Vespe Ratavo]

Cthulu turns back into Vespe and pulls out a Holy Hand Grenade. One, Two, FIVE! He hurls it at the car.

[Goblin Music]

the explosion sends the car spinning towards Vespe
i am invincible!!!

[Vespe Ratavo]

The car hits Vespe in the head and he is knocked out.

[Fus.Weapon 1337]

I feel odd. Hmm.

[Lord Fullbladder, Master of Goblins]

The Zard jumps down from Magtok's head, heading over and filming the other fight.

[Lord Magtok]

Whew, its gone.

*Gets back to pretending to work on something important.*

[Korith]

Why does this place smells like Good? *Holds nose.*

Korith steps out of his lab

Tainted weapon experiment. Could you believe that a Paladin would sell holy weapons to the likes of me? Someone's probably going to fall from their high and mighty soon...

[Reptilus]

"That smell is awful!" Reptilus' distorted voice manages, coming out of a psychic trance.

[Goblin Music]

could it be the holy hand grenade?

[Cyrano]

THIS ENTIRE PLACE IRKS ME!
I DEMAND we replace all instances of the word "good" with the word Dead Seal! That would make far more sense. Get to it!
Also, is there nowhere a man can get in a little cephalopod summoning? Seriously guys! This is pathetic! What am I supposed to do! Throw squid at CTHULU?

[Korith]

I've added an exanded dimensional space in the basement. Just go down there and say "Klaatu Barata Nikto" and it will open up for you.

Just make sure you say all three words, or else you'll be spat out on a Githyanki Crystal Palace in the Astral Plane...and they aren't fond of visitors, if you know what I mean.

The summoning altar down there has been approved for use by the Lords of the Nine, Seventeen Demigods, and the Ice Cream Salesman of the Far Realm.

[Rex Idiotarum]

O! Well, I couldn't upload them, but I made 4 new AMEN banners. Expect to see them up in the near future. And when you do, sig one.

...and here they are:
http://i115.photobucket.com/albums/n291/rexidiotarum/bloodBanner.png

http://i115.photobucket.com/albums/n291/rexidiotarum/cyberdead.png

http://i115.photobucket.com/albums/n291/rexidiotarum/pies.gif

http://i115.photobucket.com/albums/n291/rexidiotarum/outoblood.jpg

[Castaras]

http://i115.photobucket.com/albums/n291/rexidiotarum/pies.gif

MINE! *Shifty look*

Can I have this one? Please?! It's awesome!

[Lord Magtok]

Whoa...that is amazing. The first and second are my favorites.

I can't read what the second one says at the bottom, though.

[Rex Idiotarum]

<snippity>

MINE! *Shifty look*

Can I have this one? Please?! It's awesome!
Yeah, why do you think I made it?

[Goblin Music]

http://i115.photobucket.com/albums/n291/rexidiotarum/bloodBanner.png

*Yoinked*

[Cyrano]

You stole my b anner!
And anyway, no proper insanist could run out of blood. Thats what veins are FOR.

[Rex Idiotarum]

There's plenty to go around.
I figured Banner #1 would be the default, but Magtok and Saurous would take Banner #2, #3(the only animated one of the bunch) was made in respect to Castaras, and I did Banner #4 for fun.

Hey, it was fun to do, expect more in the future.

[Saurous]

Well, you were correct about me taking the zombie/cyborg banner. If it's got a zombie in it, I'm sure to use it.

...wait, I thought I wasn't in the base at the moment.

[Goblin Music]

look in my siggy spoiler. i put it there.

[Rex Idiotarum]

look in my siggy spoiler. i put it there.
That's what they're there for.

[Goblin Music]

hey rex what is the hight and width in pixels

[Rex Idiotarum]

400x200.
Yeah, I like the perfect Half-square.
That's Width*Height

[Goblin Music]

http://i126.photobucket.com/albums/p102/kimdragon/oots/GoblinsStuff/AMENbaner2.gif
muahahahahahahahahaha yea is sucks
Also
http://i126.photobucket.com/albums/p102/kimdragon/oots/GoblinsStuff/AMENbaner.gif

[Cyrano]

I just want a banner that says

"Several Animals Were Harmed In The Making Of THis Banner"
Thats just, yaknow.
US.

[Rex Idiotarum]

I'll get to work on it tomorrow.

[Cyrano]

I love you. Very much.

*hugs, braces self against ineveitable burny death or diabetes*

[Saurous]

*After a few moments of silence, an invisible force of evil smacks D'anna across the face*

No hugging.



***

Oh, look, it's the Shivering Isles. Again.

Saurous heads up to the city gates, looking about at the guards. The Saints look back at him, their golden eyes glowing. Saurous smirks, and pushes one of the doors open, and steps into Mania.

[Rex Idiotarum]

No hugging until you gain a discernible gender.

[Vespe Ratavo]

Ooh! Does that mean I can hug everyone!? Wait a... minute... I feel sorta...weird... oh well. *hugs Rex*

((Back in a few mins, Daily Show is calling me))

[Lord Fullbladder, Master of Goblins]

Fullbladder pops in. Seeing Vespe, he suddenly yells "I CLAIM FULL RESPONSIBILTY!" and disappears again.

[Saurous]

*The same invisible force smacks the female Vespe*

I said no hugging. :smallannoyed:

[Cobra_Ikari]

Ikari wakes up from his coma and glomps Saurous.

[Rex Idiotarum]

You there, Snake, take a banner!

[Lord Magtok]

Ikari wakes up from his coma and glomps Saurous.

*Suddenly draws a shotgun from nowhere.*

Hey! No interdimensional hugging!

[Saurous]

*Ikari gets a message saying: "We're sorry, but Saurous is not here at the moment, and will be replaced with Happiness for all odd and violent acts against Saurous. If you need to speak to Saurous, you can contact him in the Realm of Madness. That is all."

So, Ikari just ended up glomping Happiness*

AGH! Get it off! Get it off!

[Cobra_Ikari]

A banner, Sir of the Pogo? Where might I find such a banner?

He pulls a guitar from nowhere and begins shredding.

[Vespe Ratavo]

Vespe gets smacked. It is not proper to hit a lady. Wait a minute... *idea*

Ten minutes later...
Woo! I'm invisible!
((Be back in a few mins))

[Saurous]

Uh, Ikari, why is it that you tried to glomp me? And why are you talking like that?

[Vespe Ratavo]

Vespe turns back into a man. He quickly puts on his clothes and runs to his room.

[Cobra_Ikari]

I dunno...I feel...funny...

He ties a mask over his eyes and draws a rapier before shouting in Spanish.

[Rex Idiotarum]

I direct you to the Previous page.

[Lord Magtok]

I dunno...I feel...funny...

He ties a mask over his eyes and draws a rapier before shouting in Spanish.

What was that you shouted about my mother in Spanish, you scaly worm?!? :smallfurious:

*Draws a rapier.*

[Saurous]

*Happiness takes a few steps away from the madness*

Of course the two people who are sane around here are stuck in the Shivering Isles...

...wait, Cobra's gonna do what to my mother?! :smallfurious:

[Lord Magtok]

*Hands Happiness a crowbar.*

Lets get 'im!

[Cobra_Ikari]

My nemesis, Lord Magtok! Do you not know? I fight...for the people!

He slashes at Magtok.

[Saurous]

*Happiness smashes Cobra over the head several times with the crowbar*

Sorry.

[Cobra_Ikari]

Screw this.

He eviscerates Happiness with the SoJ Mk I.

Anyone else?

[Lord Magtok]

*Magtok simply blocks the sword's blow with his right arm.*

I'm not done yet, worm.

[Cobra_Ikari]

Ikari chucks away the rapier and switches to a two-hand stance.

Neither am I.

[Saurous]

I seem to be...eviscerated. I don't need to be shredded. That's not good for my health.

*Happiness slumps to the floor in his pooling blood*

[Lord Magtok]

*Tosses aside rapier.*

Forget that useless thing, I can kill you with my bare hands!

...But that isn't what an Evil Overlord type would do...so instead...

*Draws a pistol and shoots Ikari in the gut.*

[Cobra_Ikari]

Ikari drops the sword.

Magtok...you bastard...

He stumbles over and hugs Magtok.

...die.

He slaps a large explosive to Magtok's back and rolls away, pulling a table down as a shield, and pushes the detonator.

[Lord Magtok]

Oh crap...nothing's happening...

...IT'S A DUD?!? :smallconfused: Woo! :smallbiggrin:

*Removes explosives and runs downstairs to play videogames.*

I survived! Hooray!

[Saurous]

...I...I...Don't think so!

*Happiness stumbles down the stairs after Magtok, pulling out a revolver. He lands a few shots in Magtok's head before falling to the floor again*

[Lord Magtok]

*Is hit only in the robot half of head.*

Wow. Today sure is my lucky day! I survive explosives, bullets to the head, and who knows what next?

*Kicks Happiness while he's down.*

[Cobra_Ikari]

Ikari presses the detonator again, causing the small, but highly potent, charge he attatched to Magtok's fleshy arm to detonate.

[Saurous]

*Happiness rolls over onto his back, and looks up*

I think you made an error in your plans, Magtok. I don't think MC's gonna be happy to see that her "pet" is lying dead, and I don't think Saur is gonna be happy about seeing me dead, either. Imagine the pain they can cause you...

[Lord Magtok]

*Suddenly loses left arm, and hears what Happiness says.*

...Crap. I hadn't thought of that.

...*Reluctantly orders a healer droid to aid Happiness, and tells another one to get Happiness a milkshake. A milkshake not made by Castaras.*

[Saurous]

Thank'e kindly. And, as far as those two lovebirds know, this incident never happened.

*Happiness begins drinking the milkshake*

[Goblin Music]

the RC car lets of the fully automatic 0.22 pistol at CI

[Rex Idiotarum]

Ah! My new banner is teh pwn.
Many, Many animals were killed in the making of this banner.
'cept I can't put it on here because it's on a floppy disk, and none of these computers use those anymore, and even if I could get it off, I couldn't get onto Photobucket due to the overzealous firewall. Proxies won't let me upload. But let me tell you, it includes a few forum members in it.
Can you guess who?

[Goblin Music]

Caw, Blood, and others i cant think.. oh! and CI

[Castaras]

EVIL members? AMEN members?

[Lord Magtok]

Ah! My new banner is teh pwn.
Many, Many animals were killed in the making of this banner.
'cept I can't put it on here because it's on a floppy disk, and none of these computers use those anymore, and even if I could get it off, I couldn't get onto Photobucket due to the overzealous firewall. Proxies won't let me upload. But let me tell you, it includes a few forum members in it.
Can you guess who?

If the animals are forum folk and you used their avvies without permission, you know whats going to happen, right?

[Rex Idiotarum]

Damn, I forgot about Caw, but I did include Blood, who's CI?
I have two others.

And no, I did not use there avatars. I made allusions to their avatars.

[Goblin Music]

Ah! My new banner is teh pwn.
Many, Many animals were killed in the making of this banner.
'cept I can't put it on here because it's on a floppy disk, and none of these computers use those anymore, and even if I could get it off, I couldn't get onto Photobucket due to the overzealous firewall. Proxies won't let me upload. But let me tell you, >>it includes a few forum members in it<<.
Can you guess >>who<<?
that answer your questions?

[Castaras]

CI - Cobra Ikari? I think.

[Rex Idiotarum]

Surprisingly, I did not include the avatar of my own creation.
Although he is an AMEN meber, maybe I should...

[Lord Magtok]

Surprisingly, I did not include the avatar of my own creation.
Although he is an AMEN meber, maybe I should...

*Starts chanting*

Kill the snake!
Kill the snake!
Kill the snake!
Kill the snake!
Kill the snake!
Kill the snake!

[Castaras]

*Starts chanting*

Kill the snake!
Kill the snake!
Kill the snake!
Kill the snake!
Kill the snake!
Kill the snake!

No, no, no! You torture him first, then kill him!

[Goblin Music]

No, no, no! You torture him first, then kill him!
yes torture him make him scream in pain

[Lord Magtok]

No, no, no! You torture him first, then kill him!

You think I didn't already know that? :smallconfused:

*A paladin named Guilt enters AMEN.*

Magtok, I have to talk to you.

You again? How did you get past the anti-NPC paladin security network? You shuld be a pile of ashes right now!

That is unimportant. Magtok, you demolished Castaras's kitchen.

Well she tried to demolish my self-esteem.

Two wrongs don't make a right.

Well why should I care?

Remember ehat I did to your mind last time we met?

:smalleek: I still have the scars...

Now go fix the kitchen while I tell one of your robots to make me a milkshake.

:smalleek: *gulp* Yes, sir. *Begins to repair the kitchen.*

Man, I hate that bas-

What was that, worm?

What? I didn't say anything.

Good. Lets keep things that way.

[Castaras]

Errm, why are you trying to rebuild my already rebuilt kitchen Magtok? :smallconfused:

[Lord Magtok]

The paladin said so. And this microwave over here is still a bit damaged.

[Rex Idiotarum]

Guilt? That's not evil.
Hey Magtok, have no Regrets!
* Kills Guilt and Magtok *

Maybe I shouldn't have done that...
I should've tortured them first.

[Castaras]

Torturing normally goes down well.

And Magtok, you're trying to repair that microwave? Go on then, I don't mind.

[Lord Magtok]

Guilt? That's not evil.
Hey Magtok, have no Regrets!
* Kills Guilt and Magtok *

Maybe I shouldn't have done that...
I should've tortured them first.

*Guilt dies, shouts a profanity at Rex, and asks his gods to cast their curse over his mind for the rest of eternity.*

*A new Magtok clone shows up.*

Thanks for that, Rex.

Gods, I hated that paladin. His name didn't even make sense! He just tried to make me feel guilty, and then cut me up when I didn't listen.

[Rex Idiotarum]

O! Crap, I've gone Sane!

...wait, nevermind... Good curses are incredibly weak.

[Lord Magtok]

O! Crap, I've gone Sane!

...wait, nevermind... Good curses are incredibly weak.

I honestly didn't expect that curse to accomplish anything anyways.

*Shoots microwave with a silenced PP7 (James Bond pistol.)*

[Castaras]

* Microwave explodes into tiny pieces *

[Lord Magtok]

*Heads to basement to go play videogames.*

[Rex Idiotarum]

Reveals new banner.

[Goblin Music]

http://i126.photobucket.com/albums/p102/kimdragon/oots/GoblinsStuff/Banner-1.gif
what it has more sense than rex's

[Castaras]

They're both good, but I prefer Rex's.

Someone else can have those, I'll be keeping my nice little pie banner.

[Mr. Moon]

((Rex... make one for me? *puppy dog eyes*))

[Saurous]

*Maur and Happiness ride throught atopt horses*

Ye-haw!

Your sure this is a good idea?Magtok's sure to have a field-day with all the jokes he can come up with.

*Maur turns around, pulls out a revolver, and shoots Happiness inbetween the eyes*

..ow.

((And I think I'll be keeping my zombie cyborg banner))


***

Meanwhile, Sheogorath appears and pastes a note onto Saurous's face. It reads:


Damnit, Saurous. Get on with the plot!

-Sheogorath.

[Mr. Moon]

((I'm just here untill my Science teacher decides we should go back to class, so I'll do what I can.))

Moon Called chuckles. "She has a point. Let's get going."

((Sheogorath is a she, right? It sounds like a female name...))

[Castaras]

* Leans on doorframe *

Oh look, Maur and Happiness are having fun together. How sweet. :smallamused:

[Goblin Music]

the RC car zips around 42 42 42 42 42 42 42 42 42 42 42

[Saurous]

((Sheogorath is a man. He's the Prince of Madness))

"Yeah, we should."

He removes the note from his face, which is followed by a few yelps. He tosses it aside, and moves further into Bliss.

The buildings of the city are very elegant, towering above the streets. The streets are made of cobblestone, and the buildings all have odd, scale-like roofing made of golden material. Beautiful plants grow out of the cracks in the street, and the sun shines down from above.

"I don't think my retinas are going to be intact by the end of this adventure."

Saurous heads up some stones steps, heading towards the eastern wall. A tall building is visible on the opposite side of the wall.

[Rex Idiotarum]

A Moon Called Banner?

For some reason I feel the urge to involve the Banana Phone.

[Goblin Music]

so did i rex, so did i