Quote Originally Posted by Astrella View Post
Considering I've had people get angry over just mentioning the word privilege...
Yeah, exactly. Some people REALLY don't want to know.


Quote Originally Posted by Astrella View Post
gender / family rant:
Spoiler
Show
So, went checking out new dorms this morning because I likely won't be eligible for the one I'm at anymore next year. So doing something important with my mom, which is already recipe for disaster. At one point we couldn't find a particular dorm and spent about an hour looking, which was accompanied with constant shouting between mum and dad. Same on the way back; so went I got to work in the afternoon, I was already really worn and stressed out (Sidenote; dorm assigment is done to promote diversity; gender, age and study subject wise; so my mum was all joking "I should've had a daughter and a son for more diversity" ... Was so tempted to just shout "You have a frikkin' daughter!" But that would've been a bad idea. And then there was such stuff as casual racism from clients which I of course couldn't call out easily and at the end of the day I was just so worked up that every time I got misgendered felt like a slap in the face and I had to fight back tears at several points...

I did manage to stealth-buy a pair of leggings at work though.
That sounds so tough, fair play to you for getting through it. I hope you find a safe, inclusive, happy dorm. And cool about the leggings! Also, when you said you were looking for "dorms" I misread it as "doms" and I was like

Quote Originally Posted by Arachu View Post
*Holds tightly* Yesterday my mom randomly looked at my nails...
Spoiler
Show
Her: "Ugh, Scotty, I don't know how you stand having your nails like that. Ugh! Like something out of a vampire movie - ugh!"

Me: "I like them."

Her: [exactly what she just said]

Me: [exactly what I just said]

...

Me: "That reminds me, can I have nail polish or something? I'm getting tired of them bending on things."

Her: *Horrified look* "Uh-uh. That's Gay. Girls paint their nails." (Have I mentioned she's an utter misogynist? )

Me: "It's not painting, it's reinforcing them so they don't break on me." (they're not really likely to anytime soon - the last time I trimmed my thumbnail I found that the trimming was capable of being folded in the same place about 3 times before it even started to form a white line)

Her: [Exactly what she just said, plus a rather rude comment about clipping them]

Me: "Don't they make clear polish, or varnish or something? I don't see how it's girly to make part of you stronger."

Her: [Some other homophobic comment]


She proceeded to glance at them every five seconds or so until we reached my friend's house. I considered telling her to stop, but then I remembered how she always made me cut my hair so I subtly angled them to make certain she'd get an eyeful.



~Bianca
Fair play to you as well. If it helps, a clear nail polish or nail treatment to help prevent long nails from breaking can also be called "nail strengthener" (grr, manly strength!), "nail hardener" (grr, manly hardness!) or just "nail treatment" (grr, manly ... treats! )

It sounds as though you're mother's pretty unsympathetic, and in a strangely sexist way. I mean, my little brother has long nails (he hates cutting them often, and likes the feeling of them long). I just try to bother him into keeping them reasonably clean-looking! My parents kept trying to get him to cut his nails (and hair), but from a practicality point of view. They also tried to get me to cut my nails and hair, although I was better at looking after my long nails when I had them. I prefer short nails and hair now, although my hair is growing out at the moment.

Anyway, would it be possible for you to acquire nail-whatever without her explicit consent? Do you ever shop alone, or could you slip off? Do you go out with friends where you could stop in a pharmacy or something? Or could someone sympathetic grab some for you? Hell, I will! (Assuming your mom isn't quite crazy enough to search your post.)

Quote Originally Posted by Lix Lorn View Post
(HUGS)



I can counterbalance with my own story. I came out to my (previously mentioned as slightly bigoted) grandfather, and he was really supportive. Well, he was supportive about the bi part. He kinda brushed the trans part away... but better than I feared.