Strange, I saw her behaviour as the one described common for mages. Or what you'd expect from one raised in a family of mages. And from what I remember they didn't really show (in the Anime) if she thought differently from her husband regarding the adoption. But ten again, it was some time ago I saw that part.
We don't really know what influence her opinions had on her world, maybe she got the way she wanted and we only see the result not the build-up.
And if she is a doormat, well then let her. I'm certain that there are quite a few doormats out there in the world which she can be the representative of.