Quote Originally Posted by flyingchicken View Post
And here, I practice painting some more; as promised, before I had head, head with neck, and now here's head to torso:
Spoiler
Show
I agree with Madcrafter that the expression does look a little odd. I'm not sure why that is though. Perhaps the left side of the smile should end more to a point like the other. The bottom line for the mouth should curve upward faster. If that makes sense. And if you were going for a roguish lopsided style grin. It is very nice though.
In my opinion, the hair colors look a bit *too* blended for Dash hair though, especially in the yellow and orange in the highlights but that's more of a personal choice. Darn rainbow hair is annoying to work with.


Quote Originally Posted by Gnomish Wanderer View Post
Just wanted to show off the first page of this comic a friend and I are working on.
Spoiler
Show

We have 4 of the 6 Pages 'finished' (there's still more clean-up to do once we're finished colouring) but we haven't been able to work on the final pages in a while >.>
Nice, but the major nitpick which bothers me is the fourth and fifth panels.
Nity-nit-picks

Spoiler
Show
The forth panel has a sudden crash, with a assortment of debris. And the final panel has the robot looking up at a hole in the ceiling. The problem is, up until the final panel the ceiling has not appeared in the comic so the sudden action and the appearance of a ruined ceiling seems rather jarring. To fix this, you could use the first panel to show more of the place the robot is in, in an angle which includes the ceiling as well. It's a visual narrative cliche when showing a new scene to give a shot(s) which shows most of area of interest, and then go down the more personal shots. But it's a cliche because it works, it is even more important when parts of the environment and character will interact with each character in a sudden manner. There are times when you might do the opposite, say, if a character is waking up, get a personal shot of there eyes opening, blinking or whatever and then have the last panel of them looking around there environment. But if the ceiling is going to suddenly fall, you should establish the ceiling beforehand. If rocks are going to fall, then I should see the party in a canyon or cave or something beforehand.
And when the debris falls, why not put some of those octagonal panels that make up parts of the ceiling in the last panel? This will also connect the narrative and make the action less jarring. Also, if possible, you can also show the robot reacting to the crash, perhaps instead of a panel with only crash and the debris, you can have the top part of the robot in the panel like you have in panel five. This will give the action some space and tell the viewer where the debris is falling from with regards to the character.


Take it all with a grain of salt though, a hack's advice is a hack's advice. Would love to see the other pages!

Quote Originally Posted by Diego Havoc View Post
Y'know, I just saw that picture, and then someone sent this in to the ponythread tumblr:
Spoiler
Show

Was just thinking that your picture goes rather well. Could maybe use some party hats though
Yes! Party hats! This is a thing! I shall make this a thing!

I'm glad your back! It's probably late, but I hope you had a good trip!


A-83 or "Now with Party Hats!"
Spoiler
Show

Just added party hats. I like this version better, earthen colors plus a splash of color look good together. The gaudy colors are like spice, too much and it's bad, but enough in there and it's delicious!
Spoiler
Show



Links

At least I think so... Alright maybe not.
Anyway, I cleaned up those snake coils and various other things. So yay! Time to throw this one in the bin and start again!