Personal Woes and Advice 2

[MonkeyBusiness]

Jeff,

I was thinking about you yesterday, and it occurred to me that you are a skilled writer, and one with something to write about. I think you'd excell as a writer.

I realize this is not what you dreamed about. But do consider it as a "for now" kind of hobby. It might provide some insight and direction.

Meanwhile ... do I really need to tell you not to hit the sauce? Let yourself feel the emotion. Yes, it sucks. But alcohol is really just a kind of procrastination. if you don't deal with them sober, the emotions you get drunk to avoid will come back again.

So, please don't.

Alarra,

The tough choices just never stop, do they?

My feeling is this: just because someone has gone out of her way to make one choice "easy" or "obvious" does not make that the right choice. It seems to me that there is a lot of what might be called moral pressure here. Turning down work is often seen as sort of sin against society, particularly when work is hard to find (as it is) and when one has a family (as you do). And there is some truth to this, because one must make a responsible choice, even if it is difficult or not the path you dreamed you'd take.

I can't say if moving to SD is a good or bad choice for you. I have no crystal ball, and I can't see your future. But here are some things I do know:

Turning down work is not a sin. You are meeting your responsibilities, even though it is hard. That's the ethic that matters.

People who love us often say they are trying to help us. But they help they offer is not always the help we need.

Sometimes the best help is no help at all.

Divide and conquer is a tactic often used in families. You and Zeb need to be a united front on this, even if you are living in separate states for now. It's not fair, or a good idea, to say we can't because Zeb ..."

If you have a plan, it is best to stick to it. Your plan for school sounds like a good one.

Moving home is not a defeat if it helps you do what you really want. It is if it will cause you to stall out as you follow your plans.

Inertia is the hardest force to overcome. The best choice is the one than provides the most momentum for the next choice.

Most important: you can't see into the future. All you can do is constantly reassess how well your plans are unfolding. If you are making progress, even if the progress is slow, that is good.



-Monkey






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