D&D Snippets II: The Snippetting

[Dr Bwaa]

One of the reasons that I've been so slow posting my own stuff recently is that I've actually got two large-scale writing projects that I'm working on.

The first is the Joseph's Gap story that I've posted five snippets from so far (and I still owe you guys another edit of part 5; I haven't forgotten even though you all have). As I've mentioned before, part six is underway, but taking a while due to there being a lot of stuff to cram into it as well as my attempting to change my snippet format slightly for this story (they are getting longer and hopefully a bit stronger in terms of detail and characterization). This one is also being somewhat sabotaged by the fact that I'm also separately working on the snippet I mentioned over in this post.

I am also simultaneously working on what is technically a background for a high-level D&D character I play, though since its conception it has developed into a much more full-fledged story that will be closer to novel-length by the time I finish it (ugh). I've posted one draft-snippet here (the second snippet in that post) from that story as well, although it's not as great as I'd like. The story doesn't lend itself to snippeting as well as JG because I'm trying to focus more on its literary merits, so snippetting is likely to involve posting long chapters, or a lot of context, or both, but I'm okay with that if you are. The plus side to this one is that I already have a lot written, which gives me a buffer that I could start posting while I keep working on other things.

So the question I have for you guys is, which would you be more interested in reading next? If I know that at least someone wants me to write more of one of these guys in particular, it'll (hopefully) inspire my motivation glands to do something useful for a change. So what do you folks want next?

• Joseph's Gap VI: Slime, Muck, and Filth
• Laelah Vrenn (heavier prose and I'll probably start at the beginning)

@Winds

Spoiler

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"The white-cloaked man, called Conquest?

I definitely thought the voice was telling Kalach that his name was Conquest; I had to go back and reread it several times to pick up on the fact that apparently the four silhouettes were speaking to the white-cloaked man, even though there were looking at Kalach?

Incidentally, it's even more unpleasant when your eyes see through darkness.

What is? This is a kind of weird line and I don't know that it adds much value as it is. What is it that you're trying to convey--directly and implicitly--with this?

shooting every zombie in the place

With what? Magical energy? Bullets? Arrows? Given the setting I can't take any of those things for granted; you've gotta give me more or I can't picture it.

We saw no living humans

Is the man in white not human?

Jessica spread her wings.

"I'm going to go check on my friend."

Wat.

"Yes. Too late to worry about it, though."

"That's almost our motto..."

Haha, it really is.

Aileph stood up and started to trudge after her.

What? How? Didn't she literally just fly away?

I couldn't think of anything to do, so I took out the journal and start writing.

So Kol is now standing around awkwardly I guess?

Then, I felt a pain in my stomach...and saw blood spread across the pages.

Standing around awkwardly not watching out for arrows, apparently. For that matter, how do you get shot by a guy on the horizon when you're flying around in a hot air balloon?

But this time, my soul doesn't wander far.

Great line