Looketh, this are the reasons I yearn for fleeing from my land of births (an of ironic not origin); to the places where one can have the wonders of nature without having to leave the concepts of civilisation.
Seems like a fair tradeoff, a life for a photograph.
From said episode I myself prefer the one making fun of Argentina, if only because it's actually plausible considering it's track record.
I believe it would have depended on the region and the origin of said shouter. A Roman in Spain wouldn't have sounded much different than a modern day Spanish speaker; unless you mean Roman as one born in Rome, in which case there would have been more hand gestures rather than words.
I've never felt Portuguese to be close to Latin, it's certainly more melodic and I believe it has a wider gamma of sounds to work with. My main contact with it is mainly through Bossa Nova lyrics which is not a good way to judge a language though. My understanding is that if you know Portuguese you understand Spanish but not the other way around.
Of the romance language apart from obviously Spanish I've had a relatively constant contact with Italian (due to my mother's side being entirely Italian) and the variations from my grandparents native regions.