Quote Originally Posted by Asteron Questar View Post
Here's the situation

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There is this guy (when it's about me there is always a guy) I have been dating for last month and a half. He's nice guy, and I thought there could be something more there, but I don't anymore. The problem is that things have been happening way too fast, and he was never in a relationship. The fact that he has severe abandonment issues doesn't help. (His mother left him when he was born.) The fact that he told me that is enough to know he is too attached to me. I really, really don't want to hurt him, but I don't want to lead him on. Help?
Tell him the truth. You can't avoid hurting him - there is no hurt-free breakup - but you can minimize the hurt by not lying to him.

Tell him what you just told us. He's a nice* guy, you like him enough that you thought there might be more, but there isn't. Offer friendship if applicable. Don't get sucked into long explanations and "what if"s; they only muddle things and allow him to engage in wishful thinking. Keep things simple, and stick to your own emotions.

It's not your job to fix him or to help him heal. That's the job of family and friends and (if his issues are bad enough) a therapist. All you can do is to be honest and decent.

Good luck.


*Might want to personalize that bit.